I smiled, thrilled to hear the news. “I knew she had it in her. Good for her.”
“I wish you all the luck in the world, but I know you aren’t going to need it. You will always land on your feet. If you ever need anything, you call me.”
“Same to you,” I told him. “Think about retiring, Beau. You deserve to sail off into the sunset on that fancy boat you have. You don’t spend nearly enough time on the thing.”
He chuckled. “I’ll keep that in mind. Goodbye, Rogan. It was a real pleasure working with you and watching you grow.”
“Goodbye,” I said and ended the call.
I put the phone down and stared at it for several seconds. It felt like I just closed a chapter in my life. It was over. With one phone call, it was all final. I wasn’t sure how that made me feel. Sad. Relieved?
I looked out the window and took in the ugly scenery. Why in the hell was I staying in Dallas? Initially, I chose Dallas because it was far enough away from her but not too far.
Beau made it clear she was doing all right without me. There was nothing keeping me in Texas. I could go anywhere in the country and start fresh. Hell, I could go anywhere in the world.
But I was a Texas boy through and through. I wasn’t sure I could make it anywhere else. Then again, I wasn’t sure I could stay this close to her and not be tempted.
I needed to do what was best for her and the company. I needed to get away. I flopped back down on the sofa. The moment I walked into Ben’s office that morning, I had felt the shift. I had felt the changing wind. I had no idea what it meant at the time, but I did now. That fucking breakfast burrito triggered a series of events that no one could have seen coming. Certainly not me.
Those final seconds of his life that I held his head in my lap had been the ending of a part of my life as well. A part of me died with him on the floor that day. I decided it was worthy of getting drunk. I was grieving another loss.
I snatched up the key to the shitty apartment and headed down the stairs. I wasn’t driving. I knew there was a bar on the corner. That was my destination. I needed to get drunk. I would allow myself one good drunk before I pulled myself up and moved on with my life.
I walked into the bar and looked around. It wasn’t a dive bar, but it wasn’t exactly the rooftop bar I had taken Cora to either. I didn’t care. Beer was beer.
“Hey there, handsome,” the female bartender said as she sidled up to where I was sitting on one of the many empty stools. She had big Texas hair along with big Texas boobs. The woman was beautiful, but I wasn’t interested.
“Hello, yourself,” I said with a friendly smile.
“What can I get for you?”
“Whatever is on tap will do.”
She grabbed a glass and filled it before sliding it over to me. I dropped a ten on the bar and took a drink. “I haven’t seen you around here before.”
“I’m a recent transplant,” I told her.
“And this is where you landed?” she asked with a laugh.
I grinned, taking another drink. “I think this is a temporary situation.”
“Good plan. Where are you from?”
“Houston,” I told her.
“What are you running from?”
I smiled. “What gives you the impression I’m running?”
“Because I have eyes and I can see the pain on your face. Let me guess, girlfriend? Wife?”
“Neither,” I answered.
“Ah,” she said with a knowing smile. “Girl trouble. She cheat?”
“No!” I answered before realizing I’d just admitted it was a girl.
“Did you cheat?” she asked with an accusing look.
“No. There was no cheating. It was never a thing.”
She let out a long sigh, putting her hand over her heart. “Unrequited love.”
“Something more along the lines of forbidden love.”
“Oh, a real-life Romeo and Juliet?”
It was an apt description. “Something like that.”
“You have come to the right place. We specialize in the drowning of sorrows, especially those that involve broken hearts.”
“Thanks.”
I didn’t think I was suffering a broken heart, but I was suffering from something. Alcohol was my cure. Tomorrow, the sun would come up, the haze of the alcohol would fade, and all I would be left with was the stark reality of my life.
I had no one. I had nothing.
Chapter 36
Cora
I wasn’t interested in any of the reports that were sitting on my desk. I knew what they would say. I knew I was kicking ass. I was fairly confident in my ability to run the company. Okay, that was a tiny bit of an understatement. I wasn’t exactly confident, but it was getting there.
I still felt a little weak in the knees when there was a big decision to be made, but I just pushed through it. I thought about what my dad would do, what Rogan would do, and I just moved forward.
There was a knock on my door. I looked up and saw Beau standing in the doorway. “Good morning.”
“Hi there,” I said with a smile.
“Do you have a minute?”
“Of course, come in.”
He sat down, looking very tired. I worried about him. He was a couple years older than my father and worked just as hard. I couldn’t even think about what I would do if I lost him.
“How are you?” he asked.
“I’m good. How are you?”
He sighed. “I’m all right, a little tired.”
“Are you okay?” I asked with concern.
He smiled. “I’m just fine. I’m a little short on caffeine this morning. I’ll get the old motor going.”
“I know the feeling,” I said. “It was a hot weekend, wasn’t it?”
“It was too hot. I think I might be getting too old for the heat. I am going to start migrating.”
I burst into laughter. “That sounds like a good idea.”
