Torch

by Tricia Copeland

  “My sister got sick too. It was really scary.”

  “So, she survived?”

  I needed to tell the truth. I could sense she would know if I were lying, so I came up with a truth. “She was one of the first to get the cure.”

  Taking a deep breath through her nose, she stuck out her arm. “I’m Sadie.”

  “Thank you. You got my name earlier.”

  She chuckled and let her hand drop to her side. “Right.”

  “Is that why you came here, because of your daughter? Is your husband here too?”

  “We didn’t deal with losing her well. Daniel was … is too much of a soldier. Butler is his commander. He helps us where he can, but he wouldn’t come.”

  My mind pinged. That was what we needed. People on the inside we could trust. “Does he believe that Butler is wrong?”

  “I think so, but he would never say.” She blinked, and her eyes cut away and back to me. “I keep thinking of a mom halfway across the world whose daughter would end up like my Lark just because a stupid guy wouldn’t share the vaccine and cure.”

  “That’s exactly why we’re here.” I stepped closer. “Do you think there are others with husbands, wives, maybe sisters or brothers who stayed in the States but may be sympathetic and would help us?”

  “I’m sure there would be some. Daniel and others help us get supplies.”

  Alerting Amelie to follow us, we made our way to the command room. Turner sat right where I knew he would be, in the middle of everyone. He had a natural magnetism, his intellect and leadership capabilities never failed. People followed him. The beard still didn’t fit his face, and I noted his hollow cheeks. Even though I longed to keep moving, a week with adequate food would do us good.

  I waved him over and explained the idea. He waited while I talked, but I could see his eye twitch. Looking to Sadie, he motioned for Amelie and me to follow him. At the edge of the room, he leaned against the wall. “What are you doing? You know we need to be careful. You can’t talk to people like this.”

  “I didn’t tell her anything. It’s a good idea. We need people on the inside.”

  “I know we do, but we’re going to have to find people that are here, that can go back in. Otherwise we can’t be completely sure we could trust them. We have to be one-hundred-percent certain.”

  “Fine, well, we’ll start analyzing resources, see how many people we can recruit. Maybe Sadie will help us.” I spun to walk away.

  He snagged my arm. “Don’t get too close. We have to be vigilant.”

  “I know.” I held his stare for a second.

  Dropping my arm, he brushed past me. I rolled my eyes for effect and strode to the door, Amelie on my heels. Sadie joined us, and although she said there was a list, I wanted to see everything for myself. She found a clipboard, paper, and pen, and we started cataloging in the kitchen.

  “The leader guy seems like a pill.” Sadie opened the fridge unit.

  Happy that our act worked, I shrugged. “Turner? He’s smart, and I trust him.”

  “Guess that’s all you need, right?”

  What was this woman’s problem? Did she have to talk to me? Looking at the shelves of canned goods, I realized how good we had it at Lovelock. Fresh fruits and vegetables were a luxury. She indicated they’d been there a month, and I asked about a basement or other room for hydroponics. They didn’t have a bio person, and I wondered how hard it could be. At least they had large amounts of canned goods, so we’d be able to use their MRE supplies for the trip.

  Amelie spoke to Sadie for the first time. “So, what is the point? What are you doing out here?”

  Sadie’s eyes cut to the floor and back to Amelie. “Honestly we’re starting to lose morale. Most of us came in protest, but there’s only so long that lasts. Butler doesn’t care about a hundred people. If you guys hadn’t come along, I feel like people would start to leave, go back, beg to be pardoned.”

  Next, we assessed the vehicles. We’d need fast, small transports that could carry people and supplies. I identified six candidates and figured we might be able to squeeze six soldiers in each. The hope had been at least fifty bodies. Any help is better than none.

  Sadie helped us find the personnel files, but we decided that going through all of them would be a waste of time at that point. We needed people who wanted to help. Once we had volunteers, then we could screen them. It surprised me that Sadie seemed so willing to aid us. Would I have been so trusting and eager?

