All the Reasons I Need

by Jaime Clevenger

  As soon as the words were out of her mouth, Kate wished she could take them back. Mo’s expression had gone from relaxed to confused to indecipherable. Whatever her emotion, she hid it with a chuckle that didn’t reach her eyes.

  “Okay, I get it. Look, I know you’re not excited about this room thing. If there’s a sofa, I’ll take it.” Mo’s tone had dulled. “I’ll try and give you as much space as you need.”

  “I didn’t mean that.” Space. Mo had picked that word deliberately. Kate thought of the night she’d told Mo about the opportunity in Denver: “I think this will be good for me. I feel like I need some space to figure myself out.” Her words had haunted her for days. She’d seen the change in Mo that night and the distance she’d instantly put between them.

  Seconds ticked by. Kate knew she needed to fix this before it went any further. She had to decide to be friends or she needed to get on a plane headed home. The first step was being honest. No games.

  “Actually salsa classes sound fun. I’d love to take a class with you.”

  Mo held her gaze for a long moment but didn’t say anything. Finally she turned back to the bulletin board. “I don’t know. Now I’m thinking I’d rather beat you at Ping-Pong.”

  Mo’s tone—back to joking—eased the tension. “How about this: one round of Ping-Pong and winner decides whether we take a salsa class together.”

  Mo didn’t hesitate. “I’m so beating you.”

  “You do remember that I’m the one that’s good with balls, right?”

  Mo laughed and the sound filled Kate’s chest. She looked up at Mo and saw the smile lines she’d missed. Mo’s deep brown eyes held hers. “I’ve missed that smile.”

  “Is that all you missed?”

  “Pretty much.”

  Mo laughed again. After a moment she said, “With Reed and Julia getting engaged, it feels right that we’re all here together—you know, to celebrate.”

  “You hate weddings.”

  “Not true,” Mo said. “I hate the idea of marriage. I’ve got nothing against a good party. You know, maybe this whole reservation mess-up is fate wanting us to spend time together. Rebuild our friendship and all that.”

  “We’re spending a week on a tiny island. I think fate is overthinking this if we need to be in the same bed.”

  Mo was still chuckling when Luis cleared his throat. “Okay, senoritas. You are all set.” He handed the card keys to Mo along with a resort map with their bungalow circled in red. “I hope you enjoy your stay. Bienvenidas a Cozumel.”

  “Gracias,” Mo said. She turned to Kate and bounced on her toes. “Should we come up with a secret knock?”

  Kate couldn’t help but smile. “You’re such a dork.”

  “Sexy dork and I know it,” Mo replied. She started out of the lobby, tugging her suitcase behind her as she did an exaggerated swagger. The result was one part ridiculous and one part charming. She looked over her shoulder and said, “Come on, slow poke. The ocean’s waiting.”

  There was no direct path from the lobby to their bungalow. Instead a maze of winding walkways led from the courtyard behind the lobby through a dense jungle. Broadleaf plants and palms grew like walls on either side and the space was filled with a buzz of insects along with noisy chirps of birds. Every ten yards or so a new path sprouted off the main one and a clump of bungalows came into view. After they crossed a bridge and another clump of bungalows, Mo stopped to scan the map.

  “I think we go left here.” Mo turned the map upside down and then looked at where the path split ahead. “Or maybe right. Whoever designed this place couldn’t have been sober. And the mapmaker was definitely high.”

  “I seem to recall getting lost with you more than once. Maybe we shouldn’t blame the mapmaker.”

  Mo’s mouth dropped open. “You better be offering to help, because otherwise…”

  Kate laughed. “Let me see the map.”

  Instead of handing it over, Mo pointed to a building on the map. “Here’s the lobby.” She traced one of the yellow lines. “I think we’re here. What do you think, map guru?”

  Kate had deliberately kept a good distance between her and Mo since they’d left the lobby. Straining to see the map from two feet away was awkward, so she moved one step closer and leaned over Mo’s arm. As soon as she caught a hint of Mo’s musky cologne, the impulse to take a deep breath was impossible to ignore. Her body was doing her no favors.

