“For now, but I don’t think it’s a permanent situation. It’s a lot of house for one person. I can’t believe my dad lived there by himself for so long.”
I had no idea about any of that. I had never been to the house. I knew where it was, but it wasn’t like I knew what it was like to live in a mansion. I thought my house was too big.
“She’s going to be fine,” I said again.
“I’m hoping you will look out for her. I know it’s a lot. I know you have a lot on your plate already, but if you could just make sure she isn’t getting taken advantage of or going completely in the wrong direction, I would appreciate it. I don’t expect you to babysit but give me a heads-up. I know she won’t tell me what’s going on. She’ll tell me everything is fine, even when it isn’t.”
“I’ll watch out for her,” I said, already dreading the job.
“Thanks. I really appreciate it.”
I nodded, thankful the burgers we ordered were delivered. I needed something to stuff in my mouth to keep from saying anything more. Guilt and regret were weighing me down. I felt like a total asshole for my treatment of Cora. She was a woman grieving. Her rash decision to fire Derek was likely because of that grief. I should have been more patient.
She was new to the job, new to being fatherless, and feeling overwhelmed. I wasn’t sure how she would feel about me being the one to look out for her. “You know, she may not be all that thrilled to have me looking over her shoulder. Maybe we should keep this between us.”
He laughed. “You’re right. I think you are probably about the last person she wants checking in on her. For now. I’m sure that will change soon. Like you said, once you guys find your groove, it will be cool.”
I fucking hoped so. I did not want to be the asshole that made Cora’s life more difficult. She was the one who lost her father. I needed to be patient and try to remember she was dealing with more than just losing a boss. She lost her boss and her father.
“We’ll figure it out.”
“Good, because I would hate to have to come back here,” he warned.
I smirked. I wasn’t looking for a fight, but I was pretty sure I could hold my own against him. “I’ll try to keep that in mind.”
Chapter 16
Cora
I blinked, trying to clear my eyes as I stared at the computer screen. It had been a long day. It was actually nice to have the office empty. There were no distractions. Well, a few but those distractions were good. I liked feeling like I was being productive. And it was a great way for me to get some experience with the business.
“I’m going to head out,” Beau said from the doorway.
I looked up from the screen and smiled. “Have a good night.”
“Are you going to be leaving soon?”
“Um, I have some more work to do. I want to go over those specs on that engine my dad was looking at.”
“Cora, those reports and specs and everything else will all wait until Monday. You are young and don’t need to spend every waking minute here. Give yourself a break. Go home. Rest. Take some time for yourself.”
“I will leave soon.”
“Do. Life is too short to sit at a desk all the time.”
He got a look in his eyes. I knew what he was thinking. My dad had spent a lot of time at work. He died too young. He never took the opportunity to go on those vacations he always said he was going to. He didn’t golf as much as he could have. He didn’t do a lot of things because he was so determined to make the company successful.
“I will finish this up and get out of here. I promise.”
“Good. You had a long week. I’ll see you Monday.”
He left, leaving me alone in the quiet. The phones had switched over to voicemail and the only noise was the hum of the computer in the office. It was oddly soothing to be alone in the office I still thought of as my father’s. I remembered coming here after school. He would be in the office working and it would have this same oddly quiet feeling.
I heard footsteps coming down the hall and assumed it was Beau. “Did you forget something?” I called.
“No,” I heard the male voice answer.
My head popped up. Rogan was strolling into my office wearing a pair of khaki cargo shorts, tennis shoes, and a T-shirt. He looked devastating as usual. Then I remembered I was pissed at him. “What are you doing here?”
“I work here,” he answered and took a seat without waiting for my invitation.
“But why are you here now? It’s a Friday night. Don’t you have plans?”
He shrugged one of those beefy shoulders. “Nope.”
“Oh,” I said, suddenly feeling speechless.
“I hoped we could talk,” he said.
If he was going to quit on me, he needed to get it over with. “Okay. What about?”
“Do you know how I got into the job I have now?”
I knew a little of the story but certainly not all of it. “Not entirely.”
“Your dad hired me along with a bunch of other guys when he expanded the company a decade ago. He needed a crew to work at that railyard we were at earlier. He knew me from when I hung out with Oakley on occasion. I had no experience. I worked as a roofer, a flagger, and a slew of other jobs that were leading me nowhere. I worked my ass off for him and it apparently paid off. He noticed me. He took me under his wing. Soon, I was working in the dispatch center. Then I was working with the sales department, and eventually, I landed where I am now.”
I nodded and smiled. “I had heard it was something like that.”
“I was lucky to know your father. He gave me so many chances. I respected him, and I admired him. When I did wrong, he corrected me. He showed me the right way and helped me get back on track. He was always patient with me. I realize I learned from the best and my recent behavior does not reflect my training.”
I wasn’t sure what to say. He was being so sincere. I didn’t want to say anything and screw it up. “My dad was the best teacher.”
