by Alice Raine
‘OK, Nathan, you know where we are if you need us. Goodbye.’ As rude as it was, I didn’t even return her goodbye, instead simply hanging up and immediately returning to the job of wiping Stella’s brow. Frowning, I once again noticed the dark sweat patches on her T-shirt and decided I really needed to get her out of her wet clothing.
Pushing my hair from my face I pursed my lips thoughtfully. These last few hours had really brought it home to me just how important this woman was to me, because as impossible as it seemed, I could barely consider the thought of leaving her side for even the briefest of moments. Shaking my head I smiled. My brother would love to see me like this – I’d never hear the end of it. As reluctant as I was to leave her, I eventually dragged myself to the drawers in Stella’s room and dug around until I discovered clean bed sheets and a large T-shirt which would have to do as replacement pyjamas for now.
The job of shifting Stella so I could change the bed turned out to be much trickier than I’d first expected. Stella didn’t have an armchair or sofa in her room that I could temporarily move her to, and there was no fucking way I was laying her on the floor, so I’d had to try and change the sheets with her still in the bed. With much manoeuvring of Stella’s limp, damp body the clean sheets were finally on and I was halfway through peeling Stella’s sodden T-shirt off when I heard the front door to her flat slam shut.
‘Stella? You home? The door was unlocked so I’m guessing you are, sweetie …’ Scowling at the loud noise I realised it was Stella’s housemate Kenny out in the hall making the racket, but luckily his banging hadn’t woken Stella. Ignoring his calls, I concentrated on my task of pulling her arms through the sleeves to release her body from the sweat-soaked garment, and had just succeeded in getting it over her head when the bedroom door suddenly burst open. Acting on pure impulse I spat out a curse and launched myself at the bed to cover Stella’s exposed body, my forearm wrapping around her breasts and my other hand supporting her lolling head. The fact that Kenny was gay was totally irrelevant to me; nobody, nobody at all, was seeing my Stella naked.
Flashing a glare at the door I saw Kenny frozen to the spot and wide eyed, ‘Oops, sorry to interrupt …’ he said with a blush fast rising under his goatee and up into his cheeks. Quite apparently he thought he’d disturbed something sexual, but as he began to hurriedly spin away he must have seen Stella’s deathly pale complexion because he paused, frowned, and turned curious eyes on me.
‘Haven’t you heard of fucking knocking?’ I growled as I finally succeeded in dragging the sheet up over Stella’s bare chest and throwing her soaked T-shirt to the floor.
‘Sorry … I didn’t know you’d be here,’ As he began taking a few steps closer I once again felt a warning growl rising in my throat and my fists actually tightened by my sides. I literally had no control over these reactions. Fuck, it really was crazy how bloody protective I felt over this woman. Talk about primal instincts flooding to the surface.
Hearing my warning Kenny stopped dead and flashed me another nervous glance from a safe distance away. Sensible lad. ‘Uh … she looks awful, what’s the matter with her?’
Shrugging helplessly I turned back to Stella and chewed on my sore lower lip before bending to gently brush some stray hairs from her sweaty brow. ‘A bad flu I guess, it just came on suddenly about three hours ago, I’ve called my doctor and he’s on his way.’
‘Do you need any help?’ Kenny asked carefully. His tone was respectful, but he was giving a pointed glance to the clean T-shirt in my hand that I had been about to dress Stella in. Feeling my eyebrows lower and furrow, my jaw tensed at the idea of him seeing her undressed and I found myself adamantly shaking my head. ‘No. I’ll take care of her,’ I muttered in a low tone turning to face him fully and probably sending a death glare his way if his shaky backward step was anything to go by.
Tugging nervously on his goatee Kenny seemed to be considering making a run for it when he suddenly straightened his back and looked me straight in the eye with more courage than I’d ever thought he possessed. ‘I love her just as much as you, Nathan,’ he said quietly and in response my entire body seemed to tense unpleasantly as the image of punching him sprang to my mind, ‘just in a different way,’ he added quickly.
