by Zoe York
“What if that’s just who I am?”
This was a strange, deep conversation to be having all of a sudden, but as long as she was looking at him and not running scared… “I told you. I like prickly. But there’s a warm, loving woman inside you who I really want to get to know. And not just for a few days in Hawaii.”
Her pink lips parted in surprise and her eyes went wide. “I don’t usually do...that.”
“Relationships?”
She pressed her mouth shut and gave a little shake of her head, her dark curls spilling over her shoulders. “Not generally. My experiences haven’t been great.”
“Neither have mine.”
“But you aren’t prickly.”
“I’m cautious. Same shit, different pile.”
“You don’t do flings?”
“Not generally.”
“So what do we do about that?”
“We put on our swim stuff and hit the beach.”
“That doesn’t seem very productive.”
He laughed. “Wow. You’re so focused. Are you like that with work, too?”
She flushed and her eyes crinkled with guilt. “Little bit.”
He leaned in close. “This isn’t something that will be solved with a to-do list.”
“Everything can be solved with a to-do list.” She pressed herself a bit taller, and all of a sudden, their faces were mere inches apart. He could smell the warmth of her skin and the faint almond oil in her hair. Every cell in his body throbbed to pull her into his arms and kiss her, but that wasn’t the plan.
He shook his head slowly, taking in a last, deep breath of her before standing tall and moving away. “I love lists as much as the next SEAL, Mel,” he tossed over his shoulder as he grabbed his board shorts. “But sometimes we just gotta jump.”
— FOUR —
His nipple was pierced.
How the hell was she supposed to think about anything else now? Mel pressed her thighs together surreptitiously beneath the table and pretended to be more interested in the luau they’d been given tickets to with their upgrade.
Cade Duncan—good guy, Navy SEAL, probably a hero many times over—had a steel bar through his right nipple.
Her mouth watered at the very thought of it.
How had she never noticed before? Even though he was wearing a t-shirt now, she could still see it. Two little bumps, barely visible.
They’d spent an hour on the beach before dinner. She’d done her damnedest not to stare, all the while recording as much of the perfection of his body as she could in her memory banks.
Now they were sitting on the lanai outside the hotel restaurant, their plates almost cleared.
It was utterly romantic. A completely fabricated construct, but still… She could see how people fell for the whole thing.
Why her mother had been so excited to come here twenty-five years earlier.
She didn’t really remember much of her first visit to Hawaii when she was three years old. She remembered the plane ride. The forest.
Cheering. There had been so much cheering.
“Where’d you go?”
She blinked across the table at Cade. “Hmm?”
He gave her a slow appraisal before nodding to the dance floor. “The fire dancer’s about to start, and you’re totally zoned out. Do I need to take you back to the room and tuck you into bed?”
He did that technically innocent, accidentally filthy thing so well. Heat flashed through her torso as she pictured that piercing hovering over her. And the rest of Cade, too. She licked her lips and willed herself to behave. They’d get there when the time was right. When she wasn’t distracted with thoughts of her mother and painfully aware that Cade could get under her skin and into her mind.
“You want to stay?”
She nodded and gave him a smile. He held her gaze and that was filthy, too. It would be so easy to get lost in him. Do it. Move your chair closer and let him wrap his arm around you. Give in to the romance…
No. Romance didn’t happen to Melissa Vincent. She’d learned her lesson on that score—had to have it taught to her more than once, but she’d been young and stupid.
She should have learned it from the cautionary tale that had been her parents’ marriage, but instead she’d clung to her mother’s eternal optimism.
Vincent women were really good at falling in love. Too easily, too quickly—and for the wrong kind of men.
Mel had cured herself of that. With walls, as Cade had put it.
The thing was, she wasn’t a bitch (most of the time). She went out of her way to not let her wariness get in the way of having a life. She flirted. Danced a lot. Dated occasionally. Slept with the handful of guys that fit into the Venn Diagram of Mel’s Requirements: not looking for commitment; vouched for by a friend; nice shoes (or boots).
Cade hadn’t said he was looking for commitment, but he didn’t do flings.
Which meant…what, exactly?
“So are you looking for a relationship? And when was your last relationship?” she blurted out as the first fire dancer stepped into the open space.
He laughed and moved his chair a bit closer. “We’re on vacation from that question, remember? We’ll think about a date when we get back?”
She was pretty sure she was going to obsessively think about nothing else for the rest of their stay. “Just making conversation,” she mumbled.
“I like that conversation,” he murmured, sliding his arm across the back of her chair.
Not exactly what she’d imagined, but close enough that she wondered if SEALs were also trained to be psychic.
The dancer brought his hand close to the flaming end of the baton, then twirled, and when he touched the other end, it ignited. Mel gasped with the rest of the crowd.
“Six months ago, I went on a bunch of dates with a woman I was interested in. Our schedules never matched up, and when they did, we realized we were better as friends. Before that, I was on tour overseas. Before that…”
“Okay. So you’re not a serial wife-hunter.”
