by Dee King
“Hey…” I hear Sebastian’s voice over my head.
“Hey…” Sitting myself up, wiping my face from the tears, staring at him.
“I’m sorry.” His voice deep and pure.
“Me too.” I say to him, moving my hand to hold his, giving a small squeeze.
Chapter Forty-Nine
Where there is love there is also hate…
For what seemed never long enough, I had spent the night laying in the water, barely sleeping. Sebastian had let me be; leaving me alone to make plans to send our parents off in a manner fit for only the greatest of gods and goddesses. Hearing the sweet noises my children were making, I run up the stairs to greet them. Finding them already being held by Colin and Olivia.
“Um, good morning?” I say, taking Atlas into my arms, then Ember.
“Good Morning. We came to see how you were holding up.” Colin says, tickling Ember.
“I’m fine, thanks for asking.” Nodding at him.
“Really? You’re fine? You don’t do fine, Selene.” He laughs at himself.
“No, really, I’m good. Guess we should head down to get you some breakfast, huh?” I ask the twins, like they could answer me.
The twins giggle all the way down the stairs when suddenly, I see my parents standing in the living room. My body turned into stone, not moving an inch further. My eyes switching back and forth to watch them both. I couldn’t move my feet, I felt as if I had truly become a stone statue. No words escaped from me, except for my mouth dropping open with a quick gasp, then quickly shutting.
“Dad?” Colin says behind me, moving past me.
“Hello Son. Hello… mortal.” He tries to embrace Colin, but it’s hard for Colin to embrace him back.
“She has a name and she’s my wife. You will address her as that.” Colin pulls back from our father.
“Yes, Yes. My apologies.” My father steps back from Colin, then coming face to face with me.
“Selene, we are here because…” My father’s voice cuts off as it ripples through the air.
“Because your father and I would like to speak to you privately.” My mother’s words were being heard, but my mind couldn’t comprehend them.
“Is this why you’re here?” Not moving, my eyes glance to Colin.
“No. Didn’t have a clue, I swear.” He glances back at me then watches my father’s eyes.
“Okay, well…” My mind was racing, my hands shaking as I held the twins, whom now both had arms wrapped around me.
“You may have breakfast with us if you would like.” Was the only offer I could give them.
Finally taking one step in front of the other I reach the kitchen. I hand Ember to Colin to put her in her seat as I place Atlas in his. This was going to be one hell of a weird breakfast today. Banging pots and pans around, searching for everything I could possibly cook, I begin with the eggs. Colin comes to my side, taking the spatula away from me smiling down at me. He was trying to calm my nerves in a subtle way. Beginning on trying to make whatever I could, no one speaking, not even Colin’s new love. She looked petrified. I don’t know if she feared me or my parents or this whole awkward situation.
“Selene, sorry I’m late but there was an…” Zack’s voice breaks the silence when he appears in the kitchen.
Turning around to see not only him but also Ian and Cato standing there with their mouths gapped open. Zack and Cato rush to the side of me as Ian stood behind my parents, pulling on his bow from his back.
“It’s okay. Everything is okay. You can stand down.” I tell them.
“Are you sure?” Zack whispers, not looking at me, but his voice drifting to my ears.
“Yes, I’m fine.”
“You’re never fine.” Cato says, and with that, I began to nervously laugh.
“You are most definitely one loved goddess.” My father’s words silenced everyone.
“Thank you, I think?” My voice trembling with another nervous laugh to cover my fears.
This was the most nervous I had ever been. Even with all that we had been through recently, nothing compared to this morning’s nerves.
“Who wants eggs?” Colin turns around with a skillet full of fluffy yellow goodness.
