“They don’t have actresses like Loretta Young anymore,” Bernie commented wistfully. “The stars these days are all wusses. Where are the actors like John Wayne? Now, there was a man.”
He didn’t really expect an answer, which was a good thing, because Julia didn’t have one.
How she wished in their short time together that she could have gone to a movie with Cain. It would’ve been fun to find a show they could both agree on. Their tastes were vastly different, and finding a compromise would have delighted her. She could almost hear the negotiations and discussions they would need to have.
“What are you thinking?” Bernie asked, studying her closely.
Julia glanced down. Rather than answer, she shook her head to clear her thoughts. “Nothing important.”
Bernie didn’t buy it for an instant. “It’s that stubborn grandson of mine, isn’t it? I’ll give him a few days to settle down and then I plan to give him a piece of my mind.”
“No, don’t. Please.” The last thing Julia wanted to do was cause problems between Cain and his grandfather. It was difficult enough that Bernie had decided to join her for dinner. Cain was sure to view that as another betrayal and blame her. After Cain’s visit she’d tried to talk Bernie out of joining her, but he insisted she not renege.
Bernie’s frown betrayed his concern. “I don’t know what to do with him.”
“Let Cain be. Either he’ll work this out on his own or he won’t. The choice is his.”
Bernie didn’t look convinced. “Makes me wonder what I could have done differently when he was a boy. I did the best I could. Heaven knows I loved him but apparently not enough.”
Julia leaned over to hug the older man. “None of this is your doing, Bernie. I was the one who used Cain. He has trust issues as it is and I fed into that. This isn’t about you; it’s between Cain and me.”
“If he hasn’t got sense enough to realize you’re a good woman and he’s lucky to have you in his life, then he’s an even bigger fool than I thought.”
Julia kissed his weathered cheek. “Thank you.”
Her words were interrupted by someone at her door. The hard knock told her it had to be Cain. She glanced at Bernie and he winked at her.
Winked.
She paused the movie and then answered the door. Sure enough, Cain stood in the hallway and he wasn’t in any better mood than he had been the day before.
“Yes?” she asked.
Cain’s eyes went past her to his grandfather. “Despite everything I said, he came, anyway?”
“The decision was his.”
“Is that my fool of a grandson?” Bernie called to her from the sofa, although he couldn’t avoid seeing that it was Cain. “Of course I came. I didn’t pay that taxi to bring me here so you could talk me out of Christmas dinner with a beautiful woman.”
Cain clenched and unclenched his fists. “This is your doing?”
Bernie came to his feet, and seeing that he needed his cane, Julia grabbed it and took it over to the older man. He stood on wobbly feet and Julia helped him get upright by supporting his elbow. Bernie tossed her a grateful glance. “Growing old is the pits,” he whispered under his breath.
Cain stood stiffly in the hallway, watching Julia aid his grandfather.
“For the love of heaven, come inside,” Bernie told Cain. “You want the entire building to hear you making a fuss?”
After a moment’s hesitation, Cain came into Julia’s apartment and closed the door. “I told you to stay away from Julia,” he said, addressing his grandfather.
“Why would I do that?” Bernie leaned both his hands atop his cane.
Cain narrowed his gaze as he looked at Julia. “She’s not to be trusted.”
Julia did an admirable job of keeping her mouth closed. As it turned out, it wasn’t necessary. Bernie took up her defense.
“Julia, untrustworthy?” Bernie laughed as if he found the comment comical. “Because she didn’t tell you about the blog. Get over it, boy. Isn’t that what you kids say these days? Look at her.” He gestured toward her with one hand. “This is a good woman. She brought me cookies, came to visit me.”
“The cookies were a bribe.”
Julia raised her finger, wanting to remind Cain the cookies were the very ones he’d refused.
Bernie gave a disgruntled huff. “She invited me to Christmas dinner, cooked for two days to make us a traditional meal, one you’re a dope to miss, I might add. She didn’t need to do any of that. She has friends who invited her to their home and she could have accepted. Instead, she went to all the trouble and hassle of cooking for me.”
One look told Julia nothing Bernie said had fazed Cain.
“Furthermore, she’s got a good heart. You saw her volunteer to play the piano at Manor House. Took time out of her life to entertain others. And weren’t you telling me just the other day how she helped the kids put on a holiday program for the Boys and Girls Club?”
Bernie made her sound like a candidate for sainthood, but he wasn’t finished yet.
“There must be something wrong with your head, son.” Bernie tapped the side of his own. “Anyone with half a brain should be able to see the kind of woman Julia is. I know she should have told you about that blog thing and from everything she’s said, she regrets that and has apologized. You’re the one unwilling to forgive.”
“Maybe she should write a blog about forgiveness,” Cain fired back sarcastically.
Bernie simply shook his head. “I feel sorry for you if you can’t get over this, because it’s your loss, not hers.”
Cain turned his attention to Julia, his gaze holding hers prisoner.
“Now, are you going to stand there like a bump on a log or are you going to come to your senses and apologize?”
“Me apologize?” Cain flared and then coughed out a laugh as if he’d never heard anything more ridiculous. “I don’t think so.”
