She stares down at our joined fingers and then through long eyelashes up at my face. “Mace,” she begins, then stops, licks her lips and tries again. “Mace, do you think we could try first base before we go in and eat?”
Well I’ll be fucked. The muscles in my cheeks begin to tighten as my mouth forms a crescent. Seems either the vibration of the bike or being so close to me has had an effect. One that I very much like.
“I think,” I bend my head so we’re less than a few inches apart, “that’s a fuckin’ excellent idea.” Slowly, so fucking slowly, I close the distance.
One of my hands still holds hers. Using only that to anchor her to me, I gently brush my lips over her soft ones, a sweet innocent kiss I haven’t deployed since I was younger than Cas.
It’s her who wants more. She curls her free hand around my neck, trying to prevent my escape and increasing the pressure where our lips meet. I let her lead as her tongue demands entry into my mouth, then imitate her actions.
Even though it’s become more sensual, it’s still an innocent kiss. Perfectly acceptable in a place where there are families and children close by. Nevertheless, it’s sexually charged and full of promise. I can’t get enough of her taste, my appetite for food has fled, it’s her I want instead. I get a waft of the shampoo she uses, and my free hand brushes against the soft smooth skin of her face, brushing aside the silky strands of her hair. While from the restaurant behind us there’s a clattering of plates, the sound is drowned out by the little moan that escapes from her.
My cock thickens and I know it’s time to pull back, before my wrong head takes over and demands I take her to a more discreet place, and fuck this second and third base lark, take her straight to fourth.
“Mace…?” Her eyes are wide, and her fingers touch her lips.
“Perfect, babe.” And it was. I can’t find other words to describe it. Simply kissing a girl is not who I am. Club whores don’t need such foreplay, and would far rather have my mouth somewhere else. If a citizen girl demands it, I’ll oblige, but only to get her into the mood. With Shayla? The kiss was an end in itself. Of course it left me wanting more, but also with a feeling of satisfaction. I know I’ll want to do that again. Heck, I can barely stop myself reaching for her now.
I jerk my chin toward the restaurant, and no words need to be said. Still holding her hand tightly, I lead her inside.
As we eat, I listen to her glowing recount of how much she enjoyed riding my bike as if I needed words to prove it. Her enthusiasm makes me hope it will be sooner, rather than later, we’ll be making that trip to Flagstaff.
If one short journey makes her want to kiss me like she’s just done, I have to wonder what effect a longer one will have.
Chapter Thirty-Six
Lizard
While there’s still an underlying current of unease deep inside me, I have to admit the biker compound is completely different to anything I expected. I may not recognise the people that live here, but they all treat me like a friend, without any uneasiness or distrust that they’d show toward a stranger.
My stomach replete with an excellent breakfast that was particularly tasty after hospital food, I take another coffee out into the surprisingly clean and comfortable clubroom, seating myself on a couch which I’d expected to find old and worn, but still looks relatively new. I ease myself back and rest my head. It wouldn’t take much for me to doze off, but I try and fight the wave of tiredness that floods over me.
I consider the people I’ve met. Demon and his wife Vi, the president and first lady. Thunder who’s the sergeant-at-arms, and Mace the enforcer, whatever that means. Beef who’s the VP and Steph, his old lady who’s blind. Then Buzzard and Sindy, Bomber and Jeannie who I haven’t quite got the measure of yet. One minute she’s all smiles and laughter, and the next, well, let’s just say she runs a tight ship. Sparky who introduced himself as the road captain, and Cad who apparently spends most of his life with his computers—a man so pale I half expect him to admit he sleeps in a coffin.
Then there’s Ink, who seems to believe himself a close friend as well as a fellow Marine. I’ve also met Rusty, an older man, who’s particularly interested in my health. Pyro seems solid, and Mel, his wife, is expecting their first kid. Paladin had appeared right at the end of breakfast with Jayden who barely looks legal, but I’m assured she definitely is. Wills and Judge, two younger men who haven’t long been members.