Colin was a good big brother after all, making his way to the twins first. I keep cooking the other food, keeping my back to everyone. Although, I can feel Zack standing very close to me. He was great at his job, watching my every move. He was becoming my best friend and I truly trusted him with my life. Everyone was being fed. Even though I tried to eat some, my stomach was doing somersaults like I was on a trampoline. Barely being able to eat what I was putting in my mouth. No one was speaking except for every so often someone would say, this is good, and yes, she always makes delicious breakfast. My heart raced hoping Sebastian would soon come through the door and possibly save me from having to do this with my parents. But no such luck. As everyone finished, Iris showed up along with the twins’ caregivers for the day. My time with them was coming sooner than I was ready for. It was now or never at this point, and felt it was time to get all this over with. Kissing each of my children then nodding to Colin that I was walking out back, my parents stood, as everyone watched. They thanked everyone in the room for a lovely breakfast time and began to follow me outside. My heart was racing. I knew they couldn’t attack me, but sometimes I wanted that more than speaking. That was something that came easy to me now. Not speaking to them was something that I did as a second nature. Fighting were the only words we had spoken to one another in what seemed to be a very long time. A lifetime kind of long time.
“Would you like to sit?” With my hand, I gesture to the oversized glass table outside.
“Thank you.” My father says, pulling a chair out for my mother.
Again, this was the most awkward situation I had been in and this fear kept creeping up in the back of my throat, making it hard for me to even speak.
“You have heard the news I suspect?” My father leans back in his chair, like he’s just a normal ole’ dad.
“I have heard something… Just not sure it’s believable.” My words cold.
“It is, that’s why we’re here. We would like to make amends for everything.” My mother’s voice sweet, yet insincere.
“You don’t owe me anything, as I do not owe you anything. We’re good.” I sit back in my seat almost mimicking my father’s position.
“Oh, I believe that to be the exact opposite of what we are.” My father points to the three of us.
“Okay, so what are we then?” I cross one leg over the other.
“Selene, now that you’re a parent you can see the struggles of all this life has to offer, and you can now understand that everything that was ever done was all for you. It was for you to become the goddess we knew you would be. We sit here before you, telling you that we loved you so much, that we did what was best for you.”
Letting his words resonate within me, it was always what was best is all he ever said. It must be difficult to always repeat the lies in his head, keeping track of what he had to say to me.
“Okay, great. We done?” I ask them, uncrossing my legs.
“No, no we aren’t done, yet.” Hera leans over, placing a hand in front of me, trying to touch mine.
“What do you want from me? Forgiveness? Because you will wait a very long time for that.” A creepy smile slides across my face.
“What we want is for you to understand why everything happened the way it did.” My father repeats himself.
“I understand perfectly.”
“You do?” They both ask me, looking at one another.
“Sure. In some sick, twisted way, it was your way of making me who I am.”
“Yes, exactly!” My father almost cheered for himself.
“Okay, so we’re done now, right? You guys are free of all cares and can go live with your brother on the Island now, correct? You can tell Persephone hey for us too.” Now I was just being as condensing as they were.
/> “Stop it! You want us to die? That’s truly what you want?” My mother bangs her hand on the table as I pulled mine away.
“You didn’t even want me and you tried to kill an entire world and use me as the target so you could get whatever sick game you had been dreaming of to come true, and you want me to what? Thank you for that? Oh, my gods, you can’t be serious?” I exclaim.
“Dammit, Selene this is not a game. It’s never been a game!” My father’s voice echoing through the air.
“Oh, it’s a game alright. Always using us to be whatever pawns you needed, discarding us to the side when you didn’t need us; always making sure you were the winners. Always to be the ones who had control. It’s been a game since before I was born. The only part is, you forgot that sometimes you can’t predict the other opponent’s moves and you lose.” My parents sat there, no longer sitting back, but leaning very close towards me.
“You have no clue, child, no clue at all. You will never see the truth. Let’s go, this is pointless. One day you will see that parents do what is best for their children. You are exactly who we wanted you to be. But this is getting us nowhere, Poseidon. She will be just like him.” My mother pushing her chair back now, standing to her feet.
“Like who?” I stand up as she does.
