He moves to the side and I waste no time in leaving.
Chapter Twelve
Slade
I desperately wanted to follow her out and stop her from leaving. I stood rooted in place going back on everything that had happened in the last twenty minutes. This morning had been the best time in my life and now it is lost to me.
I have watched my brothers fall in love and I thought I was close to it myself, that I finally had my time for happiness but now that happiness has left.
I could hear my brothers talking behind me.
“We’re gonna have to make sure she doesn’t go talkin’ to the wrong people,” Sparky states.
“She needs to know everything that happened,” Bonnie adds in.
“This is fuckin’ bullshit,” I yell, and everyone falls silent.
I kick the chair in front of me in frustration and it flies across the bar.
“Maybe I should go and look for her, try to explain properly?” Alannah asks Cas.
By the way Kristen was looking at Alannah earlier, I think she’s the last person Kristen wants to see.
“No, I’ll go.” I say, taking deep breaths.
The ride back to my house was the longest of my life, I didn’t know what to expect but as it happens, I needn’t worry because she isn’t here. I check every room and nothing. All her belongings are still here but she and Zachery isn’t. I waited for an hour before leaving again. I rode around town to see if I could see her car parked anywhere but still no luck. The motel was still closed so she wouldn’t be there. Finally after a couple of hours I return to the clubhouse.
“Anything?” Cas asks as I walk into the bar.
“Nothing, her things are still there but I can’t find her anywhere in town. Has she been back here?” I ask, knowing she wouldn’t have been.
“She needs to be found brother and if you’re the one who wants to talk to her then you’re gonna have to find her fast. We can’t take any chances of that night being dragged up again.”
I know Cas is right…for the club he is right. Kristen knows next to nothing about club life and that’s my fault. She wanted to know more and I held back fearing she wouldn’t like what she heard. I was right about that and I’ve lost her anyway.
“I’ll find her and I’ll find her by tonight,” I assure him, and set about booting my laptop up that I brought from the house.
Knowing she doesn’t like carrying cash I wait for her to use her card.
It’s been six hours since she left and I haven’t got a hit on them yet. The more time that passes the more I worry about them. If she has gone to the cops then it won’t be good for the club, not that we were the ones to end his life but still, it’s attention we don’t need. Right now though, I couldn’t give a fuck about the club. I just want to know they’re okay, wherever they are.
“If it’s any help, I don’t think it would’ve took much for her to leave, the club scared her.”
I looked up to see Bonnie standing in front of me.
“I know you mean well Bon, but right now I just want to be on my own until I find her.”
I stare at the laptop screen until she walks away and breathe a sigh a relief when I get a hit. Finally.
She’s booked into a motel in the next town over from Willows Peak.
I don’t bother logging off and slam the screen down and shove the laptop back in its bag and hand it to Cas when I make my way over to him.
“I’ve found them, I’ll be back soon.”
I don’t offer up her location and Cas doesn’t ask.
“Try to find out who told her. I’m thinkin’ our invisible enemy has been workin’ today,” he says.
“I will, I’ll call as soon as I know anything.”
I’m out the door and in my truck before anyone else can speak to me or offer to come along.
During the hour long drive, I plan to tell her everything. Every detail of the night Billy died, every detail she wants to know about me and the club. Hoping this helps her understand us, understand me more.
I spot her car at the far end of the car lot and park up next to it.
Not wanting to attract attention to my presence here I take a chance and knock on the door in front of her car. When a fat, aging bald man answers in a towel I don’t need to ask if Kristen is there. The room on the left side is in darkness but the room on the right side has a soft glow shining from under the door. I choose the door on the right side and knock gently in case Zachery is asleep.
“Who is it?” she calls out quietly.
My hands begin trembling at the sound of her voice. Assuming she won’t open the door to me, I lie.
“It’s the manger.”
I’m hoping she can’t make out my voice through the closed door.
I hear the chain sliding across and brace myself.
My stomach drops when I see her eyes are red and swollen, full of pain which turn to fear when she sees it’s me.
It is that fear I want her to forget. I need her to know she has nothing to fear from me.
“How did you find us? No, wait…I don’t want to know.”
She goes to slam the door shut before I say anything but I am faster and put my foot in the doorway. I don’t want to make a scene on the doorstep so I push past her and shut the door behind me.
“I want you to leave, now.”
For a moment I can’t say anything. The sight of her in front of me has me tied in knots, I want to comfort her but she isn’t going to let me. I make it clear I won’t go near her and stay as close to the door as possible as she hovers near Zachery asleep in the cot.
“I can’t leave until you know the full truth and if you want to know anything else to do with me and the club I will tell you.” I say, hoping she agrees to listen.
“Please don’t be afraid of me, you really have no idea how much I won’t harm you or Zach,” I add.
Taking one more look between Zach and I she signals to the table in the opposite corner of the room, where I take a seat and she reluctantly joins me. My hands are aching to hold hers. It’s killing me to think that tonight was meant to be just the two of us, not held up arguing in here.
