by Jackie D
Frank turned in her direction, forcing Lucy’s body around with him. “Don’t you feel foolish? If you had been any smarter, you could have prevented their deaths. They all cried out for someone to save them, but you were too late.”
“You aren’t going to hurt anyone ever again, Wilds.”
Frank took three steps back, dragging Lucy with him. Lucy could feel her heart in her throat. Her brain was rapidly trying to assess the situation, attempting to play out each scenario. But did people get to cheat death twice? Was she going to get another chance? She watched Erica’s sharp eyes, but they weren’t focused on Wilds, they were focused on her.
There’s so much I haven’t said. So much she needs to know. “I’m sorry I got mad and got out of the car. I’m sorry I didn’t call when your grandpa died. I’m sorry I stayed away for so long.”
Frank pulled her closer. “Shut the fuck up.”
But she wasn’t going to shut up. She had stayed quiet for too long, and now, with death pressing against her head, she couldn’t leave anything unsaid. “But mostly, I’m sorry for not spending every day of the last twelve years telling you just how much I love you. Because I do, and I always have. You always have been, and still are, the only one for me, Chance.”
Frank pulled her head backward and put his mouth against her so she could feel the wetness of his mouth, his spit on the inside of her ear. “I told you to shut the fuck up.”
His need to control the situation, his need to exude his power, was his downfall. While he was focused on Lucy, Erica darted along the other side of him. Now, with Stein on one side and Erica on the other, he looked back and forth frantically.
“It’s over, Frank,” Stein said from the right.
“It’s over when I say it’s over.” He pointed his gun in Stein’s direction and a loud blast came from the left.
The blast shook the small space that had suddenly become the size of a closet. Lucy couldn’t hear anything, the sound of the gunshot filling her ears. She jerked forward out of his grip and stumbled to Jessica, who fell against her, sobbing. Frank fell to his knees and a large red star grew on his right shoulder. He lifted his right hand again, but Erica was already on top of him. She kicked the gun away and shoved him to the ground. She put her knee in the middle of his back and put handcuffs on him. She had wanted to kill him. She had wanted to enact retribution on him for everything he had done and had wanted to do. But he had used Lucy as cover and she couldn’t get the clear kill shot without putting her in danger. It wasn’t a risk she was willing to take.
Frank struggled underneath her. “You two bitches are going to wish you killed me. This isn’t over.”
Stein rushed over to Jessica, helping her to her feet. Lucy backed away, still off kilter from the gunshot and her declaration to Erica. She felt dizzy, and she could smell the desert heat and metallic scent of bombs and bullets. She was about ready to slump to the ground when she felt a hand on her back. It had to be Erica’s hand. She turned into her, allowing her stress and fear to pour out of her in the form of tears against her shoulder. She wasn’t sure how Erica felt about what she had said, but she didn’t care. She needed Erica to hold her.
The police were there within minutes, and as they descended the stairs, her brother practically tackled her, pulling her away from Erica’s embrace.
“Thank God you’re okay.” His arms were like vice grips around her body. She hugged him back, appreciating his presence but wanting to be back with Erica. “You need to be checked out by the paramedics.”
Lucy automatically answered. “I’m fine.”
He put his arm around her, walking her toward the stairs. “Humor me so I can tell Mom you got medical attention.”
The sunshine was a renewing force on her face, warming away the cold, damp space she’d been held in. She sat next to Jessica in the back of an ambulance. EMTs were swarming all around them. There were lights in her eyes, a blood pressure band around her arm. She was aware of them around her, but she couldn’t take her eyes off Erica. She needed to talk to her; she needed to be near her. She was about to push all of the EMTs out of the way and go to her when Jessica held her hand.
Lucy looked at the hand on top of hers. Fingernails covered in dirt that Jessica would probably spend the next several months scrubbing, thinking that remnants were still there, even if she couldn’t see them.
“Thank you for everything, Lucy.”
“I’ll give you my number, if you ever need to talk.”
“I take it that’s your Zack?” She looked over at Erica.
“Yeah, that’s my Zack.”
Jessica smiled and was about to say something else when two sets of arms wrapped around her. Lucy could only assume they were her parents by the way they cried, overjoyed with happiness.
Lucy backed away from the family only to be trampled by her own. The sensation was overwhelming. Her parents, whom she assumed didn’t realize anything had happened until several hours ago, were showering her with kisses and tears.
Her mom grabbed her face, kissing her again. “I’m never letting you out of my sight, ever again.”
“I’m okay, Mom.” She wanted to reassure her mom that she was okay, but she was enjoying the closeness all the same. She hadn’t realized how badly she needed the familiar comfort until now.