“He was. I’m sorry I didn’t take you and your direction seriously. I always said Derek had a chip on his shoulder, but it turns out, I do too.”
“I don’t think that at all. I think this week—these past two weeks—have been extremely difficult. There is no way to know how you will act or feel in a situation like this. You did your best. I could have been forthcoming as well.”
He smiled and nodded. “We have to talk to each other if we are going to make this work. We have to be able to have a game plan when we go into situations like what we had earlier in the week. I don’t expect you to ask for my approval, but if you can give me a heads-up, I can ease the way for you. That’s my job. I’m supposed to make your life a little easier.”
“Speaking of a game plan, I showed up to work today like a dumbass.”
“Why are you a dumbass for showing up to work?”
“Because no one else came in!”
He grinned, flashing his pearly whites. “It’s the last Friday of the month.”
“Yes, so I’ve learned. I’ve spent the day answering phones and trying to do the jobs of twenty people and my own.”
“Why?” he asked with confusion.
“Because you all had the day off.”
“But it was planned. There shouldn’t have been anything for you to do. Everyone knows this day is on the calendar. Deadlines, meetings, and the workload are all planned to accommodate this day.”
“I didn’t know that,” I said with a little irritation. “I didn’t figure it out until Beau came in and told me.”
“There is an email that gets sent out on Thursday. Your secretary would have sent you any pertinent information about the day.”
“I don’t know if I saw it. I don’t know if I looked.”
He leaned forward. “No one wants you to fail,” he said, looking at me with those soulful, honeyed eyes. “Any of us hoping you fail is like passengers on an airplane hoping the pilot crashes. We all want you to succeed. Our lives depend on it.”
&nbs
p; “That’s a little dramatic.”
“It’s true. We all have mortgages, rent, families, and so on. We are here to help you. I know you are the boss, but your dad was an excellent manager. He taught us all very well. He taught us so well, we rarely need to be checked up on. Sure, you will need to stay on top of some stuff, but know this—you have a good team. You have a great team of people who loved your father and want to do right by him.”
He was making me feel like a complete jerk for my behavior earlier. “Thank you for setting me straight.”
“I’m not trying to set you straight,” he corrected. “You are the boss and you are ultimately the one left holding the bag. My job is to support you. I will do that. I will try to hold my tongue, and hopefully, we can get through this transition phase.”
I was already feeling so much better about things. “Thank you for coming in.”
“You’re welcome.”
“It’s why everyone here respects you,” I said.
He raised an eyebrow. “What is that?”
“Because you worked your way up. People like that. They don’t like people like me. They don’t like nepotism.”
He appeared thoughtful for a few seconds. “It isn’t that they don’t like you. It’s that they don’t know you. Nepotism is alive and well, but usually, the kid that takes over has been a part of the business for a while. You’ve just barely gotten your feet wet.”
I laughed. “My feet are certainly wet now. Honestly, I wish I had been on a similar path as yours.”
He scoffed. “I don’t think so. I busted my ass. I still have the scars and pulled muscles to show for it.”
“But your hard work paid off. You are committed to this job because you worked so hard to get here. I don’t think I’m taking anything for granted, but some days, it feels like that. Some days, I feel like I don’t deserve to be in this office.”
Truthfully, I expected him to shower me with pretty words and tell me I did. I should have known better when it came from Rogan.
“Earn it,” he said. “Make yourself believe you deserve it by working hard to earn it.”
I leaned back in my chair. “I plan on it, which is what I was doing all day. I wanted to prove I could keep twenty balls in the air without dropping a single one.”
“You didn’t need to do that. The balls were in the air—suspended. None of us would have just up and left work to be done. You have to trust us to do right by the company. I guess we also have to learn to trust that you will also do right by the company. It’s about trusting everyone. Sometimes, shit happens and there will be issues, but I can tell you, your dad rarely had to dole out any kind of discipline.”
“Good to know.”
He let out a breath, leaned forward, and slapped the armrests. “I’m thirsty. Why don’t I take you out for a drink? We’ll celebrate your first week on the job. We’ll celebrate the fact I’m still employed.”
I laughed, appreciating his sense of humor about the whole thing. “That sounds like a very good plan. I should finish up.”
“Finish up work that has probably already been done?” he asked.
I grimaced, realizing I had wasted my entire day reviewing reports and filling out paperwork when it was probably already done. “You are right. I guess I need to learn to ask more questions.”
“You need to learn to trust your people.”
“I will work on it,” I told him. “It isn’t going to happen overnight.”
“I don’t expect it to.”
I turned off my computer and grabbed my purse. “I’d love for you to tell me more about your rise to the top.”
He grinned. “There isn’t a lot to tell. I was a kid with no direction and no education and no hope of getting one. Your dad was convinced I had something special. It took him a while to convince me of that fact.”
“He always did see the best in people,” I agreed.
I shut off the lights and closed my office door. He seemed so casual and comfortable as we strolled to the elevator. I envied his ability to just shut it all off. I was going to give myself an early heart attack if I kept going the way I had been. I needed to take a step back and appreciate the things I did have. I needed to give myself time.
