by Heather Karn
“You are ineligible. She cannot choose you.”
“She has chosen me, and I accept.”
My heart swelled at his words. Resting my head against the soft part of his shoulder, I leaned into him and wrapped an arm around his waist, holding him to me. I’d never let anyone take him away from me again.
The woman standing beside Kitta cleared her throat, drawing Argnot’s attention. “Might we continue the Courtship as this young lady would like a chance to meet the suitors for her second round. Obviously, we’ll have to deal with this issue later, but let’s continue.”
I leaned away from Ki and grinned, taking his hand. “Good. Then, if you’ll excuse us, I need to talk to him in private.”
Argnot started sputtering again, but the woman spoke over him, ignoring us as she started calling out the names of the men who should remain. Her voice drowned out the moment my bedroom door slid closed behind us. I released Ki’s hand and took another few steps into the room before turning around to face Kilani, who was studying me with his blank expression.
“So, how much trouble are we in?”
Ki shrugged, walking toward me and resting his hands on my waist. “I don’t care. You are mine. You chose me, and no one can take you from me. I won’t let them.”
“I like the sound of that.” As I stared at him, the same anxiety I’d had coursing through my body earlier returned, and I stepped closer, burying my face in his chest as I gripped his shirt in my hands. “Kitta told me about your punishment, but I held out hope until the end that you’d still be among the men. When you weren’t...I couldn’t choose any of them, Ki.”
“Why not? They’re good men.” While he spoke, Ki rubbed circles against my back, soothing me.
“Because they weren’t you. And not one of them would even shake my hand. How can I be with someone who’s so afraid of touching me that I’d live the rest of my life in apprehension knowing that someday I’d touch them in public and they’d freak out?”
He tucked my head under his chin. “You can’t live like that. No one should expect you to. I’m so sorry I wasn’t here for you then.”
“It’s okay. You came.”
“I will always come for you, Cammie. And I didn’t just come because of that promise. I came because I love you too, and deep down I hoped you’d feel the same, enough to choose me anyway. I guess you do.”
“I do, Ki. I’ve known I love you for a while now, but I was too afraid to admit it. I’m still afraid, but at least now you’ll be there with me.”
His arms wrapped around me, holding me as close as was possible. “I know you worry about your freedom and having to live a life you don’t want, but I promise to never constrict your freedom in any way. I only wish to protect you and see you happy.”
“I’d like it if you were part of that happiness,” I murmured, nuzzling my cheek against his shirt, causing a chuckle to rise from his chest.
“I’d like that very much as well.” Slight tension oozed from him and his voice was tighter when he spoke again, like he was uncertain of my reaction. “I’d also like to continue what we started before. I never knew touch like that could feel so...pleasurable? Is that a word in your language?”
I grinned up at him, watching the play of emotions across his face. “Are you asking me to touch you again?”
“Yes, please.”
Lifting a hand, I cupped his cheek and my heart skipped and swelled when he closed his eyes and leaned into my touch. Not long ago, this man hadn’t approved of any touch at all, and certainly hadn’t been comfortable with the idea. Now he was relishing my touch, and asking for it, needing it. He turned his head and brushed his lips against the inside of my wrist, his whiskers tickling my skin, making my heart melt into a pile of goo on the floor.
When he took my hand and started kissing his way up my arm, I was sure my body was going to explode with the heat racing through my bloodstream. Reaching my shirt sleeve, Ki moved to my neck, and I tipped my head to give him better access. I was so lost in his touch I barely noticed his strong hands resting on my hips except that the heat they exuded amped up the temperature my body was already experiencing. There was no doubt as his tongue danced along my skin and his teeth nipped at me that in minutes, I wasn’t going to be able to stand on my watery legs.
My hands moved of their own free will, one running across the coarse hair at the back of his head and the other running across the large muscles of his bicep. A pitiful pleading sound escaped me when Ki’s mouth left my skin, but I swallowed it when his lips crashed against mine in a kiss that would’ve made Argnot pass out or have a heart attack.
