by Alexx Andria
But then he said, "Yeah well, don't get too cozy. The medication that I take renders my Fated Mate coding inactive. I’m supposed to take one pill per day at the same time each day without missing a single dose or else it’s ineffective. Apparently, whatever it is about this place that makes it vibrate with energy, was strong enough to mess with the medication within hours of missing my scheduled dose.”
“I don’t understand?”
“Do you really want to know?” He almost looked desperate as if he wanted me to back down. Almost as if he were begging me with his gaze to stop asking questions. Of course that just made me want to know more.
My mouth firmed. “Spill it. What could be so bad that you're freaking out like this?"
He lowered to say in a low, urgent tone, “Because if all signs are to be believed, you tripped my Fated Mate coding!”
I stared. "Are you saying what I think you're saying?"
"Yeah, that's what I'm saying."
I balked. "You think I'm your mate? You're a fossil. There is no way in hell that I would be mated to someone as old as you are."
“Will you stop saying that? I’m not old," he growled. “And sorry to burst your bubble but age has nothing to do with it. It has to do with our genetic coding, I already told you that."
"Well fuck that. I am not going to hitch my wagon to someone as old as you. This isn’t fucking Arkansas.”
"You think I want to be attached to someone as immature and irritating as you? Trust me, you are not my first choice.”
“You’d be lucky to have me as your Fated Mate,” I retorted, stung by his rejection.
“Even if by some cruel twist of fate you and I are Fated Mates, I'm back on my meds and I don't feel shit toward you right now so we're good.”
I stared. How had my life been so totally and completely ripped apart? In the last two weeks I'd lost my best friend, been fondled by some weird spiritual guru and now discovered that monsters are real (and I am one of them) and my DNA thinks that the angry stranger with the chip on his shoulder would be a good match?
Someone was having a good laugh at my expense.
"I have no interest in having a mate. It's not personal. I love my job and I have zero interest in settling down and raising a few pups."
I made a face. "Oh my God, did you just say pups? Do people give birth to puppies? I don't want to do that. Ever. I'm about to have a panic attack." I waved my hand in front of my face, needing air. "I am not ready for this level of disclosure. Can I opt out of this whole shifter experience? I'd rather just go back to being a normal, boring human being with a general disdain for everything and numb out on pop culture.“
"No, you don't get to opt out. There is no opting out for any of us but I found a witch who was able to make my medication so that I don't have to deal with an unfortunate pairing. I don't know why you never transitioned in puberty and I don't know why you're tripping my switch. It doesn't make any sense. So we're just gonna chill out, not do anything rash, and I’ll see what I can find out from my superiors.
He looked so irritated as if it was somehow my fault that our DNA liked each other. "Just so you know I make a terrible girlfriend," I said. "I don't like to be tied down either."
"Excellent. Works for me because I'm not looking to be your boyfriend."
I made a face. “Being my boyfriend would really up your social game.“ I said with a sniff. I'm not sure why I was feeling defensive but he should be flattered to have someone like me on his arm. He'd get a lot of pats on the back for his prowess for landing a hot chick like me. However conversely, people would look at me as a gold digger or something. Because he's clearly so much older than me. I shuddered. "Are there any other gross things I need to know about this new reality I'm in?"
He cast me a dark look. "Nothing I want to talk to you about. Let's just stick to the case."
I agreed, feeling snippy and snappy. I was a damn good catch. "I'll just have you know that I was actually very popular in high school,” I said.
Even as I said it, I sounded stupid. Why did that matter? It didn't. I was grasping at straws because I was miffed that he didn't consider it a great honor to be paired with me.
I sighed. "Fine, let's stop picking at each other like an old married couple — bad choice of words — and get back to solving this case. I'll go and talk to the McCormicks and see if I can get more information on their guru and you go talk to your superior about my condition. Maybe the answer lies in the mystery of why I didn't transition at puberty. Who knows, maybe there's a medical explanation for all of this. Maybe it wasn't an actual true pairing — because how crazy would that be — and there's a glitch that's causing us to react in weird ways."