Julia stepped forward. “Would it help if I apologized? Again?”
“No.” Both Bernie and Cain answered at the same time in the same sharp tone of voice.
Julia flinched. Well, she’d tried.
Bernie swayed on his feet and Julia noticed that he’d gone pale. “Bernie? Are you feeling all right?” She started toward him, but Cain reached him first and gently led his grandfather back to the sofa and into a sitting position.
“Pills,” Bernie murmured, having trouble speaking. “Right-hand pocket.”
Julia reached into his coat pocket and retrieved the nitrate pills. She opened the container for him and he placed one under his tongue. Leaning back, he closed his eyes.
“Does this happen often?” she asked Cain.
He looked stricken.
“Should I call nine-one-one?”
Indecision marked his face. “I don’t know.”
“I’ll be all right,” Bernie insisted, keeping his eyes closed. “Just give me a couple minutes.”
Julia waited, half expecting Cain to blame her for his grandfather’s attack. She took Bernie’s hand in her own and rubbed it. He seemed to be having trouble breathing. Not knowing what to do, Julia looked to Cain, hoping he’d know what was best.
He seemed to read her mind. “Gramps, to be on the safe side I think we need to have the hospital check you out.”
Bernie adamantly shook his head. “I’m not missing out on Christmas dinner with Julia.”
“I’ll save it for you,” she promised.
Cain reached for his phone and made the call.
Julia sat at Bernie’s side and continued to rub his hand while Cain raced down to the foyer to meet the paramedics.
Bernie rebounded briefly, but she could see he was in bad shape. It seemed to take an eternity before Cain reappeared with the men from the fire department. The paramedics checked Bernie over and made the decision to transport him to the hospital. While Bernie was loaded onto a gurney, Julia turned off the oven and grabbed her coat and purse.
“Where are you going?” Cain
demanded.
That he would ask astonished her. “To the hospital.”
His response was a curt nod. “You can ride with me.”
For half a second she was convinced she’d heard him wrong and almost asked if he was sure he wanted her company. Smart girl that she was, she responded with a simple “Thank you.”
Not a word passed between them on the ride to the hospital. As best as he could, Cain followed the aid car. He was fortunate to find parking on the street and the two of them half walked, half ran toward the hospital’s emergency entrance, where the medics delivered Bernie.
As soon as they were inside, Cain approached the reception desk and explained that he was Bernie’s grandson and would fill out any necessary paperwork. While Cain dealt with that, Julia found a seat in the waiting room and anxiously awaited news of the older man’s condition.
It felt like hours before Cain returned, but it was actually only about fifteen minutes.
“Did they tell you anything?” she asked.
He shook his head. “Not really. The receptionist said she would call my name when the doctor has something definitive to tell me.”
The minutes passed so slowly and staring at the wall clock only made it feel slower. Reaching for a six-month-old issue of Good Housekeeping magazine, she flipped through the pages but was unable to focus. Setting it aside, she bounced her hands against her knees until Cain reached over and blocked the movement. It would have helped if they could talk, but as it was, Julia had to hold all her worries inside.
“He’s a tough old bird,” Cain said after several more tense minutes. “He’ll be fine.”
Now that he’d broken the ice, she felt free to continue the conversation. “Has he had these episodes in the past?”
Cain nodded. “A couple times. His heart is weak, which is why I moved him into Manor House. I can’t be with him all the time and this way the staff can keep an eye on him.”
They were quiet again and another sluggish fifteen minutes passed.
Julia released a long, slow sigh. “I’m worried, Cain.”
To her shock, he reached over and took her hand, holding it tightly between his own. The small act of comfort and reassurance nearly brought tears to her eyes. She swallowed against the building lump in her throat and she curved her fingers around his, holding on to him the way a kitten clings to the high tree branch.
They sat in silence for several more minutes. When Cain spoke, his voice was low and controlled. “I read your blog.”
Julia was stunned and froze, waiting for him to say something more. He didn’t. When she felt like she could speak, she asked, “Do you hate me more now?”
Frowning, he turned to stare at her. “I could never hate you, Julia.”
He said that now, but just the day before he’d looked at her with contempt when he’d learned what she’d done.
“Thank you for that.”
His hand tightened on hers. “You were right. I did find you irritating in the beginning.”
“I was trying too hard,” she whispered, thinking her morning chatter those first few days had been over-the-top.
“Perhaps I wasn’t trying hard enough.”
She couldn’t believe that he was sitting with her and holding her hand and talking to her.
“That last post, you wrote that kindness changed you.”
“Yes.”
He sighed. “It changed me, too.”
“Cain Maddox.” A male nurse appeared and called out his name.
Both Cain and Julia bounded to their feet as if they’d been shot out of a rocket and approached the man.
“I can take you back to see your”—he hesitated and looked down at the clipboard—“your grandfather.”
“Thank you.”
The nurse looked to Julia. “Are you a relative?”
Before she could answer, Cain said, “She’s with me.”
The nurse nodded and then led them both to the cubicle where Bernie lay on the bed. The first thing Julia noticed was that his color was better. The doctor appeared a few minutes later.
“We’d like to run a few tests, which will mean keeping him overnight.”