Kilani was in complete control. I followed his lead, opening my mouth when his tongue demanded it. The raging passion that had fueled his kisses slowed to a sensual dance as his tongue stroked against mine. My body was forgetting how to breathe as my hand moved from his hair up into the fur surrounding his ear.
I ran a finger along Kilani’s ear. He moaned and pulled back to rest his forehead against mine, both of us panting. “You shouldn’t do that, not here.”
“Why not?” I asked, enjoying that I could make him react like this.
“Because, there are still people out there, and…” He hesitated, his voice growing unsure. “And I know this is your room, your safe space, but...where this leads...I was hoping we could be together like that for the first time in my home, our home.”
His words stunned me, and I took a step back. Sure enough, he was right. Our kissing and touching were definitely leading toward bigger and better things, but was I ready for that? I certainly hadn’t asked for any of this, or for a husband. I’d practically been forced to choose someone when I would’ve waited longer, though Kilani would always be my choice.
Ki stiffened. “I said something wrong, didn’t I? Is it because you’ll be moving in with me or our mating?”
Taking a deep breath, I covered my nose and mouth with my hands and sat on the bed. He just had to use the word mating. Was I even ready for that? Physically, yes. Emotionally? Closing my eyes, I took another deep breath as Spock hopped onto my lap and the bed dipped beside me.
“Talk to me, Cammie. I can’t fix what I did if I don’t know what I did. I want to see you happy, not like this.”
“I’m not sure I’m ready for the mating.” My voice was muffled through my hands, and I didn’t dare peek at his reaction.
A few seconds of silence almost broke my resolve to keep from looking in his direction for any sign of what he was thinking. Those seconds were longer than eternity.
“I see,” he finally stated, slight disappointment ringing in his voice. “If you aren’t ready, then I will wait until you are. Right now, I may not hold any honor or respect among my people, but I wish to be an honorable mate for you, so I will wait until you tell me that you are ready.”
Soft, furry fingers stroked up and down the back of my hands until I peeked at Ki through slitted eyelids. He smiled softly at me, a reassuring smile that had me dropping my hands to my lap. I could trust him. He’d proven it time and time again.
Sliding closer, I rested my head on his shoulder. “I trust you, Ki.”
“I know.”
“So, what happens now?”
“Now, we pack the belongings you wish to keep with you, and we move you into my home. I have to warn you, I don’t have virtual technology in my home, so this may be the last time you can change a room to look like this. I’m no longer a Captain, so having a room on my ship like this won’t be possible.”
I lifted my head and stared around. The fact that one day I’d lose the chance to see my Earth room ever again hadn’t crossed my mind. Now that it did, my heart wasn’t sure how to handle it as my chest and lungs constricted, making it hard to breathe. How would I choose what to take and what to leave?
Ki rested his forehead against the side of my head and wrapped an arm around my shoulders, his voice barely a whisper. “I see what this is doing to you, how much you miss your home. Cammie, y
ou should hate me for this, for bringing you here against your will. I’ll never understand how you could love me instead.”
And that was what was going to get me through this. Ki. Soon I’d fall apart, and he’d be there to catch me and put me back together when I did. I didn’t need him to; I was strong, but I wanted him to be there to do it, to remind me I wasn’t alone, and someone cared about my traditions and culture, and me.
“Can you help me pack?” I asked him, turning my head so he had to lift his to look at me.
“Of course.”
Lifting one side of my mouth in a sly grin that raised my spirits, I squeezed his thigh. “I’m bringing those really short exercise shorts with me.”
Heat flooded his gaze. “As long as I’m the only person who sees you in them.”
“I make no promises.”
We took the next ten minutes to pack a new duffle bag of clothes, and to repack the old one, squeezing as many of my belongings into both as we could. No one disturbed our work, and I was almost afraid to ask if Ki thought they were still out there. Considering that Kitta could now speak to the men for as long as she needed, I was certain people were still out there. However, it didn’t matter. I’d made my choice, and I was proud of that choice.
