I supposed opposites did attract.
I ran my hand over my head, hating how lonely I suddenly felt. How terrified I truly was Mia’s safety. All I wanted was her back in my arms. I would trade the world to get her back. I’d even trade being the leader of The Crows. Let the Carrion Crew have the city, say fuck it, and drive off wherever we could.
Don’t be a dumbass, Jace.
I thought it was the voice of Logic that taunted, letting me know that there was no escaping this that easily, but I was surprised to hear it in my mind in both my father’s and brother’s voices simultaneously. It didn’t matter if the Crows were disbanded or not, the Carrion crew would take their due. And that due involved Mia, involved doing whatever it was they had planned for her. I shivered, closing my eyes shut, telling myself not to go there. I couldn’t risk losing it any more than I already was.
I was too close to breaking again.
It felt so crazy to realize that I’d only been at this point a few weeks ago. That meeting Mia had changed so much so quickly. I’d never imagined I could fall in love so quickly. Even with Anne it had taken time. Hell, one could say it had taken a lifetime! We had been childhood friends; we hadn’t even known for most of our time together that we felt what we’d come to feel for one another. We were well into our late teens before we’d even worked up the guts to express those feelings aloud.
“Made the sex for those first few years really awkward!” I used to say when this subject came up with Anne.
“Oh my… perv!” she’d wail at that, usually landing a playful slap on my arm.
That was the way it almost always played out, at least.
It all seemed so cozy and perfect then.
And yet…
And yet there was always some great divide between us. As kids, we’d always just been kids; it was all we were ever expected to be. But as we grew, expectations changed—Anne was expected to study and learn and explore all that life had to offer. She came from a small, secure place; a box called “normal” that was limiting and boring, sure, but it was also safe. In this box, one was educated, one took jobs, and then one got married and made more ones. And while Anne explored her options in that box, I was shown a world that was almost beyond limits. I was counting more money before I was thirteen than most people saw in their entire lifetime. I was learning how to handle myself in “parties” where more than half the attendees were carrying instruments of death. I shared a dinner table with hookers and hitmen alike. While Anne was raised in a world of limits and expectations, I was shaped into a gang leader.
Then, even knowing the sort of difference lingering between us like a great chasm, Anne had pursued that final stretch of a normal life with me…
And she’d died for it.
How quick had I been to say “fuck normal” after that?
Had I ever not said “fuck normal”?
I lingered on that. I’d always thought that I’d been angry that the box that Anne grew up in had been what I’d resented most—that I hated that I’d never get to know what normal was—but, more and more, I was beginning to realize that what I’d resented was that Anne could never step out of that box; that, no matter what, there’d be that chasm between us. I loved Anne, yes—with all my heart—but what might that chasm have represented for us down the line if T-Built and his vendetta hadn’t intervened?
And what did that mean for me and Mia?
I stared at the Denny’s for a minute longer, letting everything that had happened over the past week roll through me. I had to get in control and that meant I needed to go back. As much as I wanted just to drive across the city, to just let my feelings out with every mile I crossed, it wasn’t what Mia needed. It wasn’t what anybody needed, including myself. I had left the shop thinking that I was doing this for Mia. I chastised myself, knowing full well that this had been a selfish act made out of fear.
I needed to be back.
I needed to help plan.
I needed to save my girl.
My chopper roared back to life, rumbling like a second lover—one that Mia and I both adored—between my thighs.
I ran my palm over the flames painted across the gas tank, petting it like a wild animal—respecting it like one—and said, “Good girl.”
Then I tore out of the parking lot, a rejuvenated feeling pouring through me. I suddenly felt like I could succeed. I wasn’t afraid anymore and damn it felt good. I almost felt like my old self again. The old Jace who’d been strong, confident, not afraid of anything and willing to take whatever happened head-on.
It felt good to be back.
