“Right.”
“Take your clothes off!” he yells at me, scaring the shit out of me.
“What?” I ask.
“Let’s have sex,” he says waggling his eyebrows at me.
I burst into laughter, and he follows.
“Yeah, I figured that would do it. Seriously take your clothes off and put your bathing suit on. Pronto! I don’t have all day woman!” he says as he exits my room.
I find Kip on the deck with our surfboards, and he motions for me to follow him to the beach. I can lose myself for hours in the ocean, attempting to dominate the force of a wave, and I do. For hours Kip and I surf up and down the beach. I attempt waves I would never attempt before today. I need to control it because I can’t control anything else right now. The waves put me in my place over and over again, showing me that Mother Nature is bigger than I will ever be, but it doesn’t stop me. I pop right back up on my board and try again. Fuck Mother Nature, and Jagger, and Claudia, and the entire fucking world that thinks my life is entertainment.
***
Henley
For the next three weeks, I stay home and write down all the shit in my head. I also surf and eat whatever food is thrown in my face by Kip. He’s my self-proclaimed psychologist now, scary I know.
Somehow putting my thoughts down on paper expels the hold my demons have on me. It doesn’t completely rid them of their hold on me, but the grip is loosened, and that’s a start. Jagger tries to call me several times a day, and each call goes unanswered. I delete the voicemails and texts before I can hear or read them. Kip, Koi, Rhys, Griffin, and Cam lurk around the house, but give me my space. Kai and the guys from Resin even hang around the house. Koi has helped a little with the songwriting and pushes me to concentrate on it. There are times he has to put some of the lyrics down and walk away from me because they are too much for even him.
Tonight, Kai, Rhys, Griffin, and I are attending an album launch for Fallen Men. Broken Access is attending too, which means I will have to avoid Jagger like the fucking plague, but I love Fallen Men and always have an affinity for fellow Southerners. Getting our faces back into the scene on a social level is important because the impending album will spread far and wide by way our peers. They reach much of the industry, with fans being of the utmost importance.
Jessica arrived in California a few days after the guys did, and she scheduled my beloved designer and makeup artist Brandy to style me for the evening. Brandy selected a black mini dress, with a tank style silhouette, a cowl neck inlaid with lace, and a full lace back with a skirted bottom. When I say this dress is a mini dress, it barely covers my ass. Note to self: do not bend over. She pairs the sexy number with a six-inch ruffled leopard peep-toe stilettos, styles my hair in loose curls down my back, and my eyes in my famous cat eye smoky look.
The limo arrives at nine, and Rhys enters my room to announce its time to go.
“Holy mother of God, you are absolutely edible, woman!”
“Thank you! Just don’t let me bend over tonight.”
“Fuck that, I am dropping shit all night long, and come to think of it, my back has been bothering me, so I doubt I will be able to pick it up myself,” he says as he grabs his back and feigns pain.
I roll my eyes and follow Rhys into my living room where Griffin whistles, and Kai stares. The heat in his eyes tells me exactly what’s on his mind. Why does he have to be so damn hot? I am fragile right now, cobwebs are forming in my vagina, and I just don’t know how much longer I can take it.
Kai offers his arm, “You are… gorgeous.”
I offer a shy smile, take his arm, and follow him to the limo. He sits across from me in the limo, and I have to remember to cross my legs so I don’t give him a show. Although, come to think of it, I might just give him a show. Cobwebs people, cobwebs.
We arrive in style at the album launch at a downtown club, and are ushered in by Maurice and Cory, but not before the vultures descend and take the money shot. I almost want to bend over and give them a money shot, but that didn’t pan out well for Brittany Spears, so I best hold onto my mischievous thoughts.
The first several hours pass, and my nerves are on edge. I wait and wait for a glimpse of Jagger, but I can’t tell you if it’s because I want to see the man I love, or because I am freaked the fuck out to see him. Part of me wants him to chase me and tell me all the things I want to hear, and part of me wants him to be smart and keep his distance. Luckily, Kai, Rhys, and Griffin are by my side all night, and the place is packed, so if I can’t see him, perhaps he can’t see me. Kai guides me around the room introducing us to other bands, and his hands remain at my lower back most of the night. He doesn’t know about the cobwebs, so each time he touches my back to guide me along, or rubs it just a little with his thumb while we mingle, I feel flames shooting out of my honey pot. I catch myself looking for a dark corner in which I could easily molest this fine ass man. Hmmm… focus grasshopper.