As we moved toward the door, both of us with a duffle bag, the comm unit went off.
“Kilani, I wish to enter.” The woman’s tone was gruff and she was definitely angry.
“My mother,” Ki whispered, stepping forward to open the door.
Crap. This was not how I wanted to meet my new mother-in-law. I certainly didn’t want her angry with me over choosing her son. Then again, I was still pretty ticked off that they all made a huge, life-altering decision based on what they thought I wanted without even discussing it with me. That was not acceptable, and I was willing to tell her all about it.
The door slid open and the woman standing outside the door was a mirror image of Kitta, though an older version. While they all had the same fur and ears, their facial features and structure were as unique as a human’s would be. Kitta had inherited her mother’s small mouth and button nose, where Ki’s facial features had to come from his father.
“Please come in,” Ki murmured, ushering the woman inside.
She wasted no time in doing so, and once the door was closed, she turned on him. “What are you doing here? What are you even thinking? You’re already in enough trouble and you want to add more to it? Haven’t you humiliated the family enough for one day? Can’t you at least give us a week before doing something equally as stupid?” Ki opened his mouth to speak, but she held up her hand, silencing him. “Not one word until we’re out of here.”
“Then I will,” I cut in, drawing her attention to me. “Ki’s taking me home. I’m hungry, tired, and becoming crankier by the minute. All I want is some peace and quiet and a minute where no one expects anything from me and no one makes decisions that affect me without my opinion on it. So, excuse us. Ki, please take me home.” I was begging, no pleading, with both my voice and my eyes. There was no way I could do this right now.
Ki reached for the rectangle that would open the door, but his mother stopped him by gripping his wrist tight, a testament to how upset she was in that moment. “I am here representing the council.”
“Cammie has chosen,” he growled back, keeping his voice low.
“You were not an option.”
I dropped the duffle bag I held, making Spock squeak as he wasn’t expecting it. “He only wasn’t an option because y’all assumed I hated him. Well, I don’t. I love him and can someone please listen to me when I say that? I. Love. Him.” I accentuated every single word so there was no way she could misunderstand.
Roosha’s mouth popped open as she stared at me. Sure, I’d chosen him, but had she not believed I’d chosen him out of love? Or was it my tone and the way I spoke to her that had her speechless? Either way, I wasn’t sure I’d like how this would end, so, with a sigh, I picked up my bag and spoke again, this time calmer.
“Listen, I don’t mean to be rude, but like I said, I’m hungry and tired, so I’m cranky. Can we please discuss this later, and somewhere more private than this? And do so calmly?”
“This isn’t a matter that can wait. The council-.”
“Keeps messing up my life.” I was so done. I strode over to Kilani and took his hand in mine, giving it a squeeze. “If I don’t leave now, I’m going to start crying, and I really don’t feel like crying in front of anyone today. It’s been a terrible two days and I just want to bury myself under a blanket and pretend that nothing exists right now.”
A disgruntled sigh escaped Roosha, and the rage burning inside of her fell away to reveal deep lines creasing her brow and tired wrinkles at the corners of her eyes. “I’m sorry, but I can’t let the two of you be together until the council has met and discussed this. I was hoping to be able to speak with both of you about what happened so I could present it to them-.”
“Like you presented what happened on my ship?” Ki spat, tightening his hold on my hand. “You were the one to voice the vote that took my ship.”
My eyes widened as she argued back. “But not your Mate Level.”
“I don’t care. You’re my mother.”
“I’m also a council member and must do what needs to be done.”
Ki shook his head, his eyes filled with disappointment. “That doesn’t mean you have to be the voice to my doom.” He looked away from her, eyes glistening as he tried to stop his own tears from falling. “You were all so beyond reason and listening. How can you say you represent the people when you don’t even listen to what anyone has to say?”
“We do.”
