Elizabeth walked into the sitting room but stopped the second she saw him. He was at a loss for words as well. Instead of looking across the room at the tired and worn-out princess he expected to find, he was looking at his Elli. It was as if four years disappeared and they were standing in that little cabin in Honduras where the sound of waves crashing against the sand lulled them to sleep every night. Their only care was deciding between mango and papaya for breakfast.
His breath caught in his throat and he felt it hands shake with need. A need to touch her. Confirm that she was real and not some figment of an over-wrought imagination. Her thick hair was held pack in a loose ponytail. Her face scrubbed clean. Callum knew that her lips would be moist from her favorite lip balm she put on religiously every night. The same lip balm he would religiously kiss off every night. She had even taken the time to remove her fingernail polish leaving her nails bare and natural.
She wore a Save the Whales t-shirt that he had grown quite familiar with four years ago. It was thin and threadbare and sexy as hell. Gray sweatpants and bare feet. This was his Elli. His chest tightened with need as he stared at her.
"I can't do this now, Callum."
Her voice cracked and his heart broke. He knew he should go away and leave her alone. Nothing could ever come of this. She was a princess and he was just a solider. A broken soldier with the scars inside and outside his body to prove it. Their worlds could not be more different. He knew it the day she left Honduras and he knew it now. He should turn around and walk out of her life. Save them both from opening up old wounds that could never be fully healed. Edward could take the case from here. There were better men he could put on the job. But Callum could not move. His feet were glued to the carpet beneath him. Then she lifted her face and he saw the pain in her eyes.
He could not wait a second more. He erased the distance between them in two strides, but stopped before he touched her. He did not want to push too hard. If she did not want him there he would go. No questions asked.
She shook her head. Her chin quivered as it fought for strength. "Callum. Please. I can't fight you anymore. Not tonight. Please." Her request came out as a whimper.
"Please what?" He asked. His voice deep and raw with emotion.
She looked down at her feet and shook her head.
"Let's call a truce. For tonight." He offered.
He reached out and lightly caressed her arms and began to slowly rub the goosebumps away. He kept her at arm’s length. If she wanted to get closer to him he would be there for her, but it would be her decision. Although it took every ounce of strength he had.
His baser instinct fought to take over and pull her hard against his chest and kiss her pain away. But she did not need to be mauled by a man who wanted to drink her like a desert wants water. She needed a champion. A hero. Someone that was going to comfort her until she let out all she was holding back so tightly. He controlled his own need and gave her the final choice. Let her make that last step. The step that would make the space between them disappear. She earned at least that.
Finally, after what seemed like an eternity to him, Elizabeth looked up and her amber eyes dissolved into his. His heart melted.
"Oh, Callum."
And that was it. The damn burst. She took the final step and he crushed her against his chest and let her cry until her body could produce no more tears. He held her as her body shook with frustration and sorrow. Finally, when the worst of it was over, and he felt her strength give out, he reached down and picked her up cradling her against his body. Her arms went around his neck and her head rested on his shoulder. It felt as natural as if her body was tailor made to be next to his.
Chapter 9
Elizabeth clung to his thick neck like she would cling to a tree in a hurricane. If she let go, she knew she would blow away. She expected him to take her to her bedroom. She had already decided she would not protest. She needed to be close to him, to feel him against her body. The warmth of his skin and the mastery of his hands. She had not been with anyone since Callum. Not even Watson. As princess, casual affairs were not an option. Most men had to sign a release form just to take her out for an evening. But with Callum it was different. Despite her earlier protests, in the end she would trust him with her life.
But she should have known Callum was too much of a gentleman to take her to bed after such an emotional display. He placed her gently on the couch and even pulled up the soft cashmere blanket over her legs. She looked at him and was sure he could read the confusion and disappointment she felt on her face. He gave her one of those killer half-smiles she missed so much and shrugged his shoulders.
"Listen, don't get me wrong. Putting you on that couch was about the hardest thing I have ever done. But I think you need something more than that right now." Callum rubbed the back of his neck with his hand as he looked down at her. She could see the debate that raged within him.
"Always making decisions for me. Always thinking you know what's best. Have you ever considered for a minute that you might not know what is best for me? Maybe getting naked and having hot, monkey sex might be just what I need right now."
It felt good to say exactly what was on her mind. She had been holding in so many thoughts and emotions for so long. Saying something so shocking felt good. She looked up at him expecting to see his mouth gapped open. Instead he just looked at her like she was adorable. Elizabeth should have known that it would be near impossible to say anything that would shock him.
He chuckled, which only made her more frustrated. "I've never actually seen monkeys having sex. Have you?"
He handed her a box of tissues. Elizabeth grabbed one and blew her nose in a very unprincess-like way. But she was past caring. At least for tonight.
"I know what you’re doing. You are not as suave as you think you are," she said as she wiped her nose.
"Honey, I never would claim to be suave. Witty at times if I had enough to drink. Sarcastic, definitely. And handsome as the devil if you like the used merchandise look. But never suave."
She rewarded his banter with a smile. At least she hoped it looked like a smile. She was too tired to know for sure.