“I’m sorry you had to find out about Billy like that.”
“You’re only sorry I found out at all,” she snaps, interrupting me.
“That’s not true. At first we didn’t feel you needed to know what really happened. It was painful enough for you to hear he died in an accident. Also, how he died would bring heat on the club that we can’t afford and we didn’t know you wouldn’t go straight to the cops.”
“He didn’t just die, he was murdered Slade. You all kept that from me,” she points out.
“And tonight I’m not going to keep anything from you, ask me anything and I’ll tell you the whole truth.”
“I want the whole truth on how Billy was…” she can’t bring herself to say the word murdered again.
“If at any time you want me to stop, just say,” I begin, I wait for her nod and carry on, “Billy had been prospecting for us for about six weeks before Alannah returned home from college. Michael, he was our president at the time and Alannah’s uncle, made it known that she wouldn’t be around the club anymore. You see, she grew up in the club. Her father was the original president of the Lost Souls. The club was her life and she didn’t go quietly when Michael said she had to leave. He put her up at the cabin and posted Billy to watch over her. We were having a lot of shit go down with a rival MC and life was getting out of control. None of us could understand why Michael had cast her out on her own away from us who could protect her in numbers.” I paused for a moment and looked up, Kristen was listening intently so I carried on, “Alannah had asked me to look into a friend she was worried about, it turns out that friend was Bonnie. By the time I found she was Hunter’s daughter, Hunter was our enemy’s president, Bonnie was already on her way to see Alannah or so we thought. In actual fact, it was Hunter and his club that turned up. By the time we arrived at the c
abin to warn them as nobody was answering their phones, they had already been and gone and took Alannah with them.”
“What about Billy?” she asks impatiently.
“As we pulled up to the cabin, he was dragging himself across the gravel to his truck. He was beaten to near death and he was still trying to fuckin’ save her. You have to know he wasn’t alone when he died, we were all there. He died before we could get him help.” I stop when I hear her gasp.
“So he died for nothing, they still got her anyway?”
“To us he died for nothing, but to Michael, it was exactly what he wanted. We found out later that day that he used Alannah as bait and Billy was collateral damage.”
“What happened to Alannah?” she asks.
“I tracked her down to one of their warehouses a few hours away. If I close my eyes I can still hear the constant gun shots and smell the blood. It was a fight none of us will ever forget. We shot our way in and took them all out and in turn they took four of our brothers out and injured many more, myself included. The scar on my arm is where I caught by a bullet, luckily it was a flesh wound. We all covered Cas and Sparky as they searched for Alannah. When they found her…she was tied up and had a noose tied around her neck. She had been beaten badly and was bleeding everywhere. Hunter was with her but all he wanted was Michael. When he had him he made sure Cas and Sparky wouldn’t intervene and left her to hang in front of their eyes.” I pause again because I can’t speak around the suffocating block in my throat. I take a couple of deep breathes and carry on.
“I’m not so sure how it happened but Hunter got the better of Michael and killed him, then Pope killed Hunter. Cas and Sparky managed to get Alannah free and by the time they brought her out the fight had been won. If you’d of seen her when we got back you’d still be having nightmares.”
“Cas said Alannah still has them.”
“She was doing well but since you showed up they started coming back. Her nightmares aren’t about what happened to her as such, they’re about Billy. To this day she holds her guilt close in her heart for him. They became close in the time they spent together and she actually saw them attacking him for trying to help her.”
Kristen closes her eyes and a stray tear falls down her cheek.
“She shouldn’t feel guilty, it was hardly her fault.”
“No, it was Michael’s fault,” I agree with her.
We both sit in silence while she processes everything I’ve told her. I sit staring at her and she sits staring down at her hands.
“Can I ask you something?” I ask her, unable to stand the silence any longer.
She doesn’t answer but she nods her head.
“Will you tell me who spoke to you at the store?”
“Why? Will you kill them?” she spits out.
“I’m not going to lie, I fuckin’ want to but no…I’m not going to kill them.”
She exhales a shaky breath and finally lifts her head.
“I had just come out of the store and was loading the groceries into the trunk when this man appears from out of nowhere, he tells me his message and leaves again. Looking back, I don’t think he knew what was going on either, he said he was being paid to do it.”
So someone else is behind this shit storm?
She goes quiet again and the silence drags.
“Please tell me what you’re thinking?” I plead with her.
“I was thinking I should apologize to Alannah and Bonnie for the way I treated them earlier. Now I understand I feel terrible.”
My hopes rise.
“Does this mean you’ll come back to Willows Peak to apologize in person?”
“I can’t come back,” she says, almost regretfully.
“Why? I’ve told you what happened.”
“You’ve killed people Slade, how could you think I’d be okay with that?”
“In my world darlin’, an eye for an eye is an unwritten rule. I’ve only killed in defence or in rescue. The people I’ve taken out are no better than scum. You’ve got to stop thinking my world is the same as yours, it’s not.”
