“Maria, you smell amazing. You look amazing. I’ve missed you so much, mi amor.” He was kissing my shoulders now, gently pressing up against me, moving his hips side to side, rolling his hardness between my ass cheeks very slowly.
I turned around; I needed to feel his lips on mine. Our kisses became deeper, more passionate. Finally, I knelt down and slowly pulled down Enrique’s boxer briefs. He was hard and throbbing as I wrapped my full lips around him. He arched his neck, his eyes rolled in the back of his head, and his knees seemed to almost buckle under him.
“Dear God, Maria. You feel so good.” He helped me off the floor and laid me on the bed. Enrique kissed my neck and slid up and down on top of me, teasing me, coaxing my body to beg for his. My nipples were hard with excitement. He kissed them softly, nibbled them tenderly. I ran my hands through his wavy hair and stared into his big, brown eyes. They were so soulful and sweet, searching for answers in mine.
I didn’t have answers, but my mind was no longer running the show. My body was in charge now. It knew what it needed and would accept nothing less. I pulled Enrique down so I could feel his chest against mine.
“I need you, baby doll. I need you so much.” He kissed me feverishly.
“Make love to me,” I whispered into his ear. I needed to feel his skin against mine, his strength inside me, his body uniting with mine.
He entered me with all the passion and tenderness I’d come to expect from him. I felt every facet of his body and soul; every part of him was ingrained in my body’s memory.
We made love for hours. I couldn’t get enough of him. I didn’t want to waste what precious time we had on sleep. I had him in my arms now, but I wasn’t sure if it would last.
GABBY
I wasn’t sure if they had talked about it. Maybe they played “rock, paper, scissors” to decide who got to fuck me first. There was some silent understanding between them. Todd got to go first. He sucked on my pussy until I got wet. “That’s my girl, Gabby. See, this is going to be fun after all. Put the blindfold back on. We’re going to play a little game in a few minutes.”
I did as he said.
“Flip over, get on all fours.” The guys were cracking up like it was the funniest joke in the whole world.
Todd grabbed my tits and pounded me doggy style.
“Okay, now open up wide. Say ‘ahhh.’” Floyd shoved his dick in my mouth. Of course he was huge and expected me to fit the whole thing in my mouth. “C’mon bitch, suck me. Open up wider.” Floyd was thrusting deeper down my throat, pulling at my hair as he fucked my mouth.
I didn’t dare complain. I just said, “Mmm,” like it was the best ice cream sundae of my life.
“Dude, your bitch is a freaking porn star. You weren’t joking. You better hurry up, my cock can’t wait much longer.”
“You can have her now. I love her hot lips on my dick anyway.” Todd slowly came out of me, and within seconds Floyd was behind me, his hands around my sides, holding me, getting ready to have his turn.
He entered me too fast and hurt me even though I was still wet from Todd. As horrific as Todd was for putting me through this, he did still have a sort of gentleness when he was inside of me, which I couldn’t understand for the life of me.
Todd said he needed to get a drink, but I think he just didn’t want to watch his friend drilling me. I didn’t want him to leave the room. I felt safer with him there, but I was too afraid to say anything.
So I played along. “Hey, hurry back and bring me another drink, would you? My mouth gets bored if I don’t have anything in it.”
The guys cracked up, and Todd promised to hurry back.
Floyd pumped in and out, in and out. He grabbed my tits and touched them roughly.
“Your cunt is pure perfection. No wonder Todd thought I’d like a piece. This is going to be the best fucking night of my life.”
He kept pumping and smacking and squeezing, and I was very grateful for being drunk and knowing how to let my mind escape. At some point, I blacked out, and when I came to, I heard them whispering.
I felt like I was slowly coming back to consciousness when Floyd slapped my face a bit and kissed me hard on the lips. “Well, well! Look who’s awake.”
I opened my eyes and realized they had taken the blindfold off me while I was passed out.