  A mess of rectangles, wavy lines, and triangles taunted her. All she wanted to do was reach for Mo. How was she possibly going to sleep in the same bed?

  “So, right or left?”

  She looked up from the map and realized Mo was squinting at her.

  “You okay?”

  “I’m fine. Where was the lobby again?”

  “Here.” Mo pointed to one of the rectangles and then eyed Kate again. “Maybe you’re dehydrated. We’re a lot closer to the equator and the sun can really get to you.”

  “I’m not dehydrated.” Distracted, yes. And she was already tired of her mind’s refrain: Mo has a girlfriend. She’s not interested.

  “Maybe we should find some water anyway. Or maybe something with a little umbrella in it.”

  Something with a little umbrella would be dangerous at the moment. Kate tried to concentrate. “This place has five swimming pools. Five swimming pools but no extra bungalows.”

  “I really don’t mind sharing. I think this is going to be fun.”

  Kate sighed. “I just feel like an idiot for getting the dates wrong.”

  “But I get to feel like I saved the day.” Mo puffed up her chest, looking every bit the dashing hero.

  Kate rolled her eyes. “Let’s say that was my plan all along.” Mo being sweet and trying to take care of her wasn’t going to make this week any easier. She eyed the map again. “Okay, according to this, the spa is next to our bungalow.”

  “After that flight, I could use a massage.”

  “Me too,” Kate agreed.

  “You’re in luck,” a woman’s voice behind them said. “They’re running a special on couples massage.”

  Kate turned around. A shock of red hair and a perfect smile met her gaze. The woman was wearing a pair of army green capris and a white tank top that showed off her sculpted arms. From the wrists up, her skin was covered with a heavy coating of colorful tattoos.

  “I’m Terri.” She stuck out her hand. “You two are Kate and Mo, right? Julia told me all about you.”

  Julia had mentioned that one of Reed’s doctor friends would be joining them, but she had neglected to mention that she was a hot femme. By the long look she was giving Mo, there was no question that she was gay.

  Kate shook Terri’s hand as she introduced herself, though she doubted that was necessary. If Julia had told Terri about them, she’d probably included the details that Mo was tall, black, athletic, and androgynous while Kate was six inches shorter, white, and, by Julia’s description, a very much cis-gendered blonde.

  Mo held the map out for Terri to point out the hot tubs and the spa. Terri was explaining something about the massages and Kate felt a spark of jealousy. She knew Mo wasn’t looking for a date and she certainly wasn’t the type to cheat, but Terri was flirting hardcore. She had half a mind to tell Terri to tone it down.

  “Two-for-one’s a good deal,” Terri finished, interrupting Kate’s thoughts. “Since I’m here alone, I thought I’d practice my pickup lines. I mean, who can pass up a BOGO?”

  “For real,” Mo said.

  Kate forced a smile. Everyone flirted with Mo. It was a matter of course. But when she looked over at Mo, she realized that Mo was looking back at her, not Terri.

  “I’m game for a couples massage,” Mo said. “What do you think?”

  Kate ran through a list of possible answers. No way was she signing up for a massage with Mo, but she needed an out that wouldn’t raise suspicion. “I think you wouldn’t have any trouble finding someone to be your better half.”

  Mo lau
ghed. “Damn, that’s low.”

  Terri looked from Mo to Kate. “You two must know each other pretty well.”

  “Sometimes too well,” Kate agreed.

  “But apparently not well enough to strip down and let someone rub massage oil on us at the same time,” Mo added.

  Kate knew Mo was trying to goad her. She decided to one-up her: “Are you going to dare me? I’m not scared of a little massage oil.”

  “If it was a dare, would you say yes?”

  “I’d want to know the parameters first,” Kate returned. Mo held her gaze. Every time she tried to out-tease Mo, it backfired, but this time she wanted to risk it.

  “Good call,” Terri said. “Like what do you win exactly? Is a happy ending involved?”

  Mo held up her hand. “Okay, that might have been one step too far.”

  Terri winked at Kate. “Looks like we called her bluff. On that note, I’ll let you two get settled. I think the plan is for us all to meet up for dinner to celebrate Julia and Reed’s engagement, but I’m sure we’ll run into each other again before then.”