Nails and Dirt are two of the prospects. Bagel’s their dog, and Max is Beef’s wife’s guide dog. The other prospects, what are their names? Oh yeah, Karl and Beaver, I’ve not yet met.
I give a small smile, my brain having successfully passed my simple test of remembering everyone I’ve come across. Wait, wasn’t there also a man called Hellfire? Demon’s dad I was told?
When I’d first suffered my brain injury, my short-term memory had been fucked, or so Vanna had told me. That I can put faces to names is a sure sign that’s not happening again. At least I can remember something I heard five minutes ago.
“Dad?”
“Shush. He’s resting.”
“What?” I jerk awake, knowing I had indeed drifted off. “What time is it?” When they tell me, it appears I’ve been asleep for two hours. Jeez. I’m like an old man. I know I’ve aged years which I can’t remember, but I’m not as old as all that.
“You’re going to be tired.” Vanna sits down beside me. “The doctors explained it will take up to six weeks for your brain to get back to normal.”
“Normal? Our Liz?” Ink walks past, pausing to wink at me. “Can’t wait to see that. Will be a fuckin’ first for him, that’s for certain.”
I don’t know why, but something about him pulling my leg seems right.
I ignore the childish urge to show him my finger. “How did you get on at the shop, Cas?”
I notice my son’s eyes brighten. “Mace showed me how to tune up an engine.”
“You like mucking around with bikes?”
“Bikes, cars.” He shrugs. “Sure. I like them. Can’t wait until I can legally drive.”
I notice Vanna stiffen at the word legally and remember the trouble Cas had been in. I quirk a brow at her.
Vanna nods at me, and speaks to him, “Cas, you’ve got to wait. You’ve got to promise me—”
“Too fuckin’ right he does,” a voice bellows.
We all look up to see the VP has overheard. He addresses my son sternly. “You’ve had one pass, kid. Next time, we won’t save your ass. You fuck up again and you’re on your own.”
Cas nods seriously as if this has already been explained to him. Should have been my job, but I still don’t know how to talk to him. Beef eyes him for a moment, seems to read sincerity in his face, then jerks his chin and strides off to do whatever he’d been on his way to get done.
“Lizard, this morning I’ve been doing some thinking. I, we, need to talk to you.”
I raise my eyebrow again. I might have lost my memory, but people starting conversations with the need to talk often signals the topic isn’t going to be what I want to hear.
“Talk then,” I invite her. Is this where she’s going to tell me she doesn’t like the man I’ve become?
“Your memory loss, we don’t know whether it’s permanent, whether it’s going to come back. Even if it does, whether you’ll want to be part of the club, or whether…”
“Whether my body is too fucked up.”
If the flicker of pain crossing her face is anything to go by, I’d indeed put into words what she had more delicately been trying to say. Her look of compassion is too intense to be one that should be shown to a husband by his wife. I should be the strength in this relationship, not her. When her hand covers mine, I almost snatch it away. But she’s got hold of my right, and the darn thing will barely work.
“Liz. Until the swelling goes down, we won’t have any idea about your memory or what you’ll be capable of doing.”
I nod, wondering where she’s going with this.
“Things happened so fast yesterday. I’ve been so tied up with you and your needs, that I’d forgotten one important thing until Vi asked what I was going to do about it.” A look crosses her face as though she can’t believe what she’d done. “Cas needs to go to school. He’s already had a week off. Either he goes back to Denver, or he’ll have to transfer here. I don’t even know what will be involved.”
“Summer break is coming up in a few weeks,” Cas puts in. “It will be best if I continue at my current school until then.”
“What about the friends who got you into trouble last time?” Or was it that he got them into the mess? I wonder whether I’ll ever have the relationship with him where he’ll tell me everything.
I notice Vanna’s face has hardened. “You heard what Beef said. No second chances. Cas keeps his nose out of trouble, or all bets are off.”
“I like Beef and Mace. I like the club,” says Cas. “I don’t want to mess anything up or disappoint them.”