  My stomach growled, and Sadie suggested we break for food. Catching my full reflection in a window, I realized why we might look trustworthy, dedicated. My cheek, shoulder, and clavicle bones protruded from my skin, veins and muscles just under the surface. How much weight had we lost? I glanced at Amelie, studying her hollow eye sockets realizing the toll our trip took on our bodies. Turner was right, we needed to recover. A week here and we’d be back to our full potential.

  Sitting down with a tray of food, I started grilling Sadie. Why had they decided to trust us? Who was in charge? What did she think of them? Had they had problems? Who were the troublemakers? As we cleared our plates, others trickled in for the breakfast meal. Sadie started introducing us, and I made an excuse to escape. The less exposure the better. I’d probably spent too much time with Sadie as it was. I made a mental note to have Amelie interact with her in the future.

  Signaling to Amelie, I wound to the barrack, grabbing my toiletries to brush my teeth. Staring at my face, I realized I needed more cover. I dug through my bag and found a black wool cap. Who would want to talk to a hooded black-striped face person? I checked my refection in the mirror again and discovered I wouldn’t even want to look at me for long, small mission accomplished. I hated my short hair and couldn’t wait to be out of the spotlight. My neck felt exposed, and I missed the swish of my ponytail on my back. Still, the alter ego would keep me alive.

  Walking to my bunk, I saw Sadie at the end of the bed. “What are you doing here?”

  “I’m your person. Are you cold?”

  I patted my cap. “Yeah, I got a chill. What do you mean my person? Like, you’re our guard?”

  “Something like that. Wouldn’t want you to get lost.”

  I ignored her and motioned for Amelie to follow me, thinking perhaps we shouldn’t have split from Mace and Turner. We intercepted them in the hall. Relieved to see Turner’s face, I relaxed. Everything was okay. Nobody had imprisoned them.

  “Done teching?” I asked.

  Turner stopped in front of me. “They told us we stink. Plus, I figured we should get some sleep. There’s a camp meeting at 1800, and we meet with command at sixteen hundred to discuss plans for moving east. Did you get a list of resources?”

  Walking back to the barrack, we relayed the information about the vehicles and meals. I found it hard to be near him without touching him, but personal relationships could be exploited, and we didn’t want to be more vulnerable. Mace and Turner headed to the showers, and Amelie and I stretched out on our bunks. I signed to her that she could sleep first, and pretending to check my radio, I set a timer.

  “Thinking to contact someone?” Sadie asked from her spot on the floor beside my bed.

  “Just habit.”

  Laying my head on the pillow, I turned to look at Sadie. “We’re not a threat to you.”

  “I almost think I believe you.”

  “I hope you do, and I hope you aren’t a threat to us.”

  I closed my eyes, trying to look relaxed. With the foreign environment, I found it hard. We were used to being outside. I hadn’t been in a traditional, closed building in six months. The whir of the fans, the hum of electricity, and voices had me on edge. I listened for Mace and Turner to return and heard their bed springs creak. They too would sleep in shifts, so at least two of us were always awake. I wondered when we would know we could trust these people, if I could ever rely on anyone outside Turner and my dad.

  As the room quieted, it became hard to stay awake, and I repl
ayed a story Dad had read for me as a child in my head. Little House on the Prairie was my favorite bedtime book for years, and I knew the plots, every one of them, backwards and forwards. I likened Amelie, Mace, Turner, and I to the Ingalls family, crossing the country in search of greener pastures or, in our case, people to help oust an evil regime. Don’t be dramatic.

  My timer dinged.

  “I didn’t think you were asleep.”

  I jumped at the sound of Sadie’s voice.

  “Nothing gets past you, does it?” Standing, I nudged Amelie, and stretched. “How stupid do you think we are?”

  “Oh, I think you’re very smart. You’re a survivor for sure.”

  Amelie gave me a thumbs-up. Lying down, sleep came quicker than I estimated, and it seemed like seconds between my head hitting the pillow and Amelie’s alarm. Getting my bearings, I stood. Across the room, Turner swung his feet to the floor. He’d clipped his beard and wore the same black wool cap as me. When he glanced at me, I smiled.