“As Zeus. We wanted you to be everything he wasn’t. We wanted you to start a new way of life, and however we had to do that was how it was going to be. Even if it killed us inside and now truly killing us, all we wanted was for you to be the greatest goddess to have ever been. But I see that what we did was scorn you so deeply that you have no heart. It’s gone. Just do me one favor…”
“What is that?” Crossing my arms over my body.
“Don’t raise your children to be like you.” Her words cut me like a knife.
“Get out! Get out now!” I could no longer hold back how I felt.
Bringing my children into this was the last the straw for me. As I scream, pointing to the door, Zack, Ian and Cato come outside quickly, as two of them have their bows in their hands, with arrows pointed directly at them.
“Just give the order, and it’s done.” Zack says to me, never taking his eyes off my parents.
Contemplating this moment, seeing them scared for the first time in their lives, it became clear. I would never be anything like them. I shake my head no, and Cato touches each bow, pushing it down, shaking his head no with mine.
“We think it’s time for you to go, we will escort you out.” Cato says to my parents, turning his head slightly towards me, nodding that it was going to be okay.
My father turns his body very slowly towards me.
“We will be at my home when you’re ready.” He bows his head to me and then leaves hand in hand with my mother.
They all leave me outside. Standing alone in the quiet. Was there ever going to come a time I would forgive them for making the choices they had made? They say they did all this for me? Give me a life that I didn’t want? Use me to change a whole world to fear me? I guess they were right in one way… They had made me into this cold-hearted goddess I had become.
Chapter Fifty
When all hope is gone, where do you turn?
Another few days had passed, and I had yet to go see my parents. Sebastian urged me to please make amends so that my heart could move on, but something held me back. What did Hera mean by, ‘don’t raise my children to be like you?’ How dare she? She didn’t even know me and then to say that. The audacity of this …. This woman! At least I was raising my children. It was more than I could say for her. But it was something more, something was holding me back. Something that I couldn’t let go of…
“Selene, you have to go… it’s coming close to the time.” Colin urges me to go see my parents as we all are sitting around the house watching the twins play.
“Why do you keep pushing this? You’re as bad as Sebastian is.” Rolling my eyes at him.
“Because whether we like it or not, life is short, even this immortal life can be short, and you need to let it go.”
“Let what go?” I toss my hair over my shoulder, looking across the seat at him.
“The pain…” His words made the room go quiet.
“Stop, Colin.” Sebastian tells him, while his hand brushes against my leg.
“You don’t understand, she needs too, or she will never…” His words cut off.
“I will never what?” Asking him, getting disgusted with why this was such a big deal.
“Your heart will forever be cold if you don’t let all of this go. You will become a…”
“A what? Just say it Colin.”
“You will become a tyrant. You’re slowly turning that way now.” He nods his head as if I should agree with him.
“Go to hell, Colin. Who made you the judge and jury of my life?” Standing up from the couch, moving away from all of them.
“No one made me the judge. I almost killed our father for you, but you don’t listen. You won’t let it go. You will end up hurting more than just yourself in the process of all this.” Colin stands following me.
“First, I didn’t ask you to do that. Second, I didn’t ask for this life. You forget that. I didn’t want this, but it’s where we are. I refuse to let you or anyone else make me feel guilty for becoming what you all needed.”
“And what is that?” His words spitting back at me in anger.
“This! You all made me this! You wanted someone to rule, you wanted someone that would take all your hurt and pain and turn it into revenge. Don’t make me the bad guy. You wanted me to become this. To become the goddess who took on all that was happening to each of you. You made me this way. You never once asked me how I felt, you never once asked if this was what I wanted. I became who you all needed. Wasn’t that the truth? You cowered in corners leaving me to undo all that they had done. I stopped them from being killed multiple times now, hell, I stopped from killing half the people in this room, because that’s who I truly am. So, if you want to blame someone, you better look in the damn mirror brother!” Throwing up my hands in the air.
