by Erika Wilde
He quickly grabbed a condom from the nightstand before positioning himself on his back on the bed and sheathing his raging erection. “Come here,” he murmured. “I want you on top of me, straddling my cock so I can watch you when you come.”
She moved over him, her knees on either side of his hips, and with the tip of his shaft nudging her core, she slowly, gradually lowered herself, until he’d impaled her completely. She shuddered, her fingers dug into his stomach, and her head dropped back as a blissful moan escaped her lips. Before he could even order her to do so, she was instinctively gyrating on top of him, against him, creating all the friction and pressure she needed against her clit to reach her own orgasm.
He watched her ride him, seating herself fully on his lap, again and again. She looked so incredibly beautiful, so seductive, and it took all his focus to keep from finishing before she did.
“Touch yourself, Rae,” he urged her huskily. “Pinch your nipples until they sting and hurt.”
Without hesitating, she lifted her palms to her breasts, squeezing them in her hands as her head tipped forward so she was looking down at him and he could see the building need and desire reflected on her face. She pulled on her nipples, tweaking them between her fingers until she moaned and her pussy pulsed around his cock.
Knowing she was close to orgasm, he took hold of her hips, grinding against her and bringing their bodies as close as two people could get. She whimpered, the sound escalating into a soft cry of ecstasy as she started to come and he was only seconds behind. With a deep, possessive growl, he let go of the mounting pressure of his own release as they spiraled over the edge together, her inner muscles milking every inch of pleasure from his cock.
And when she collapsed on top of him and he wrapped his arms around her, he realized he never wanted to let her go. He’d lost her once, and his heart wasn’t prepared to do it a second time. But with Raevynn’s high-profile life awaiting her, staying with him was her choice to make, not his.
A short time later, they were sitting on the couch in the living room, with Raevynn eating her pint of Ben and Jerry’s Chocolate Fudge Brownie ice cream. Since Collin already had the treat earlier with Harper and Lucas, he watched Raevynn relish and savor each bite of the chocolate-infused dessert, her eyes sparkling blissfully.
While he reclined against the corner of the couch wearing just his sweatpants, she sat one cushion over, her legs crossed in front of her. She’d put on her camisole and shorts, and he tried not to let the hard peaks of her nipples pressing against the silky material distract him. The least he could do was let Raevynn finish a rare treat she hadn’t had in forever before he ravished her again.
So, instead, he summoned up the determination to finally address the one thing they hadn’t talked about the past few days.
“Rae, there’s something personal I’d like to ask you.”
She lifted her gaze to his as her spoon dipped back into her ice cream, an easygoing smile on her lips. “Sure. Anything.”
He could tell that she meant it. She was opening herself up and giving him the opportunity to fill in the gaps of the past seven years. But now that he’d brought it up, did he really want to go there? Did he really want to hear about Zane and Raevynn together, as a couple for three years? Not really, but he needed to know so he no longer had to speculate about the depth of their relationship. And if she was truly over him.
“Tell me about you and Zane Bishop.”
Her eyes widened for a second, like a deer caught in headlights, before she glanced away and paid more attention to her pint of Chocolate Fudge Brownie.
He frowned, finding her reaction strange. “You don’t want to talk about it?”
She sighed and set her carton of ice cream on the coffee table in front of them before meeting his gaze again. “It’s not that I don’t want to talk about it. It’s that I shouldn’t talk about it.”
He scratched at his temple at her confusing explanation. “Okay . . . why not?”
“Because I signed an NDA as far as my relationship with Zane Bishop is concerned.”
He blinked at her in surprise, finding it extreme that she couldn’t discuss certain aspects of her personal life because she’d been expected to sign a confidentiality agreement. “Is that normal between celebrities?”
“Some, I suppose,” she said with a shrug. “But there were extenuating circumstances surrounding my situation with Zane. I want to tell you everything. I certainly owe you the truth . . . and I trust that what I’m about to tell you isn’t going to leave this house?”
“Of course.” He’d never betray her confidence.
She rested her hands in her lap, her expression subdued. “It was all a publicity stunt, created by my mother and Zane’s publicist.”
He stared at her for a few extra seconds as he digested that information, not sure he understood what she was saying. “So, the relationship wasn’t real?”
“No.” She shook her head. “It was fake. And all for show.”
“For three years?” he asked incredulously, even more bewildered by the situation.
She nodded, her fingers playing with the hem of her camisole. “It happened when I started headlining my own shows. Zane and I were both up-and-coming singers in the music industry, and my mother and his publicist saw an opportunity to promote both of our careers by linking us together. But we weren’t together in that sort of way.”
“You never kissed him?”
A small, slightly amused smile appeared on her lips. “Only in public, and mostly at award shows throughout the year when there were cameras around to capture the moment. It was usually a chaste kiss on the cheek or lips and hand-holding. That was the extent of our physical affection.”
“And you never slept with him?” He wasn’t sure why he needed that affirmation, but he did.
