Even when she was with him, I wanted her so fucking bad she was all I thought about, but now that I know she isn’t his—I need her, and she’s a need I can’t fucking have. It makes zero sense why I can’t move on from this pathetic crush I have on her.
Time and time again, I try to lose myself in other women. And I always do it in front of her, hoping she’ll be the stronger one between the two of us.
If I can make her hate me enough, maybe she won’t want me. And if she doesn’t want me, maybe I’ll start to want her a little less.
Maybe.
Being alone with her in the middle of the night with a few bottles of alcohol probably isn’t the best way to carry out this plan. But I’ll be damned if I deny this moment. It turns out I’m a glutton for punishment.
“Here,” Lily whispers, even though she could probably shout right now and no one would be in earshot to hear it.
The two of us stop in front of the tall fence that blocks the park in. Currently, we’re on the outskirts of the park, standing on a farmer’s property right next to the city land. All we have to do is climb this fence, walk a little farther, and we’ll be met with the lake all to ourselves.
Lily’s hands rest on her hips. “How the hell do we get up that?” Her neck cranes as she looks all the way up the towering fence.
I do the same, thinking of a plan of action. “It does look taller in person.”
“Whose bright idea was it to do this?”
I playfully bump my shoulder against hers. “Uh, this was definitely your plan, Lily Bear.”
Her white teeth shine in the moonlight with her smile. “I know, and we aren’t backing out now. Let’s climb!” She carefully sticks her foot in the fence, reaching up as high as she can.
I stand behind her, waiting to catch her if she falls backward. Impressively, she manages to maneuver her way up the chain-link fence pretty smoothly. I’m awarded the perfect view of how her strong muscles work as she climbs higher and higher. There’s no doubt when you look at her that she’s an athlete. Every inch of her body screams that she puts hard, dedicated work into it. The backpack on her back bounces up and down as she climbs, higher and higher.
Finally, she reaches the top, where she swings a leg over to the other side. She now straddles each side of the fence. I watch her look down, and even from my vantage point, I see her eyes widen. “Yeah um, how do I get down the other side?” Lily asks, bringing her gaze to mine.
“You’re going to have to climb down.” I put my own foot in the fence and begin to make my way up, but I’m barely a few feet off the ground when the fence starts to groan.
“Get your fat ass off this, Aspen! You’re going to make it fall!” There’s panic in her voice as she holds onto the top of the fence for dear life.
My feet hit the dirt when I jump back down and lean my head to look up at her. “Okay, I’ll wait until you’re down. But you’re going to have to find a way to get down.”
“Why couldn’t you have been a gentleman and gone first? At least then you could have tried to catch me before I fell to my doom.” She cautiously swings the leg over that was on my side of the fence.
“I was trying to be a gentleman and make sure that if you fell backward, I’d be there to catch you.”
“Aspen, I don’t know if I’d even trust you to catch me in a trust-fall exercise.” I watch through the spaces in the chain-link as she turns her body around and slowly starts to descend. A large gust of wind comes through, causing her to shriek and flatten her body against the fence.
“I’m going to just ignore everything you just said,” I chide, cautiously watching her get closer and closer to the ground.
Finally, her feet make a sound as she reaches the ground. She gives me a beaming smile, letting out a long burst of air she’d probably been holding for a while.
“Your turn.” The smile on her face is still wide, and she raises those dark eyebrows in competition.
Challenge accepted.
I make sure my own backpack full of alcohol is centered on my back before taking a few steps away from the fence. My feet get a running start before I’m leaping into the air. I twist my fingertips into the fence as soon as I come in contact with it, making sure to weave them in tightly. My body shifts to the right slightly, my legs dangling in the air before I can get them planted into the gaps of the fence.
As soon as I’ve gained my balance, I swiftly climb up.
“Is that necessary?” Lily shouts from below me, jutting one foot out.