Forcing myself to acknowledge his words I pushed a breath from my lungs in an attempt at calming myself down. I hadn’t even had the balls to sit down and really work out if I was capable of real love yet, let alone vocalise any such emotion to Stella. I was pretty sure I did love her – that must be what these overwhelming feelings of care, protection, affection, and desire inside me meant, but I was actually quite jealous of how Kenny could just stand there and say it like it was the easiest thing on earth. Sucking in a deep breath I glanced at Stella again and felt my heart melt and a smile tug my lips. Being with her was the easiest thing on earth. Talk about an enlightening few hours – I felt like I’d been on a voyage of self-discovery and finally emerged into the clarity of daylight. Except it was Stella that was my blinding light.
I let my gaze wander over her again before nodding decisively; once she was better I’d sort myself and my tangled feelings out and then talk to her, but for now it was obvious that I was getting worked up and predatory for no reason. Kenny was right, he was Stella’s best friend and definitely not a threat to my relationship with her in any way, shape, or form.
Ramming my hands into my trouser pockets I dipped my head.
‘Sorry.’ My apology was difficult for me to say, feeling like sawdust in my throat and came out quietly, possibly too quiet for him to hear. ‘I’m just worried about her. Is there any chance you have some soup in the flat for her when she wakes up? She’s sweating so much that she’s bound to be dehydrated.’
Looking pleased to have a job to do Kenny grinned at me and visibly perked up. ‘We haven’t, but I’ve got lots of fresh veggies in the fridge and I’m a whizz in the kitchen, I’ll make a homemade broth, it won’t take too long.’ Springing into action Kenny swung away with purpose and left the room so I could turn my attention back to Stella.
The next few hours felt like torture. I hated seeing Stella sick with me being helpless to do anything, but at least on the positive side her fever seemed to be reducing slightly. She came in and out of consciousness several times, always drowsy and confused, but she did at least manage to eat a little of the soup that Kenny prepared, and occasionally murmured things to me that were sometimes lucid, and sometimes utter nonsense.
At about seven o’clock Kenny knocked on the bedroom door before poking his head around. ‘If you need to leave I can look after her, Nathan.’
Shaking my head firmly I looked between him and Stella. ‘No. I’ll take care of her,’ I stated, my cool tone leaving no room for discussion. My girl, my responsibility.
‘What about work?’ Kenny questioned cautiously, mirroring my own thoughts. I had no intention of leaving Stella while she was sick, but I did have a couple of important deals happening next week which I needed to contribute to. Unfortunately it was work that I couldn’t do from Stella’s laptop because I needed the programs on my home computer and access to my office network.
I absently stroked my fingers across the palm of Stella’s hand and felt a small smile tug at the corner of my mouth from just how much I cared for this woman. Loved. How much I loved this woman. There – I’d finally admitted it, if only in my head. Turning to Kenny I saw he’d watched my affectionate moment and was smiling goofily at me as if I were starring in some crappy rom-com. Glaring at him he soon wiped the smile from his face and disappeared after telling me he would be in his room if I needed him.
Turning back to Stella I sighed as I considered my options. ‘This would be so much easier if we lived together,’ I said out loud, my voice causing her to shift and blink a few times still half asleep. ‘Move in with me, baby,’ I murmured softly, the thoughts from my head just spilling out before I could stop them.
Thrashing her arms slightly, her eyelids fluttered brief
ly. ‘Nope,’ she murmured thickly, and I rolled my eyes. She was still bloody stubborn even when delirious, ill, and half asleep. Watching every tiny movement of her face in fascination I immediately noticed when a crease appeared between her eyebrows as a small frown took shape. ‘Other women,’ she mumbled on an expelled breath.
Shifting myself closer to her I frowned. Other women? What on earth did she mean? Our conversation about my previous subs came back to me and my frown became a full-on grimace. She must be referring to her dislike of my apartment and the fact that she associated it with them – my ‘other women’. I sighed heavily. At least I hoped that’s what she meant, I certainly wasn’t seeing any other women and I had absolutely no intention of it either. Stella was it for me. Surely she knew that? Didn’t she? ‘There are no other women, Stella,’ I softly reassured her, stroking her clammy face again. ‘Only you, baby. Just you.’ Not even sure if she was conscious at the moment or not, I left it at that and dropped a kiss onto her brow.