  Mo watched until Terri had disappeared beyond the bend in the path. “She seems nice.”

  “She’s friendly, that’s for sure.”

  Mo looked sideways at her. “You don’t like her? According to Reed, Terri’s brilliant. A pediatric internist or something like that. She treated Carly when she was so sick. And she’s into triathlons. Travels all over to compete. You two would make a good match.”

  “She was flirting with you—not me.”

  “So you’re not interested?” Mo pressed.

  “Unlike you, I’m not into every woman I see.”

  “Hmm. Your loss.” Mo grinned. “So did we decide on right or left?”

  Kate crumpled the map. “Let’s try left. We’ll either find the bungalow or we’ll run into a bar.”

  “Perfect. After we settle in, I want to go swimming.” Mo maneuvered her rolling suitcase around the curve. “I wonder when they’ll find your suitcase. You pack any pajamas in that little carry-on?”

  Kate stopped walking and hastily called to mind all the steps she’d gone through in her decision process for allocating items to her suitcase and the carry-on. “Dammit.”

  “No pj’s?”

  Aside from a pair of underwear and a bathing suit, she’d packed all her other clothes in the suitcase that was probably still on a runway in Dallas, where they had switched planes. “Can you loan me some?”

  “I don’t wear pajamas. They say you sleep better naked.”

  “Does that line usually work?”

  Mo looked back at her. “You’d be surprised.”

  “With you, nothing would surprise me.”

  “Careful, that almost sounded like a compliment.” Mo winked. “We passed a little bodega after we left the lobby. I bet they sell pajamas there. And I promise I’ll at least keep my boxers on. I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

  The thought of Mo lying next to her in bed in nothing but a pair of boxers didn’t exactly make her uncomfortable. She sighed. It was going to be a long five days.

  Chapter Five

  The bungalow was clearly meant as a love nest. Aside from the fact that the bed took up almost all of the space in the room and had a headboard perfect for gripping, the print above the bed was a geometric design in dark reds, oranges, and yellows that was conspicuously suggestive of two people having sex. One look and Kate couldn’t stop herself from thinking of how Mo was supposed to be here with her girlfriend. This was supposed to be their love nest. At least she didn’t have a visual of Chantal. She’d deliberately avoided looking her up online.

  “You sure Chantal is going to be okay with this?”

  Mo popped open her suitcase. “Yeah. Totally. Which side of the bed do you want?”

  “I don’t care. You pick.”

  Mo pulled out a sports bra, looked at it for a moment, then tossed it on the bed. “You keep asking if Chantal is going to be okay, but are you okay with this?”

  “Yes…but I want you to ask her.”

  “Okay.” Mo pulled out a pair of swimming trunks. “I’ll call her before I hit the beach. You coming?”

  “I’m going to look for pajamas first.”

  “Right. Pajamas.” Mo held up a T-shirt. “If you don’t find anything, I can loan you a shirt.”

  “Thanks, but I don’t think you want to see that much of my butt.”

  “You’ve got a nice butt. You could show it off more.” There was a pause and then Mo said, “I don’t mean that you should show it off in bed—to me. It’s just a nice butt.” She stammered. “But obviously it’s yours, and you don’t have to show it off to anyone.”

  Kate couldn’t help smiling. Mo’s comment about her butt didn’t embarrass her. In fact, in a strange way it took off some of the pressure. “So I shouldn’t buy sexy pajamas?”

  Mo chuckled and looked down at her suitcase. “No comment.”

  “I like it when your nerdiness overwhelms your coolness.”

  “You calling me a nerd?”

  “You have your moments, Math Whiz.” Kate was tempted to say more, but they had to sleep together later. The lines between friendly banter and flirting had to stay clear. She picked up her purse. “Call your girlfriend.”

  “Right. Will do.” Mo smiled. “Go find some super unsexy pajamas.”

  The bodega had plenty of sunscreen, T-shirts, flip-flops, and hats along with a disordered collection of brightly colored ceramic bowls and vases. There was a short rack of dresses, one of which caught Kate’s eye, but unfortunately no pajamas, sexy or unsexy.