The room was completely hushed as anger grew deep inside of me. For so long, I had held back how I had felt. This wasn’t the way I wanted this to go, but it’s how it played out. Walking towards the front door, not turning around, I opened it with a wave of my hand and slammed it shut behind me. I find my Pegasus waiting for me. He always knew when it was the right time for him to be there. Climbing onto his back and laying my body down, I weep for a life that hides within me. Looking down at the Mount and watching all the people that I had kept there against their will was hurting me too. Flying over Christian and Chloe, I could see the pain in Chloe’s eyes through the laughter. She hadn’t been ready to die, she wasn’t ready for this life here. I was slowly turning into Zeus. Scorned by the ones I love and loved was making me become someone I didn’t want to be. The pain had to be let go and had to start today. As my Pegasus slowly lands down in front of the seeing room, I knew what I had to do.
Sebastian, please meet me in the seeing room.
Okay.
Being in this room was never something good to see, but maybe this time it could be. This time I was here to make it a place where I could find peace among this chaotic life that had been created. Sebastian walks in slowly. Hearing his footsteps behind me, I turn with tears filling my eyes. He embraces me, letting me let go of all that was hidden beneath the exterior I had created for myself. Slowly falling to my knees, crying out loudly, he held me while I sobbed. Holding me tighter and tighter as each tear fell. This goddess I had become, wasn’t who I really was. She was a shell of what I wanted to be. She was a product of the system that had surrounded her. It was time for a change. A change in who I was and who I had become.
The Life of a Goddess
Chapter Fifty-One
When you feel all hope is gone…
Sebastian and I had come up with a plan together in a short time as he heard me let out all my fears and dreams. He
was an amazing man, an amazing god, and I wanted to make him proud. But more than anything, I wanted to make myself proud. Wanting my children to learn from me, grow to become the leaders they were destined to be, and most of all know what true love felt like. This was my chance to renew my faith in this world that had been created by me. Recreate a better home, a better way of life, and a chance at a new beginning. It was time to let all that had been felt in my heart for so long to leave me. To become the goddess, I was meant to be. Be the woman that Elizabeth had raised, be the daughter my father had wanted, and be the child that Hera would learn from. To lead by the example that you can conquer your demons that live inside me just by trying. To learn from my mistakes and turn them into possibilities. This was my time to become who I was meant to be. Even though time progressed slowly on the Mount, it wasn’t going to slow down for our children. Earth was rebuilding on its own and it was time for the ones who wanted to be free to be that. Freedom wasn’t something that I thought I had taken away from them, but it had been. Keeping all these people here was something that Zeus would have done. It was time to let mortals tell the stories of the gods that had once walked among them. No longer a secret to the world. We would let them go if they wanted to be free. They would be back, but in their own time. Not at the hand of another. We couldn’t let the souls of the underworld be free, but we could let those on the Mount go. Even though some want to stay, I knew in my heart many would want to leave. The pain had driven me into an existence that I didn’t know. It had driven me to turn on everyone who cared or loved me. It was a driving force that kept me going for so long, that I didn’t know if I would ever fully recover this black heart that I had created. It would heal in time, I saw that now. But for the longest time, it was all I had. For what seemed to be a lifetime I had to learn what life and love was supposed to be, not what I had imagined it to be. Maybe I had read to many romance novels? Thinking that love was supposed to be the cure all to my needs. Love was hard. Love is what drove so many away from each other. And in the end, it caused more pain than love had ever deserved credited for. There was going to come a day when I would have to let my children learn on their own. The fear of them becoming like me was very real. That’s not what I wanted. They were to be so much more than a broken-hearted shell of a person. They would know that love does conquer the world, it conquers your world. Free to love and let go of all that surrounds you, even when you’re hurt. That will be the hardest lesson to teach them and myself. As Sebastian will close one door, we will open another one. A door to find ourselves in this chaos we had made, and to find what life was truly worth living for. But for now, we will start with something small. Freedom to all who want it. That was and will be forever how I repay for some of the pain that has been caused to many made by a few. And in years from now when I hear them tell stories of the gods that walked among them, that is when it will all become clear. Until that day, we will work hard to let them know they will not be forgotten. They didn’t die in vain… and they were worth the fight.