I excuse myself to the ladies room. Instead of braving the inside restroom, I visit a bar in a massive courtyard at the back of the club. I grab a beer from the bar, and strut myself over to the back corner of the courtyard where the ladies' restroom sits. I reach for the doorknob when I hear his voice.
“You fucking him?”
I whip my head around to see Jagger standing in the shadows a few feet from me. My breath hitches, and my body screams for him. I process his question, and the anger pours from me.
“Excuse me?” I snap.
“You fucking Kai Scott?”
“Not that it is any of your business, but no, I am not fucking Kai,” I fire at him.
“From where I stood all night, it looked like he is well-acquainted with your body. You lying to me?”
“Unlike some people, I don’t lie about things like… I don’t know, babies, sexual partners, late night, secretive phone conversations, and crazy ass maybe baby mamas. I don’t omit important shit or lie because I am a chicken shit!” I raise my voice.
“Does he know you are mine?”
“I am not yours! Don’t you have a potential baby to prepare for, instead of worrying about who is or isn’t fucking me?”
He grabs me by the elbow a little too hard and pulls me to him. His lips lightly touch the outside of my ear, and no matter how angry I am, I want to hear him call out my name when I milk him for everything he is worth.
“You may be mad, and think you are done with me, but you are never done with me. You are MINE, and will always be mine. Never forget that, Henley. So Kai Scott, or any other motherfucker who thinks he is getting in between those legs has another thing coming. You are MINE!” he grits out between his teeth as his left hand navigates the curve of my body.
I yank my arm from his, and turn on my heel to push the one room restroom door open, as I turn around to lock it; Jagger pushes himself through the door. He kicks it closed, and locks it. When he faces me, his eyes are filled with pure rage, fueled by unadulterated jealousy.
“Get the fuck out!” I scream.
“You want to fuck him, Hen?” he asks with a smug grin on his face.
That grin is not a good thing. He doesn’t lose his shit often, but when the fuse on his temper ignites, he has a hard time reining it in. Collateral damage be damned.
“Fuck you, Jagger! Who the fuck do you think you are? You don’t get to put me through the shit you have, and question anything about my fucking life!”
“Fuck me? Is that what you want baby?” he asks as he takes a few steps towards me.
I take a few steps back, and his smug ass grin returns. Fuck him! I don’t even respond to the stupid shit coming out of his mouth.
“Kai not hitting that shit right? I bet he can’t make you come like I do. You need me to remind you?”
“I told you I am not fucking him! Are you listening to me, asshole?”
He takes a few steps closer, and I retreat the last few steps until my back hits the wall. The crystal blue i
n his eyes is so bright with rage; they twinkle like stars in the sky. He closes the distance between us, and touches my face with his hand.
“Baby, he had his hand all on that back. I saw him rubbing skin off through that shit you call a dress. It looked like he was remembering what all that soft skins is like underneath.”
He drags his hand up the outside of my left thigh while his other hand remains on my face. He inches it over to the top, inside of my thigh, and the cobwebs break loose. Oh fuck me; he knows how to push my buttons.
“Tell me baby, do you scream his name when he’s fucking you?”
“Fuck you, Jagger!”
“That can be arranged. I didn’t figure he was enough for you,” and his lips crash on mine.
At first, I love the comfort and security kissing him gives, but then I remember Claudia, and I bite his bottom lip so hard I draw blood. He pulls his head back, and I slap his face. He looks stunned for a moment, but in a matter of seconds he is on me again. He kisses hard and rough, and I kiss back, biting his lip as hard as I can without drawing blood again. Each time I do, he pulls back enough to show me the fucked up smile on his face. The pain feels good to him and inflicting it gives me the illusion of being in control.
