by Lauren Canan
She walked across the wide living area to the wall of glass that overlooked the vast expanse of Dallas.
“Are you hungry?” Alec inquired from behind her.
She shook her head. “No. But I would dearly love a bath.”
“To your left through that door, Mrs. Morreston.” A man in a hotel uniform stood just inside the doorway to the suite. “Please, allow me to draw it for you. How do you like the water?”
While Shea groped for an answer, Alec interjected, “Very warm. Thanks.” When the man disappeared into the next room, Alec looked at her, his eyes glittering with amusement. “Hopefully you’ll have plenty of hot water.”
She couldn’t help but return his smile. He was referring to the night Scotty had used all the hot water and she’d had to finish her shower in the icy tap from the well. In frustration she’d then gone after a sleeping Alec with a pillow.
“You’ll find some clothes in the closet and bureau. I left it up to the salesclerk to send over what you’d need until you can replenish your wardrobe. If she missed something, let me know.”
“Thanks.”
The master bedroom was as spacious as the vast living area. It had the same wall of glass offering the million-dollar view, only it was dominated by a huge bed draped with silken linens so thick and luxurious it looked as if a person could completely disappear into the softness when she lay down.
The dressing room and bath were just beyond it. Shea was quite certain the oval tub could hold ten people. At least.
She emerged an hour later feeling clean and pampered and smelling of lilacs. Dressed in one of the comfortable new white T-shirts from the bureau, she walked directly to the bed and climbed in.
Exhaustion pulled her into sleep. She had a vague awareness that Alec joined her sometime in the night. His strong arms pulled her close, offering his warmth and security.
* * *
The rays of the morning sun filtered softly through the sheer draperies. Shea opened her eyes, remembering immediately where she was and all that had happened. On the far corner of the bed she spotted a deep red rose with a note underneath it. After picking up the beautiful flower, she inhaled the rich perfumed aroma, then grabbed the small piece of paper.
Knew you needed to rest so I didn’t wake you. I’m in a meeting downstairs.
Coffee and juice on the side table. Back as soon as I can.
-Alec
He had no need to hurry. As far as his plans for the ranch, he would have to wait while she cleared the land of several employees—some of whom lived on the ranch—the horses and roughly three thousand head of cattle. It wouldn’t happen overnight. In fact, she didn’t quite know where to begin. But now that this stumbling block over ownership had been resolved, Alec could get back to his life and somehow she would have to find a way to get on with hers. Wherever that would be. Whatever it entailed.
Fanning through the new clothes that hung in the huge closet, she selected a simple yet elegant dress in robin’s egg blue. There were some pumps with the name Trump in gold lettering on the insole.
As she sipped a cup of delicious coffee delivered by a hotel employee, she sat back and looked out over the city of Dallas, her mind on Alec and what to say to him before she left. It would be painful to say goodbye. She loved him so much. But she would not be one of those women who clung to men who didn’t want them. Leaving was the right thing to do. The only thing to do. Maybe he’d stop by and say hello if his business ever brought him back to the area. The tears welled in her eyes but she forced them back. This time, for Alec, she had to be strong.
By late afternoon she needed a new space. She was not used to sitting idle. Around two, Alec called to explain he would be tied up for a while longer. She assured him there was no hurry and went out to explore the hotel on her own.
With a soft ding, the elevator door opened to the marbled lobby. Stepping out, she immediately noticed a large flat-screen television mounted on the wall behind the concierge’s stand. It listed the various shops and meeting rooms and the locations of each. Beneath the Presidential Suite, one name stood out: Morreston.
A chill ran down her spine. Could this be the meeting Alec had mentioned about the development of the ranch? Without any conscious thought, she began making her way in that direction. After rounding the far corner, she took a small escalator up to the next level.
The royal-blue carpeted reception area was deserted. Her hands clenched into fists as she walked silently to the meeting room entrance and pulled open one of the mahogany doors. Immediately she was assailed with the buzz of conversation. About forty men and women filled the room. Some held flutes of champagne while others sipped coffee. Most stood in smaller groups, nodding or arguing some point they were trying to make. But the mood throughout the entire room was excitement.
Stepping inside, she searched for Alec, finally spotting him in the far corner. Like the other men in the room, he wore a dark suit and tie. From the way it fit, no doubt it was custom tailored and probably cost more than the ranch. Surrounded by eight or nine people, his hands moved as he emphasized the point he was making.
The churning in her stomach made her feel queasy. This was it. The meeting. And these were the people, the investors, who’d put up millions to develop the Bar H, putting their faith in Alec to give them America’s grandest entertainment complex for their vested interest.
He was at home in this setting. So confident. So self-assured. These people were accomplished in their own right, yet they held Alec and his capabilities high on a pedestal, clinging to his every word. The more that realization sank in, the smaller she felt.
A white-jacketed waiter appeared next to her, offering glasses of champagne on a silver tray. She shook her head in polite refusal. What was she doing here? Had she honestly thought something good would come of the affair with Alec? And clearly, that’s all it had been. At least to him.