I was ready to show everyone just what kind of leader I could be. I sped across the freeway, seeing that the sun was beginning to set. It had nearly been a full day since Candy had left and we still hadn’t heard back. I planned to give her another few hours, but if things didn’t work out, it would be up to us. Somehow we’d have to figure out where the Carrion crew was setup on our own. I smirked, somehow knowing that it would work out. We’d find them and we’d take those fuckers down.
“Good to be back,” I whispered, not sure who I was whispering to as I shot off towards the shop.
All the same, I felt Logic and Defense and Neutral nodding their non-existent heads in approval. Somewhere in the deeper recesses of my insanity, where nobody ever truly died and everybody was just there, watching me through my eyes, I felt my father and my brother do the same.
“Good,” I said with a smile. “Then we’re all in agreement.”
Then, like the Ghost of Christmas Past, she was standing at the end of the street.
Anne.
Just like she always had before…
Before Mia.
She stood, smiling a faint smile and holding her big, round, pregnant belly with one hand, the other outstretched in my direction.
Just like she always had before…
“But…” I muttered, slamming on the brakes—lingering there, idling, in the middle of the vacant street—and staring at what I knew to be nothing.
Nothing… but everything.
“But,” I said again, “what about Mia.”
And then the ghost—Anne—did something she’d never done before.
Her outstretched and waiting hand closed into a fist, and, as I watched, awestruck, she extended a thumb upwards towards the heavens.
“Go get her,” I heard a long-lost voice chime in my ears.
And that, as they say, was that.
****
As good as I had felt riding back, I somehow felt three times better as I made it to the shop. It was time for action and I could feel that the others would be in agreement as I stepped inside. Danny glanced over at me, looking up from a few pages he had on the desk in the office. On the lower level, I noticed that several of our men were going over our weapons and beginning to suit up. I raised an eyebrow, wondering if we were already more ahead than I’d thought.
“What’s up, Merc?” I asked, raising an eyebrow and pointing my thumb in the direction of where the men were working. “We going somewhere?”
“Soon,” Danny said, shrugging a shoulder as he stood up from the desk. “Nancy said she’d contact soon, didn’t she?”
“Yeah, but…” I started, but then shook my head, there was no time for the pessimistic Jace to come back now. “No, she’ll contact. It’s just a matter of time. She can’t risk being caught, so I’m sure she’s just waiting for the right moment.”
“Huh?” Danny looked up, looking suddenly confused.
“What?” I asked, looking back. “I say something wrong?”
“Are ya… did somethin’ happen? Somethin’… somethin’s changed in you,” Danny said, leaning closer to my face.
“Watch it, or I’ll think you’re trying to kiss me,” I said even as I smirked at him.
“Sorry, but ye’re not my type. Too fuckin’ skinny, for one,” Danny replied, grinning broadly at me. “All the same, I like this new Jace. Better on the ears, at least. Good t
a have ya with us.”
“Good to be back,” I offered, grinning at that.
Of course he’d see the changed I stayed quiet, appreciating just how much Danny had helped me all this time. I opened my mouth, ready to tell him just how thankful I was for all he’d put up with when my phone rang. I quickly pulled it out of my pocket and in one swift motion, I turned the phone to my face, looking down at the screen.
Candy calling…
I smirked up at Danny, who only smiled back knowingly. The fact that she was calling could only mean good news. It was showtime and I could feel my body begin to thrum in anticipation.
I would take down these fuckers once and for all.
I tapped the answer call button and put the phone up to my ear. My heart thrummed with both excitement and terror. The shredded remains of who I’d used to be—“old Jace”?—still screamed at me that nothing was right, that Mia was already dead. It told me to lose hope, to not even bother holding on to any semblance of hope that Mia was still out there for me. I shook it off. It was a trial in self-control, but at that moment it wasn’t one that was about to get the better of me. Refusing to its slimy grip of distracting pessimism take hold of me, I staved it off and forced myself to keep moving forward. I was back and dammit, I planned to stay back.