“I saw Oakley. He looks good.”
“He was only in town for a couple of days,” I answered. I was still irritated with my brother. “He had some competition or something to get back to.”
“I understand.”
“He told me you called him,” I said.
He looked properly guilty. “I promised I would check in with him, let him know how you were doing.”
“It wasn’t a big deal, Beau. Do you know he told Rogan to leave town?”
He rubbed his forehead. “No, I didn’t know that. I should have known he would react like that. He’s very protective of you. Your father wanted him to take care of you, and that’s what he is trying to do. It’s what we are both trying to do. I know you are a strong, capable woman. You’ve proven that, but you are still the little girl we all knew so many years ago.”
“I understand and I appreciate what you guys are all trying to do, but I need some room to make my own mistakes.”
He gave me a thumbs-up. “I will do my best to lighten up.”
“Thank you.”
“Did you see the weekly reports?” he asked.
“I did. It all looks good to me.”
He smiled, nodding. “It looked very good to me. How are you feeling about things?”
“About the company?”
“Yes.”
“I think I’m settling into my role. Why? Have you heard something?”
“Only good things.”
“No investors are complaining?” I asked.
“Not a single peep. I expect by the end of this quarter, they are going to be singing your praises.”
That made me happy. “Good.”
“I talked to Rogan,” he said.
I froze, afraid to show any emotion. I had spent the entire weekend trying to find him, to no avail.
“Oh,” I said, trying to sound light and breezy, but I ended up sounding squeaky and nasally.
“Yes.”
“How is he?”
“He is being Rogan. A little stubborn if I do s
ay so myself.”
“Gee, you don’t say. Where is he?”
“He’s choosing to stay away because he thinks it’s for the best.”
“The whole thing is over,” I said. “There has not been anything more said about the two of us. It has blown over. He can come back to his job.”
“He won’t do that.”
“Why?” I asked, throwing my hands into the air. “Why not? Are you telling him to stay away? I know Oakley did and that has been dealt with.”
“I did suggest he take some time off,” he confessed. “I was hoping it would not be permanent. That is his choice. He is the one that has chosen to make it a permanent situation.”
“Because he doesn’t know it’s okay!”
“He does know,” he said in a soft voice. “He knows. He’s proud of the work you have accomplished. I am as well. He is confident you can do this without him. You’ve proven it time and again. That’s what I wanted to talk to you about.”
I looked at him, feeling there was something coming that I wasn’t going to like. “What would that be?”
“Your dad and I used to spend a lot of time together talking about our futures. We talked about the company and what we saw ourselves doing. Back then, we thought we would be a couple of old guys spending our days fishing. I can’t explain why neither of us recognized our own mortality. We are—were—both practical guys. I guess you just don’t want to think about it.”
“I don’t want to think about it.”
“As we got older, I think we began to understand the idea we wouldn’t live forever. He made me promise if I was the last man standing, I would look out for the company. We weren’t sure if you would be stepping into the role, but we were hoping you would. We spent a lot of time talking about you. This company was your father’s third child. It was my only child. I’ve nurtured it. I’ve watched it grow and I can step back and see it is in good hands. It’s time to pass the torch.”
“I’m glad you are feeling better about things,” I told him.
“I am feeling a lot better, which is why I’m putting in for my retirement.”
I waited for him to laugh. I waited for him to say in the future he was going to retire. “Beau, what are you saying?”
“I’m saying you are set to make this company better than me or your father could have ever dreamed. You’re an innovative thinker. You see things a little differently than the rest of us and that is a good thing.”
“Beau, you are a huge part of the success here. I haven’t done this on my own. You and Rogan are the ones who deserve the credit.”
“I’m so proud of you,” he said with a fond smile. “I’ve always thought of you as my own daughter. I’m happy as hell to be a part of your life. With that said, I’m tired. I’m so tired. I’m ready to take some time to enjoy my golden years.”
“Beau, you can’t leave me. First Rogan, now you. I know you are confident I can do this, but I need you.”
“You don’t need me. I’m old and have stayed on too long as it is.”
I shook my head. “No way. You are not old.”
“Thank you for saying it, but I know the truth.”
“Beau, really, what am I going to do?”
“I will tell you what you need to keep this company moving forward.”
“What is that?”
He smiled. “Rogan. You need to figure out a way to bring Rogan back in.”
I slapped my hand to my forehead. “I know I need him back, but I don’t know how to make that happen. He talks to you, but he won’t talk to me. I had to bribe his friend just to tell me where he was. And all I got was the city. How can I bring him back if he doesn’t want to come?”
He smiled. “I guess you are going to have to get creative.”
“When are you leaving?”
“As soon as I can get things finalized. I can’t explain it, but I have had an epiphany. I woke up and realized I wanted something different for the last years of my life. God willing, I have years. I would never leave you if I didn’t think you could handle things. You’ve got it well in hand.”