Her eyes fell on a large display table in the center of the room. She knew it was a scale model rendering of the future of the ranch. Strangely, she didn’t care to look any closer. It no longer mattered. Alec would probably direct the project from his office in New York. When this meeting ended, Alec would be gone.
Tears stung her eyes as her entire body began to tremble. Her heart pounded in her chest as she tried to swallow back the nausea churning in her stomach. She thought she’d been prepared to accept the eventuality of his leaving and say goodbye with an understanding smile, keeping the agony of regret hidden deep inside. She hadn’t foreseen that the pain of losing him would be so horrific. Now she had to wonder how she would ever get through this.
Feeling lost in the din of voices, she took one last glance toward Alec. A man separated himself from the others, placed his hand on Alec’s arm and nodded in her direction. For an instant, their eyes met before the world tilted and the room began to spin.
Shea turned, making her way back to the lobby, away from the meeting room before her tears fell and she embarrassed Alec in front of his colleagues.
The elevator doors immediately opened when she pressed the button. As she stumbled inside, she heard Alec’s voice calling her name.
* * *
“Shea!”
His deep voice exploded into the hotel suite. Despite the emotions running rampant, her heart still responded to the sound of his voice. Hastily she swiped the tears from her face.
“They have it wrong.” He spoke to her from the bedroom doorway. “That scale model is not even close to what I intended. A few of the investors have a tendency to push things to the limit. What you saw is not going to happen.”
“It’s okay.” Shea nodded and began folding the few items of clothing Alec had bought for her. There had been too many harsh words between them, too much pain, too many regrets in the few months they’d been together. She hadn’t even seen the model. She hadn’t wan
ted to look. Alec had already told her the way of life as she’d known it was over. The old house burning down had underscored his point. Changing the scale model wouldn’t change anything. It wouldn’t change how she felt about him. It wouldn’t make him stay. She just needed it all to stop, needed this insane emotional roller coaster to come to a permanent end.
“It doesn’t matter,” she replied quietly, calmly. “It’s your land. You can do with it whatever you want.”
“Shea—”
She shook her head and forced a smile as she placed the remaining personal items in the small designer sack that would serve as a suitcase, holding all she had left in the world. Lifting it from the bed and pasting on a brave smile, she turned to face Alec. “Congratulations on your project. I mean that. I’m sure your venture will be a huge success. Your investors have confidence in you. They know you’re the best.”
She had to accept Alec would be leaving and never coming back. She knew once this was a done deal, the restraints of the old lease over and forgotten, she would never see him again. Fresh tears threatened to fall but she determinedly held them in check.
“Someday, if you’re back in this area for any reason, be sure and stop—” She couldn’t finish. She couldn’t tell him to stop by and say hello. She had no idea where she would be. “Stop by Leona’s. She’ll know where to find me.”
For a long moment, Alec watched her. He opened his mouth as though he wanted to say something, then apparently thought better of it. For that she was grateful. The only thing left was admitting her love for the man who stood so tall, so handsome in front of her. But she wouldn’t do that. She would not push him from one awkward situation into another. She respected him too much to do that.
Then suddenly Alec moved, grabbing her arms and spinning her around so her back was against the wall. His lips were hard, almost cruel when they came down on hers. Hungrily, he took her mouth, consuming hers with a passion that threatened to devour her very soul. There was no gentleness this time, just raw need. And she gloried in the strength of him, the taste of him. She kissed him back with all the pent-up longing that had been tearing her apart for days, silently conveying her need for him. One last time. One final glimpse of heaven in his arms.
The thin straps of the dress prevented him from touching her. With little effort he dispensed with them and roughly pushed the dress to the floor. His hands cupped her bare breasts, molding them, kneading them, feeling them expand under his touch while his mouth continued to ravish hers. His mouth left her lips, kissing and nipping a path to her neck, then lower to suck the swollen buds of her breasts. She trembled, her hand fisted in his hair, holding him to her.
His hand slid down across her stomach, then lower, to the sensitive area between her legs. The surge of passion at his touch pushed her hips against his hand, confirming her need. Alec quickly removed the thin scrap of lace and stroked her. She moaned at his touch.
She heard Alec let out a low growl.
“I can’t go slow,” he rasped against her ear, his voice rough.
“I don’t...want you...to.”
He unfastened his pants just enough, then lifted her, positioning her to receive him. Without a second’s pause, he pushed deep inside.
His hungry mouth swallowed her soft moans as her body strove to accommodate him, to accept and embrace him and the heated force that drove him. It was as though he needed to brand her as his. If only that were true. She wrapped her legs around his hips, holding him to her as he began to move, driving any coherent thought from her mind. His muscles hardened as he pounded into her, taking her hard, filling her.
“Oh, Alec. I’m...” She didn’t finish the sentence, but he knew.
Grasping her hips, he pushed even deeper, again and again, until she cried out as her passion exploded. The final waves of her climax caught Alec in the storm of emotion and he followed her, pulsating deep inside her as he growled her name.
