by Laura Iding
She swallowed a lump of disappointment. She’d known he’d planned to leave early, so she nodded and tried to offer a smile. “I know.”
Her smile must have been a little pathetic, because he stared down at her, his expression intent and serious. “I don’t want to leave you like this.”
Her heart swelled with hope at his words, and some of the pain of his leaving eased away. The expression in his eyes made her feel cherished. “It’s okay. I understand.”
He lowered his mouth for another searing kiss and she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him close, pressing her bare breasts against his chest. He plundered her mouth with his, igniting sensual fires that danced all the way down her spine.
His arousal pressed insistently against her hip. Knowing how easily she could stimulate him gave her a secret thrill. She thought he’d give in, make love to her one last time, but instead he broke away, breathing hard.
“I have to go,” he said with a low groan, pulling out of her arms and sitting up in the bed. He scrubbed his hands over his face. “I’m sorry.”
She couldn’t answer, a hard lump of regret lodged in her throat. She watched as he slipped from her bed, picked up his pants and walked fully naked into her bathroom.
The door closed behind him with a soft click and she squeezed her eyes shut, refusing to cry. Ridiculous to feel as if he was deserting her. After all, this was what they’d both agreed to. An affair.
Lust wasn’t love. How many times did she have to remind herself of that fact? This burning intensity she felt with Quinn wasn’t the sort of emotion that lasted through the years until the end of time. This was nothing like the love she’d shared with George.
Quinn was right to leave now.
She used the time while he was in the bathroom to get out of bed, dressing in comfortable jeans and sweater. She needed to take a shower, but that could wait until after Quinn was gone. She went into the kitchen to start a pot of coffee.
Quinn came out a few minutes later, pulling on his wrinkled shirt, which had been left in a heap on her living-room floor.
She strove to sound casual. “Would you like a cup of coffee before you go?”
“No, thanks,” he said, looking at her with sincere regret. “If I stay much longer, I’m afraid I won’t leave at all.”
She wanted to tell him he was welcome to come back any time, but knew that wouldn’t be wise. He was a man with responsibilities. She knew, without being told, he’d never stay over with her like this while his son was at home.
And how many sleepovers could Danny have without raising suspicions?
“All right, I’ll get your coat.” She brushed past him to head into the living room to pull his coat from the closet.
“Leila, I’ve been invited to Seth and Kylie’s wedding tomorrow evening on New Year’s Eve,” he said as he took the coat from her and shrugged into it. “Would you like to come with me?”
Her brows rose in surprise. Him inviting her to go out with him again was the last thing she’d expected. And as much as she would have loved to go, being with him might be a bit obvious. “I’ve been invited to their wedding, too,” she admitted. “I’m not on call that night, so I’m sure I’ll see you there.”
He stared at her again and then nodded. “I’ll look forward to it.”
Pasting a brave smile on her face, she opened the front door. “Goodbye, Quinn.”
“Bye, Leila.” He looked as if he wanted to kiss her again, but after a brief hesitation he turned and left.
She closed the door behind him, dropping her forehead against the cool, smooth wood frame and closing her eyes in a wave of despair.
Maybe it would be best to avoid seeing Quinn again as she was beginning to think she didn’t have the ability to indulge in an affair.
Not without opening herself up to a world of hurt.
Quinn had to force himself to keep walking away from Leila, down the step to her driveway where he’d left his car, when every nerve in his body wanted nothing more but to turn back, to stay with her.
He scraped the ice off his windshield with more force than necessary, and then drove home to change clothes, shivering in the cold and missing Leila’s warmth. His stomach churned and he wondered if it was because he was missing Leila already.
The house was eerily empty. The silence bothered him. He’d gotten used to coming home to Danny and Delores. Even late at night, he always knew they were there. Striding through the living room, he headed to his room and the adjoining bathroom to shower, regretfully washing away the lingering scent of Leila and their lovemaking from his skin. Images of their night together arose in his mind and he groaned, remembering her touch as he soaped his body.
