“What do you want Brock? I’m not in any danger at the moment, or am I? If Brock didn’t know before. Now he did. Rick was angry.
“We need to talk.” Ominous, thought Rick.
“About what?” Brock started walking, and Rick followed him. Their AIs stayed back.
“Where are you taking me? Has the Dick put a hit out on me or something? That was quick, never even made it to the Moon.” Rick laughed nervously. Had he?
“The Agency has been spying on you.” Brock had led Rick indoors into a loud bar.
“What are we doing here? Don’t get me wrong I’d love a drink. But this is not you. What’s going on in that big head of yours.” Rick was heading to the bar. When in Rome...
“I needed to get away from the ship and crew. They’re all potential spies for DP. Indoors and loud is safer from prying eyes and ears.”
“I don’t have any money. Amy pays for shit. Can you get this? Cheers.”
“Rick this is serious.” Brock paid for the drinks.
“What that the Agency is spying on me? Yeah, I figured that one out but thanks.”
“OK, Mr Know-it-all. The Agency was using me to spy on you…”
“Duh!” Rick had felt the need to interject at this point to let Brock know that he knew what he was up to.
“Rick it’s not like that so shut your face and listen.” Brock made the accompanying "zip-it" hand gesture. “After the meeting at the Agency, I got suspicious. Some of the stuff Dick said... So after I dropped you off, I went to see an old buddy of mine. From pre-Rick days.” Rick was still listening. “I asked him to give me the once-over, and something immediately popped up on the screen. Don’t freak out.” Rick perked up. Why would I freak out? “There was a flea-sized bot just sitting on my brain capturing data from my senses and relaying it to something bigger.” Rick recoiled in disgust. He’d watched a documentary on brain hacking with insects microbots. Remote hacking was nigh on impossible these days. Had to get inside somehow. “You’re not the one got hacked. So chill. My friend removed the fucker. He told me it’d been there for less than two days. You know what that means? The fucking shrink told on you.” Rick was surprised for an instant. He thought doctor-patient privilege still meant something. Then Rick realised they probably hacked the doc and everyone else. Gary, the camera bots, fucking Barry. If they got Brock, they got everyone. “Look you don’t need to worry about me. I’ve installed a defence mechanism. Anything tries to get in my face holes, it fries.” Rick wanted that. He wondered if his brain was hackable. “They are willing to go to great lengths to keep tabs on you. I think you might be more important than you think.” This is precisely what Rick wanted to hear. Which made him very suspicious. He couldn’t really verify Brock’s story.
“OK, Brock. Let’s say you’re telling the truth. Does this mean you’re on my side? Even if it means death...”
“Yeah I’m with you, but I feel I should tell you; I have a copy tucked away in a secret location. The moment I die the other Brock activates with all my memories.”
“Well aren’t you the lucky cunt.” Rick glowered.
“Hey if we’re going off script I don’t see why we can’t hook you up along the way.” Brock raised his glass and Rick met it.
“I’ll drink to that!” They finished their drinks and headed back to the ship making a big show of having had a bunch of shots in celebration. Gary sent the camera bots to film them. Rick rushed towards the closest one and grabbed his camera head.
“See you all in two months for new adventures! In space! That’s right the Last Human is going into space! Solus Tour coming soon!”
There would be hype. Rick knew it, there was no going back now.
Mom and Pops
Rick had been on holiday since the season finale. He spent a lot of his downtime travelling Earth. He’d revisited Atlantis several times. During the summer aquacyborgs and dolphins of the world had created a united movement campaigning for their inclusion into the Council. The momentum afforded by Rick’s intervention on The Last Human was not wasted. Support for their initiative was growing among Zero citizens. It seemed people were keen on getting dolphins involved in government. Bubbles would become Councillor, and he would win by a landslide. Councillor Bubbles, it made Rick chuckle every time he thought about it. The summer demonstrated Rick’s influence over the masses. A power even he underestimated.