When my phone rang a few minutes later – and it definitely was my phone this time – I was still distracted by my concerns about Stella’s health and her possible misunderstanding of my commitment to her, but when I saw my brother’s name I tried to push my worries away for now and took the call.
‘Nicholas, hi.’ Good, my voice sounded normal and gave away no clue that I’d just spent the majority of the last four hours fretting and acting like a pathetic baby all because Stella was ill with the flu.
‘Hello, brother. Rebecca mentioned that Stella was unwell. How is she now?’
Looking at her sleeping peacefully I felt a little happier than I had a few hours ago and found myself nodding even though he wouldn’t be able to see it. ‘A little better, I think. She’s more peaceful now, but still has a fever.’
‘There’s a horrible flu bug going around, it sounds like she might have that.’ There was a pause on the end of the line, but somehow I just knew he had something else to say to me. ‘Rebecca also mentioned that you sounded a little … tense. Everything OK now?’
Keeping the phone to my ear I tipped my head back and felt my nostrils flare as I drew in a long, deep breath to maintain my composure. I knew Nicholas was just checking up on me because he cared, but in my aggravated state it just riled me and made me think he lacked confidence in my ability to control my anger. I grimaced as I begrudgingly realised that I often did. My free hand came up and scrubbed across my face to try and rub away the tension of the last few hours before raking it through my hair and finally coming to rest on my neck as I continued to stare at the ceiling. ‘I’m fine.’ Regardless of my previous deep breathing I still sounded terse, so with a huge amount of effort I performed a silent countdown and forced myself to relax.
‘My apologies, Nicholas. Seeing Stella so sick has been quite trying. I’m sure she’ll be better soon though, plus the doctor is coming soon.’ ‘Quite trying’ – talk about an understatement. The last few hours had been hideous. Not to mention a complete eye-opener with regards to acknowledging the depth and gravity of my feelings for Stella. Shaking my head I sat on the edge of the bed. I loved my brother, but I wasn’t going to have that conversation with him. Clearing my throat to ease my discomfort I changed the subject, ‘I heard from Rebecca that you have the wedding venue confirmed. Congratulations.’
I heard a soft chuckle down the line, ‘Thanks, brother. Yes, we’ve just arrived home now. Rebecca loved the hotel so it all worked out really well. We’ll have to meet up soon and I’ll tell you all about it.’
‘Sounds good,’ I agreed, not entirely happy with the idea of getting too soppy discussing wedding venues.
‘Actually, thinking about it, Rebecca is going to be away for a conference soon, maybe you and I could get together then? I’ll just need to confirm the dates with her,’ Nicholas suggested.
‘Sounds good, we could meet for a meal or drinks. Perhaps that Italian place you love so much?’ I suggested, thinking that being out and about would limit the possibilities for too much wedding talk.
‘Perfect, I’ll drop you a text with a date. Well, I’ll let you get back to Stella. Call me if you need anything, Nathan.’ With that my brother hung up, leaving me to fuss over Stella some more. After checking her temperature again and finding that it was still too high I called my personal doctor again and arranged – demanded – for him to bring forwards her appointment and meet me at my apartment in an hour. Then I placed a call to my driver before finally packing some of Stella’s clothes into a case. Stella might not want to move in with me, but this situation left me little choice. If I moved her temporarily to my apartment I could continue to care for her and access my computer to do the work I needed, thus solving both my issues in one go.
As I anticipated, Kenny wasn’t too keen on my plan, but after I gave him Stella’s key to my apartment and told him he could come over at any point to check on her he gave in and offered to shift her case for me. With Kenny’s assistance, I bundled Stella into a blanket, scooped her limp body up into my arms, and carried her down to the car where Ryan was waiting for us.
I was mid-way through trying to untangle Stella’s arms from around my neck so I could fasten her in when her little hands clutched at my neck and she murmured against my cheek, ‘Nathan … don’t let me go.’ My heart constricted at just how much her words meant to me. I was never letting her go, and I dropped a long, possessive kiss on the top of her head as I climbed into the car and settled Stella in my lap. ‘Never,’ I murmured. If Stella wanted me to hold her, then fuck it, I would – seatbelt rules would have to be broken this time.
