by Mari Carr
“Of course not. The thing is,” she lowered her voice and leaned closer, “I wasn’t completely honest with you about Tucker. He and I dated in high school.”
“You dated Tucker Riley?” She saw a light bulb go on. “All those Sundays we sat and watched the games together, you weren’t watching because you liked football, were you?”
“I was watching Tucker.”
That answer was going to reveal more than she cared to Tucker, to Carl, to Lorelie—who’d left the dance floor, clearly ready to step in to defend Lela if necessary.
The wind went out of Carl’s sails, his chest deflating. “I see.” And she could see that he did. Lela’s throat clogged up and she found it difficult to breathe. She took no joy in hurting Carl, but that was exactly what she’d done.
Carl walked away without another word and the phones disappeared, the gossipmongers clearly disappointed.
“I need to leave,” Lela said to Lorelie, pointedly ignoring Tucker. She couldn’t face him right now. She was fighting back tears and she refused to shed them in public.
Lorelie nodded. “Okay.”
“I’ll drive you,” Tucker said.
Lela started to shake her head, but Tucker stopped the motion, his fingers on her jaw, forcing her to look at him. “I’m driving you.”
“More manhandling?” She was trying for levity, trying to escape the heaviness of the moment, but the quivering in her voice betrayed her sadness.
He nodded, and then took her hand. They walked to his car without speaking. She felt numb as he opened the passenger door for her. Lela sat slowly, her head falling back against the headrest.
Tucker didn’t speak as he started the car. For several quiet moments, they sat in the parking lot. Lela sensed Tucker was fighting back some emotions of his own. She had seen his face after Carl’s cruel words. He’d been ready to go to war.
Finally, he turned to face her. “I don’t know where you live.”
She smiled. “Take a right. I have a little house on Casper Lake. You remember how to get there?”
“Yep.” He put the car into gear and drove in silence. It was the third time she’d seen him since his return to Quinn. It felt like a million years had passed since the last time they’d ridden in a car together like this—him taking her home after a date—and yet it seemed so natural to be here again.
They continued to drive in silence. Lela was grateful for the quiet. It gave her time to try to gather her thoughts. As they got closer to her house, she started giving him directions. “Take a left here on Hollins Drive. I’m the third house on the right.”
Tucker pulled into her driveway, and then turned the car off. Her mind whirled as she tried to do the right thing. If only her damn hormones weren’t telling her how much fun the wrong thing could be.
He opened his car door. “I’ll walk you to your front door.”
“Tucker. You’re not coming inside with me.”
He chuckled softly. “Come on, L.B. Just to the front door. I promise.”
She opened her own door and met him at the hood of the car. He grasped her hand, holding it as they walked down the little path that led to her porch. She loved the warmth of his hand, the strength in his grip. While she recognized so many similarities between this man and the boy she’d loved so long ago, there was no denying he was also essentially a stranger. There were parts of this older Tucker that were unknown to her and she longed to explore them, get to know the man he’d become.
Lela tucked that idea away as she searched for her house key in her purse. Once she found it, she thanked Tucker for the ride. She tried to make her tone dismissive, hoping Tucker would make this easy, give her a bye tonight. She wasn’t thinking clearly and she wasn’t feeling particularly strong. It wouldn’t take much effort on his part to get inside.
“Did you break up with Carl because of me?”
She was surprised by his question. She shook her head. “No. Not at all.”
He didn’t press her for more. Instead he accepted her response easily.
Despite that, she felt compelled to add more. “I realize the timing looks suspicious.”
“Not really. I just wanted to be sure.”
“I’m not the same girl I used to be, Tuck. I don’t conjure fantasies; expect to create happy endings out of thin air believing that love and determination are enough. I’m glad to see you again and I’m sure there’s a day of reckoning somewhere in our future where we’ll have to talk about the way things ended last time. But don’t worry about that kiss at the ranch. I have zero expectations about that or us. It was just a kiss.”
