by Roslyn Woods
“Where will you be staying?” he asked as he refilled Shell’s coffee mug.
“The Hilton Anatole. It’s downtown on the Stemmons Freeway near I-thirty-five.”
“I’ve been there.”
“What for?”
“Software design conference.”
“I’d be lost at one of those,” said Shell, shaking her head. “Did you learn anything?”
“No.”
“Really? Nothing?”
“I gave the keynote and left.”
“Oh,” Shell said and paused. “You always surprise me.” It seemed like quite a feat to be asked to deliver the keynote at a software design conference, and she had a moment of wondering if she knew anything about the man she was looking at.
“It was no big deal. I gave a talk to a bunch of geeks.”
“I admire geeks. You know those guys who drive the Geek Squad vans?”
“Yeah.”
“I admire those guys.”
“Please tell me you don’t.”
“I’d be lying.”
“I guess I should be glad. Those guys are my people,” he said with a smile and put her coffee on the table.
“Why did they pick you for the keynote?” she asked as he sat down.
“A little piece of software I designed did well. Apparently, that’s what it takes to be asked to speak to the Geek Squad.”
“Apparently, I don’t know very much about you.”
“You know everything that matters,” he said, looking serious.
“Will I have a hard time finding my way around at the Hilton Anatole?”
“There will be people to help you at every turn.”
“Anything I should know?”
“It’s big,” he said.
“So I hear.”
“I really wish I could go with you,” Dean added, looking into his cup as if there were some answer there.
“Me, too.”
“You won’t be going anywhere else?”
“Oh, I don’t know. We’ll go out to dinner tonight after Jan’s part at the conference. She’s doing a talk right now and again this afternoon. We’ll just have a sort of brunch together tomorrow, and then I’ll probably come home. She’ll be doing another talk in the afternoon.”
“Will you get to hear her speak?”
“I might catch a little bit of it, but I don’t want to make her nervous. It might feel sort of…out-of-context…to have her cousin listen to her talk to a bunch of educators about student success and teaching science to college prep students.”
“But it would let you see a side of her you don’t know.”
“Yes, I’ll admit I’m curious about what she’s like in her world.”
“Well, either way, it’ll be good for you to catch up.”
“It will.”
He was looking out the window again, and Shell could feel his unhappiness about her leaving without him. Maybe he was feeling bad because she didn’t understand his reasons very well. She was still feeling her own disappointment, not just about the fact that he wasn’t going with her, but about her place in his priorities. It wasn’t the time to talk about it.
“You won’t be visiting your old haunts?” he asked.
“What do you mean?”
“Seeing any old friends?”
“If you’re asking if I’m planning to go by the Bauer Gallery, no, I’m not. It’s quite a bit north of where I’ll be, and I don’t want to see those people anyway.”
He nodded and looked out the window.
“When do you see Melinda?” Shell asked.
“Five this afternoon was the only time she could make it work.”
Shell nodded, not particularly happy that his meeting with Melinda was likely to end at just the dinner hour. She had seen the young woman’s picture on her old website, and she was quite attractive. “When do you have to be at your first appointment today?”
“About a half-hour.”
“You’re going to be late.”
“I know.”
“You should go. I’ll message you. We can talk later,” she added.
“You might be out late with Jan,” Dean said, frowning.
“Yes, if I don’t call, that’s why.”
“Message me before you go to sleep. I’ll be awake.”
“It might be late.”
“I don’t care.”
Traveling north on I-35 brought memories of the previous year to the surface. Shell hadn’t been to Dallas since last October when she had moved back to Austin. She had been living there with her then-boyfriend, Brad Bauer, and she had decided the two of them were completely wrong for each other. Actually, that decision had been made long before the day she actually left Dallas, but she had submitted to Brad’s persuasion that even though she didn’t think they should be in a romantic relationship she should give it time.
Brad had pleaded with her to stay months before she finally worked up the courage to leave. He had said she could have her own bedroom and he would respect her desire to sleep alone. He had. And the loft had been enormous. He had said she should also use one of the extra rooms as a painting studio, and she should let him show her what a great life they could eventually build together.
At the time, she felt she had nowhere else to go, and worse, she could hardly bear to spend time alone. It was one of the effects of her mother’s death. Initially, Brad had won her attention by being light and charming. As time wore on, she had realized there was little else going on with him. He was wealthy, to be sure, but he was definitely not her type. She felt like he was a kid brother, a child. She liked him, but she was never going to love him.
When she had finally decided she could live in Brad’s apartment no more, Shell had gone to tell him at his gallery and found him kissing her friend Lisa Falco, the person who had introduced them. Even though Shell didn’t love Brad, she felt betrayed by both of them. While Brad had been insisting that Shell stay with him, he had been having an affair with Lisa. It was so weird.
Weirder yet was what happened after Shell left Dallas and returned to Austin. Brad had come to Austin, found the place she had rented from Dean, performed a jealous rant, and proposed to her right in front of Dean. Of course, she had sent him home with a definite no, and she had heard nothing from him since, but Dean hadn’t liked him at all, and even though she and Dean weren’t together at the time he witnessed Brad’s proposal, he had admitted to having a hard time with it.