That he hasn’t mentioned disappointing me, doesn’t pass me by. But this is not the time to address it, and if I’m honest, I don’t even know how. But Cas continuing at his current school until summer break makes sense. “So, are we going back to Denver tonight?” Changes. So many changes. I realise I’m comfortable enough to feel relaxed here now, and at least I’m sleeping in my own bed, though I don’t remember it. In Denver, I’ll be in a house I hadn’t had a chance to put into my memory banks either then or now. And unless Vanna doubles up with Cas again, I’ll be sleeping with my wife. Unable to meet any physical expectations, or it’s possible that I’m unwilling.
“We’re going, you’re staying here,” Vanna says fast, like ripping a Band-Aid off. “There’s so many reasons. But we’ll be back at the weekend.”
“No,” I tell her, simply, staring her straight in the eye. I cover her hand with my left one, aware it’s shaking slightly. “Vanna, I can’t lose you now. What if my brain flips again, and it’s you I can’t remember?”
My honesty, my fear, has her throwing herself at me, holding me tight. My left arm clasps her to me.
“You won’t forget me again, Lizard. Weekends will give us a chance to get to know the people we are now. It’s only for six weeks.” She hugs me tightly, then puts distance between us again.
Six weeks, only seeing her two days out of seven? She’s mentioned the length of time I need for my recovery, not just the month I promised to the club. Too long. What if I start to remember myself as a biker? What if I start being tempted by the younger girls? I’ll have to ask her to trust me when I’m not sure whether I’d be able to trust myself. Right now, I’d never dream of being unfaithful, couldn’t believe I’d even think about going with a woman who wasn’t my wife, but for ten years it seems I had no such reservations.
“Vanna, please take me with you, or you and the boy both stay. We’ll sort out his schooling somehow or other.”
Cas is looking from me to Vanna, then he gets up and walks away. His face is unreadable. Guess he doesn’t care what happens between his mom and his dad if he gets his way. Isn’t that the case with teenagers? Aren’t they selfish? Or that’s what I’ve heard.
As my eyes go back to my wife, I realise she’s oblivious to our son leaving us. Perhaps she’s used to his short attention span. Anyway, she’s listing all the reasons why I should stay here. Close to the doctors who treated me, people around all the time. In Denver, she’d need to be out job hunting. Which reminds me, I presume Buzzard, the treasurer would be the one to help me sort out how I’m financially sorted. Technically, I’m away from my job on medical leave, but I doubt I’ve got insurance or will continue to be paid. My bosses are an outlaw MC after all’s said and done.
Which reminds me. “If you stay here, Vanna, you don’t have to look for work. Or didn’t you like the tattoo parlour?”
“That’s not the point, Liz. It’s Cas who’s most important.”
“What about your husband?” I snap.
She throws up her hands. “Don’t make me choose between you,” she warns. “If I could clone myself, I would. You’re recovering from a major surgery, of course I want to be by your side, but you’ve got friends here to care for you.”
“Then move the kid’s school.”
As our discussion has become more heated, I’m staring at her, she’s glaring at me, and neither of us register Cas’s return until he drops into the chair opposite.
There’s a satisfied grin on his face as he announces, “All sorted.”
“What?” we ask simultaneously as our heads swing around.
He shrugs. “Mom stays here with you, Dad, and I go back to Denver and finish the school year. Then we’ve got the summer to decide where we’ll be living.”
“You’re not staying with Jordan,” Vanna starts.
“No,” Cas agrees, smirking. “I’ve just rung Lindy, explained the situation and I’ll be staying with her.” He grimaces slightly. “I think it might be harder than living with you, Mom. She’s already talking about a curfew, going straight home from school, and doing my homework. She made me promise to live by her rules. I’ll be staying there Monday to Friday and come back here at weekends.”
“Who’s Lindy?” I query.
Vanna has pulled her shoulders straight, and the smile on her face is genuine. “She’s my friend, a good friend from Denver. Cas is right, she will be strict with him, so I’ve got no worries there. I didn’t think of asking her.”
“You’ve been doing everything on your own too long, Mom,” Cas puts in rather objectively for a boy of his age. “You never lean on anyone. Lindy was more than happy to help, and pleased Dad’s out of hospital and recovering.”