As the waves of passion subsided, she cupped the back of his head, smoothed the damp tendrils of his hair, kissed his neck and under his chin while he fought for breath.
“I love you, Alec,” she said softly. “Forgive me, but I love you.”
He raised his head and his eyes found hers. “Shea,” he murmured her name, then kissed her again, passionately, silently sealing the bond between them.
He swung her into his arms. Without a word, he carried her into the bedroom, placing her on the soft mattress. Quickly shedding his clothes, he lay down next to her, pulling her close.
Her head resting on his broad chest, she listened to the strong beat of his heart. She was still reeling from his lovemaking and the fact he was here with her instead of at his meeting.
“What do you remember?”
She closed her eyes. She didn’t want to do this. Not now. She hadn’t figured out exactly what to say to him. But she answered truthfully. “Everything.”
“Why did you go into the house?” His hand played in the fine strands of her hair.
“I...thought I saw Scotty. Upstairs. In his bedroom window. I thought you’d brought him back.” She pulled away and looked at him through the pale city light filtering into the room. “I couldn’t find you in all the chaos, but maybe if I hurried, I could save him. When I got to his room, I realized it was his stuffed owl that I’d seen from outside. As I was running back to the stairs, I remembered the chest. I thought I could save it.”
She lay back on her pillow, covering her face as the somber weight of total loss returned. “It was all I had...from my mother, the only pictures of my dad. After our wedding, when I folded Mom’s gown and put it back in the chest, I thought it would be a safe place.” Swallowing hard, she turned her gaze to Alec. “Why did you come back? How did you...? I don’t understand.”
“I intended to make sure you got out of the house before something happened. My timing could have been better. I was on my way back and saw the flames.” A rueful smile touched his lips. “I’d anticipated evicting you would be a major hurdle, but I never anticipated having to carry you out unconscious.”
She drew in a sharp but shaky breath. There was her answer. He had just eliminated any lingering hope. When Alec had asked her how much she remembered, it included his demand that she leave. And he’d just confirmed he’d meant it.
It had all, finally, come to an end.
* * *
In the slender moments before the light of a new day began to appear in the eastern sky, Shea made her way quietly through the suite and toward the door, glancing one last time at the sleeping man on the bed. He had come into her life so unexpectedly. But in the end, he’d given her so much more than he would take away. Now it was her turn to give him the freedom he needed to go forward with his life. And somehow, maybe, someday she could get on with hers.
Thirteen
The week she spent with Leona provided some time and space for Shea to try to work through all the emotions and grief eating away at her soul. Leona gave her plenty of room and didn’t try to encourage her to talk but made sure Shea knew she was there for her if or when she needed her.
Alec had called every day, checking to be sure she was all right. She’d heard Leona assuring him that Shea would be fine. It was good to know somebody thought so.
This morning, Shea felt the time had come. The day dawned bright and beautiful, and she knew she’d avoided returning to the ranch long enough. She had to take the next step in saying goodbye. Had to deal with the memories of when she’d been happy, her heart full of hope.
She thanked Leona for her offer to accompany her, but this was something Shea had to do on her own. With quiet understanding, Leona held out the keys to her truck.
The site where the house had stood for so many years had been cleared, all remains of the old structure removed and the ground leveled. Parts of the small path that at one time had led from
the kitchen door through the small back yard and out to the main barn were still visible. All of the various ranch buildings were intact. Only the house was missing.
She slowly followed the path across the yard and into the hallway of the main barn. The familiar scents of freshly cut alfalfa, leather and pine shavings filled the air. She stopped to stroke the silky necks of the horses housed inside. When she got to Ransom’s stall, memories flooded her mind and pain gripped her heart anew. The day Alec had ridden the spirited animal to the old homestead. The small campfire where they’d talked and laughed and shared the meal Hank had prepared for them.
The rain.
The night that had followed.
Forcing herself away from the stall, she ambled on toward the tack room. Before she reached it, her eyes fell on an object that looked incredibly familiar. Sitting against the wall on the floor was what appeared to be the old trunk. But that was impossible. It had been destroyed in the fire. Frowning, she reached down and touched the top, almost afraid it would disappear. But it was real. The marks of fire damage were apparent on the top and sides, but overall, it was in remarkably good condition.
Immediately falling to her knees, she pushed open the lid. A faint pine scent touched her senses. Removing the layer of tissue paper she saw the family pictures. How did they get here?
Beneath the photographs were her mother’s hand-embroidered linens followed by the two quilts bearing the initials A.H., and, finally, the wedding gown. She swallowed hard as she gently reached in, picked up the dress and held it to her heart. Alec was behind this. Somehow, he’d managed to save it all.
Memories of her holding the dress in front of her, trying to decide if she should wear it to their wedding, flashed through her mind. Tears burned the backs of her eyes. She was glad she’d worn it. With a sad smile, she gently folded the dress, intending to return it to the trunk. Then she noticed a loose board on the bottom. Frowning, she set the gown on the quilts and removed the thin piece of wood.