All I do is smile as I swing over the top of the fence and start my descent. As soon as I’m a safe distance from the ground, I let go, falling the rest of the way and landing gracefully on my feet.
“Showoff,” Lily mutters, flicking her hair away from her shoulder.
“You love it.” I tap the tip of her nose, giving her my best smile.
Her eyes narrow, and then she slaps my hand away and turns around. “Let’s go, slowpoke.” She doesn’t bother to whisper anymore, allowing her voice to carry through the woods as I follow her lead.
Neither of us talk as we travel the short distance to the water. Eventually, we make it through the clearing of the trees, the sprawling lake coming into view. The water sits still, barely a ripple to be seen. Lily’s flip-flops make loud slapping noises against the wood dock as we make our way down it.
Once we reach the very end, the two of us silently slip our shoes off and sit down, letting our toes dip into the water. There’s a loud zipping noise as Lily unzips her black backpack. She pulls out a bottle of wine, holding it out to me in offering.
I shake my head at her. “Ladies, first.”
She rolls her eyes. “So now you’re attempting to be a gentleman?” She unscrews the top and brings her plump lips to it. I’m far too fascinated with watching the way her throat works as she drinks.
I catch myself after staring a few seconds too long. “I’ve always been a gentleman.”
Lily pulls the bottle from her mouth and hands it to me. Our hands barely brush as I take it from her, guzzling down almost half the bottle to try to take the edge off. Being this close to her has my senses in overdrive. It feels all kinds of wrong to be out here with her all alone—a wrong that also feels right. It has me thinking thoughts I shouldn’t be having. She’s my best friend’s sister, and I need to constantly remind myself of that.
Maverick is the kind of friend you only have once in a lifetime; I can’t mess that up because I want his sister.
But damn.
I. Want. Her.
I want her more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life.
And right now, it’s hard to think of anything else. I set the wine bottle down between us, taking her in next to me. Both of her tan legs dangle off the edge of the dock, slowly moving around in the water. She has on her normal pair of jean shorts, short enough that when she bends over, I get a peek at the bottom of her perfect ass cheeks, causing all the blood to rush south no matter how hard I try to will it not to. She has on a baggy T-shirt, loose enough to hide the curves I know she has. Even in the simplest of outfits, she’s stunning. It’s in the way she carries herself. She’s extremely confident, but it never comes off in a way that makes it seem like she’s better than anyone else. She’s just unapologetically herself, and accepts every other person as they are—one of her most beautiful qualities.
Her long dark hair runs all the way down her back. So long it almost brushes along the wood when she leans her head back and looks at the stars.
I force myself to pull my gaze from her before it becomes too obvious. I reach for my own backpack, unzipping it and pulling out the container of Fireball I stuffed in there. The fiery cinnamon taste burns my tongue as I drink, but I welcome it, swallowing until I feel the buzz I desperately need settling in.
“Don’t hog it all,” Lily mutters, annoyed. She reaches out and snatches the Fireball from my hands, taking a few gulps of it herself.
I don’t respond. Instead, I lean a
ll the way back until my head rests against the hard wood. I stare up at the stars, marveling at how clear the sky looks out here. Lily’s hair brushes against my shoulder as she adjusts herself into the same position.
We don’t say anything for a long time, both of us lost in our own thoughts and riding the buzz. The only sound is coming from the cicadas in the trees.
The silence is eventually broken by Lily.
“Aspen?”
I turn my head to face her, newly aware of how close she is lying next to me.
“Hm?” I hum, my eyes raking over her features. I take in the way her dark eyelashes almost touch her brow bone when she looks at me. The way her lips are slightly parted, showing off a sliver of her teeth. The small scar above her eyebrow that she got last summer at the pool when she ran into the side during a game of water basketball.
I soak it all in, until she speaks again, shocking me with her question. “Truth or dare?”
17
Lily
Present
“Why don’t you run inside and get us a table?” Aspen offers, throwing Gladys into park.