“She expecting you there today?”
“Yup. Said she’s going to get a roast on later. You can take me whenever you want to. I’ll go repack my bag, again.”
He must have unpacked after we were escorted back to the compound yesterday.
I want to offer to drive him. Fuck, I want to get off this couch without having to work through the logistics of getting my crutches under me. The least I can do is offer to keep my wife company.
“I’ll come with you.”
“No, Liz. I don’t want to take the risk. What if we hit a bump in the road and it hurts your head? You’re tired and should be resting. It’s not just there, it’s back again too, remember. That’s at least four hours driving—”
“Sorted,” Cas says in a singsong voice from right beside me. He looks proud of himself.
I’d seen him headed to the stairs, but it seems he hadn’t made it up them. Beef’s standing next to him with a hand on his shoulder.
It’s the VP who enlightens us as to what they’ve been talking about. “Lizard, whether you remember or not, you’re a member. Cas is your kid. Prospects are there for whatever you want them for. If you need help taking your boots on and off, just ask them, hell got a problem taking your pants off for a shit, they’ll be pulling them down for you. They’ll do whatever you ask. So fuckin’ ask one of them to drive Cas to Denver.”
“Will they mind?” I ask, seeing a solution there. Vanna won’t have to do four hours of driving, and while I don’t like admitting it, staying here resting will be better for me.
“Will they mind taking your pants off so you can crap?” Beef’s grinning widely.
“I meant, fuckin’ taking my kid to Denver,” I growl. “I’m perfectly capable of handling my own shit.”
Beef snorts. “Fuckin’ sure you are, Brother.” He nudges me not so gently on the shoulder. “As for the prospects? If they want their patch bad enough, they won’t say one fuckin’ word of complaint.”
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Vanna
“Are you sure you don’t mind, Lindy?” I say into the phone. It’s a lot to ask of her.
“Of course I don’t. I mind more you didn’t already think to ask me. This is your chance to see if you can get back together with Lizard. There’s only been one person for you,
Vanna, you’ve stayed faithful to him all this time. This gives you a chance to get to know him again without simultaneously having to manage a relationship between him and his son.”
I don’t tell her he’s not been faithful to me. I’m still not totally comfortable with that. Telling myself he didn’t know he had commitments at the time only goes partway to accepting other women have had what I thought was mine alone.
“I’m wondering if I’m doing the right thing,” I admit. “He needs to get to know Cas…”
“He’ll have his chance at the weekends,” she says fast. “Vanna, Cas is a teenager, no more difficult than others his age, but his hormones are running riot right now, you know that. You and Lizard need to see whether you can work things out together. If you can, you can put on a united front. Won’t do Cas any good to have one parent saying he can, and the other he can’t. The way I see it is if Lizard feels pressured to step up and take the parental role, he might take the wrong one as he’s suddenly had an unruly son dumped on him out of the blue. He could be overindulgent, or too strict and push him away. I think you and Lizard concentrating on yourselves for now is better than adding Cas into the mix from the get-go.”
She’s right I suppose. Though I still feel I’m abandoning my son.
“Cas wants this, you know?” Lindy impresses on me. “When he called, he sounded mixed up. He wanted a dad, but he’s got a man he doesn’t know. Worse than that, someone who doesn’t know himself. While Cas is here during the week, it will stabilise him. Apart from not being with you at home, he’ll have his normal routine. At weekends he’ll come to visit you, but he’ll know he’s got an escape route if it gets too much. Don’t worry about him, I won’t go easy on him. He’s agreed to abide by what I say.”
“He’s told me that before too,” I grumble.
She laughs. “You’re his mom, you’re supposed to knock your heads together. I’m his friend, his proxy aunt. He’ll be on his best behaviour with me. I know despite what I say you’re going to be concerned, you’re his mom. But you’re only two hours away. If there are any problems, I’ll give you a call.”
Devil's Spawn: Satan's Devils MC Colorado Chapter #6 Page 31