His expression darkened slightly. “No. It wasn’t.”
“Tucker—”
“You’re right, Lela. We’re going to talk. We’re going to sit down and hash out all that crap that went down twelve years ago. I appreciate you being honest with me, so I’ll give you the same. I think it’s fucking sad that you don’t believe love is enough to get you what you want. And I know I’m the person who stole that from you. I’m sorry.”
She shook her head, tried to interject. “That’s not what I meant. I—”
Tucker took her face in his hands and bent forward, pressing his forehead against hers. She could feel the heat of his breath as he spoke.
“You were the last person on Earth I ever wanted to hurt. And I did it anyway. You deserve to be happy.”
She released a long sigh and closed her eyes briefly. “Life doesn’t give us what we deserve, Tucker. It doesn’t work that way. We get what we get, and then we figure out how to live with it. That’s what I’ve done. And I’m happy. Honest.”
She lifted her face when he suddenly released her. She’d thought the words would lighten what had become a heavy moment. Instead, something sad flashed in his eyes—and realization struck her. Tucker’s trip home wasn’t as simple as he made it out to be. She should have known the second she saw him in Sally’s Diner. It was so obvious to her now.
But why was he here? Because of her? His father?
“Why are you home, Tucker?”
That same pregnant pause, the one that told her he was about to lie, followed. “I told you. To help Coach out.”
She wanted to press him, but Tucker didn’t give her a chance. Instead, he took the key from her hand and unlocked her door. Then, he offered her a chaste kiss that was no less beautiful for its simplicity. She felt it all the way to her toes.
“I’ll see you soon, L.B.” He walked away and was almost to his car before she found her voice again.
“Good night.” She waved. He gave her a crooked grin and a wave and then he was in the car and gone once more.
Funny how his goodbyes never got any easier.
Chapter Four
Tucker walked into Pitchers for the second time a couple days later. After running into Lela on Friday night, he’d gone back to the hotel and kicked himself for being twenty kinds of fool. He found it very difficult to keep his hands off her anytime they were together, but the last thing Lela Whitacre needed in her life was another hit and run from him.
He’d returned to Coach’s ranch the next morning and worked his ass off, hoping to gain some freaking control of his damn hormones while still seeking some answers to his problems. Instead, all he had to show for a weekend of hard work were stiff muscles and sunburn on his shoulders. So much for Coach’s advice. He hadn’t figured out a damn thing.
Joel waved him over. The bar was much less crowded tonight than it had been on Friday. No band played, so an ancient jukebox tucked against one wall provided the music. No one danced on the makeshift dance floor. Tonight, the bar’s main activities were quiet conversations over pitchers of beer and a few guys shooting pool on a table that had seen better days. There appeared to be a stack of cocktail napkins under one foot to level the thing.
He forced a smile as he joined Joel, Oakley and several other old teammates at a large table. Joel had decided they needed a proper reunion, instead of the rushed attempts to catch
up as they took shifts doing all the backbreaking work required to keep the ranch running effectively.
Tucker had searched for a reason not to come, not ready to field a lot of questions about the upcoming training camp and season. But in the end, he decided to put on his game face and make an appearance because when it came down to it, he really wanted this time with his old friends. He’d missed these guys a lot over the years.
He grabbed a seat between Jackson Brady and Wade Bennett. Like him, they’d come to town to help out Coach. Several of the other guys at the table—like Joel and Carter—had never left Quinn.
Tucker pointed to the beer in front of them. “What’s on tap?”
Jackson held up his glass. “It’s Quinn, Tuck. What do you think is on tap?”
They laughed as they said “Bud” in unison. Tucker had stopped drinking when he noticed alcohol seemed to trigger his headaches, but tonight he wasn’t going to say no. He was nervous about this reunion.