Six –Stella
Hmm … I was so comfortable. My bed was cosy and warm and just utterly lovely. Rolling over I sunk deeper into the mattress before it occurred to me just how very deep and squishy the bed was. Too squishy. My bed had a firm mattress, but this was positively sumptuous. Stretching out, my feet hit against something firm and cool, causing me to frown as I reluctantly began to peel my eyes open.
Books, shelves, and some very fancy framed certificates filled my bleary view. OK, so from that view I knew this definitely wasn’t my bedroom, and from the confusing images before me it wasn’t Nathan’s bed either – although the covers did seem to hold a hint of his lovely aftershave scent. Where the heck was I? Feeling distinctly unnerved I shoved the thick duvet away and began to push myself upright. Coming to my senses properly I realised that I could hear voices behind me and I swivelled round to see Nathan sat at his desk with a bank of monitors in front of him. I was in his office? Utterly confused I blinked several times as I gazed around and realised I was swaddled up in amongst a mountain of duvets and pillows on the sofa in Nathan’s home office. What the heck? Why was I in a makeshift bed at Nathan’s place?
Just then several voices came from the screens on his desk, drawing my eyes back to him as I realised that Nathan must be on some sort of video conference call. Thank goodness the monitors were facing away from me, imagine the sight the businessmen would get otherwise – me popping up behind him tucked into bed! Regardless of the call he was on, I saw Nathan catch sight of my movement and turn his eyes to me. A small smile curved his lips and his eyes darkened and glimmered a silent ‘hello’ at me as our gazes met, sending a thrill rushing through my newly awakened body.
‘Gentlemen, just give me one moment please,’ Nathan murmured to the screens, his eyes still on mine, before he pressed a couple of keys on his computer and stood up. Walking directly to me Nathan crouched down beside me and smiled so sweetly that my heart squeezed tight in my chest. ‘Hey, sweetheart,’ he murmured as he leant forwards and placed a kiss on my forehead. ‘God, it’s good to see you awake and looking better.’
His lips felt cool against my heated skin, but so good, and unconsciously I found myself leaning into his touch, which brought a chuckle from Nathan’s lips and caused him to pull me into a warm embrace. ‘Why am I in your office?’ I asked, as I snuggled closer to his firm chest and Nathan’s lovely unique scent that
I so adored.
‘You’ve been ill.’ Smoothing some hair from my face with gentle fingers he leaned back to gaze down at me with his crystal blues. ‘Let me just wrap up this call and you can have my undivided attention.’ Placing another kiss on my head Nathan stood up and towered over me. He didn’t move away immediately, instead choosing to stand there with his legs spread and hand in his pockets as he simply stared down at me for a second or two, before finally blinking and retaking his place at the desk. Clicking a few buttons I saw the screens flash to life as Nathan got back to work. Sitting up, I rubbed my hands over my face, ran my fingers through my tangled hair to smooth it, and then sifted through my mind trying to recollect any memories of being ill. As my sleep fogged brain began to clear I recalled the car ride home from London with Nathan and then waking up in my flat feeling hot, achy, and very tired, but apart from that not else much came to me apart from glimpses of memories about soup and strange conversations which for all I knew might well have been dreams.
In the few minutes it took Nathan to finish his call I took the opportunity to discreetly watch him in action. I’d never really seen him conducting his business, certainly not for this length of time anyway. It was fascinating to see his work demeanour fall into place as he fluidly took control of the meeting; finalising some key issues, delegating a number of tasks, and then smoothly drawing it to a conclusion. He really was the ultimate professional. As he closed off all the monitors and turned his heated stare onto me I shuddered as unexpected lust rushed through my body and I swiftly revised my thought – forget ultimate professional, he was the ultimate temptation. With the way my body was suddenly thrumming it was clear that illness or not, his commanding business demeanour was a huge turn-on for me. Mind you, seeing as I loved him when he was in full domination mode it was hardly surprising that seeing him commanding other people turned me on too. When Nathan pierced me with a look as loaded as the one currently aimed at me I could barely maintain normal breathing, let alone any other human functions, and I hastily licked my dry lips in anticipation.