“Exactly, you just said it yourself. Our worlds are two different things and I’m afraid to be with you in yours.” She admits.
“The only reason Alannah was taken was because we weren’t there to protect her. Do you really think if we were under threat I would let you or Zach out of my sight? I would do anything and I mean anything for the both of you. You’d never have to be afraid with me.”
She exhales loudly and it rips me to see her body shaking.
“Why do I believe you?” she whispers.
“Because I’m telling you the fuckin’ truth. Will you come back with me?” I urge.
No longer able to sit still she stands and begins pacing the room. I force myself to remain seated and give her room to think.
“I fell for you, not your lifestyle. For the first time in a long time I was happy and that was because of you.”
I’m standing in front of her and before I can blink I pull her my arms. The rush I feel when she doesn’t push me away is euphoric.
“I can still make you happy, that’s all I want to do darlin’,” I tell her.
“Then we have a problem, because I can’t go back to Willows Peak,” she mumbles into my chest.
“Do you still want to be mine?” I ask her with trepidation.
“Even after everything I’ve heard…yes I do.”
“Then I’ll make it work.”
“How?”
“I don’t know yet but we’ve got all night to think of something.” I assure her.
“Does that mean you’re staying tonight?”
“I’m not going anywhere,” I promise.
She pulls away keeping hold of my hand and leads us to the bed. After a quick re-position, she’s curled up against me.
“You said you’d tell me anything tonight, does that still apply?”
“Of course, what do you want to know?” I ask curiously.
“I already know you’re good with all things technical but what do you actually do for the club?”
Keeping my promise of answering any questions she has, I explain,
“I can hack into mostly any database undetected which comes in handy sometimes. I keep an eye on the club’s finances. Basically I use technology to keep the club safe.”
“And when technology doesn’t work, guns do?” she snorts.
“Sometimes,” I admit.
“Do you carry a gun?” she asks, trailing her finger back and forth on my arm.
“Most of the time,” I mutter.
She leans up on her elbow and frowns at me.
“How come I’ve never noticed?”
“Probably because I don’t wave it around and when I’m at home I always keep it away and hidden.”
Satisfied with my answer she curls back up against me.
“This isn’t how I imagined tonight to be like when I left the house this morning,” I say, stroking her soft hair.
“Me neither,” she agrees, “Slade?”
“Yeah?”
“How do you seriously see this working when I don’t want to go back?”
“Do you want the truth?” I ask, knowing she will.
“Of course,” she giggles.
“I’m hoping over time you’ll want to come back. The Lost Souls aren’t just a part of my life, they are my life just like my mom and sister. I’ll pray like fuck that one day you’ll see the good in them and that it’s not always bad. The night Alannah was taken she had over fifty brothers ready to die to save her. That night was pure violence but that isn’t what we’re about. We’re about family and loyalty. With us you don’t get one without everyone else…protection. Everything else is mine,” I chuckle.
“I don’t want to feel like I need protecting though.”
“I know you don’t. Look at it this way, how many times do you watch the news and hear reports on crime?” I ask.
“Nearly every day.”
&nb
sp; “Not everyone has to belong to an MC to commit crime, your average Joe on the street can be worse. What I’m trying to say is, just because we don’t live by the law sometimes doesn’t mean we go looking for trouble twenty-four seven.”
I keep quiet to let her mull over what I’ve said.
“What will we do until I’m ready to go back?”
“We can date,” I laugh, “Isn’t that what you wanted?”
“You’d really do that?” she asks surprized.
I slide down the bed until we are both on our sides and facing one another.
“Do you listen to a word I say?” I tease her lightly, “I would ride across the country just to kiss those lips if that’s what made you smile,” I say, tracing her bottom lip with my thumb. “You don’t want to go back yet, that’s fine, just expect me to follow you everywhere you go until you do.”
“Before you showed up I was thinking about going to see my mom.”
“That would work for now,” I say, ending in a yawn.
“You should get some sleep,” she tells me.
“If you’re leaving me in the morning, I don’t want to waste time sleeping when I could be with you.”
“I thought you said you’d come and see us?”
“I did,” I growl, as if I would go back on my word.
“Then the morning won’t be goodbye will it,” she smiles, “Get some sleep and in the morning I might even let you buy us breakfast.”
“You can have anything you damn well want.”
She moves in closer and kisses me softly before turning around with my arm around her waist, her back flush against my chest. I half turn and reach out to turn the lamp off.
“Goodnight Slade,” she whispers into the darkness.
“Night darlin’.”
I had no intention of wasting time by sleeping whilst I have her in my arms but as soon as I heard her relaxed, sleeping breaths, my eyes closed and I was gone.
When my eyes shot open I forgot where I was until I caught the vanilla scent of Kristen’s hair. The time on the bedside table clock read a quarter to six.
Lifting my head to peer over at Zach I see he is still fast asleep in his cot.
Biker Bound: The Lost Souls MC Series Page 12