He had to stop torturing himself like this. Obviously one night with Leila wasn’t enough. She was still firmly lodged in his system, and he was unable to shake her loose.
He should have been fine. A night full of steamy, immensely satisfying sex should have been enough to dull the edge of need.
So why did he feel as if he’d never have enough?
Shaking his head at his folly, he turned off the shower and dried off before searching for clean clothes to wear. His stomach didn’t feel so good and, thinking he was hungry, he ate a bowl of cold cereal before calling Seth to make sure everything was fine with Danny.
Seth answered cheerfully, reassuring Quinn that all was fine. He promised to have Danny ready to go by the time Quinn got there.
After hanging up with Seth, he called the hospital. He had to wait a few minutes to be connected to Delores’s room, but then she answered the phone. “Hello?”
“Delores, it’s Quinn. How are you feeling?”
“Good. Anxious to get out of here.”
“Great.” He was glad to hear she sounded like her old self. The flu bug must only last twenty-four hours. “I’ll pick up Danny first, and then we’ll be out to pick you up.”
“Okay, but you haven’t forgotten about Danny’s therapist appointment this morning, have you?” Delores asked anxiously. “Dr. Adams is expecting him at ten-thirty.”
With a guilty start he glanced at the calendar posted on the fridge. He had forgotten. Delores was usually the one who took Danny to his appointments, although he’d met with Nancy himself when they’d first arrived in Cedar Bluff. Danny usually met with her twice a week but, considering this was the week between Christmas and New Year, Nancy had requested to cut back to just one day. Today. “I’ll get him to the clinic, don’t worry.”
“All right, if you’re sure.”
He was sure they’d be cutting it close if Delores wasn’t ready to be discharged by the time he arrived at the hospital. On the way to Seth’s he called Michael Hendricks to explain the situation.
“I’ll have everything ready to go,” Michael promised. “Her discharge paperwork will be complete and I’ll have the nurses help her get dressed right now, so there won’t be any delay.”
“Thanks.” Grateful for Michael’s understanding, he hung up the phone and stood, feeling worse than before. Since his appetite had vanished, he gave up on the cold cereal, dumping the remains in the sink. His head and his stomach hurt and he figured he wouldn’t be himself until he had Danny and Delores back home where they both belonged.
Pulling his coat back on, he headed over to pick up Danny. Danny was obviously excited about his sleepover, his fingers flying through sign language that Quinn had trouble keeping up with as he navigated the road. At times like this he would have given anything to hear the chatter of Danny’s voice.
“You beat Ben how many times?” he asked, trying to follow Danny’s convoluted sentences. “Seven?”
Danny gave an exasperated sigh and tried again.
“Oh, sorry. Five times. That’s amazing. I’m glad you had fun.”
How is Auntie D. doing?
“Great. We’re picking her up from the hospital now, and then we’ll take her home. You have a doctor’s appointment with Dr. Adams at ten-thirty.”
“What’s wrong?” he asked, a little concerned. “I thought you liked going to see her.”
Danny shrugged and then launched into another sign-language discussion about the games he and Ben had played.
Quinn parked in the doctors’ parking lot and they walked inside. His legs felt heavy, like they were filled with lead, probably a result of his late night and very little sleep. His head still ached and his stomach didn’t feel great either. The cold cereal he’d eaten earlier sloshed uncomfortably in his gut.
His fault, though, for keeping Leila up half the night making love to her, so he wasn’t going to complain. Good thing he had the day off, though. The way he felt right now, he wouldn’t be able to work.
He and Danny rode the elevator to the fourth floor, finding Delores in her room, dressed and ready to go as promised.
In no time at all, Quinn had Delores and Danny bundled up in his car and was heading home. Inside, he made sure Delores was settled comfortably in her room before hustling Danny back out for his doctor’s appointment.