“Time for the ‘guess who’ game.” Floyd was loud and drunk. “Here’s what you’re gonna do, bitch. You’re going to put the blindfold back on, and then we’re going to take turns pounding that pussy. Each time, you have to guess who it is. If you get it right, you get a point. If you don’t, we do. Whichever team gets to ten points first wins.” Floyd was so excited about this game I could feel his anticipation.
“Okay, what does the winner get?” I asked playfully.
“That’s easy. The winner gets to pick how we play round three. If you win, you can pick who, which position, etc. But if we win, then I get to have you any way I want, no Todd and no protesting.”
Floyd stumbled over to the bed, massaged my ass, looking at me again with his vulturous eyes. I felt sick again. The room was spinning; every hair on my body stood up. Floyd could see the panic on my face and the desire in his eyes multiplied.
Apparently, Floyd won the “guess who’s banging Gabby” game. I couldn’t keep track of who was slamming me, so I simply stopped trying to guess.
“Get lost, Todd,” Floyd demanded. Todd said he’d be in the kitchen, and I felt sick that he was leaving me alone with Floyd.
“So . . . Gabby, what should we do?” He was slurring his words.
I was too drunk and defeated to say much of anything. It took everything in me not to cry. I knew he’d get off if he knew how scared I was, so I just said, “Whatever you want, Floyd.”
His devious smile told me he approved of my willingness to submit to him. “That’s what I want to hear. I knew you’d be the perfect cum dumpster. Now, roll over like a good bitch.”
I felt drugged. I wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol, the trauma, or the memories of Uncle Gene flooding back. But in that moment, somewhere between the terror and the pain, I wanted to submit to him.
I flipped over, like he asked.
He rubbed my cheeks for a moment before his fingers slid down and started fingering my crack. “Your booty is fantastic, Gabby. You know that, right?”
I nodded. “Uh huh.”
“And you know what guys think about when they see asses that are this fine, don’t you?”
I was horrified because I realized exactly what he meant and what he was going to do. My stomach lurched, and my heart was suddenly in my throat.
I heard the pop of a top opening and the squeeze of the bottle. His fingers were wet and sticky with lube as he rubbed them on my crack.
“Just relax,” his voice slowed. “The more relaxed you are, the easier it’s gonna be for you. If you don’t tense up, my cock can slide in, and it’ll feel better for you too.”
He rubbed my ass until I did feel a little relaxed, half in and out of consciousness.
“That’s right, be a good little whore.”
I wasn’t sure if Floyd was saying those words or if I was transported back to my Uncle Gene’s apartment. But I felt calm, sleepy, almost drugged.
“You look delicious, Gabby. Now prop it up a little for me.”
I shifted my body so my butt was sticking up a little. He placed a pillow under my hips.
“That’s perfect, slut.” He rubbed my ass cheeks a little and then spanked me hard.
I heard the lube bottle open, and a bit dripped on my ass as he lubed up his dick and put a little more on me. He spread my cheeks a little, and I could feel the tip of his cock entering my ass very slowly.
“Oh my God, oh my God, Gabby.” His voice was low and guttural. “Your virgin ass feels so fucking fantastic. Jesus Christ, I need more.” He slid in a little more.
I gasped in pain and he shoved his fingers in my mouth.
“Don’t you dare scream, yo
u fucking bitch. If you scream, I’ll rape you like you deserve, and your ass will never be the same. Be a good little girl, take it like the whore that you are, and I promise I’ll be nice. Nod if you’re gonna be a good little slut.”
I nodded and he took the fingers out of my mouth.
“That’s a good bitch. Rock your hips a little so my cock can fit in more.”
I moved my hips like he said, and I could feel every inch of his thickness invading me.
“Ahhh, Gabby, your ass is so tight. This is going to be the best fuck ever. I’m gonna bang you all night long. Touch your clit, bitch. C’mon, do as I say. I promise you’ll like it. You do like it, don’t you? Be a good slut and tell me you like it.”
“I love it, Floyd.” I tried to sound convincing.