Sadie came over with a new pitcher and an icy-cold glass for Tucker. Sadie was only a couple years older than them and had been the object of every boyhood crush for the men at the table. She’d been homecoming queen her senior year and as a hormone-driven gang of unruly teen boys, they’d lusted after her with a desire that bordered on zealous fervor for most of their high school years. “This one’s on the house. It’s damn good to see y’all in Quinn again. This town has been hurting for hot guys ever since you all left.”
Oakley clutched his heart, feigning injury at her joke as Joel said, “Hey, take it easy there. A few of us at this table have been here all along.”
Sadie laughed. “Oh, I’m perfectly aware of that.”
Oakley leaned back in his chair. “You really know how to hurt the ones you love, Sadie.”
“Is that what this feeling is?” she teased. “I thought it was indigestion.”
Sadie’s family had been running Pitchers for decades. Before Tucker could push the thought away, he recalled it was Sadie’s dad, Nelson, who’d called Tucker’s mom to pick up his dad the night she was killed. He certainly didn’t blame Nelson for making that phone call. He knew exactly whose shoulders carried the weight of his mother’s death. So far, Tucker had been fortunate not to run into his old man. However, he suspected that luck would run out the longer he stayed in Quinn.
Wade threw Sadie a charming smile along with a word of thanks for the free beer. Wade had made quite a smash on the country music scene after leaving Quinn, though it had been a few years since he’d had a hit. Tucker always got a kick out of hearing one of Wade’s songs on the radio, never failing to point out to whoever he was with that he’d played high school ball with the singer.
It had become a running joke with his current teammates. Whenever one of Wade’s songs came on, Tucker reminded them that he knew Wade. The guys would always feign annoyance, then one of them would launch into an impersonation of Tucker, retelling how Quinn High School won the state championship when Tucker has passed a lateral to Carter who’d run it into the end zone for the touchdown that tied the game. It was Wade, the kicker, who'd come out on the field in the final seconds of the fourth quarter and scored the winning point.
Jackson filled up everyone’s glasses and they lifted them, offering cheers to Sadie. Sadie returned to the bar after a quick wink at Joel and Oakley. Tucker wondered briefly about the obvious flirtation going on between the three of them.
Before he could ask Joel about it, Wade leaned over to speak to him. “You ready for this season? Everybody and their brother seem to think this is the year you take your team all the way to the Super Bowl.”
Tucker had prepared himself for this. He gave Wade the answer he’d rehearsed on the way over, talking about a few of the other players on the team and agreeing that he thought they had the potential to make it to the big game this year. He truly did believe that. It was one of the things making his decision so difficult.
Wade and Carter started arguing about who the greatest running back in the NFL was. Tucker grinned, then let them continue to fight it out without him.
“What about you?” Tucker said to Jackson, relieved that he’d managed to dodge any real questions about his appearance in Quinn. “I understand you’ve only been back a few days and you’re already ruffling some feathers around here.”
Jackson sighed and shrugged. “What else is new?”
Jackson had run into some trouble during their senior year. Enough that it had gotten him kicked off the team, but from what Tucker had seen the past few days, Jackson had really turned himself around, started doing some good stuff.
“What’s this football camp thing about?” Tucker asked.
“You’ve heard about my camp in Omaha?”
“Everybody has. Coach is all about the one you’re planning to start here,” Joel said.
“It’s awesome. But it’s not football,” Jackson said. “It’s actually a ranch. My ranch. I take at-risk kids and bring them to the ranch to give them a safe place where they can work to earn their keep, learn about being part of a team, and make something with their own two hands.”
“No shit?” Oakley asked. “You’ve got punk city kids working as ranch hands?”
Jackson quickly explained about the ranch and the program he’d put together.
Tucker was impressed by Jackson’s plans. “If you need anything, let me know,” Tucker said. “I’d be happy to get involved. Come by and see the kids. Maybe donate money or something?”
Jackson’s eyebrows rose. “Seriously?”
“Sure. You’re one of my teammates, man.”