She laughed, the sound tinged with humor. “No. Not even close. Part of the reason for the publicity stunt was because Zane Bishop is gay and his publicist didn’t want that to get out. It was a cover-up. I was his beard.”
Collin’s jaw dropped in shock, and he pulled it shut again. “Holy shit.”
She waggled a finger at him, grinning. “NDA,” she reminded him.
He wouldn’t say a word, but her sexual inexperience now made sense. The one guy she was linked to for three years wasn’t interested in girls. He was floored by the realization. And ridiculously relieved. “So, why did the two of you break it off?”
“It was actually Zane who wanted to end things about eight months ago. He just didn’t feel the situation was fair to me, not that I was interested in dating anyone. So, we made it an amicable split, though his female fans raked me over the coals on social media for breaking his heart,” she added wryly. “He’s still a great friend that I keep in touch with, and I really hope he eventually goes public with the truth. He deserves to be happy.”
“Why did you agree to do it?” he asked quietly.
She thought for a moment. “Three reasons, actually. My mother insisted it would be a great career move,” she said, and rolled her eyes at that. “I really liked Zane and I wanted to help him. But mostly, I wasn’t over you when the whole fake relationship scenario was proposed to me, and being linked to someone just made things overall easier.”
“How so?”
She shrugged. “I wasn’t interested in dating anyone, so it was a cover-up for me, too, in a lot of ways,” she revealed, her gaze brimming with honesty. “You’re the only one I’ve ever been with that way, Collin. Wholly and intimately.”
Blown away by her admission and everything else he’d learned tonight, he reached for Raevynn and pulled her across his lap. He hugged her close to his chest, wondering if she could feel the steady beat of his heart that had been, and still was, directly linked to her. He’d loved her back then, and he loved her now.
She cuddled against him, her hand stroking along the side of his neck and down to his chest in a tender caress. “I wish I could stay right here with you,”
she whispered. “Forever.”
God, he wished that, too. But staying sequestered from the world indefinitely was impossible, and her leaving him was inevitable.
Chapter 14
The following morning, Raevynn woke up teeming with inspiration and her mind clearer than it had been for years in terms of her life, her future, and her career.
With Collin still deep asleep beside her, and not wanting to wake him, she carefully slipped from the bed and quietly got ready for the day ahead. She put on one of the comfortable, casual dresses she’d bought, and after brushing her teeth, she looked into the bathroom mirror and grinned as she took in her short hair, which still looked great—sexy and tousled and all she needed to do was run her fingers through the strands and the soft waves did their own thing. She loved it.
Out in the kitchen, she made a cup of coffee, and while it was brewing, she eyed the prepaid phone that she hadn’t touched since sending her mother that initial text a few days ago. She turned it back on and wasn’t surprised when the device pinged at least a dozen times with different incoming voice and text messages. All from her mother, demanding that she return and reminding her she had upcoming obligations and commitments scheduled the following week. Not to mention a contract waiting for her to sign so that preparations for the new world tour could commence, along with production.
One of the last messages, left the previous evening, had been the most disparaging, accusing Raevynn of being spoiled and selfish and only thinking of herself.
A week ago, a hurtful comment like that would have left her guilt-ridden and devastated, which her mother knew. Today, it was a stark reminder of how manipulative her parent was. And how Raevynn had spent the past seven years being so easily influenced by her mother’s words and actions, to the point that she’d lost her true identity, and her own voice and opinions, along the way.
It had taken running away with the one man who still knew her heart to give her the fortitude to come to those realizations and accept the things she knew had to change.
She sent a quick text back to her mother. I’ll be back at the Plaza Hotel this afternoon. And then she disconnected the phone once again. It was all her mother needed to know, and for the next few hours, she wanted to enjoy the peace and quiet and the time she had left with Collin.
Surprised that she wasn’t more upset by all those messages, she returned to her coffee and stirred in French vanilla creamer. Then, rummaging through the kitchen drawers, she found a notepad and pen and took those items and her mug out to the deck. She sat in one of the comfortable chairs and meditated for a few minutes to readjust her mindset while enjoying the warm morning sunshine on her face and the sense of calm around her.
As she relaxed, the creative side to her brain engaged, a song fully forming in her mind, and an adrenaline rush of excitement shot through her. It had been a while since lyrics had come to her with such clarity, and she picked up the pad of paper and pen and let the words flow. For well over an hour, she wrote the verse, chorus, and bridge and hummed the melody since she didn’t have her guitar with her, feverishly jotting down notes for various chords and riffs to add in later.
Out of everything her career entailed, she realized this was her passion. Writing songs was what made her happy.
She was so immersed in the new song that she didn’t hear Collin come out onto the deck until he quietly sat down in the chair beside hers. Startled by his sudden presence, her body jerked and she placed a hand over her rapidly racing heart.
“Oh, hey, hi,” she said breathlessly. “You kind of surprised me.”
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to,” he said apologetically. “You just looked really intensely focused and I didn’t want to interrupt whatever you were doing.”
“It’s okay.” Relaxing once again, she smiled his way. “I’m just about done.”