“Wait, what about lunch?” Delores asked as he started to leave.
“I’ll take Danny out for lunch, you just rest.”
“All right,” she said with a huff, settling back in her bed. “But I’m not an invalid, you know.”
“Of course you aren’t.” He barely refrained from rolling his eyes in disgust. What part of having the flu and a subsequent mild heart attack didn’t she understand? Sure, she wasn’t an invalid, but she wasn’t Superwoman either.
He flipped through several magazines as he sat in the small room, waiting for Danny to finish with Nancy Adams. When she saw him there with Danny, she’d agreed to talk to him after the appointment to bring him up to speed on Danny’s progress.
Quinn’s head throbbed painfully, causing the words to go blurry at times. And the sick feeling in his stomach persisted. Was he hungry? Food didn’t necessarily appeal, but then again he hadn’t eaten much that morning or the night before.
Ignoring his discomfort, he tried to concentrate on the magazine article he was reading. It was an article about a young man who’d been adopted and had eventually been reunited with his birth parents.
The article reminded him of Leila. After the night of intimacy they’d spent together, he still didn’t know very much about her. Was she trying to find her birth parents, too? He tore the article out of the magazine and folded it up into his pocket so he could give it to her when he saw her again.
“Dr. Torres?”
He glanced up to see Nancy Adams standing there next to Danny. He hastily rose to his feet, hiding a flash of dizziness. “Yes?”
“We’re finished. Danny, have a seat here for a few minutes while I talk to your dad, all right?”
Danny nodded and crutch-walked over to the table full of children’s books. He picked one out and settled down to read.
Feeling somewhat apprehensive, Quinn followed Nancy Adams into her office. “So, how is Danny doing?”
She pursed her lips a bit as she sat down across from him. “Actually, I wanted to ask how you were doing first.”
“Me?” He was taken aback by her question. “I’m fine. Why would you think there’s something wrong? Did Danny say something?”
“No, Danny didn’t say anything. But you lost your wife, Dr. Torres, at the same time Danny lost his mother. Doesn’t that give me the right to ask how you’re doing?”
He shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “Yes, I suppose so, but I really am fine. That last year with Celeste was very difficult. I know her illness was partially my fault, but I’ve accepted it and have moved on. It’s Danny who concerns me. It’s been eighteen months and he still hasn’t said a word.”
Nancy Adams was an attractive woman in her late fifties, but the way she looked at him now, so intently, he wondered if she could see through him, all the way to the depths of his soul. Did she suspect he’d spent the night in Leila’s arms? Did moving on from the nightmare with Celeste make him a bad person?
“Danny is doing very well,” she said finally, dropping the subject of him for the moment. “Today, in particular, he seemed more animated than usual.”
Quinn nodded. “He spent the night with a friend last night, and I must admit I’ve never seen him so excited either.”
“Danny really has been making progress with his friends, and I think for the first time in a long time he’s finding his lack of speech a barrier. A few times I’ve caught him looking very frustrated, as if he wanted to blurt something out.”
A shiver of excitement raced through him. “That’s good news.”
“Yes. As I’ve said before, Danny will speak again when he’s ready. You’re raising a very well-adjusted child. Whatever you’re doing,” she added with a gentle smile, “keep it up.”
Like making love with Leila? No, she meant with Danny. Getting Danny involved more with his classmates. Like the sledding trip and this most recent sleepover. Being home more with his son. Keeping their small family intact. “I will.”
“Good. We’ll start back up with his twice-a-week schedule on Tuesdays and Thursdays next week.”
“All right.” Quinn rose to his feet and held out a hand. “Thanks, Dr. Adams, for everything.”
She shook her head as she took his hand in a firm grip. “Don’t thank me yet, not until Danny’s started talking.”
After his discussion with Nancy Adams, Quinn was convinced Danny would start talking again very soon.