“Then why aren’t you listening to Cammie? Have any of you even spoken with her about what happened?”
That shut Roosha down quick, and her eyes flicked to me before returning to him. The silence was enough of an answer for all of us. They couldn’t very well represent me if they hadn’t spoken to me or listened to what I was saying now in this moment.
“In case you aren’t aware, which I am sure you are, but just in case,” Kilani stated when his mother didn’t respond to him, “Cammie needs fed every few hours, and she sleeps every day for up to five or six of our hours. This has been a long day for her, and I’m sure the council can give her time to settle into this new life before they decide they want to try and control her again. As for me, I will take whatever punishment they give me for showing up here today, but I will not give up Cammie. I will fight the council for my right to be chosen.”
Roosha raised a hand to pinch the bridge of her nose. “Why must you be so much like your father?”
I arched an eyebrow at Ki, who shrugged. “He’s as stubborn and opinionated as I am.” That made sense, so I gave him a deep nod to show I understood as Roosha continued.
“I’ll delay the council’s meeting-.”
“Can you just tell them to drop it?” I interjected. “I’m not choosing anyone else. Where I come from, we don’t make people choose someone to marry from thirty people. Fertile, non-fertile, it doesn’t matter. You marry who you love, and I love Ki. Sure, Saren kidnapped me,” I made it a special point to glare at her while I said it so she’d get the point, “and Ki wouldn’t turn the ship around once they found out I was a female, but no one’s bothered to ask me how I feel. Well, I’ll tell you. I’m better off here than I was there, though I wish my mother was with me. I’m safer here.” I shivered, thinking about my father and how his prison sentence was almost over. “Though I fought Kilani at first, once I had time to think about it and process what was happening, I realized Ki did me a huge favor by not taking me back. So, please don’t punish him for that, and please don’t punish me by taking him away from me. If you do, I promise to make your lives a living nightmare, and nothing you can do in retaliation will come close to what’s already happened to me.”
Another sigh escaped her, and Roosha jerked her head toward the door. “Get out of here. I’ll
speak with the council. At best they won’t file an inquisition for what happened today. At worst I’ll buy you some time to rest and recover before they meet.”
“Thank you,” I murmured, and she bowed her head at me, but her eyes were on Kilani. He ignored her, opening the door to leave. Before he towed me out of the room after him, I caught a glimpse of pain in Roosha’s eyes. There was no doubt she loved her son, but she’d let her emotions get the best of her and made some choices that had damaged their relationship, and one that I might have with her as my mother-in-law.
Ki led me downstairs to the ground floor. We passed several people, and their eyes all widened as we nearly fled by them. At first I thought it was because of our speed and almost bowling a few over, but then I realized we were still holding hands. This no touching rule was going to continue to get me in trouble.
However, when we reached the outdoors, Ki stopped us and turned to me, giving my hand a light squeeze. “I don’t mean to come off as rude…”
“But you need to let my hand go.”
He released my hand and nodded. “Yes. It would be best for now if we returned to what is customary among my people. We already have too much aggression aimed at us, though mostly me, and I don’t think it would do well for us to draw more unwanted attention. I don’t mean to be rude.”
I shrugged. “No, it’s okay. I’ve understood it would be like this since you explained the no touching rule. I’ll just keep apologizing if instinct dictates that I grab you.”
Kilani grinned and shook his head, leading me down another path than the one I’d used to get here. I wasn’t sure how I remembered which path that was, but somehow, I did. The sun was growing closer to the horizon, but there was still plenty of light for me to see the trail and the trees around us. Ki was back to his rapid pace, so I didn’t have much time to look around, but all the vegetation I saw was definitely tropical. When I wasn’t looking at the plants, or trying to see the animals I heard but couldn’t find, I was staring at the people we passed on our way to Ki’s house. They each stared at me with curious expressions, and some little kids pointed at me. Some comments about my clothes were loud enough to reach my ear, a few making Ki growl under his breath.