“Not like that!” He yelled at me and spanked me hard. “Say it like you mean it. Tell me you love it when I fuck you in the ass. Beg me for it.”
“Floyd, I love it when you drill me in the ass. Your cock feels so good. Fuck me more, fuck me please.” I was moaning, pretending to enjoy it.
“Ahhh . . . yeah, that’s more like it, bitch. You are such a good little girl.” His dick thrust into me harder and harder.
His words and the searing pain sent me right back to my uncle’s apartment. I was reliving it all over again, losing my virginity, the way he moaned and breathed heavily on me. Calling me a good girl, telling me I liked it. With my mind no longer in the room with Floyd, I could block out the pain.
When I was transported back to the hotel, Floyd was straddling me, spewing cum all over my face.
JULIA
The next day should have been deemed a terrible day. I overslept and ended up getting to my first yoga class late. I felt out of sync during class; no one else seemed to notice, but I just felt out of sorts. Afterward, I was going to meet Liz for lunch, but right before noon I got a call from Arielle’s preschool saying that she was running a fever. When I picked her up, her face was flushed and she looked sleepy.
My first inclination was to be annoyed that my plans had changed, but instead, I felt bad that my baby girl was sick. I had been raised by critical parents; they were critical of me, of each other, and of the world in general. They saw everything in a harsh light. Ty was helping me to see things differently. Suddenly, my world looked brighter, and not just when I was with him. His positivity was rubbing off on me. My once empty glass was now half full. So I wasn’t upset that my day had been ruined. I was grateful I got to spend it snuggling with my best girl.
When we got home, I told her to climb into my bed and that I’d be right up. I made her a sippy cup with Gatorade and stuffed a couple lollipops in my pocket.
She perked up when I came back.
“I brought you some treats, sweetie.” I held out my hands so she could pick which flavor lollipop she wanted.
She pointed at the blue one. “In bed?” she asked, sounding surprised. She knew that Aaron forbade eating upstairs. I never really thought it was a big deal, and today, I decided to overrule the king.
“It’s fine, lovey. What movie should we watch?”
“Snow White?” she suggested.
“That sounds perfect, sweetheart.” I popped in the DVD and spent the afternoon cuddling with my baby girl. There was no place I would rather have been.
GABBY
At around 3 a.m., I woke up in a daze. It took me a few minutes to remember where I was and why I was there. Vodka was churning in my stomach, making it feel like it was turning back flips. I dragged myself to the bathroom and tried to throw up, but had no luck.
Floyd was passed out on the bed, and Todd was sprawled across the couch in the living room. I had to get out of there before they woke up and started in on me again. I grabbed my belongings and tiptoed out of the hotel room. As soon as I was on the other side of the door, I sprinted to my car.
I looked back, and thankfully, no one had followed me out. My keys were shaking in my hand as I started the car, and I sped out of the parking lot as fast as I could.
Steven didn’t expect me home until tomorrow after breakfast, so I couldn’t show up now, and certainly not in this state. With nowhere else to go, I checked in to the River Heights Motor Inn. The night attendant looked at me curiously, but what was he going to say? “Hey, lady, did you just get gang-raped?”
His sympathetic eyes told me he knew something was amiss, and he handed me my room key. “Here you go, Mrs. Smith. If you need anything at all, please don’t hesitate to ask.”
I thanked him and hung my head in shame as I walked to the elevator. When I was in my room, finally alone, I let it all out. I threw myself on the bed and started crying hysterically.
Actually, crying doesn’t really describe it. I was sobbing. My body hurt, my head ached, my insides felt like they were on fire, and my heart was shattered into a million pieces. No nightmare I’d had could have prepared me for how scared and horrible I felt. The worst part was that I had asked for this. I had wanted it. I had agreed to meet Todd, told him I had fantasized about a threesome. I was no better than a trailer park whore, and I deserved exactly what I got.
After two Amstel Lights and thirty minutes or so of body-racking sobs, I had to think clearly about my next steps. Sleep was the only thing that made sense, so I took a couple painkillers and curled up in the fetal position. The alarm was set for 8 a.m. so I could shower, have a little coffee, and be home when Steven expected me.