He could be patient. And no matter what, he didn’t want to give Danny any setbacks. He didn’t dare introduce anything new into their lives at this point.
“Ready for lunch?” he asked, when he returned to the waiting room to pick up Danny. “We can go to whichever fast-food restaurant you want.”
Mr. Burger? Danny asked.
“Sure. Why not?” Quinn knew the local burger joint was his son’s favorite mostly because of the giant indoor play area.
Because the kids were all off school this week, the place was packed. He found a seat near the play area, so he could keep an eye on Danny, who scoffed his food in record time so he’d have time to hang out in the play area.
Quinn stared at his burger, feeling nauseous again. He put a hand to his head, surprised to find he was sweating. What in the heck was wrong with him? Losing sleep had never made him feel this lousy.
Whatever it was, he needed to get home, so he wouldn’t be sick in front of Danny. He found the restroom and threw up the bit of food he’d managed to get down. After a few minutes he went back out to the play area to look for his son. The room swam dizzily, forcing him to grab on to the back of the chair to keep his balance. Light-headed, he blinked, locking his knees to stay upright.
He was damned if he’d fall on his face here amidst the horde of parents, a few of whom were glancing at him with curiosity, but he needed to get home. Soon.
“Danny?” he called, forcing his voice to carry over the noise. “Come on, we need to get going.”
Danny’s face fell, but he eventually headed over to stand by his father.
Quinn was sweating profusely now, his clothes sticking uncomfortably to his skin. He didn’t understand what was wrong. He never got sick. Ever. He led Danny outside to his car, praying he’d find the strength to drive home.
He gripped the steering wheel in his sweaty hands and for a moment considered calling Leila to come and get them. No, that wasn’t fair. Wasn’t he the one who’d insisted they had no future? And now he wanted her help? He couldn’t have it both ways.
Turning on the car engine, he squinted through the windshield and decided the hospital was closer. His stomach lurched again. He was sick. He might have caught Delores’s flu bug. Maybe he just needed a liter or two of IV fluids to feel better.
He had to blink several times to keep the road in focus as he drove the short couple of blocks to the hospital. He was very careful, not wanting to cause an accident yet feeling like his br
ain was becoming dissociated from his body.
“Danny, we need to stop here at the hospital for a minute,” he said, pulling up to the entrance of the ED. His voice sounded far away, as if he were at the other end of a long tunnel. “I need some medicine. I think I have the flu.”
He opened his car door and pushed himself upright. His knees buckled and his head spun. He grabbed the car door to hold himself upright so he wouldn’t fall face-first into the slush.
He felt Danny scramble out of the car, hobbling next to him with his crutches. He wanted to reassure his son he was all right, but he couldn’t see Danny. Everything was blurry.
He wasn’t sick. He didn’t ever get sick. What in the hell was going on? He told himself to walk, to get inside the hospital, out of the cold, but his legs wouldn’t obey. Instead, he found himself sliding downward as his muscles gave away like flimsy straw.
He dropped his chin to his chest, fighting off a wave of darkness. He couldn’t pass out. He couldn’t.
Dammit, don’t do this, he told himself. Get up. Don’t scare Danny.
Don’t scare Danny!
With a herculean effort, he staggered to his feet. He took a few steps, but then leaned heavily against the hood of his car. The ED was only a few feet away, but his gaze kept fading out and all too soon he found himself sliding down to the ground once again.
“Daddy?” He thought he was imagining his son’s voice. But then it came again, louder, a shrill cry, just as darkness threatened.
“Daddy! Help! Somebody help my daddy!”
CHAPTER TWELVE
“DADDY!” The sound of a child’s cry distracted Leila from her patient. Then she heard the voice again, louder. “Somebody help my daddy!”
The stab wound on her patient wasn’t too serious or life-threatening, so she quickly slapped a sterile dressing over the area to keep it clean before stripping off her gloves and striding to the ED entranceway with Melanie, one of the ED nurses, following close behind.