That actually seemed to work for him. "You might be onto something. Your biology is off. It could be this place. Since stepping foot into the Diablo Falls my senses have been on overdrive. I honestly don't know how you can live here. It's just too much for my tastes.”
"I think it's one of those things that you just adapt to. I've never noticed anything until you came along."
"Well, for both our sakes let's just hope that it's a glitch and not a true pairing."
"Just for the sake of argument, what if it was a true pairing? What happens then?"
"Nothing. Because it's not." But when I didn't budge and he realized that I would keep asking, he sighed with annoyance and added, "if it were a true pairing we would eventually become unable to fight our impulses. My impulse as the male would be to claim my female. I would want to destroy anyone who came near my territory. I would become very protective and very obsessed with your safety and well-being."
"Well aside from the obvious stalker red flags, it's a little romantic."
"It absolutely is not, it's horrific and it's never going to happen because at the end of the day we have nothing in common and even if the sex was bone-meltingly amazing, you can't fuck all day. At some point we’d have to have an actual conversation. And I just don't see you and I having great conversations."
"Yeah? That's something we can agree upon." I glared. "You are the most pessimistic person I've ever met. You know I'm not saying I want to be hitched to you or attached to you in any way but surely there are pairings that aren't as bleak and awful as you paint them out to be? There has to be success stories even romantic ones out there in our universe right?"
It's not that I wanted him to feel a certain way about me but I actually didn't want him to hate me either. Hate sex had its place but I didn't want a steady diet of it.
"You're talking to the wrong person. Like I said, I'm not the right fit for someone to mentor a newborn shifter. And definitely not the right person to wax poetically about shifter pairings. If it were up to me I would rout it out of our DNA forever."
He rose abruptly, the chair skidding and making an awful racket. "Keep your cell handy, I'll be in touch."
And then he walked away. Leaving me behind.
Even though I didn't like the idea of pairing with him, I did feel a connection building and growing. I sensed when he was angry, I could feel his energy when he entered a room.
And back in the forest… A different energy, more primal more intense than anything I'd ever experienced took over my mind and body. The feeling was both intoxicating and terrifying. I shook with the realization that if he hadn't taken control and pushed me away, I would have let him fuck me right there on the forest floor.
Inches away from where my best friend had gasped her last breath.
What a nightmare. This pairing shit was medieval. Hopefully, it wasn't a true pairing and it indeed was just a glitch. As soon as he left, whatever I was going through would stop. I was looking forward to that moment.
In the meantime, I had to talk to the McCormicks to see if I could find out anything else about Belinda.
At least it was a distraction.
A sorely needed one at that.
Lyric
I was half surprised that the McCormicks were willing to see me, especial
ly after my reception at the funeral. Maryann looked tired but remained the solicitous hostess. George was away on business. The death of a daughter didn't warrant more than a few days of downtime, it would seem.
"Thank you for agreeing to see me. How are you doing?" I asked, but it was a stupid question and I don't know why it came out of my mouth. Social niceties sometimes were lame and useless.
However Marianne seemed to understand that some responses were appropriate and just part of the social etiquette that we all adhered to.
"That's very kind of you to ask, Lyric. I am managing. Each day is a little bit easier but I don't think I'll ever get over losing my only child."
"Be gentle with yourself. Give yourself time to grieve."
She nodded, accepting my advice. Like I was in any position to give advice to be honest. My grief popped up in unexpected places and sidelined me when I least expected it. I could only imagine what it must feel like for Maryann.
"I want to apologize for my behavior at the funeral," Maryann said, her voice catching. "I was insensitive to your grief. I know you were very close and you must be missing her very much."
My eyes welled with tears as I nodded. "I still can't believe she's gone."