The alarm went off, but I don’t think I actually slept for more than ten minutes at a time. I woke up dozens of times feeling like I was being raped, over and over again. It reminded me of when I was a kid, and we used to go to the Jersey Shore Amusement parks. We would ride the rollercoaster over and over again, and those nights my dreams were only of rollercoasters, my body reliving the high and now reliving the trauma. Would I ever sleep normally again?
I showered for thirty minutes, scrubbing myself as hard as I could, trying to erase the marks of my real-life nightmare. I couldn’t escape the smell of Floyd’s cigarettes or of his putrid breath. I couldn’t brush my teeth long or hard enough to erase the taste of Todd’s whiskey. I was scarred by the semen that was adhered to my leg and matted in my hair. Maybe I should have gone to the hospital and done a rape kit. Yeah, that would have been funny once Todd showed the police our texts. No one anywhere would believe that I hadn’t asked for this.
Shampoo cascaded off my hair onto the shower floor, mixed with my tears and the DNA of those monsters. The evidence washed away in a matter of seconds. If only my memory could be washed clean as easily.
My skin was raw from scrubbing; no matter what I did, I couldn’t erase the memory of last night. I decided to dry off. The mirror was all fogged up, but I needed to see myself. I needed to see what I looked like after being fucked by two guys. Surely I would look different. I grabbed the washcloth and angrily wiped the condensation off the mirror. And there I was: the world’s biggest whore staring at me in the mirror. My eyes were hollow and my nipples were bruised. I hated myself. I had never had such loathing for anyone or anything as I did at that moment.
The bottle of Amstel Light teetered on the edge of the sink. I grabbed it and took a swig of its tepid nastiness. I started to walk out of the bathroom and peeked over my shoulder at my reflection in the mirror.
“Stupid bitch!” I screamed and threw the bottle at the mirror. The mirror shattered into hundreds of pieces. I barely flinched. “Good,” my irrational mind thought. I didn’t have to see that slut again.
I got dressed in my Miss Me jeans, J. Crew Cardigan, and leopard print flats. I slapped on a little bit of makeup and jewelry, and now I was back to being Miss Happy Housewife of 90210. I wasn’t hungry, but I forced myself to eat a protein bar so I could absorb some of the vodka that was wreaking havoc on my stomach.
I sent Steven a text to check in with him.
GABBY: Hey, how are things at home?
STEVEN: Great, how was last night?
GABBY: Good, tiring, I
’m beat.
STEVEN: Well, we’re off to church and then meeting my parents for brunch. Maybe you can go home and take a quick nap.
GABBY: Thanks, I will!
Now that was lucky, and Heaven knows I didn’t deserve it, but I was grateful for the chance of quiet at home. I sped back so I could relax for a while before Steven and the girls returned.
I unlocked the door and stepped into my fabricated “reality.” Toys were strewn about the playroom floor, and breakfast dishes were stacked in the sink. The scent of waffles and syrup hung in the air. Of course, Steven played “Dad of the Year” when I wasn’t around and had made the girls a homemade breakfast.
The dishes and toys would have to wait. I needed to get in my bed immediately. Roxie, our twelve-year-old beagle, came meandering into my room. She kissed me and wouldn’t stop. Roxie always does that when someone gets hurt. She wants to mend, to heal with her love. Amazingly, I wasn’t even crying yet, but Roxie knew. She knew me, and she must have felt my wounds from the inside out. Roxie would forgive me, even if no one else would.
I cried for twenty more minutes and then decided I’d better get up and make myself presentable. I took another shower and tried to wash away the tears. Would any amount of water ever make me feel clean again?
How was I going to face Steven and Kerri and Katie? Would “whore” be written on my forehead for the world to see? Cleaning up the kitchen and playroom kept my mind off my misery. Steven texted me to say they were on the way home. New makeup, new hair, clean house: I’d done the best I could.
Sex and the Social Network Page 21