  When she asked about other clothing stores, the young woman working the register gave her a confused look. She tried to get her point across in Spanish, managing to ask for a store that sold clothes to sleep in, and was directed over to a stand of pastel tank tops clearly meant as a cover-up over a bathing suit. Although the bottom hem made it to her knees, the neckline dropped low enough to be indecent and the armholes were large enough to show off a good amount of breast. Unfortunately, she didn’t have much choice.

  Along with the cover-up, she decided on one of the dresses as well. Until her luggage showed up, she couldn’t be picky. She paid for the items and then spotted Julia outside the shop. She’d paused to admire a beaded necklace hanging in the window, and the sight of her made Kate’s spirits rise.

  She tapped on the glass and Julia looked up.

  “There you are!”

  Kate stepped out of the bodega and into Julia’s hug. “Congratulations again. I loved the look on Reed’s face when you said yes. You two are so perfect together I almost forgot you weren’t already married.”

  “She’s asked me so many times that it became this joke but then I realized she actually had a ring this time.” Julia beamed. “I still feel like I’m floating.”

  “I’m happy for both of you. It really is perfect.”

  “Speaking of perfect—Mo told me you two are bunking together. How’d that happen?”

  “Not perfect and you know it.” Kate stuck out her tongue and Julia laughed. She knew Julia was only teasing her, but guilt settled on her shoulders at the suggestion that this was what she’d want. And didn’t part of her want it? “I screwed up and booked the wrong dates. Mo took pity on me and is letting me sleep with her but I know it’s going to be weird and awkward…”

  “You two need to reconnect—this could be fate.”

  Kate shook her head. “I don’t think it’s fate. I think it was me making a dumb mistake. And now I’m worried about Mo’s girlfriend. I asked Mo to call her to make sure she was okay with it. Mo insists she won’t mind, but I’m not so sure.”

  Julia seemed to consider it for a moment. “It’s not like you’re some random woman she just met. You’re old friends.”

  “And I really don’t want to cause a problem for Mo.”

  “Chantal’s not Tanya. I really think she’d be fine with it.”

  “What’s she l
ike?” Kate hated asking, but she couldn’t help it.

  Julia pursed her lips together. “Maybe the less you know, the better.”

  “Just tell me. Gorgeous?”

  “You know Mo’s type. Successful, confident, charming…”

  “And gorgeous,” Kate finished. What had she expected? In some ways it was easier knowing Chantal was perfect. Anyway, if Mo wasn’t with Chantal, she’d be with another perfect woman. Perfect wasn’t her.

  Julia clicked her tongue. “Maybe you two shouldn’t share a bed after all. I don’t think you need to put yourself through that.”

  “I’ll be fine.”

  “Okay, but if tonight doesn’t go well…we can squish the kids into one of the beds and you can have the other. Or we can lay blankets on the floor and tell them they’re camping.”

  “It’s probably good to have a backup plan.” Kate smiled wryly. “Anyway, at least now I have pajamas.” She held up the bag from the bodega.

  “I forgot all about the lost luggage! You sure you don’t want to sleep naked with the woman you’ve had a crush on for sixteen years?”

  “Very funny, Jules. Now show me your ring—I barely got a look at it earlier.” And at the moment she needed a distraction.

  Julia stretched out her hand. A gorgeous diamond sparkled in a platinum setting. The diamond wasn’t massive like some of the engagement rings she’d seen, but it was clearly an expensive cut and the delicate ring was perfect for Julia’s petite hand.

  “It’s lovely. Reed has good taste. Are you getting her an engagement ring too?”

  “She doesn’t want anything until we actually get married. And she’s not exactly the diamond type. I think she’ll just want a simple gold band.”

  “Or she could go with platinum to match yours,” Kate suggested.

  “We should bring you with us to the jeweler’s when the time comes.”

  “Shopping is definitely one thing I’m qualified to do.” Kate immediately began considering different styles of wedding bands that Reed might like. Reed was definitely the butch one of the pair, but Kate could imagine her wearing a diamond in the right setting. “What if you got her something little to celebrate before the actual wedding…a pair of earrings? Or a necklace?”