We hadn’t been in the car for more than three hours when he started whining of hunger. We spent the better half of the day exploring Hot Springs, not getting on the road until after five at night. I wouldn’t admit this to his face—ever—but I actually enjoyed my day with him. We had fun. Things were easy, and the car ride to wherever we are right now was pretty painless as well.
Dare I say, I’m enjoying his company.
I climb out of the car, grab my purse from the back, and look to Aspen still seated in the driver’s seat. “You aren’t coming in?”
“I have to make a quick phone call, then I’ll be in. I’m also going to look for a nearby place to stay.” He slides his phone from his pocket, wiggling it in the air as proof.
“Gotcha,” I respond, before slamming the door and walking up to the quaint looking restaurant.
It’s made out of simple red brick, tucked deep into small hills off the highway. It looks like at one point there was a sign attached to the top of the building, but the words have long since been faded by the sun. A bell chimes above me as I walk through the front doors.
“Welcome, my name is Ed. How can I help you?” a charming old man says from across the café, hobbling his way over to me with a large grin.
I return his smile. “I just need a table for me and my friend. He’s outside, but he should be in soon.”
“My pleasure, darling.” He grabs two menus, leading me to a small booth in the corner. Tucking both hands into the pants of his trousers, he looks at me. “Now, what can I get you to drink?”
“Two waters, please.” I don’t know if Aspen will want something other than that, so I start there. I begin to look over the menu, assessing my options. My stomach growls impatiently as I try to decide what I might want. A few minutes into looking at the menu, Aspen strides in and slides into the booth across from me. “Have a good phone call?”
“It was actually great, thanks for asking.” His lips pull up in a playful smile.
Then, he reaches across the table and pulls my lip out from between my teeth. I hadn’t realized I was even biting it until he did the familiar gesture.
“I presume this is the friend?” Ed asks, setting down our waters. Once he’s done, he props an elbow over the top of Aspen’s part of the booth, patting Aspen on the shoulder after.
Aspen reaches out his hand and Ed takes it. “Yep, that would be me, Lily’s friend, Aspen.” He enunciates the word friend and winks at me. “I see you’ve already met Lily.”
“Lily,” Ed whispers. “What a beautiful name. Like the flower.”
I can feel the heat rushing to my cheeks and I immediately look down at my menu. I’ve always been pissed at my parents for naming Maverick after a badass movie character and me a delicate flower. Complete bullshit if you ask me.
“What can I get you kids to eat?”
Aspen looks over his menu for a few beats. “I’ll have the cheeseburger, and she’ll have the pancakes. Is there any way you could add chocolate chips to them, sir?”
“Of course. My wife would be happy to do so. I’ll get those right in.” Ed takes both menus from Aspen’s outstretched hand and walks away.
I pin my gaze on Aspen, raising my eyebrows. “What if I didn’t want the pancakes?”
“Please, Lily. You always want pancakes.” He brings his glass of water to his mouth, shaking his head. “Glad to see you’re as hardheaded as always.” His Adam’s apple bobs as he takes a drink.
“Always will be.” I smile at him, leaning back in the booth.
“Good. I wouldn’t want you any other way.” The last part is said quietly. Right after it leaves his mouth, he averts his eyes from mine.
As my mind ponders what he meant by that, I look around the restaurant to discover it’s a lot busier than I imagined it would be. “So, what’s the plan for tonight?” I ask.
“Well, Veronica is—”
“Veronica?” What does Veronica have to do with any of this?
His eyes widen for a split second before he shrugs it off. “I just meant I heard Veronica say there’s no rush for us to get there early. They’re handling things.”
My eyes narrow. He’s not telling me something. “Mmhmmm…” I stare at him inquisitively, trying to figure out what he isn’t telling me.