"I still feel as if she's going to walk into the room and start sassing me over something silly." Maryann’s eyes filled. "Isn't it crazy that I miss that? The thing that I couldn't stand the most is the thing I would do anything to have back."
I saw Maryann in a new light. I’d always been on Rachel’s side of any argument with her mother because that was my job as her bestie but right now I just saw Maryann as a grieving mom who would do anything to have her daughter back.
“Maryann, may I ask you something?"
"Of course, what is it?"
"How well do you know Belinda?" I asked, holding my breath. I was treading on dangerous ground. I needed to be mindful of how and what I asked. “I was just wondering because Rachel didn't seem to know much about her and she's a very interesting individual." That's putting it lightly.
Maryann relaxed as if she'd been tensed and ready to go on the defensive. "Well I know that Rachel wasn't a fan of Belinda but it's only because she didn't get a chance to know her the way we do. Belinda is soul of light and just being around her has been such a kindness to our hearts.”
“I can imagine,” I murmured the lie. “I’m glad you have someone to help you through the hard times.”
“She’s really a wonder. We are so blessed to have her hear with us. You know, it might do you some good to have a session with Belinda. You’ll feel much better, I promise.”
Not gonna happen. The woman made the hair on my neck stand up straight. “Maybe I will,” I said. “How did you meet Belinda?”
“It was fate,” Maryann answered with a warm smile. “George and I were searching for something and then Belinda appeared in our life. Of course, we didn’t realize what we were looking for until she filled that void and now I can’t imagine life without her.”
“So she just popped up and started being your spiritual guide?”
“Well, not exactly. George and I were invited to a spiritual retreat and we met her there. Of course, we didn’t want to be selfish but we knew the minute we met that she was meant to be here with us. It’s very cosmic, dear.”
It sounds like bullshit to me. “How wonderful,” I said with a fake smile. “And Rachel said you built her a place on your property…?”
“Yes, it’s called a yurt. Very spiritual. You can feel the energy pulsing and surrounding you the minute you step inside. Very healing.”
“I’ll bet.”
“Darling, you really should have a cleansing session with Belinda. She can clear your aura of all the gunk blocking your chakras.”
“I’ll have to check my schedule but I’ll get back to you. I’m still on the hunt for a summer job. Rachel and I were trying to find a job together.”
“Ahh yes, Belinda suggested a summer job would help clear Rachel’s throat chakra as it was blocked. She thought we were trying to punish her but actually quite the opposite. We only wanted to help her blossom to her full potential. Belinda is so wise. I wish Rachel had been able to see that we were all on her side.”
I reached for Maryann’s hand and squeezed it gently. “She knows that now,” I promised, hoping to ease her pain. I might not be a spiritual guru but I recognized raw grief. Maryann smiled through her tears and patted my hand. “Rachel knew how much you loved her.”
“Do you think so?” Maryann asked. “I don’t know anymore.”
A caught movement from the corner of my eye. For a brief second, I saw Rachel standing in the foyer, staring at us. The vision took my breath away and I actually jumped, startling Maryann as well.
“Are you all right, dear?” Maryann asked, concerned. “Do you need some water? You look pale as a ghost.”
Appropriate seeing as I think I just saw Rachel’s ghost.
And she did not look happy.
This was the second time I’d seen Rachel and it was starting to freak me out. Was my best friend haunting me?
Before Beckham’s revelation that monsters were real, I would’ve scoffed at the idea of my bestie doing the haunt routine but I couldn’t afford to disregard anything at this point.
Hell, what did I know? Ghosts were probably as real as aliens and Big Foot at this point.
“Actually, some water would be great,” I said with a grateful smile. Maryann nodded and rushed to get me something to drink. Once Maryann was out of earshot, I whispered to the empty room, “Rachel, if you’re trying to tell me something you have to do better than just popping in for a few seconds with a sour look on your face. Stop being a diva and just tell me the point you’re trying to make.” I waited a few seconds, listening in earnest. When nothing but the soft tick of the mantel clock answered me, I sighed and shook my head, muttering, “Not helpful.”