Jackson was clearly surprised by the offer. “That would be great. I really appreciate that. The kids would love it. I was thinking of seeing if Coach would want to come over and help out some too. I could keep an eye on him so he didn’t overdo it, but I know he misses coaching and, honestly, a lot of this is just like coaching. Seeing where the kids are going wrong, correcting them, giving them objectives and helping them dig deep to meet them.”
Carter and Wade had apparently agreed to disagree and Wade leaned closer. “What are you all talking about? That camp thing of Jackson’s?”
Jackson shook his head. “How the hell does everyone know about this?”
Joel grinned. “It’s Quinn. News is rare so when it hits, it spreads like wildfire.”
Tucker chuckled. “I think inviting Coach is a great idea.” Then he began comparing his current NFL coach to Coach Carr, and the conversation took off as the guys all reminisced about their favorite Coach stories. They polished off three more pitchers as they laughed, joked and teased as if twelve years had never passed.
For the first time in ages, Tucker felt more like his old self than he had since that nasty tackle in January that had thrown his life into a tailspin.
He wondered why he’d avoided Quinn for so long. In a world filled with groupies who sucked up to him, he found himself constantly questioning the motives of the people around him. He was used to women who were drawn to him because of his money and profession. The same was true of the men he’d met. Rich investors, CEOs, men with more money and power than sense. Men who thought it was cool to invite him to their parties, so they could brag about being friends with someone famous.
By comparison, these guys were genuinely happy to see him. They shared a past. With them, he was just plain old Tucker Riley, the guy they voted most athletic and who’d burned his initials into the practice field with a blowtorch he’d lifted from shop class on a dare. He’d paid for that prank dearly. Coach Carr had shaken his head and explained why it was damn stupid to put your own initials in graffiti. As his punishment, Tucker had to buy and plant the grass seed to cover the singed earth, watering it as well as mowing and chalking the lines on that particular field for the rest of the school year.
Suddenly Jackson was up out of his chair, tossing money onto the table. “Hey guys, I gotta get going.”
And just like that, he was gone.
“What’s up w
ith him?” Wade asked.
Tucker shrugged, wondering the same thing.
Joel returned from the bar with yet another pitcher as a few of the guys got up to play a game of pool. Joel claimed the seat Jackson vacated.
“What’s up with you and Lela? History repeating itself?”
Tucker shook his head. God. He hoped not. The ending to that history wasn’t one he wanted to revisit, but he wasn’t sure it could be avoided if he let things continue to heat up.
Unfortunately, it was only his head that understood. The rest of him was all for throwing caution to the wind and getting Lela back in bed. “Nothing’s going on. I’m not in Quinn to stay. She knows that. We’re just catching up, getting reacquainted. Sort of like you and me and the guys are doing tonight.”
It wasn’t exactly the truth, but Tucker hadn’t come clean with anyone but Coach about his reasons for returning home. He was getting pretty good at telling lies, though he hated doing it. Tucker wasn’t sure why he hadn’t told his friends about his injury or the decision he was facing. Maybe he was afraid they’d look at him with pity. Or perhaps he was simply tired of hearing everyone’s two-cents’ worth.
With the exception of Coach, every person he’d talked to about whether or not he should return had expressed strong feelings one way or the other. Tucker hadn’t understood why all that unwanted advice had rubbed him the wrong way until Coach explained why he wouldn’t tell him what to do. None of those people truly understood what Tucker was going through. They didn’t know what made him tick any more than he knew what made them tick. So how could they say do this or do that with such assurance that it was the right thing?
Wade leaned closer. “Hey, Tuck. Heads-up.”
Tucker looked at his friend curiously, then caught sight of what Wade had seen. His father was walking over to their table. From the stagger in his step, Tucker could tell his dad was three sheets to the wind.
He’d known this day was coming. He’d tried to mentally prepare himself for it. But now that it was here, he was overwhelmed by the desire to walk away. He had nothing to say to his dad. At least, nothing that wouldn’t end in an argument or bloodshed.