For Mia.
For myself.
“Hello?” I asked, testing the call first, just in case someone had gotten ahold of Candy’s phone.
“Oh sweet Christ, I’m glad you answered,” she replied, chuckling softly.
“Did you think I wouldn’t?” I asked, genuinely curious.
“Well, a part of me thought that you couldn’t wait out, honestly,” she said, sighing softly. “Thought you decided to run off and try and take matter into your own hands.”
“Ya wouldn’t be wrong normally,” Danny said, laughing softly.
“Danny? That you?” she said. “Good to hear your voice, faggot.”
“Love ya too, Whore,” Danny replied.
“When did…?” I glanced over at Danny, wondering just when Candy and him had become BFFs. I decided I’d figure it out later. I needed to know what she’d found out. “So, can you tell us what’s going on? Did you find out where they are keeping Mia?”
“Hell yeah, I did! I struck gold, I tell ya! Suck the right cock and you know,” she began, chuckling softly to herself. “Anyway, they got Mia holed up in the basement of this fancy-ass house in the suburbs. It’s in a cul-de-sac, right? But get this: they own all the houses. Can you believe that? An entire cul-de-sac—like, what you’d normally see little old married couples and creepy church-goers—and it’s owned by the goddam Carrion Crew! But that’s the problem, too; they got all those houses and such, and that probably means they’re all filled. That entire street could be one giant military base, Jace. There’s no knowing what they got going on there.”
“Shit,” I groaned, running my hand over my face. “If you had to say, how many people do you think they have?”
“I don’t know. About ten-or-so houses—I didn’t really know to count them all when I had the chance; didn’t find out the truth about the neighborhood ‘til after—but that sounds about right. If each one’s got, what, half-a-dozen, give-or-take… hmm, probably over fifty men. I’d bet more than that. Hundred’s probably pushing it, though. Maybe a bit more, I didn’t see them all, obviously,” she said, sounding worried. “But that’s not all, Jace. I mean, I hate to put it this way, but that part’s practically the good news!”
“What the… how is that the good news?” I demanded.
“I talked with Mia, and—”
“Oh fuck! Is she okay?” I blurted, panicking.
“Well… uh, sure?” she answered, not sounding positive. “She’s not hurt, if that’s what you’re asking, but… well, she says they’re planning to sell her off. Like some kinda fuckin’ whore-auction or something. And from the sounds of things, they are planning this soon.”
“Fuck,” I said, glancing over at Danny. “This happens tonight then. Candy, can you get somewhere safe?”
“Fuck that,” she said, practically yelling through the phone. “These bastards have my best friend, I’m not just gonna hide away while you and your guys all get to play hero. Bring me a few extra pieces and I’ll rock those fuckers sideways—gangsta-style—and pop caps ‘til I’m flooding my panties!”
I blinked at that. “Do you even know how to use a gun?” I asked, deciding not even to try and fight Candy’s choice. She wouldn’t take no for an answer, judging from how emotional she’d gotten from me even suggesting she hide during the chaos. While a part of me worried about what kind of danger I was putting Mia’s best friend in, the other part of me was impressed at just how devoted she was to Mia.
“Damn right I do,” she said, sounding almost boastful. “Used to go hunting with my dad all the time. I’m a damn good shot, too! Put a bullet right between the eyes of a ten-point buck from nearly two-hundred yards.”
I was certain at least a part of that story was an exaggeration, but I wasn’t prepared to guess and, quite frankly, I didn’t care. We wouldn’t be hunting deer—ten-pointers or otherwise—and, provided she didn’t shoot one of mine, I couldn’t care less where she put the bullets.
“Good,” I said. “I’ll get Danny to make sure to pack you something that won’t be too different from the hunting rifle you used. Where are you right now?”