Rick had behaved during the break. Most importantly no drunken escape rants. He’d been doing a great job of promoting Solus Tour. The fans were excited. But it was bittersweet for Rick. He was glad to be leaving and excited about his new life, but he was a bit sad at leaving Earth behind. He’d be gone soon, maybe forever. Very few who left ever came back. Rick wondered, was it the distances, were the colonies better? He’d find out soon enough. In the meantime, he’d travelled the world mostly making the most of his suit in water cities. The fun was over though; Solus Tour was set to begin soon.
Brock had suggested Rick get additional upgrades for his precious suit and had taken him to one of his trusted friends. The guy was huge just like Brock but much older. He had a long greying beard and stained overalls, he was rocking a black bandana with skulls and bones. Rick liked the style. Cyborg-bodybuilding-wizard-mechanic. Strong look. It turned out this guy had been handling Brock’s upgrades since day one. Pops, it’s what everyone called him, had found young feral Brock and fixed him, raised him and trained him.
Pops’ workshop was nestled between Robot Town and the great towers of 6-6, a place called Boxtown. This area had been added when independent cyber surgeons made the case that the towers were not an adequate place of business for their trade. They required dark alleys and catered to shifty individuals, something in between the Pit and Robot Town. They won their case, and Boxtown was built. Units stack on top of each other and next to each other to create a confusing maze. Looked a lot like a cargo yard. Boxtown was renowned for its cheap cyber-enhancement workshops and temp mutation labs. This was where party animals and people who wanted to stay off grid came for their upgrades. Pops’ workshop was somewhere in the middle of this maze. Rick would never find his way out if Brock left him there.
To Rick, the workshop looked like an indoor junkyard, but apparently, all these components were useful and some rare, supposedly.
“So this is the famous Rick. He’s smaller than he looks on TV.” Good start thought Rick.
“Yeah, they always film it, so I look taller. TV magic eh!” Nothing, OK. “Thanks for taking a look at my suit. Brock says you’re the best.” Rick tried a smile.
“And you believe him? Brock is a fool! Wasting his life on the likes of you!” Ah, so there it is. Rick didn’t really know where to go from there.
“That’s enough Pops! We all make our own decisions, he's made his, and I've made mine. Now can you just improve this suit? I know you’ll know what to do.” Brock dropped the suit on a workbench and turned to Rick. “Let’s go. He’ll do a great job; you’ll be better than Iron Man!” Pops shook his head and muttered under his breath while they walked away laughing. “So Rick, do you think you’ll be able to survive without the suit?” Brock laughed. Rick didn’t think it was so funny. He’d grown accustomed to the suit. Without it, he felt weak and insignificant again. When he’d gotten back from Atlantis, he’d refused to take it off for a week straight, sleeping in it even. It destroyed his mattress. They’d eventually pried him out to clean the suit and wash him.
“I’ll get by. Probably just hide out at home. I know Mom will be pleased I don’t have the suit on.” They both chuckled.
Rick had destroyed a few parts of the house because of miscalculated strength. But he didn’t care. The suit had an empowering effect, though he’d also damaged a few cabs, his Uber rating was down to three. Brock ordered them now. They got back to Rick’s and headed to the kitchen for a bite. Rick had been eating and drinking at home more lately. His celebrity had reached extreme levels after Atlantis. It’d become difficult for him to be in publi
c.
Rick had Gousto prepare a couple of fancy burgers and they munched away in silence, until Mom spoke. “Rick where’s your power suit? I didn’t see you walk in with it?” Mom clearly enjoyed saying that.
“It’s getting upgrades. Don’t worry I’ll have it back in no time.” Mom didn’t reply. Rick took another bite out of his burger and turned to Brock who’d already demolished his burger. There was nothing left. It almost seemed like the plate had been licked clean.