Another laugh, this one low and oh-so-close to her skin. “No. I’m not looking to get married soon or anything like that.”
“Why not?” She groaned. “No, ignore that question. That’s silly. I don’t care.”
“You sure about that?” His fingertips grazed her shoulder, bare because she was just wearing a thin tank top over her bathing suit, with her sarong as a skirt.
She was suddenly very aware of how she was nearly naked. How close Cade’s nipple piercing was.
Stop obsessing over the damn bar. She couldn’t help it. It was oh-so-hot and totally out of character—or what she’d assumed was Cade’s character.
“It’s human nature to want to know that a date has potential.”
She slid a look in his direction, but he wasn’t looking at her. He was watching the fire now whipping around the male dancer in beautiful, frightening arcs.
“I have no doubt that you have a lot of potential for the right woman,” she whispered.
He grinned, his face transforming in the shadows, then he turned. For the second time that day, they were close enough to kiss. “I think we’ve got a lot of potential.”
“We want different things.”
“Do you know that for sure?” He cocked one eyebrow in challenge.
Well, maybe she didn’t. “What do you want?”
“You.”
She swallowed hard.
“For more than a bit of flirting and maybe a night together.”
“How do you know that’s what I’d offer?”
“When was your last relationship?”
Six years earlier. “You’re very good at turning questions around on me.”
“I’m very good at a lot of things.”
“Like getting the girl.”
“When she’s what I want…yeah.”
“Is that what you’re doing? Is this a game?”
“You and your hoops, woman.” He grinned.
“Just relax. Watch the sexy guy toss fire in the air. We’re in paradise…let everything else go.”
“I want you, too,” she said quietly. She wanted him to know she wasn’t playing games.
“I know. But you’re holding yourself back for a reason.” His gaze rolled over her face. “We don’t need to rush anything, right?”
Blood rushed through her head, loud and fast. “Do you have a plan? I kind of need you to have a plan.”
He nodded. “I do.”
“And it involves me taking down my walls?”
“Yep.”
“That’s…a big ask.”
He smiled again and squeezed her shoulder. “Let’s just watch the show.”
— FIVE —
Early the next morning, Cade woke up to a face full of fluffy down pillow. What the hell?
Beside him, his phone was quietly vibrating his alarm. He went to grab it, but his hand was tangled up in slim, brown fingers. He blinked again. Pretty pink nails.
He was holding hands with Mel. With a pillow squashed between them, like they were high school virgins.
He grinned. Score one for the sweatpants. Handholding was perfectly acceptable nocturnal behavior. Kind of sweet, actually. Squeezing her fingers, he yawned and disentangled himself from the pile of bedding.
“Rise and shine, beautiful.”
Without saying a word, Mel pushed herself up and out of bed. Yawning, she stumbled into the bathroom. He went to the single-serve coffee brewer and made first one cup, then another. When she came out, he handed one to her, and she started drinking it black.
Still no conversation or eye contact. Just sitting, quietly drinking her coffee. It was entirely possible she was still asleep.
She was definitely still cute.
He grabbed his hiking clothes and got changed. When he came out of the bathroom, she gave him a more Mel-like smile. “Morning.”
“Need your coffee in the morning?”
“Coffee, tea, whatever. I’m not picky. I just need some time to process being awake before I start functioning.”
“Good to know.”
She lifted her trail shoes. “Now I’m ready to hit the road. Or the mud. Whatever.”
“Definitely the latter.”
They packed their bags with food for their lunch, water, electrolytes in three different forms, first-aid kits, and their phones. They left the mini tents at the hotel. No reason to carry the extra bulk for a practice go.
They were trying to replicate race day one as closely as possible, and the race would kick off after a light, catered breakfast, so they went to the restaurant who’d be providing the meals and ordered eggs and toast. Cade tried not to mock the fact that the race was catered. He failed pretty miserably.
“It’s just a logistics thing. Hard to carry camp stoves through obstacle courses,” Mel said earnestly.
“I don’t have any problem doing that,” he deadpanned.
“You carry a stove?” She gave him an incredulous look.
“A little brew kit, yeah. Gotta make coffee somehow.”
“And you didn’t bring it?”
“Nope. Because this is catered.” He winked, and she tossed a sugar packet at him.
“Don’t say it like that.”
“Make me stop.”
She kicked at him under the table, and he snatched her delicate ankle in his hand, tugging it up onto his side of the booth. She was so short that she started to slide forward on her seat, so he let her go. She was grinning as she scrambled back into a sitting position. “I’ll get you later.”
He couldn’t wait. This anticipation game? It was more fun than he expected.
They headed into the Manoa Valley. On the way, Mel explained what she knew about the race from online message boards. It was a distance event—ten miles in total, over two days, which was nothing in terms of what Cade was used to. But there were six obstacle components along the route, and the racers needed to successfully complete each challenge before being able to continue on.
“That’s why it’s a team event—so we can help each other.” She slid him a sly look. “You can boost me over the tall things, for example.”