  “What’s on the agenda now?” Sadie stood before me, hands on hips.

  I rolled my eyes. “You’re going to have to sleep sometime.”

  “You may not like my replacement.”

  In a conference room, Turner introduced us to their leadership, pointing out our respective skill sets. Amelie took electrical lead, which I found amazing given that pre-apocalypse she cared nothing for anything technology related. Mace worked with mechanics and machinery, Turner did tech as they’d already witnessed, and I provided bio, nutritional, and medical support. Their lead team consisted of ten: eight men and two women, including Sadie. She had a degree in psychology and worked in human resources for the army, so she took care of people problems in the group.

  Major Hunt served as commander, and we learned they’d all deserted from an army base in Wyoming. Half of them brought families along, so with children, their total people count came to one hundred thirty. In thinking of manpower, we ruled out soldiers with families, although Hunt indicated he wouldn’t bar them from volunteering. Still, that brought the available soldier pool down to about fifty. Fifty would have been a great number, if they had fast vehicles to carry that many. Their buses were too slow.

  “How do you think this will go?” Turner asked Hunt as we ended the discussion.

  “Our people are antsy. We count on supplies from those aiding us in the UNS. Something has to give. I don’t know if this is the hope they need or the thing that’s going to send them back to the States willing to face charges of treason.”

  I asked how committed their suppliers were and if we could use them as inside people. Major Hunt indicated it might be a possibility. I figured if they were helping them get food without squealing, they could be trusted. Thinking I had seven days here, I asked to look at the layout of the compound and offered to help them figure out a garden. If we could do it in a cave, then almost anything was possible. Plus, with some people moving out, perhaps those spaces could be used for growing areas.

  Sadie offered to show me the plans, and someone brought us meals as we poured over possibilities. I couldn’t contemplate not having self-sustaining practices and wondered what their end game would be. The thought forced me to think about our future. Even if we got Butler to share the vaccine and cure technology, Turner and I were still wanted. How would we retrieve Nave and Mom? If we ousted his government, I predicted we’d be pardoned, but that would throw the country further into turmoil. No. I had to trust that Admiral Masterson had a plan for leadership transition.

  The intercom signal made me jump, and Sadie chuckled. “It’s just an announcement. Time for the general meeting. So skittish.”

  Ignoring her, I joined Amelie, Mace, and Turner at the front of the room. Seeing the residents take seats on the benches reminded me of Lovelock when I learned about Zhou, his rise to power, and my relationship to him. My brain struggled to make sense of how six months ago I’d been worried about classes and boys. The dictator of half the world’s population was my grandfather. It didn’t get much more intense than your family sitting on opposite sides of a nuclear standoff.

  By the end of the meeting, we had forty candidates for the thirty-two seats on the caravan. We decided to screen these potentials and determine the final list by morning. Training would begin after that. The biggest obstacle came when I announced we would need four hundred thirty-two meals for the trip. It would devastate their supplies, leaving the rest of the community vulnerable. In the end, they voted to give us two hundred sixteen meals, a two-day supply for the thirty-six of us traveling to Colorado, half of what I wanted, but it would have to suffice.

  The group disbanded, and we walked towards the exit for a cardio break.

  “You okay?” Turner caught up with me as we passed through the doors.

  “I’m sick of peopling.” I stopped to stretch.

  “Peopling?”

  “People. All these people. I feel responsible for them.”

  “You’re not. We’re not. They chose this. Think of us as the gophers or carrier pigeons.”

  “All I can think about is being stuck here for seven more days.” I started to jog.

  Turner kept pace with me. “Actually, it needs to be eight. We need to see how often they’re switching their programs. We only have so much tech we can get on the vehicles, and we don’t know what they’ll have in Colorado. We’re lucky it’s here.”

  We ran an hour, almost killing poor Sadie and her partner, Ben, which I learned was the name of the guy trailing Mace and Turner. Then, we showered and began the interviews and viral screenings, health tests, and psychology questionnaires. In the end, the decisions came down to skills. As dawn approached, we ventured outside for another workout and run, this time including our new recruits. They appeared to be in good shape, but we doubted running for twelve hours a day conditioned.

