by Kahele, J
“Yes, he gave it to me this morning, isn’t it beautiful?” I told her proudly. The expression left her face as she stared down at it. She seemed almost angry.
“What’s wrong?” I asked, a little shocked by her reaction.
She exhaled. “I’m just worried about you,” she said as she sat down in the chair.
“Why?”
“That man, your boyfriend…I mean fiancé, he doesn’t have a good reputation.” It wasn’t a secret that Chain was once known as a man who used women for his sexual needs. The whole world practically knew it. The tabloids made sure of it, so her statement didn’t surprise me one bit.
I laughed as I took a big swig of coffee “Yes. I know he was quite the lady’s man before we were together.”
Her face turned cold, distant. “And you went out with him anyways?”
I shrugged. “It wasn’t exactly like that. When I met Chain, I had just ended a four-year relationship and wasn’t looking to get back into anything. In the beginning, we would just hook up.”
Her eyebrow rose. “For sex?”
I blushed. It was the truth, but I was still embarrassed by it. I downed the rest of the coffee in the cup before saying, “Yes. I mean that’s all it was in the beginning. But then it grew into more and now he is the love of my life and I wouldn’t change it for the world.” A yawn slipped from my lips. She went to say something when I heard the scuffle of shoes and looked up to see Chain standing near the door. I glanced down at his hand and saw he was holding my cell. I must have forgotten it in my mad rush out of the house this morning.
“Thank you,” I said to him as I took the cell from his hands. His eyes swept over me from head to toe, as if he was searching for some sort of injury, a small spark of relief flashing through them as he noticed I was in one piece. The relief soon left him as his eyes darted to Lonnie, stilling as they glowered with an intensity I had never seen before, a mixture of fear, anger, hurt and worry.
His eyes bored into her, and you could almost feel the connection between them, a raw intimacy as she smiled at him with knowing eyes, eyes that a woman only had for a man she once loved, or still did. I suddenly felt like a trespasser, a stranger, watching the two of them, their eyes fixed tightly on each other, sharing such a tense emotional moment.
Clearly they were not strangers.
I swallowed hard before saying, “Do you two know each other?” I glanced at Lonnie and silently she lowered her head, shaking it. I turned back to Chain and he was gone.
I rushed out of my office and saw him walking expeditiously towards the exit doors.
“Chain,” I screamed out as I ran up to him. He stopped but never turned around. I placed my hand on his shoulder. “Why are you leaving?”
“I—uh, forgot I have a meeting.” I rubbed his arm gently and he pulled away. “I really have to go.” Before I could say another word, he opened the door and ran out. I was stunned by his actions. What just happened? I was tempted to run after Chain, but decided to question Lonnie instead. But when I entered my office, I found her gone. I walked behind my desk, sitting down, and reached for the latte that once sat there and realized it had disappeared too. Annoyed and irritated, I sat trying to get my head in order and figure out exactly what just happened. Most importantly, who was Lonnie to Chain? I suddenly felt tired, my eyes felt dizzy. I laid my head down on my desk.
I woke with a start and sat up, wiping the drool that was escaping from the side of my mouth. I glanced at the time and it was already 5:00. I was shocked. I could not believe that I had slept the whole day away. I stretched and grabbed my cell to see if Chain had called. Nothing, no call, no text. Since we had been together, Chain had a habit of calling or texting multiple times a day. So this was very strange to me. I dialed his cell and called him up.
It rang.
Rang.
And rang. When I finally got his voicemail I decided to leave a message.
“Hey, honey, it’s Violet, just seeing what you’re up to, give me a call.” I hung up then sent him a text. Chain, call me when you can. I tossed my cell in my purse as I stood, grabbing it and leaving my office.
I sat on the couch at my house, waiting for Chain. I called and texted him over and over without a response. I even called his office line and was met with his voicemail. This was strange, very strange. I decided to drive over to Callie’s, hoping I could talk to David.