"But, just out of curiosity, what is it that I'm doing? You know, just for future reference." Callum stood over her with his hands in his suit pockets. His suit jacket stretched against his broad shoulders and the light blue tie played havoc with her imagination.
"You are trying to take my mind off of my fath . . .my troubles by distracting me and making me laugh. It's what you do. Your preferred way of dealing with those nasty things we mortals call emotions?" She wished she could tell Callum about her father. Maybe he could help in some way. But she could not betray her family's secret.
"Never heard of them."
"Well, for us lowly humans, emotions are pesky little feelings we have to deal with -- like being happy or sad or hurt. Maybe even angry." She raised her eyebrows. "Have you ever felt something like that?" She teased.
"They sound awful." He pretended to shiver like the very idea of having an emotion was a sort of punishment.
But then again, maybe Callum was not pretending. Even when they were together, he avoided emotions like a child avoids brussel sprouts. He put his hands in his pants pockets and looked down on her with clear silver eyes. It was if he was looking right though her. The humor she felt a second ago was replaced by other emotions she had not felt for a long time. Suddenly, she was extremely conscious of her puffy eyes and damp cheeks. She must look awful. Elizabeth grabbed a tissue and begun wiping her eyes and cheeks. At least she took her mascara off already so she did not have to worry about raccoon eyes.
As if he were reading her mind, he leaned down and took the damp tissue away from her and smiled.
"You look just fine. Prettiest monkey I've ever seen." His voice was rough and deep and sent tingles of electricity through her.
"Enough with the monkeys. I'm sorry I ever said anything."
"I'm not. I feel as if I got a sma
ll glimpse into your dirty little mind." He flashed her that wicked smile again and she felt herself melt into the sofa.
"You are officially the most annoying man I have ever come into contract with." Elizabeth tried to hold on to some of her bravado, but she was losing the battle fast.
Callum chuckled softly as he came over to the sofa, lifted her legs as if they weighted no more than a few ounces, and sat down on the opposite end. He let her legs rest lazily against his thighs and began to rub her feet. For a moment, she closed her eyes and wondered how she ever let this man get away. He was handsome. And sweet. And knew just when to hold her and just when to make her laugh. She wished he could be there for her every day. Then she remembered. She did not let him get away. He left her.
Elizabeth's eyes flew open. She had to protect herself. Who knew when he would disappear again. No good-bye. Just nothingness. She could not go through that again. It had cost her too dearly to piece herself together back again like some twisted version of Humpty Dumpty.
She shifted positions and put her feet flat on the floor. At least he had the sense to look guilty. She rubbed her face with her hands, threw off the blanket, and stood-up feeling like a caged animal full of pent-up energy and rage with nowhere to release it.
"You don't have to do that." His voice was calm. Too calm. She wanted to scream.
"Do what?" She crossed her arms and looked down at him daring him to say the wrong thing. All of the untapped energy inside of her begged to be released.
"Fight to put that mask back on. Come sit back down and let me take care of you for a minute." Callum patted the seat next to him. His look was soft. Not confrontational. But, damn it, she wanted confrontation. She did not need him to be nice or sweet. The last thing she needed was to need him and then have him gone again.
"Sure, you will take care of me until you decide I'm all better and then you will go. Disappear. No thank you, Major. I have been down that road before and I have no plans to go there ever again. Ever."
She saw a flash of hurt mixed anger in his eyes. Good. She was glad he felt some of what she did. The unspent energy turned to anger. This was her time to speak. All of the unspoken speeches and unanswered questions came bursting out of her like a breeched levee.
"You lied to me. The whole time we were together. You lied. How could you?"
"Elizabeth . . ." Callum whispered her name.
"Nope. Not your turn to talk."
Elizabeth paced the room in front of him while she bit the edge of her thumbnail. Her brain ran through all of the things she had wanted to say to him after he left her.
"What was I to you? Did you think I was stupid? Just woo me into some little affair and then when I went home you would just go on to your next conquest and hey a paycheck for all of your troubles."
"No, it was not like that at all. Elizabeth, don't do this. You are exhausted and need to rest."
His calm deadpan voice unraveled her nerves even more.
"No wait. I've had years to think about this. And I finally get to ask my questions."
She knew she sounded like a crazed woman. But she did not care. It was good to feel a little crazy.
"You're right." He conceded. "If this will make you feel better then ask away."
Her anger flared as Callum sat back against the cushions and stretched his arm along the back as if he was settling in for the interrogation. She was sure he would have nice, neat little answers prepared, but she had to ask anyway. She spent four years wanting to know how he could lie to her. How he left with not even a 'Good-bye, it’s been fun.'
She sat on the edge of the armrest on the side of the sofa furthest from him and considered what she wanted to ask.
"So, my Jeep. Did it really break down or did you do something to it."
"I did something to it."
She crossed then uncrossed her arms then stood up and paced in front of him. Her head swam in a slurry of emotions. Maybe she did not want to know how he really felt or what really happened in Honduras. Were there any moments that were not lies? Nope. She had to know. This was the closure Stefan wanted to have. The closure she knew she needed.