“I just left the area; told them I’d gotten a call to go out and handle a John—playing the whole ‘gotta make that money, honey’-routine,” she said, sighing. “The two running the scene made like they didn’t trust me, so they told me I wasn’t going anywhere ‘til I sucked ‘em both off.”
“Jeez,” I grumbled. “So what’d you do?”
“Well, I just said I left, didn’t I?” she said with an impatient sigh. “So I guess that means I sucked ‘em both off.”
“Oh my…” I gasped, suddenly worried for her. “Are you okay?”
“Why wouldn’t I be?” she asked with an audible sigh. “You think I got this far ‘cause I couldn’t handle a couple of shots in the mouth? Fuck, Jace, grow up! We’re doing this for Mia, aren’t we?”
“Well… yeah, I guess that’s—”
“So that’s that,” she declared. “I bet if you had to suck a dick to get to her right now you’d be on your knees doing the whole Brokeback Mountain scene, so quit the virginal routine, put on your gunnin’ trousers, and get your asses out here! I’m sending you the address to a nearby neighborhood. We can meet there and then move in.”
“That’s…” I blinked, “That’s actually a really good plan.”
“Yeah, not such a dumb whore, right?” she said with a laugh.
“Never said you were, Candy. We’ll be there soon. We shouldn’t be too long, but stay hidden at least until I get there. Don’t get into any unnecessary trouble.”
“Look who’s talking there,” she laughed.
“Yeah, I guess I deserved that,” I laughed, rubbing my neck.
I knew what she was referencing. How fast I’d went out to where T-Built had been. I’d nearly lost everything in going there. I’d even gone so far as to lock Mia away, knowing she’d have either tried to stop me or, worse, gone with me. Even still, she’d ended up getting there and she’d been the one to save my life. I squeezed my eyes shut, thinking about Mia made me that much more impatient. I needed to prepare, needing to get to Mia as soon as I could.
“Alright, see you soon,” Candy said.
“See you,” I replied.
With that, the phone went silent as Candy hung up. Not even a few seconds later, she’d texted me an address. I turned to tell Danny what the plan was and saw that he’d left the room. I headed out to where the others had been preparing and saw that he’d joined them. He’d begun to load guns into his own duffle bag and I raised my eyebrow.
“Seems kind of a pain in the ass to pack them that way,” I said, heading down the stairs as I watched the others cont
inue to arm themselves.
“This is just so I don’t gotta ride with a gun strapped to my back,” Danny said, rolling his eyes. “I ain’t no dummy.”
“No, no you’re not,” I agreed, glancing around at the others and took a deep breath, knowing I needed to give them some kind of speech.
I stopped halfway down the stairs and cleared my throat. I wanted them all to know just appreciative I was, but I didn’t want to sugarcoat the dangers of just what we had planned. They deserved to know everything up front.
“Listen up, folks!” Danny called out for me.
All at once all their eyes were on me.
I froze for a moment, suddenly feeling unsure about everything. Closing my eyes for a brief moment, I remembered my father. Remembered just how sure he’d been about everything. A memory of him telling me that I would be a fine leader, that he knew I had it in me to run the Crows how they needed to before he had passed away. Even though my brother had been meant to run the gang, it seemed that my father had already known what was going to happen. All at once, I had become in charge and yet, I hadn’t been a good leader.
Now that was going to change.
Starting today, I would show them—show everyone—that I was meant to be a leader; that the cruel turn of fate that took my brother out of the game wasn’t going to represent the moment the Crows were doomed to fall. And while I couldn’t say that I’d ever come to replace my father or my brother, I’d make damn sure to do their memories proud. I wouldn’t hide anymore, wouldn’t let Danny do everything for me any longer.
I took a deep breath, staring up at the crowd and saw the look they were giving me. Respect and pride mingled in all of their expressions, a look, I imagined, that they’d worn when looking to my father or my brother.
Riding On Fumes: Bad Boy Motorcycle Club Romance (The Crow's MC Book 2) Page 27