Maryann returned with a glass of water. “Did you say something, dear?”
“No, just clearing my throat,” I said, accepting the glass and taking a small sip. “Thank you.” I took a wild stab in the dark. “Would you mind if I spent a little time in Rachel’s room? I’m just missing her so much right now.”
Maryann’s gaze warmed with understanding. “Sometimes I just sit on her bed and pretend that she’s out and about and will be home any minute. Helps to soothe the pain, at least temporarily if Belinda isn’t available for a session.”
I nodded. “I just miss her so much.” That part was true but I’d bet dollars to donuts that if Rachel was watching me right now she was rolling her eyes at my pathetic display. Even Rachel would’ve called bullshit but Maryann was none the wiser and gave me permission.
I bounded up the stairs and entered Rachel’s room. Thankfully, Maryann opted to remain downstairs. I’d spent many a night here in this palatial house but it’d never felt like a second home to me. If anything Rachel had always preferred to stay at my place. She’d always said it felt cozier and more welcoming than her own house.
Maryann’s house was like a show piece, a house always ready for a camera crew to show up and start filming, as Rachel used to say.
Even in death Rachel’s room was picture perfect, which had been something Maryann had been militant about when Rachel was alive.
Glad to see some things never changed.
“Okay, show yourself. I know you’re lurking, which is weird by the way. Just give me a sign. Point me in the right direction so I can help bring your killer to justice.” I waited, my ears straining for the slightest sound. I frowned at the silence. “Really? Nothing? This is so like you, Rachel McCormick. I’m out here busting my ass to find your killer with almost no help and you can’t even lift a ghost finger to—”
Something clattered to the floor from the bureau. I followed the sound. I picked up a charm bracelet with tiny crystals that I’d never seen before. I was willing to bet my eye-teeth that Rachel had never worn it. For one, Rachel didn’t care for crystals �
�� she said wearable rocks weren’t her style — so I knew this wasn’t something she’d pick out for herself.
I pocketed it. To the room, I said, “I guess I’ll take what I can get. Although I have no idea what I’m supposed to do with this bracelet.”
With one final look around the room, I added softly, “I miss you girl. I really miss you” and closed the door behind me.
Lyric
I’m not sure when I fell asleep — I certainly hadn’t planned to — but my eyes drifted shut beneath the balmy heat and I was out. The park was quiet and secluded, which made it a favorite of mine when I needed some alone time.
The large tree provided a shaded canopy and I was emotionally exhausted by everything I’d been through in the last few days.
This time my dreams were different — I wasn’t chasing a deer, I was being chased.
But it wasn’t fear that raced through my veins but excited adrenaline.
Even arousal.
Something tackled me from behind and I went crashing to the ground. We tucked and rolled. My elbows scraped across the dirt but I felt no pain, only pleasure.
I was on my back, staring into those dark eyes, quivering with anticipation. It was Beckham, larger than normal, human but not human. His eyes were pitch black, his teeth were large. He vibrated with sensual heat that I wanted to bathe and roll around in.
His hard cock ground against my pelvis, insistent, hot and brutal. I writhed, pressing my wet heat against him, desperate to feel him inside me.
My nipples ached, hardened like peach pits. My clothing scratched and irritated my sensitive skin.
Nothing mattered but this moment between us. I wanted to meld into one. Be one with him. Never in my life had I felt such an overwhelming urge to connect with another person.
He wasn’t pushing me away. I sensed his hunger like my own. We mirrored each other in sense and thought.
Mine, his soul whispered and my soul answered back.
I was losing my mind, right? I didn’t care. His lips crashed against mine and I hungrily devoured his. A liquid fire spread through my veins and ignited something wild inside me. What was this insanity and why did I crave it like cells craved oxygen?