He passed the more popular Manoa Falls entrance point and followed the directions to where the race would take place. After they parked and hit the trail, they quickly realized they weren’t the only race participants testing the terrain. Over the course of an hour, though, people began to spread out and soon he and Mel seemed to be alone as they climbed through the lush green forest.
Mel had told him about her training, but he was still surprised at her endurance. They’d covered almost two miles of winding, rugged terrain, and she was barely breathing hard. They stopped at the site of what they expected the second obstacle to be—a rope bridge.
“Piece of cake, right?” She grinned up at him.
“For sure.” He scrubbed his face as he thought about what would help her prepare for race day. “This is going to be one of those choke points, because each team has to wait their turn. So we should plan to stretch and eat here as we wait.”
There were five obstacles on the first day, three on the second. The way the route went, it was almost an equal distance traveled both days, but the race started and ended with a distance leg. The second half of the race on the second day was a sprint downhill to the finish line. It would be muddy and chaotic.
“Thank you,” Mel said, bumping her shoulder against his arm. “I’d probably forget to do that in my excitement.”
“No problem.” He pointed up the path. “Do you want to keep going?”
“Of course.” Her enthusiasm was infectious. Cade liked the physical exertion of a good hike as much as the next SEAL, but this was like a stroll in the park compared to what he usually did. It was hard to get excited about strolls.
Unless your companion was the most intriguing mix of contradiction and mystery and soft, sweet skin you’ve ever encountered.
There was that.
He cleared his throat. “We could get to the top of the ridge and then take the descent path down. That’s going to be tough on day two with all the other racers.”
Somehow that was the wrong thing to suggest. Her eyes narrowed and she tugged her lower lip between her teeth.
“Are you getting tired? That’s okay.”
“No.” She shook her head, not looking at him. “I just don’t want to do that before the actual race.”
He wanted to argue with her, but just like that, she was shuttered against him. Her walls had popped up their own walls. So he nodded neutrally. “Okay.”
She gestured for the map, which he’d pulled out. After looking at it, she pointed to an access point at the fourth obstacle that cut across to the descent path. “Let’s go that far, then over and down, okay?”
“Sure—”
Before he could say anything else, she was off, the map clenched tightly in her fist as she powered her arms like tiny pistons.
Swallowing an unexpected surge of frustration, he followed, giving her some distance. Just because they’d had twenty-four hours of successful flirting without any miscommunications didn’t mean she owed him any answers.
He wanted them all the same. He wanted to know what made her brow furrow like that, made her mouth pull tight and her eyes cloud over.
What had she called him?
An alpha male who wanted to take care of everything.
Yeah, that summed him up.
What was so wrong with that?
Mel needed to learn she could hand some of that shit off to other people. And maybe specifically to him.
— —
Mel didn’t bother to stop at the site of the third obstacle—a series of logs suspended over a ditch of water. She fully planned on falling off and trekking through the water to the other side, getting the passport stamp, and moving on. Nothing to plan or discuss.
Discuss.
She could feel the questions radiating off Cade. He’d trailed behind her for a few
minutes, then caught up with ease, but he hadn’t spoken since she’d taken off like a bat out of hell.
She hadn’t been subtle about her avoidance of the ridge at all.
How could she explain the feelings in her head and heart? They didn’t even make sense to her. She just knew that standing on that ridge would be a special moment, and it needed to happen during the race.
She didn’t care if that plan wasn’t logical.
Preparing for each stage of the race was smart. Leaving a good part of day two unrehearsed was the opposite of smart.
Her heart didn’t care.
But now her heart had some new and conflicting emotions banging around in there, too. Like a sense of obligation to the giant man walking quietly at her side. He’d been nothing but lovely since they’d arrived, and it was all for her benefit.
If she could give him more of herself, she would.
If he’d just fuck her, he could have that part, no problem.
But the other parts—the parts he’d as much as stated he wanted—she didn’t know how to share them.
Her secret hopes and fears.
She tamped down the anticipatory feeling of standing on the ridge and having that moment of long-lost connection, sensing her mother next to her. She might not sense anything. The ridge here in Hawaii might just be another pretty vista, like climbing in the foothills near San Diego.
“Turning here?” Cade asked quietly, breaking into her thoughts. He pointed at the narrow path veering to the left.
She nodded roughly.
“I’ll go first, okay?”
“Thanks.” Didn’t quite seem fair that after being cold and closed off to him, but she still got to stare at his butt. Karma might eventually catch up to her, but for now, she’d take a deep breath and enjoy the view.
This path was an ankle-twist waiting to happen, though, so most of her attention was on the ground and each careful footfall. But every time she glanced up, he was still as thick and broad and tight and perfect as ever.
Cade’s body alone would be a good reason to give dating again a try. Although the fact she just thought of him as a piece of meat might be a reason not to. But damn…he was impressive. And not only on the outside. Not having sex with him—at some point—would be something she’d regret for the rest of her life.