I walked up to the door and rang the bell. Callie answered a few seconds later.
“Violet, what are you doing here?” she queried.
I sucked in a breath before saying, “Is David here?”
She shook her head. “No, he’s working late. Why, what’s going on?” she asked suspiciously.
I shrugged. “I haven’t heard from Chain all day and I was worried. I was hoping that maybe David knew what was going on.”
She chuckled. “Come in and we’ll talk.” I followed her into the kitchen and she grabbed a couple of sodas from the fridge, placing one on the counter in front of me, then her eyes bolted to the ring on my finger. Her mouth fell open as she lifted my hand.
She let out a squeal, before saying, “Oh my God, Violet, did you and Chain get engaged?”
I smiled as she released my hand, staring at the ring. “Yes, this morning.”
She scowled. “And you’re just now telling me?”
“Callie, I was going to tell you but I got sidetracked. Now can you please tell me what’s going on?”
She cracked her soda open and took a sip. “That architect from Minneapolis quit on them.”
I was shocked. “What?”
“Yeah. He said it was too much for him, that he couldn’t deal with the changes, so now they’re kind of screwed. David said he’s sick of using contractors and that he intends on hiring an architect on staff. He wants Christopher Blu, the guy that is always in the papers.”
I knew who Christopher Blu was. He was well known in Philly as one of the best architects. People paid top dollar for designs by Christopher Blu.
“God, he has to be expensive, how will they afford him?”
“David is pretty good at getting who or what he wants. I’m sure he will find a way.” I knew there was a logical reason why Chain hadn’t answered my calls or texts. I was glad I had driven over to Callie’s, it made me feel better. I finished up my soda and placed the empty can on the counter. “I’m going to get going,” I told her. She walked me to the door and gave me a hug. “I’ll talk to you soon.”
I waved and then left.
By nine o’clock, Chain was still not home, but I wasn’t worried. With what Callie said I figured he and David were held up in the office, still trying to hash out a plan to get the changes finished for the Minneapolis project. I was sure he would wake me, apologizing when he finally got home. I buried my head in my pillow and drifted off to sleep.
I woke in the morning to see his side of the bed not slept in. The comfort I had felt last night was completely gone. There was something wrong. I felt it deep in my gut. This was not like Chain. Maybe he was having second thoughts about marrying me? Whatever it was I needed to know. I hurried and got ready for work and made my way to his office.
I walked into the office building and was shocked to see a woman in her fifties sitting at the receptionist desk. I smiled as I approached her.
“I’m here to see Chain Alexander, I am Violet Townsend.”
She glanced down at a paper and then back up at me. “I’m sorry, Ms. Townsend, you are not allowed to be in the building.”
I opened my mouth in shock. “What do you mean? I’m Chain Alexander’s fiancée.”
“Ma’am, I have strict orders from Mr. Alexander that state if you show up we are to have you removed.” Removed? Why? She stood up and waved to the security guards near the front. They walked up and grabbed my arm. I yanked it away.
“I am perfectly capable of leaving on my own, thank you.”
Without another word, I rushed away. As I opened the front door, Dav
id walked in.
“Hey, Violet, where are you going?” Without a word, I ran out, hearing David scream my name from behind.
I was so humiliated, hurt by what Chain did. How could he do this to me, embarrass me like that, and why would he do it? What did I do? Was I cursed when it came to being engaged? Was I meant to spend my life alone?
Tears streamed down my face as I drove down the road. I wanted to get to my house, wither away into my sheets, hide away from the world, but at the last minute, I decided to make a detour to Callie’s.
I stood at the door ringing the bell and when Callie opened the door, I fell into her arms, sobbing.
“What’s wrong?” Callie asked.
“I went to Chain’s office and he had me banned.”
Callie’s eyes filled with rage. “What do you mean he had you banned?”
“I asked to see him and the receptionist told me that she had strict orders from him to have me removed from the premises,” I explained to her.