Shell was glad this trip was not going to involve the Bauer gallery or anyone in it. She was going to focus on having a good visit with Jan, and she was going to think through her feelings about her relationship with Dean and his choice to stay in Austin.
She was already beginning to get it sorted. Remembering the life she’d had before she and Dean became a couple made her appreciate him more. It had all happened so quickly, she had never really had a chance to understand it.
There she had been, trying to establish a place to be, focus on her art, and enjoy being near her friend Margie again. Maybe get a little dog for a companion. That had been her plan. But the intrigue surrounding Dean’s impending murder charge had captured her imagination, and her curious nature had gotten the better of her. And it was more than that. She was attracted to him from the moment she laid eyes on him. He was a magnet to her. His ideas, his books, his garden, even his beautiful dog drew her to him. She had fallen hopelessly in love with him, and she thanked her lucky stars every day that he seemed to want her with him.
In a moment of pure realization, Shell suddenly discerned the only way to view her situation with Dean. All it had taken was a little time alone to think. She realized that she had found a man to be with who had values, real principles to live by. He was worried about fairness and was willing to sacrifice what he wanted for that.
The dawning awareness that she had made him feel bad about not coming on this trip was making her feel awful. She wanted to pull the car over and call him right then. But no, that woul
dn’t do. He was in the middle of meetings with clients. Later. Later she would send him a message and apologize.
It was about this moment when her cell made its dinging sound to tell her she had a text. Maybe it was Dean. She pressed the button and said, “Read message.”
In a moment, Siri’s electronic voice answered, “You have a message from Lisa Falco…Sold three of your paintings. Don’t know where to send the check. Call me?”
Shell was stunned. She hadn’t heard a word from Brad or Lisa in nearly seven months. Now, on the very day she was headed toward Dallas, she hears from Lisa, her former friend. It was an odd coincidence, and even though she didn’t much want to talk to Lisa, she had to admit that selling three of her paintings would mean a nice little sum of money, and she was running low. The Westside Gallery had drained her account, and who knew what was going to happen now that they had lost Garrett?
“Call Lisa Falco,” Shell said into the cell without taking her eyes off the road.
She listened while the phone rang, and she waited, wondering how to behave. It didn’t matter really. She didn’t care that Brad and Lisa were together. It was just their way of going about it that had been so insulting. She just hoped Lisa wouldn’t start in talking and be unable to stop. She had always been quite a chatterbox.
“Hello? Shell?”
“Yes.”
“I’m so glad you called! I was afraid you wouldn’t after…after everything. I feel so bad! Well this is just wonderful, hearing back from you! I feel like I have so much to tell you—”
“You say you’ve sold some of my paintings?” Shell asked, cutting her off, but Lisa remained unperturbed.
“Yes! I’m the manager at the gallery now, and well, anyway, three of your paintings sold this week to one buyer. He just fell in love with them! Honestly, I think he’s considering coming back for the other two, and wouldn’t that just be great, I mean, to sell all of your paintings to one buyer in a matter of two weeks—”
“Well, that would be great,” said Shell, cutting Lisa off again, “but I think I’d like to put them in my new gallery.”
“Yes, I’ve heard all about your new gallery! I sounds so wonderful, but oh my God I’m just so very, very sorry about Garrett!”
“How did you hear?”
“It’s been on the news, but everyone in Dallas has been talking about it. I mean…everyone in all the galleries. He was so…so…loved. It’s a tragedy of massive proportions! The whole art world is mourning his loss! He was just an icon of what everyone wants to know and be…just so, so loved and admired!”
“Yes, I imagine he was. I had grown fond of him myself.”
“You know, he and Leonardo Parisi came up only a week ago and looked around the gallery. We had such a nice visit. It was just shocking to hear Garrett had been—”
“Yes. It was shocking. I didn’t know they’d come up to Dallas.”
“Yes, last week. It must have been…Tuesday, I think.”
Shell thought about it. That was a day she and Margie had been at the gallery with Billie. “They didn’t mention it to me.”
“I think they were just checking out our new show. Anyway they told us all about The Westside Gallery. Garrett had a lot of praise for you!”
“Hmm,” was all Shell could say, not knowing what to think about the visit from Garrett and Leo. Maybe they hadn’t said anything because Leo knew about her history with Brad and thought it would be awkward to say they had been to his gallery.
“Well, anyway, I’d like to send your check to you. It seems so weird, not having an address for one of my best—”
“Well, actually,” Shell interrupted, “I happen to be on my way to Dallas right now. I wasn’t planning to come all the way up to the gallery, but I could come pick up the check and my paintings. It would be a good time to do that, I guess.”
“Where are you staying?”
“The Hilton Anatole.”