Grinning back at her, he leaned over, smoothed his hand over her hair, and placed a soft kiss on her lips, lingering a few extra seconds. He tasted like mint toothpaste and the coffee he held in his other hand. And maybe even a little bit of her future.
“Morning,” he murmured as he settled back into his seat, his sexy voice reminding her of all the hot, erotic things they’d done together the night before. “You were up early.”
She shrugged. “A lot on my mind, I guess.”
He nodded in understanding and glanced at the notepad she held, his gaze narrowing slightly as he tried to decipher her scribbles and handwritten notes. “What are you doing out here all by yourself?”
That spark of joy she’d felt earlier returned, and she didn’t hesitate to share her enthusiasm with him. “I’m writing a brand-new song that came to me. It’s titled ‘Revelations.’”
“Sounds appropriate,” he said with amusement, and took a drink of his coffee.
“It is.” She absently ran her fingers over the heartfelt lyrics, knowing they’d be on her upcoming album. “These past few days have been enlightening, in so many ways. And I’m grateful for it. And for you.”
“What are you going to do now?”
“Well, I told my mom I was coming back this afternoon. It’s time. I need to deal with . . . a lot of things, but at least I’ll be able to do so with a clear conscience.”
“Good. I’m glad.”
She searched his expression and realized that she couldn’t read his emotions. Oh, she’d definitely felt them last night the times he was deep inside her body and looking into her eyes as he took her over the edge. But this morning, it was as though he was stepping back . . . and letting her go because he knew it was the right thing to do. Again.
The love she still harbored for him crowded in her chest, wanting to break free, but she kept the words locked inside. For now. Raevynn knew there was something special between them, and definitely a new foundation that they could both build upon, but how could she ask Collin for a commitment when she didn’t yet know what she could give him in return? She couldn’t make any promises until she resolved things with her mother and career, because when she came back to him, she wanted to do so wholly and completely, with nothing standing between them.
Her time here at the beach with Collin had been like a perfect fairy tale, but it was time to return to reality and everything that waited for her. She just hoped and prayed he waited for her, too.
The ride back to the city was more silent than Collin would have liked, but he left Raevynn alone with her thoughts, knowing she had a lot of issues to sort through and decisions to figure out. Not to mention a controlling mother to confront.
Yeah, he didn’t envy Raevynn the clash of wills that was bound to ensue, but this woman sitting beside him had emerged as strong and confident over the past few days. Decisive and determined. And as much as he would have liked to be by her side to support her when she talked to her mother, this was her battle to fight, and she was a warrior. He had no doubt she’d come out victorious.
As for the two of them being together as a couple beyond these past few days . . . well, he didn’t have a crystal ball and his stomach churned with uncertainties. Did he believe they were still in love with each other? Absolutely. Did he want to spend the rest of his life with her? Undoubtedly. Two people didn’t share the kind of deeply personal conversations and physical intimacies like they did without their hearts being involved. But neither one of them had offered up the declaration, and as difficult as it was for him not to blurt out his feelings for her, he refused to use those emotional words to make her stay.
Bottom line, her life was complicated, and she’d built a successful career as a revered pop star that not many musical artists achieved. The last thing he wanted was for Raevynn to feel torn between him and her singing aspirations, or pressured to give up anything for him, which he’d never ask her to do. He needed to know, if she came back to him, it was of her own free will. Because she wanted him in her life and he fit into it. And right now, he wasn’t sure that he did.
Finally reaching the Plaza Hotel, he pulled up to the d
rop-off area and watched as Raevynn slipped on the oversized, white-framed glasses he’d bought for her at the boardwalk. Between her super-short hair and concealing half her face, there was a good chance people wouldn’t recognize her as she walked through the lobby.
She grabbed the tote bag that she’d put all her things into from the back seat, then turned toward him, a soft smile of gratitude on her lips. “Thank you, Collin. For everything.”
He really did hate those sunglasses. He couldn’t see her eyes. Couldn’t read her expression. “Good luck with your mother,” he said, his tone a bit gruff when he really wanted to say, I love you.
A valet opened the car door for her, and she stepped out of the passenger side of his vehicle. He felt as though his heart was being torn in two inside his chest. He’d given Raevynn his cell phone number and the address to his apartment. He’d told her if she needed him, he was there for her. Always.
So, with his stomach in a thousand knots, he watched her walk away and into the hotel, trying to convince himself he was doing the right thing by letting her go.
Chapter 15
Walking away from Collin was one of the hardest things Raevynn had ever done. She told herself it was temporary, until she laid down some new ground rules with her mother and made her feelings clear on a lot of things. Including the man she loved and wanted in her life for good. He’d given her so much in such a few short days. Focus. Determination. The confidence to know what she wanted out of her life and the courage to dictate her own future.
She grinned to herself. Rapunzel was about to bust free of her tower for good.
Since Raevynn didn’t have a hotel key card for the penthouse on her, or any form of identification, the front desk had to call up to the room to announce her presence. She heard a voice on the other end of the line, then the clerk nodded and hung up the phone.