Elizabeth continued running the highlight reel from Honduras in her mind.
"Then we kept running into each other. At the market. At the beach. You found that piece of blue sea glass. I was so blown away when you showed up that night with it set in a necklace for me. I didn't take that necklace off until… It probably wasn't even the same piece of glass, was it Callum?"
"It was the same one."
The emotion she heard in his voice rattled her for a second. There was sadness in it that made her stomach tighten with regret.
But she refused to let his sentiment interrupt her conspiracy theory. Four years of bitterness had bubbled to the surface and there was no stopping it now.
"Well done by the way. I fell for it all hook, line, and sinker. Was the leave of absence from the tough job, the cabin . . .Was that all part of the master plan?"
"No. I just had to keep an eye on you. Make sure you were safe. The leave, the cabin, the necklace . . .that was all for me." Callum crossed his arms and seemed uncomfortable with what he just admitted.
"Just a little added benefit for your troubles. Might as well grab a little something extra on the side." The walls she had built to protect herself did not allow her to think any of it was really. It could not have been. Because if it was, he never would have left.
She crossed her arms wanting to protect herself from confirming her worst fear. What if he said yes? What if that was all she was, just a little piece of ass on the side. Something to do until the mission was over. But, Elizabeth could not stop the assault now. She had to see this to the end. She forced himself to meet his gaze directly. Although his eyes had turned to hardened steel, but he did not move a muscle as he eyes assessed him.
"Was it all a lie?" Her heart had begged for an answer to this simple question for four years.
"No." His voice was quiet and as hard as his eyes. Emotionless.
She turned her back to him. She did not want him to see the unshed tears in her eyes.
"Just say it, Callum. It was all a lie."
"No."
Her voice rose in frustration and pain. She swung around and pointed her finger toward him.
"Then why did you disappear? Why did you runaway the first chance you got? I find out that my uncle was killed, my father was king, and I'm the second in line to the throne, and where are you? Gone. And I don't see or hear from you for four years. Then I walk into that luncheon yesterday - that stupid, routine luncheon - and there you are. Like nothing happened."
"You think that was easy for me." He stood but did not take a step toward her. "You make it sound like I wanted to leave you. I left because I had to. Those were my orders. I'm a solider, Elizabeth, just a solider. I do what I am told."
"Don't you dare talk to be about duty and missions," she screamed.
Scared she would fall apart again she turned her back to him and walked across the room to the window. She could see the city lights below. Everyone down there having normal lives. Falling in love. Having children. Sharing the ups and downs of life with family and friends. That was where the true fairy tales were. Callum shifted positions drawing her attention back to the man that wavered somewhere between prince and villain in her heart.
Elizabeth watched Callum though the reflection against the polished window pane. He had sat back down and raked a hand though his hair as he took a deep breath. His strong hand reached up and yanked his tie loose from around his neck as if it was strangling him. As he unbuttoned the top buttons of his dress shirt, she felt an uncontrollable urge to taste his skin right behind his ear where she knew she would feel his pulse quicken against her lips. What was wrong with her? How could she still want him after all he had done?
Lost in her own thoughts, Elizabeth was surprised when he suddenly looked up at her with eyes of molten steel. She almost collapsed with the need she saw ther
e. The same need she felt for him. She turned. Without a word, Callum stood up and strode toward her. He did not stop, did not hesitate, until her lips were pressed against his. His hand snaked back behind her neck and she felt the pressure of his fingertips against her scalp.
"I didn't want to leave you, Elli. Believe me." His gruff words came out as he shifted his position and she opened her mouth for him. Oh, how she wanted to believe him. Needed to believe him. But all she could focus on was the heat of his kiss as their tongues and lips and teeth danced together following a choreography they both knew by heart.
Her arms wrapped themselves around his neck and her body pressed against his. He lifted her off her feet and pressed her body against the window. She perched against the sill and wrapped one leg around his thick thigh making sure he understood that she wanted him as close as he could get. She felt the cool of the window pane against her back as he deftly removed her t-shirt. As if just realizing where they were, he lifted her off the sill."
"We wouldn't want someone seeing something they shouldn't." His voice gruff with need.
"I don't care." She whispered.
"You will later."
"But not now."
Elizabeth wrapped her legs around his waist and threaded her fingers though his hair pulling his attention back to her and the mind-numbing kiss. She did not notice as he carried her into the bedroom and gently laid her down on the bed in a steady, controlled motion until the soft duvet caressed her back. Callum left her there as he stood up, never taking his eyes off of her, and yanked his tie further down until it became unknotted. The swish of the tie being released from the bonds of his collar was one of the most erotic sounds she had ever heard.
After undoing a few buttons and unclasping the cuff links on his shirt, he pulled the dress shirt and his undershirt off over his head in one fluid motion. His chest was well sculpted, broad shoulders, flat and defined abs. Even more sculpted than she remembered. Her hands itched to touch him. She licked her lips in anticipation and was rewarded by a low growl from deep in his throat.
Princess Bodyguard Page 10