“Well, listen, this might work. I’m going down to Waco to see my mom tomorrow. How about I bring your check and your paintings by on my way? It’s an easy turn off I-thirty-five. It would save you coming all the way up here, and there’s been a lot of construction near the gallery, so it’s hard to park anyway.”
“That would be good. Are you sure you don’t mind?”
“No. It’s no problem at all. Can I come by at around nine?”
“That would actually be just right. I’m having brunch with someone at ten.”
“Okay, then! I’ll see you tomorrow at nine! I’m really happy to get to see you again, Shell! It’s going to be so wonderful to—”
“Okay, thanks.”
“Bye, Shell.”
As she ended the call, Shell shook her head. Lisa had acted as if they were still friends. Her only reference to the way she had treated Shell the previous year was saying she wasn’t sure Shell would call back because of “everything.” Oh well! It would be great to get some money from the sale of three paintings, and it would be nice to have two more paintings to put in the gallery in Austin.
The Hilton Anatole was huge, and Shell could see why it was used for conferences. The place had seventy-six meeting rooms and a seven-acre sculpture garden. There were twelve restaurants in the building. There would be no need to go out tonight.
She checked in at the desk and found her room was on the tenth floor across from one of the elevators. Jan had left a message that she would come by at four. That would give Shell time to write a text to Dean before changing for dinner. She dropped her bag and took in the size of the room. There was a king-sized bed directly across from the entrance, and an ample sitting area with a sofa and club chairs off to the side. There was even a little dining table by the window with a stunning view of Dallas. She tossed her keys onto the desk beside a tall, yellow orchid and took her phone from its pocket in her purse. In a moment she was sinking into one of the club chairs and starting her text.
I’m on the tenth floor of the Hilton Anatole in room 1017. You were right about this place being big! I’m sorry I made you feel bad about not coming on this trip to Dallas with me. I don’t know why I couldn’t see that you were doing the right thing. Of course we can go see Jan sometime, but it’s not really important. I’m looking forward to our trip to California, and I’m determined to find a way to make that happen even though we have so much going on at the gallery. I hope you’re having a good day. I’m glad you’re the way you are.
She wanted to add that she missed him, but she was afraid it would sound like she was still trying to make him feel guilty for not coming with her, so she left that part off and hit send.
The visit was wonderful. Jan looked a lot like she had as a kid, slightly tomboyish, and at the same time completely put together. She was Shell’s age and about the same height. But in other ways, the two young women couldn’t have been more different. Shell was blond with blue-green eyes while Jan’s hair was a deep espresso brown, and her eyes were brown, too. They went for a walk on the lovely grounds of the Anatole before going to dinner at Ser Steak and Spirits, one of the hotel’s restaurants. For Shell, this visit meant a new connection to her family. She and Jan really hadn’t known each other as adults. They sat at a quiet table remembering playing together as children, remembering their parents, and trying to remember when the closeness between their two families had drifted away.
“The thing is,” said Jan pushing a short lock of dark hair behind her ear, “I’ve been missing having a family. I often wish I lived closer to you.”
“I wish that too, Jan,” said Shell. “I often wish it. Somehow we’ve ended up so isolated. I felt like I didn’t really know you anymore.”
“I felt that way, too, but now that we’ve seen each other I feel like we’ve always been close. There is a family feeling.”
“I feel it, too. You look so much like Uncle Rick and my dad!”
“You look so much like your mom, but I see your dad, too.”
“How did it happen, all this distance?”
Shell asked.
“Space and time, I guess. I mean, our dads worked in different parts of the country. We grew up seeing each other once in a blue moon, and when your dad died, well, my dad quit visiting you and your mom. He talked about wanting to go back to California to see you, but then he got lung cancer, and it was all over so fast.”
“I know. None of us knows how much time there is, and we all think we’ll do this or that, but we should do the important things now. I’m so glad you called me and asked me to come up here.”
“I’m so glad you came.”
They talked until very late before heading up to their rooms. Jan’s room was on the second floor, so they said good night in the elevator and planned to see each other at brunch the following morning.
As the elevator slid upwards toward her room, Shell checked her phone for a message from Dean. He had buzzed her at 11:30 but somehow she had missed it.
Thanks for the message. It made me feel better than I can tell you here. I’ve had a long day and am turning in now. Can’t wait till you get home tomorrow. I miss you.
She didn’t want to wake him, but he had asked her to text before she went to sleep. Even though it was past midnight now, she texted.
Had a great visit with Jan. Not sure I can sleep without you. I miss you, too.
Chapter 16
After taking photos and discussing the website for the last meeting of his day, Melinda Gardner’s, Dean headed for P. Terry’s for a hamburger and fries. He figured he would eat in the car, not wanting to go home to the house to eat alone. But just as he was about to turn into the fast food place on the corner of Lamar and Riverside, his phone rang. He went ahead and pulled into the parking lot before answering. It was Margie.
“Hey, bro. You wanna come over and eat dinner with me? Donald’s working late, and I’ve made a lovely chicken pot pie. The pastry is flaky, and the filling is scrumptious.”