He reaches between my legs, and rips my panties off, then plunges his fingers in. I moan into his mouth and push my fingers under his shirt and up his amazing back. He pushes the front of my dress down, and sucks and bites on my nipples. It feels so amazing. I hear his zipper go down, and then he bends down my body just enough to place his wrists and forearms underneath the bend in my legs. He raises me onto the wall, and thrusts into me. He pushes my legs against the wall, giving him complete access to go as deep into my body as his own can go. He fucks me hard, and grunts with each thrust.
“Does he fuck you like this, baby?”
I don’t answer him, because I’ve already said twice, I am not fucking Kai.
“Does he make you moan like I do? Nobody can fuck this pussy like I do.”
His eyes are on me the entire time, so I keep closing them because I don’t want to see the pain in his eyes. He did this to us and deserves no sympathy from me.
“Can he make you come? Does he know what it feels like when your tight little cunt explodes on his cock?”
I wish he would shut the fuck up. He continues to thrust, his body plastered against mine, knees against the wall, and his heart beating incredibly fast. I claw my fingers into his back as I draw closer to my release, and he continues to spew shit out of his mouth.
“Dig in, baby. Dig into my back. I want to remember you were there. I want to remember what you sound like when you quiver on my cock, but I want you to remember who gave you this cock.”
He fucks more, and the tingles rise from my toes all the way to my center.
“Give it to me, Henley. It’s mine. Give it to me. Come all over my cock, baby,” he says through his own grunts of pleasure.
I wish he would shut the fuck up! Jesus, my orgasm leaves me.
“Shut the fuck up, Jagger, or nobody is coming here!”
He laughs, loving his control over whether I get off.
“Did you lose it? I can give it back to you because it’s my mother fucking pussy.”
He kisses me deep and hard and continues to fuck me like a god.
“I love how you milk my cock. That tight little pussy gets me every time. Come for me, baby. I want you to explode all over me. I want to feel it,” he growls getting impatient.
He thrusts some more, and the tingle starts in my toes again, and rises. The orgasm hits me; I gasp, throw my head back against the wall, and scream out his name.
“I love the way you come. I love how your pussy quivers. I am going to blow my load in you,” he says as his body stiffen, and his cum shoots inside me.
We remain on the wall catching our breaths. My hips ache from being forced open at such an unnatural angle. My nipples throb, and my mouth is swollen from his assault of kisses. When he finally pulls out of me, and allows me to slide down the wall to my feet, the guilt washes over me. I feel dirty and violated. He steps away from me, and I hear the sink running water, but I keep my eyes locked on the floor. Moments later, he steps in front of me, and runs a wet paper towel between my legs, cleaning me, with only a level of familiarity and intimacy lovers have. His lips brush my forehead as he cleans me, but I turn away from him.
He steps back and hear the paper towel hit the trashcan in the opposite corner of the room.
Neither of us speaks for a bit. What words say “I’m angry and you used me to the point I feel odious.” I’m angry at my body for betraying me and my heart for allowing it.
“Hen…” he whispers.
I tug my dress down, walk to the mirror to fix my makeup and hair, ignoring his plea for my words. Once I don’t appear like I was just fucked in a public restroom, against a wall, I turn on my heel and leave him behind.
Chapter 10
Jagger
I watch as the woman who owns the heart in my chest walks out that bathroom door. I sink to the floor and pull my knees to my chest. Head in my hands, I try to figure out what the fuck just happened. Did I hurt her? The emotional current that runs between us is one thing, but I would never hurt her physically. I was blinded by rage when I watched Kai Scott’s hand on her for over two hours. She not once looked uncomfortable with his hand there and never moved away from his touch. She’s mine, and he can’t have her. The thought of her moving on is too much to bear. I can’t live in a world where she doesn’t exist, but living in a world where she isn’t mine doesn’t sound like much of a life either.