  I found Sadie as we started to break into groups for the three-mile jog. “I’m surprised you volunteered.”

  “I don’t have kids. I’m healthy.” She shrugged.

  “What about your husband? Will he approve?”

  “You still want informants? Someone on the inside?”

  “Of course. But I’m not sure I can even trust you, much less your husband.”

  “He’s one of the people helping us get supplies. This was just supposed to be until things calmed down, but now that it’s been weeks, he’s getting antsy. He wants me back and knows once I’ve dug in my heels there’s no changing my mind.”

  “You’re one of my newest favorite people.”

  She cut her eyes sideways. “You meet anyone else on your trek across no-man’s land?”

  “No.” I half-laughed, thinking maybe I would start calling her Aunt Sadie.

  I kept busy hauling dirt and preparing garden beds inside their compound between workouts and sleep. They’d been able to get seeds in the last shipment, and we would plant by the end of the week. Each night we scanned the radio and satellite channels for news from the capitol, Port Orford, and EC. Commander Butler vowed not to give in to the demands of the EC but hadn’t acted against Port Orford. The EC reiterated its ninety-day deadline ticking away like a time-bomb. In seventy days, we’d be wading through rubble or worse if we didn’t do something.

  I kept my head down and focused on my work. Even with the grueling hours of labor, I couldn’t stop the slide show each night as images of Nave, Mom, Dad, Night, William, Bridge, and all our other friends danced through my brain. The only thing that’d kept them at bay before slept twelve feet away from me. Odd how I could pick out Turner’s breathing from all the others, how I heard every sigh and each movement of his body as we lay across the room from each other.

  The next two days, we prepped the vehicles, checking mechanics, filling water tanks, and sorting supplies. Major Hunt gave us extra weapons, and we cleaned these and sorted ammunition. On day eight, Turner announced he’d collected all the data on satellite movement we needed. We double checked each vehicle, reviewed procedures with
the team, and decided on a final route.

  Even though I’d been awake since four a.m., sleep eluded me. I tossed and turned, dreading to return to the Colorado cave site where I’d been held hostage by Dena and Owen. I prayed our intel on the group hiding out there proved correct. We needed more than thirty-six soldiers for a coup.

  My alarm sounded at 1600. After grabbing a meal kit from the cafeteria, I weaved through the halls to the truck bay. I found Mace and Turner checking the vehicles, sweeping them for trackers once again. We drove the vehicles out of the garage one by one, inspected them, and then scanned every person and their bags as they loaded into the trucks. Tuner and I were the last to board the transports. I hated that we couldn’t travel together, but it was safer for us to be apart. Mace took point in the first vehicle, Sadie in second, me in third, and Turner in fourth, followed by Amelie and Ben in the fifth and sixth vehicles. As darkness fell, we drove out into the night. Our southerly route would take twelve hours with travel time plus stops if all went as planned. Not so bad. I could wait twelve more hours to gain more bodies for our cause. Still, the black nothingness, the drone of the engines, the isolation of sitting with strangers wore on me.

  “You could at least tell a joke every once in a while,” Carl, my front seat companion, commented as we switched drivers two hours into the journey.

  I smiled, thinking how Nave used to like puns. “Ever thought about how funny mountains are?”

  “What?” Carl cut his eyes my direction.

  “They’re hill-arious.”

  “Good one. Why don’t aliens visit our planet?”

  I rolled my eyes. “I don’t know.”

  “Terrible ratings. One star.”

  “One star?”

  “Oh, you’re too young. When I was a kid we rated things using a star system, five stars good, one, not so good.”

  “You mean when we had choices between products?”

  Carl proceeded to tell me about his life pre-epidemic, and I realized just how little I knew about those traveling with us. Turner had kept his focus on the tech, and I concentrated on supplies to limit our exposure. After the initial interviews, we trusted Amelie and Mace to handle the people, and I prayed it wasn’t a mistake. We could trust Amelie and Mace, right? They are on our side, right?