“Really.” Callie pulled me into the house and sat me down on the couch. “Sit here, I’m going to call David.”
“Okay.” She grabbed her cell and walked into the kitchen. She talked so low I couldn’t make out what she was saying. Five minutes later, she walked into the room and sat on the couch next to me.
“Violet, David talked to the security guards and it is true, Chain did have you banned from the office.”
“Why?”
She shook her head. “He doesn’t know, he went to talk to Chain and he was not in the office.”
“Because he was afraid to face David. Because he doesn’t want me anymore.”
She rubbed my arms. “You don’t know that.”
But I did. I felt it deep in my heart.
It was over.
It was really over.
And I had no clue why. For hours, I stayed locked up in Callie’s spare room as I descended into a deep depression. The pain was so unbearable; I closed my eyes, pleading with God to just take me. Death would be better than the torturous, agonizing pain of a broken heart.
Callie sat with me as I went through all the different emotions.
Rage—hurt—sadness.
My heart plummeted into a dark existence, torn to shreds, leaving behind an empty, aching shell. My body was defeated as my emotional weakness encompassed my whole self. The scorching heartache never wavered as my mind continued to think only of Chain. Why did he do this, why?
I heard the front door close. Callie kissed me on the forehead. “That must be Vince. I will be right back.” I didn’t even bother to ask her why Vince was there, I had no strength to utter a word, no strength to even think about it. I laid my head on the pillow and closed my eyes. But sleep was no longer an option, as my head still streamed with thoughts of Chain. If only I knew why he did this, why he let me go, maybe it would be easier to understand it. He gave me no warning, no clue that things weren’t working out. If anything he gave me the opposite impression. That he loved me, wanted to spend forever with me, that I was his one and only. What was it about me and being engaged that brought only bad luck?
“Not this shit again,” Vince bellowed as he flung the drapes open. I didn’t even bother to open my eyes, I didn’t bother to respond. What was the use? I was a fool, I had let myself again fall victim to a man that lied to me, crushed me, annihilated me, broke my heart, let me go without any explanation.
I felt lost.
Hurt.
Numb.
How could he? I knew I should have gone with my gut instinct, I should never have given him my heart, I knew he would hurt me. How many times did I have to do this before I realized that love was just not in the cards for me?
I felt a hand rub my shoulder and I turned to look into the concerned eyes of my brother Vince. “Hey,” he whispered.
I sniffed and gave him a light smile. “Hey.”
“Are you alright?” Very good question. Was I alright? No. I wasn’t. But I would be. I was becoming a pro at pain, with Harrison, Phillip and now Chain. I knew in time I would get over it. Vince lay on the bed next to me and draped his arm around my shoulder. “It will get better, Vi,” he murmured as he stared up at the ceiling. It was then that I noticed that he was hurting too. Vince adored Chain, they had become very close over the last few months and I could tell my brother was struggling with the situation as much as me. I scolded myself in my head for bringing Chain into his life, into my family. I had hurt them along with myself, trusting a man again.
I had to make sure my brother was alright and to do that, I had to reassure him that I was alright, even if I wasn’t. I turned towards him. “I know it will, Vince.”
He smiled as he patted my shoulder.
I had been through this before. Although this felt way worse than before, I knew it would get better, I just needed time. I had to give it time. But even after a week of being apart from Chain, I still couldn’t get him off of my mind. Maybe it was the lack of closure. He said he loved me, that he wanted to spend forever with me, but it was all just a lie, it had to be. I wanted to believe that an alien had scooped him up and reprogrammed his brain, but the bitter truth was that he left me and he just didn’t want me anymore.
My brothers invited me out with them tonight. So after work, I drove over to their house. We all piled into Victor’s car and made our way to the club.
I hated the club. The essence of it, the people, everything about it sickened me. But sitting at my house alone was not something I needed to do if I was going to get over Chain. I had to get out, live my life. Who knew, maybe I would find another man who could wash the pain away, who could make me feel better. I shook my head. The last thing I needed was another man in my life!