“You’ll stay until I get Rogan back?”
He shrugged. “I’m not sure.” He got up and slipped a piece of paper on my desk. “You know what you need to do. I trust you will figure out how to make it happen.”
He walked out, leaving me feeling a little shell shocked. I felt like my inner circle kept shrinking. I was growing really tired of losing people. I reached for the paper Beau left. It was an address. I grinned when I realized it was Rogan’s address in Dallas. Beau was pointing me in the right direction.
Now, I needed to figure out how to go about getting a man that didn’t want anything to do with me to call me back or take my calls. I needed advice. I grabbed my phone and called Leslie. She was an unbiased party and would tell me what to do next.
“Hey, you. Why are you calling me on a Monday morning? Don’t you have a bunch of business things to do?”
“I do but I have something more important to deal with.”
“What’s up?”
“Okay, so you know about the Rogan drama?” I asked.
“I do. You are missing your man.”
“He’s not my man, but I am missing him.”
“Because you want to get laid?”
“Oh my god, will you focus?”
She laughed. “I’m teasing. What is going on?”
“Beau is retiring, which will leave me all alone. He thinks I need Rogan back.”
“And you want him back. I’m confused about the problem.”
“Rogan doesn’t want to come back. I have tried calling. I tried bribing his friend. It was made clear he doesn’t want to talk to me. Then I find out Beau and he are still in touch. How do I know this, you ask? Because Beau just gave me Rogan’s address.”
“Didn’t you say he moved?”
“Yes, to Dallas. Beau has his address.”
“Go get your man,” she said with certainty. “I don’t know why you are asking me for permission. You know what you want, and your mentor has just told you what to do.”
“But what if he rejects me again?”
“I think you need to make that call when it happens. You need to figure out if he is rejecting you because he thinks it’s what is best for you or rejecting you because he doesn’t want anything to do with you or your company.”
“How am I going to know the difference?” I asked.
“You’re a smart girl.”
I should have known her advice would be plainspoken. She didn’t use colorful words or get philosophical. She just said what she thought. “Thank you for the talk.”
“Anytime. If you go to Dallas, let me know. I’ve got a client waiting.”
“I’ll talk to you later. Remember, you are in an uptown place. No hummers.”
She was giggling when she hung up the phone. I stared at the address. I kept telling myself I needed to listen to the people around me, the people that cared about me and were only trying to help. Beau had basically told me to go get Rogan. Leslie was as well. I knew better than to ask Oakley’s advice. He would not be thrilled to have me chasing Rogan.
I stuck the paper in my purse and tried to focus on work. My brain was running numbers and scenarios instead of focusing on what I was reading. Without Rogan and Beau, I wasn’t sure I could do it. I would need to promote or hire someone to fill the void.
I couldn’t imagine working with anyone else. There was a rhythm with Rogan and Beau. I didn’t need to ask them what they were doing. I just knew things got done.
Now, I would be the one tasked with getting things done.
Chapter 37
Rogan
I was sitting on the couch, working on my laptop when I heard something. I couldn’t quite put my finger on what the sound was, but something made me turn and look behind me. The initial shock at seeing the rodent scurrying across the floor of the kitchen passed within seconds.
I nearly threw my laptop as I ju
mped up from the couch and rushed toward the kitchen. I didn’t know why, but there had been a sudden invasion. Maybe the little bastard had been there all along but hid from me, or maybe he just moved in. Either way, I didn’t like it.
“God dammit!” I yelled, using the broom to chase the stupid fucking mouse back into the hole it had crawled out of.
I couldn’t do it anymore. The apartment was a shithole. I didn’t know where I was going but I was getting the hell out of the apartment. I could not live in the rundown building any longer. My job search was not going to plan. My whole fucking life was not going to plan.
“Fucker,” I hissed, shoving the Brillo pad the landlord recommended I use to cut down on the vermin. I didn’t see how it was going to work, but I did it anyway. I was willing to do just about anything to fight against the little bastards. I had poison out. I bought some supersonic thing, but the damn thing wouldn’t leave me alone.
I washed my hands, questioning every decision I’d made in the last month. Somewhere, I’d went off the rails. I didn’t necessarily not know when that moment was, but it just seemed like I was paying a huge price for an innocuous decision. Sleeping with Cora wasn’t exactly a bad thing. We were both willing and did nothing wrong.
When was the bad juju going to stop?
When I moved. That was the belief I was working under. I wasn’t supposed to be in Texas. All the unseen forces were telling me to get out. Not just the unseen forces. I rubbed the spot on my cheekbone that only recently returned to normal color after Oakley’s little greeting.
There was a knock on the door, interrupting my thoughts. I assumed it was the landlord bringing me more magic remedies that would stop the mice from invading. I was done with the traditional methods and ready to burn the fucking building to the ground. I stomped toward the door and jerked it open. I was angry and frustrated and at my wits end. I was ready to lay into someone and express that frustration.
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