“So Rick... What’s the plan? We haven’t really discussed the actual escape part of Solus Tour.” Rick didn’t really have a concrete plan. That’s why he hadn’t discussed it with anyone, and that’s why he wasn’t arousing suspicions. Rick was going to wing it, something cyborgs, robots and logical beings hated. Brock wouldn’t like it.
“I think it’s probably best we just do each section one at a time. Thinking too far ahead leads to disappointment when things don’t work out.” He grinned. Brock hated it when he was mysterious and philosophical.
“What escape?” Mom had joined in. Although she was aware of Solus Tour, she’d always assumed Rick would return. She was an AI, but AIs had feelings too. “When are you coming back from this Solus Tour?” Rick and Brock were still shooting blanks.
“Ummm...” That’s all Rick could muster. Brock did no better.
“Mom let me sync with you.” Once Amy synced with the house it would know everything Amy knew. She would probably be angry. The sync took a few moments, Amy hovered in front of one of the house ports and data was shared. Rick knew it was over when Mom started shouting. She was upset.
“I’m coming with you. I’m not staying in this empty house. My purpose is to keep Rick safe and healthy when indoors I will keep doing that. I can be the ship’s AI.”
“We’re not taking a ship. The production is making us travel on public systems. They don’t trust Rick.”
“Rightly so!” Mom’s synthetic voice betrayed sadness. It was unmistakable. “He’s a sneaky liar.”
“I was just trying to postpone this conversation because I didn’t know what to say and I don’t know what to do. I just have a final destination. But I’m not sure how I’m getting there.”
“What’s the destination?” Brock asked.
“Can’t say.” Rick was not telling.
“Can’t say, or won’t say?”
“Whichever you prefer.” Rick wasn’t telling, and that was that. But the subject was quickly brought back to Mom.
“So you were just going to leave me here and say nothing.”
“I was going to call and stay in touch.” He wasn’t. In reality, Rick expected to be dead before episode three started shooting. But he couldn’t tell them that. Mom and Amy would lose their minds.
“We could attach her to your suit’s programming.” Brock burst out laughing. Amy’s suggestion would work, apparently, but to have Massively Overbearing Machine in his head whenever he wore the suit would be intense for Rick, perhaps too intense.
“Yes! I love it, it’s the best way to keep you safe!” Fuck. Rick couldn’t believe this was actually going to happen.
“Calm down. Amy is there any other way? With you maybe?”
“No sorry Rick. Only one AI per cube and they don’t sell blank cubes.” Rick let out a long sigh. The giving up sigh.
“OK. Let’s be clear. This is only a temp solution Mom. You’re not living in my suit permanently. It will drive me crazy.” Rick might have to wear the suit less, never going to happen, or find a ship or body for Mom.
“Yes I understand, only until you find me a ship or body.”
“OK then.” Rick started thinking about all those great times swimming in the ocean, enjoying his suit-given abilities, deep in thought, merging with the ocean. Then he added Mom’s running commentary. Fuck.
Iron Rick
A few hours had passed, Rick had gotten away from Mom for one of the last times, and it was time for the Solus Tour team to attend their medical examinations. Going into space was not a mundane activity, especially not for a human.
Things were straightforward enough for cyborgs. They were handed a list of recommended augmentations to improve their comfort and survival chances when experiencing the rigours of space. These included a retractable inbuilt helmet and expanding nanomachine spacewalk units, as well as the all-important pressure adaptors and radioactive scrubbers. The robots were merely checked over to ensure they had no malfunctions brewing. They were already space-proof.
For Rick things were more complicated. As the good doctor was explaining; Rick was a human and no human had been into space for decades.
Most doctors in the world were great at upgrading and fixing bodies but preserving a frail body seemed pointless. But like Rick, they would need to fight the urge to upgrade.