Millen was standing next to a few of my brothers’ friends when we walked in. He smiled as he took my hand and raised it to his lips. “Hello, beautiful,” he mumbled as he kissed each one of my knuckles softly.
“Hi.” He raised his hand to the waitress and she walked over.
“What can I get you to drink, Violet?”
“I’ll take a rum and coke.” He repeated my order to the waitress and she walked away.
“Come on, Violet, let’s get a table,” Millen stated. I followed him to the back and we sat down.
Millen politely slid out a chair for me and I sat down, then he sat next to me.
“So I heard you and that mall boyfriend of yours broke up,” Millen blurted out as he took my drink from the waitress and placed it in front of me. Chain, his name was Chain, I wanted to shout out. I despised when people characterized someone by what they did and not by their proper name.
“Yeah,” I answered as I sipped on my drink.
He frowned. “You’re upset about it.” Of course I was. Didn’t he understand? Chain wasn’t any ordinary man, he was the man I loved, the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, the one I saw forever with.
“It’s just new, that’s all,” I responded as I continued sipping on my drink.
He slid his hand across the table and placed it on mine. “If you ever need someone to talk to, Violet, I’m here for you.”
I smiled. “Thank you.” He leaned back on his chair. “So, are you dating yet?”
“No, it’s too soon.”
“Why? What are you waiting for? You should get right back out there.” It wasn’t that easy. The few months I had been with Chain had changed me forever and I knew it had changed him. No matter how much he was denying it to himself, we were soul mates, we belonged together. Why did he do this? Why?
Millen played with his straw in his drink before saying, “You know, I have always had a crush on you. Ever since the first time I saw you, but you were with that accountant guy at the time.” His words shocked me. I should be running away from this man after how he treated me at my parents’ house, but I was confused and messed up in the head from what Chain had done. And I needed comfort, I needed the empty loneliness that I felt to go away.
Millen’s green ey
es gleamed as he smiled brightly. I had never really noticed his eyes before; they reminded me of emeralds, big and bold and beautiful. I took a moment to study him. He was taller than any other man I knew, even Chain, and muscular—his arms were so big they were stretching every fiber of the dark cotton tee he was wearing. I liked my men fit, but not like Millen.
“I didn’t know that.”
“Well you know now and I guess I’m hoping that maybe when you are ready, you will let me take you out.”
I had no words, no answers. I was numb inside, my mind was trapped with thoughts of Chain.
He stood up and held his hand out to me.
“Dance with me.” A slow song was streaming through the speakers. My head was saying no, but my hand reached out and took his. It was as if I had no control over my actions, like I was a robot just going through the motions, without any real feeling inside.
Gently he placed his hand on my waist. As we swayed to the music his smell lingered in my nose. His hand slid up to the small of my back and his touch sent a tingling sensation through my body and I closed my eyes, embracing it. Thoughts of Chain flooded my mind and I could feel tears pooling beneath my lids as the loneliness engulfed me completely.
My mind began to spin as all I could think about was Chain.
His lips.
His touch.
His love.
My body shook as my emotions began to overwhelm me. I pulled away.
“Violet?” Millen murmured. Why did he leave me? Why did he lie? Why…why?
Chapter 6.0 – Chain
Of all the nights I had to choose to go to Curtsey’s, it had to be this night, the night Violet was there. I hid in the shadows in the corner, watching her all night. I should have left, but I couldn’t. I missed her with every dreaded breath I took, the touch of her, the smell of her, the desire for her. I needed to feel her, even if it was at a distance.
Watching her dance intimately with Millen killed me, tore my heart to shreds. It hurt to know that she had moved on so quickly, especially with him. It questioned if she had ever really loved me in the first place. I couldn’t even think about going near a woman, much less dancing the way she was on the dance floor with him right now.