I am the bad boy of rock-n-roll, and have fucked enough pussy to last a lifetime, but Hen, that woman’s brought me to my knees since I was a kid. She has a fiery spirit, and a kind heart. Her long blonde hair frames the most beautiful face I have ever seen. Stormy grey eyes peek from under long, dark eyelashes she inherited from her grandfather. Her smile lights up an entire fucking room and makes the heart in your chest skip a beat. Her silky, soft, flawless olive skin is addictive. It’s so soft it’s difficult to believe it is real. The way it feels when she is under me… like I am making love to a goddess.
I somehow got her to fall in love with me, and I fucked it all up. Claudia fucking Windsor is a name I will never forget. The night I fucked her, I was high on blow, and I couldn’t even bust a nut. The girl is pretty, but I knew from the get-go she was shallow bitch and out for the notoriety sticking my dick in her entails. I tried to imagine she was Henley the entire night, but every time she spoke the bile rose into my throat. I just gave up, and months later the bitch says she’s pregnant. Every time I have to be around her, or speak to her on the phone, she puts Henley down, and compares herself to the mother fucking Guitar Goddess. Who in the hell has the audacity to compare themselves to her? I’m aware she called the photographers the day the story leaked. Samantha is the one who leaked the shit about the emails, and I am caught in the middle of a cluster fuck I can’t seem to get any control over.
How am I supposed to keep her mine, when the entire world knows what I did, and knows she is fair game? The actors, musicians, athletes, and anyone else in these industries will want her. Shit, they already want her, but when she is available the pricks will come out of the woodwork, and let’s be honest, she is a dick magnet.
I pick myself off the floor, wash my hands, and step out of the restroom. I immediately make eye contact with Kip across the courtyard and he shakes his head. He knows what I just did, or at least has an inkling. Kip loves Henley like his sister, and our love is brotherly, but right is right and wrong is wrong, and what I did was wrong. He knows it as well as I do. I search for my gorgeous blonde, and see her at a bar not far from Kip, engaged in a conversation with Brent Smith, Fallen Men’s front man. Brent is a great guy and we’ve had some fun times over the years, but the rage festers inside me again.
Brent hands her a beer, and Henley inclines her head i
n thanks to him. He looks like he is staring at God himself, and in all actuality he is. I know star struck when I see it, and he’s in genuine awe. You can always tell when someone meets her for the first time. People always expect her to be disengaged in conversation, mysterious, uppity, elusive, and unattainable even. Her genuine personality is always a shock for fellow rockers. Her intelligence and witty charm is addictive. She was raised in the south by damn good people and has never cast an impervious air. She is so easy to talk to. I would give anything to wrap her up in the hammock on her deck and talk about that stupid fucking pig she wants. A pig I would love simply because she loves the little bastard.
I stand in the shadows for some time and watch the banter between Henley and Brent. He doesn’t touch her, and seems to be just happy to talk to her, to discover what lies within the goddess. The rage boils down a bit until I see Kai step up to her with his hand placed on her back. I see Brent notice the intimate gesture, and his eyes slightly rise in surprise. Yeah, buddy, I saw that shit too. Barry, Zach, and Eric join Brent, and the looks on their faces are also ones of awe. I thankfully see Hen pull away from Kai, and he leaves the group. She shakes each of their hands and Zach’s charming ass goes in for a hug, and I smile when I see her head fall back in laughter. Her laugh is so infectious, and the boys’ smiles show just that. Thank you Zach, keep Kai’s ass away from her. Zach’s my boy, so I know he is looking out.
“Do I want to know what you did?” Kip approaches.
“That I am a fucking asshole?”
“To what extremes did your assholery go?” he asks.
“I am a fuck up, Kip. I saw Kai’s hands all over her and lost my shit. Accused her of fucking him, followed her into the bathroom, and fucked her into next Sunday. I was rough. I just couldn’t get all the shit in my head straight.”
“I saw her walk up, looking like she was ready to cry. I get this shit with Claudia all happened before her, but you fucked up there. She needs time, and you might see her with other men, but you can’t lose your shit every time you see a prick next to her. Nothing has happened between her and Kai, and I don’t think she intends for it to. He is attracted to her, but who the fuck isn’t?”
Guitar Face Series Box Set: Books 1-4 Page 35