“You see Mr Archer space and foreign worlds can be very traitorous, and if I understand, correctly you will be visiting every colony in Solus. That is…” The doc paused, probably for effect, “a wide variety of environments, some quite stressful for the body and mind.” Not a very good drop. Rick was getting schooled on the dangers of space for a human. The cameras were rolling. Episode 1: Rick is too shit for space what are we going to do about it? The doc continued, “you see the moment you leave the safety of Terra everything becomes a hazard. Firstly, you can’t survive the vacuum of space. Even your cyborg colleagues will need upgrades. Secondly, radiation permeates the Universe, and outside of shielded zones, it will destroy your cells. Stay in the ship and when the ship lands stay indoors or in the safe zones.”
“Stay indoors. Check.” The doc frowned.
“This is no laughing matter, Mr Archer. This trip will be the death of you if you do not take the appropriate safety precautions.” Rick stopped smiling. He was tempted to say he was OK with dying but stopped himself. “The varying gravities and weightlessness will cause motion sickness, nausea and just general malaise, I’ve cleared a subcutaneous implant that delivers a drug for that. Another problem you’ll encounter will be bone and muscle deterioration. Though the ships and planets will have artificial gravity that usually closely matches Terra this won’t be at all times. Mr Archer our records show that you will most likely become the first human to spend such extended periods in space. And, well, we’re simply not sure about the long-term effects on humans. There have been no studies. But we are practically certain the loss of bone and muscle mass will occur. So you will need to undergo muscle stimulation therapy daily.”
“And what might that be?” It sounded unpleasant.
“We’ve created a chamber that will stimulate muscle and bone growth while you sleep.”
“What so no bed?”
“Only when in transit Mr Archer. This will be better for your health. The chamber will also help stop fluid redistribution and minimise the psychological effects of space travel like poor sleep, high stress, enclosed spaces and homesickness.” Rick didn’t like the idea of being locked in some coffin while they travelled. He wanted to be awake when he died. “We think your extended travels will be easier and mostly painless if you travel inside the pod. Should the ship you are aboard be destroyed the pod is protected by additional shielding and possesses an engine and pilot AI to take you the nearest Council presence.”
“What about the show? I’m supposed to be shooting a show about how easy it is to travel the stars in this wonderfully connected civilisation. How do I do it from the box?”
“I have been told you would do the scenes and adjourn to your pod.”
“Fuck that!” Rick was having none of it.
“Mr Archer your safety is our main concern.”
“Yes, I’ve heard that shit before.” Rick turned to Amy all smug-like, “won’t you send the good doctor the schematics to my suit.” Still wearing his smug smile Rick turned back. “Doc I want you to tell me what modifications this suit needs to survive the perils of space,” Rick said the last bit like he was narrating an old B-movie. The doc didn’t say anything. The blank star
e notified Rick that the doc was examining the suit.
“This is an impressive piece of technology. Who made this for you?”
“It’s a gift from the Atlanteans.”
“They have done excellent work. We hadn’t even thought of a power suit. There's been no research in this field since the war as cyborgs have no need for them. But this suit can easily be modified to survive space. We will send the recommendations to your AI.” Rick was pumped. One epic space suit coming right up. He was practically sure the Dick would be furious. Bonus points. Having Rick locked up in a coffin was probably his idea. Not this time. “Mr Archer. There is something else I wanted to discuss with you.” The doc’s voice had become more sombre. The kind of tone that precedes terrible news.
“What it is it?” Rick hesitantly asked the question.
“Your brain is deteriorating. Most likely a pre-existing condition exacerbated by the excesses of your lifestyle. This is easy to address but not without breaching your contract. The other alternative is healthier life choices. If you do not address this issue, your brain may become too damaged to be accurately scanned and cyberised.” Rick was in shock. His brain was fucked. Fuck. He needed that digital brain encryption key or cyber enhancements or both. Fuck.
“What can you do doc?” Rick wasn’t hopeful, but it was worth a try. The doc thought or flicked through his files. His eyes blinked a lot, and he was quiet for a minute.
The Last Human Page 12