Unfortunately, I felt like I was racing against a clock. It wasn’t doing me or anyone else any good. Next week would be different. Next week, Rogan and I would be on the same page. I was hoping it would be smoother and he and I could work together instead of at odds.
Which reminded me of the new locomotive I saw in my father’s files. “We aren’t talking about work tonight, right?”
“Hell no,” he said and pushed the button for the elevator. “We are officially off. No shop talk.”
“Okay, but since we are in the elevator, I have one last thing.”
“What’s that?”
“Can we sit down and talk next week about a new engine my dad was looking at? He had a lot of files on it and seemed to be pretty excited about it.”
Rogan got a strange look in his eyes. “We can. He was very excited about it. It was what we were talking about when it happened.”
“Oh,” I said, feeling a knot in my stomach.
“He wanted me to take a look at things. I told him I would. I have.”
I nodded, suddenly feeling very unwell. I considered asking for a raincheck but remembered how horrible my week had been.
I didn’t want to insult him by backing out on our plans.
Chapter 17
Rogan
I wasn’t really a regular at the swanky, executive-only bar on the rooftop of some corporate building, but I knew she would blend right in. I felt a little underdressed, but then again, I didn’t give a shit what they thought about me. I escorted her to a table out of the way.
“Are you a wine drinker?” I asked her.
She shrugged. “I am an equal opportunity drinker. Wine, beer, tequila, I like it all.”
That was unexpected. “Good to know. What are you in the mood for tonight?”
She cocked her head to the side. “What are you drinking?”
“Scotch. Neat.”
“Then that’s what I’ll have.”
When the pretty waitress made her way over to us, sliding two coasters onto the table, I didn’t miss her flirty look. She was very pretty but I wasn’t into blondes. At least, just then I wasn’t. “Two scotches, neat please.”
“Make mine a double,” Cora said.
I grinned and looked at the waitress. “Two doubles please.”
“I never imagined you would frequent these kinds of bars,” she commented, looking around the swanky place.
“I don’t.”
“Then why are you here?”
I laughed. “Because I thought you would be more comfortable here. And it’s quiet in here. Bars on a Friday night tend to be a little rowdy for me. I’m too old for that nonsense.”
“You are not old.”
“I’m not twenty-two.”
“Good point,” she said with a smile.
“Do you hang out at the bars? I bet you are more of a club girl.”
“No, I’m not. Honestly, I have been working my ass off in school the past six years. I did the partying thing my first few years in school. It got old.”
“Your dad said you were a good student.”
She smiled. “He was very proud. I worked hard to make sure I never let him down.”
Our drinks were delivered, each of us taking the first tentative drink.
“How are you doing?” I asked her.
“Fine,” she answered in a way that sounded like she had answered the same thing a hundred times.
“Cora, how are you really doing? I know you’ve had a lot put on your plate. I’m not talking just work. How are you?”
She traced her fingertip around the rim of her glass. “I don’t want to say fine, but I’m not falling apart. It’s just, well, everyday is tough. It’s like, I open my eyes first thing in the morning, and for one very bri
ef second, it’s a normal day. I don’t remember he’s gone. I love that first waking second where I’m still caught between sleep and consciousness. Then I open my eyes, and reality bitch-slaps me.”
I almost choked on the liquor. “That’s a very clear description.”
She shrugged, taking another drink. “It’s the truth. Once I get over that initial shock and hurt, I get out of bed and just move. I get in the shower, I make my coffee, and I eat breakfast. I do this weird thing where I tell myself I just have to do this and then I just have to do the next thing. In a lot of ways, it’s like learning to walk all over again. One step and then another and then another. Soon enough, the day is done, and I can crawl back into bed and anxiously wait for the split second of bliss in the morning.”
My heart ached for her. I finally saw the cracks that she hid so well. I understood her better in that moment. “If you ever want to talk about him, you can talk to me. I know I didn’t know him as well as you did, but your dad was the closest thing to a real father that I’ve ever had.”
“He was a really good guy.”
“Besides me, how has everyone else been at work?”
She grinned, taking another drink. “It’s been good. Okay, not good.”
“Don’t censor yourself with me,” I told her. “I know you are the boss, but we are also partners in a way. We are both working hard to keep this company going. When you are struggling, talk to me. I can help you through it.”
“Thank you,” she said with a big grin. My eyes dropped to her glass that was more than halfway gone. I wasn’t going to lecture her or tell her to take it easy. The woman deserved a good drunk. I doubted she had been drunk since her father died. I certainly had. I could be the sober friend for the night.
“Has Beau been helping out?”
“Yes. It’s just been so much. I can’t even explain how much work it is. I feel like I am trying to step into shoes that are ten times too big.”
“You don’t necessarily have to fill the shoes. You just need to find a pair of similar shoes that fit you.”
She giggled again. “Good analogy. I want to do well. I want to make him proud.”
Backing You Up Page 10