“So the plan,” Aspen begins, leaning forward and propping his elbows on the table, “is to find somewhere to stay nearby. It looked like there was an Airbnb close by that still had space available. Then we’ll hit the road again tomorrow. I’d love to stop in Nashville next.”
I’m getting ready to respond when a sweet older woman walks our way with two plates. “Pancakes?” she questions.
Aspen points to me at the same time I raise my hand. She sets the pancakes down and the wonderful smell of chocolate and syrup hits my nose.
Setting down the cheeseburger in front of Aspen, she asks if we need anything else before disappearing.
“This smells delicious!” I inhale loudly, wafting in the delicious scent. I drown the pancakes in syrup after spreading butter on top. My stomach grumbles, making me lick my lips in anticipation.
Cutting myself a big bite, I stuff it into my mouth and slowly chew. “Mmmmm, oh my god,” I moan. “These are amazing.” I look at Aspen and find his gaze straight on my mouth.
He clears his throat and picks up a fry, stuffing it into his mouth and chewing aggressively. “Better than Judas’s?”
“It’s close,” I answer through another mouthful.
We eat in silence and I don’t mind it one bit. These pancakes are too delicious to get sidetracked by small talk.
“How’s everything tasting?” the lady who brought us our food asks, now standing in front of us in a pastel apron. She looks like the grandma you’d see in a commercial advertising a baking item. She’s incredibly adorable, and her pancakes are next level.
“These pancakes are to die for!” I say, shoving another large bite into my mouth. My eyes roll back as the mix of deliciousness hits my tongue.
“Well, if you want to come back in two days, we’re running a buy-one-get-one-free on pancakes.”
“Thank you for letting us know. We’re actually only here for the night—on a small road trip before we go to a friend’s event. We’re going to find somewhere to crash tonight, but tomorrow morning, we hit the road again,” Aspen informs her before popping another fry in.
“Oh goody, we can give you lodging for the night!” Her wrinkled hands clap together in excitement. “The city is busier than normal. We have a convention going on. Don’t ask me what it’s about, I wouldn’t have the answer for you. But I can assure you, our local hotel will probably be booked. We normally rent the room to lone travelers through Airbnb, but we’ll give you a discount.”
I look to Aspen to figure out what we should do. I mean, they’re strangers, but very sweet ones. And if the hotel is booked, that do
esn’t give us much more of an option unless we want to keep driving. We communicate silently with each other. It could be a risk to stay with the two of them, but they’re too cute to seem creepy. I could stalk their Airbnb host rating right now to make sure, but I’m sure it’s the same one Aspen just mentioned.
Old people wouldn’t be serial killers, right?
“Yeah, that would be really nice of you guys,” Aspen finally says, and I nod my head to agree with him.
“Wonderful,” Ed says, coming up behind his wife. “We’d love to have some company! We don’t get a lot of it out here.” He pinches his wife’s butt and I can’t help but snicker, especially when she gives him a look that screams don’t you dare.
They’re officially adorable.
“Ed, why don’t you go show them to the house if they’re done eating? I need to get back to cooking.” His wife kisses him on the cheek and starts to walk away. “Oh, and I’m Helen by the way!” she hollers at us as she makes her way across the restaurant.
Aspen pulls out his wallet to pay, but Ed swats his hand and gives him a stern look. Aspen looks at me for help, but I just shrug.
18
Aspen
Past - Age Twenty-One
Lily stares at me expectantly as I consider her proposition.
“Um…truth?”
“Why do you hate me?” The question flies from her mouth so quickly, there’s no doubt in my mind she already had it prepared. She stares back at me, challenging me to answer.
A long exhale escapes me. “I don’t hate you, Lily.” As I say it, I look into her eyes, trying to convey that if she should ever believe me, now would be the time. I bullshit around with her a lot. It’s my defense mechanism. It feels safe to mess with her—a distraction from how desperately I want her.
The Road to Finding Us: A Standalone Second Chance Romance (Aftershock Series Book 2) Page 9