“No way,” Bernie protested. “Not on Christmas. Julia’s cooking and—”
“No arguing,” Cain chastised him.
“Don’t worry, Bernie, I’ll save dinner for you.”
“I’m not letting you spend Christmas alone,” Bernie objected.
Cain bristled. “Would you stop worrying about Julia? She’s fine. You’re the one with the heart condition.”
“Don’t fight it, Bernie,” Julia advised. “You’ve got two nurses, a doctor, and your grandson against you and I’m joining forces with them. Best to do what they advise.”
“But—”
“Bernie, please.”
The older man sighed and then reluctantly nodded at Julia. “Only because you asked.”
Cain’s face tightened. “I see you’ve got him wrapped around your little finger, too.”
Too? The implication being that she had control of him as well.
The doctor exited the cubicle, giving the nurse instructions, which left Bernie with only Cain and Julia. Cain’s grandfather studied the two of them.
“You talking?” he asked.
Julia waited for Cain to answer, and when he didn’t she did. “A little.” Then, lowering her voice, she added, “He read the blog.”
“I’m right here,” Cain returned stiffly. “There’s no need to whisper.”
Bernie rolled his head against the pillow and focused his attention on Cain. “You read it?” he asked, as if he found it hard to believe.
Cain folded his arms over his chest and nodded. “Is there a problem with that? Were they password-protected?”
“Of course not,” Julia assured him. “The reason he’s asking is because he assured me you wouldn’t.” Because she was afraid he might misunderstand her, she added, “I’m grateful you did.”
“Well, well,” Bernie said, grinning from ear to ear. “Guess my grandson’s still got it in him to surprise me.”
“Wipe that look off your face, old man. I still don’t trust Julia; nor should I.”
Bernie snorted and likely would have said more if not for the fact that the nurse returned. “Time to take you to your room, Mr. Maddox.” He glanced toward Cain and Julia. “If you’ll return to the waiting area, I’ll get your grandfather settled. Once I do, I’ll let you know his room number.”
“Thank you,” Julia whispered.
Doing as instructed, they returned to the waiting room and reclaimed the very chairs they had vacated only a few minutes earlier.
Once seated, Julia kept her gaze focused straight ahead. “I’m grateful you let me go with you to see him.”
Cain shrugged as if to say it wasn’t a big deal. “If I’d gone back there alone, Bernie would probably have kicked me out and asked for you.”
Picturing Bernie doing exactly that, Julia smiled. “Too?” she asked.
“Too what?”
“You said I had Bernie wrapped around my little finger, too.”
“Slip of the tongue. You might have had me at one time, but not now.”
“Oh.” She did her best to hide her disappointment. All at once everything was too much for her. If Cain had read her posts and was still unwilling to forgive her, there was nothing left for her to say. Afraid she was about to do something that would embarrass them both, she left the waiting area. Not knowing where to go or what to do, she walked down the hallway and paused, wrapping her arms around her middle, and looked out of the window onto the landscape outside.
To her surprise, after a few minutes Cain followed and came to stand behind her, his hands on her shoulders. Their gazes met in the reflection in the window.
He rested his chin on the crown of her head and exhaled a deep sigh. “I want to be more than the means to an end to you.”
“You already are, Cain, so much more than you realize.”
His hands tightened on her shoulders.
“Don’t you know how important you are to me, or how I feel about you?” Risking her heart and her pride, Julia turned and wrapped her arms around his middle, pressed the side of her face against his chest. “Didn’t my blogs tell you how hard I was falling for you?”
“No,” he admitted. “All I saw or felt was how quickly you managed to worm your way around my heart. I told you once I didn’t like the way you made me feel. You were becoming a necessity, and that shook me.”
“I remember.” She held that conversation vividly in her mind because his words could easily have been her own.
“I lied,” he whispered, kissing the side of her face. “I cherished every minute we shared. Everything felt fresh and new and alive when I was with you. I hadn’t felt that way in years. It intoxicated me. You intoxicate me.”
Julia broke away enough to look up at him, hardly able to believe what she was hearing. Her heart swelled at his words and she bit into her lower lip, fighting back emotion.
“I had a hard time believing this was real,” he continued. “I was convinced that sooner or later I’d learn this was all a hoax, so when I heard that reporter talking to you, it was as if I’d known all along that something like this was bound to happen. It was what I’d expected, what I’d come to anticipate.”
“Oh, Cain, don’t you know? Don’t you see?” She placed her palm against his cheek, cupping the side of his face. As she looked into his eyes, she hoped he could read all that she was feeling.
He took hold of her wrist and moved her hand toward his mouth so he could kiss the inside of her palm. “I am so wrapped up in you that I doubt I’ll ever be the same again.”
Julia smiled, her heart so full it felt as if it was about to burst. She would have said more, but the nurse came looking for them.
“Your grandfather is in his room now, if you’d like to see him.”
“Please,” Julia answered.
Once given the room number and the directions, Cain took her hand once more. Happy as she was, Julia felt like skipping.
Once inside the elevator, Cain worked his arm around her shoulders. “I should have held out longer, let you think the worst.”
Twelve Days of Christmas Page 15