* * *
Erica stood off to the side of the car, watching Frank Wilds be shoved into the backseat. Stein stood next to her, arms crossed, smiling. He was trying to yell something from the backseat, and Stein put her hand up to her ear, pointing like she couldn’t hear him. She even gave a little wave as the car pulled away.
The chief walked over and put a hand on her shoulder. “Nice work, you two.”
“Thanks, Chief,” they said in unison.
Erica looked over at Lucy, who was being smothered by her family.
Stein bumped her. “That was quite the confession down there.”
Erica nodded, knowing she was talking about Lucy, not Wilds. “Yeah.”
“You don’t sound too excited. I kind of figured that was exactly what you had wanted to hear.”
Erica continued to watch Lucy talk to her family. “I’ve waited years to hear everything she said down there. I think I’m just now starting to process it. There were a lot of things happening all at once.”
Stein grinned. “And you always talk about what a great multitasker you are.” She rolled her eyes. “So, what are you going to do about it now?”
Erica took a deep breath, still trying to take in the gravity of how quickly her life had just changed. “I’m going to talk to her about it.”
“Well, that’s boring. I was hoping for something a bit saucier.”
“I live to keep you on your toes.”
Stein chuckled and started toward the police cruiser. “Let’s get all this crappy paperwork out of the way so you can go get your girl.”
Diego approached her, a smile stretching from ear to ear. “We’re going to take her home. Come over for a BBQ?”
Erica answered without thinking. “Sounds good.”
She watched as he quickly made his way back over to his family. She wanted to follow him. She wanted to pull Lucy aside and talk to her then and there. She wanted to tell her how she felt, and how she’d heard every word she said. But that would have to wait. Erica needed to wrap up the paperwork for this case, and she wanted to talk to Lucy alone. She wanted to hear her say the things she’d said once more, but this time without a gun to her head. She wanted to hold her without anyone waiting for attention. She wanted…time.
Chapter Thirty-three
Lucy dabbed her temple with a bag of peas her mother had given her. She pulled the towel tighter around her body and stared in the mirror. There were no visible marks this time, no scars, no blood, but the emotional ones would remain long after today.
Grayson came in and flopped down on the bed, Holly right behind. “I want to ask you like a million questions, but Diego said not to push you. So I’m
just going to sit here patiently until you’re ready to talk to me.”
“You may be waiting a while.”
“Seriously, if you need to talk, I’m here.”
Lucy didn’t want to talk, not about what had happened, not about how she felt. She sat on the bed and ran her hand over Holly’s face. “I think we need to head home tomorrow.”
“What?” He sat up immediately.
“I have a major story to write, maybe the second biggest one of my life. I need to get back to work. I need normal.” Her declaration to Erica had opened her up like a soda, and emotions she’d long held at bay were constantly flooding her. Memories of her time in war zones spread through her like poison ivy, but she couldn’t scratch the mental images that flashed in front of her, or block the smell of cordite and blood. It was all too overwhelming, so she turned to her work, the only outlet that served to focus and ground her.
“What about Erica?”
What about Erica? That was a great question. She had poured her heart out to her, in front of everyone, and then Erica had gone on with her work like nothing had happened. Sure, it might have been a moment where she didn’t know if her life was going to end, but it had been the truth all the same. Erica had been too busy with the case to talk to her. She was left vulnerable and raw. And more than that, she was hopeful. She needed to talk to Erica, to find out if their feelings were mutual.
“I’m going to talk to her, but that doesn’t change the fact that I need to work too.” She leaned down and kissed Holly’s nose.
“Okay, if you want to go back, we’ll go back.”
Lucy walked back over to the mirror, letting her hair fall out of the towel. “You make it sound like you’re doing me a favor. Were you going to stay in Clearbrook?”
“No, but I might be making a trip out to New York soon.”
She started brushing her hair. “For what?”
He walked up behind her, gently pushed her into a chair, and continued brushing. “To see MJ.”
“MJ? My brother?” She was confused, and it wasn’t because of the bump on her head.
“Do you know another?”
“I just don’t understand why.” She was suddenly even more exhausted than she had been moments before.
“We like each other,” he said plainly.
“You what?” She turned around in her chair.
He turned her back around and kept working on her hair. “Your brother is bi.”
“No, he’s not.” Her tone was more accusatory than she had intended, but she couldn’t help it.
“Ew. Don’t get all biphobic.”
“I’m not. I just had no idea.” She sighed, wondering what else she didn’t know about her family.
“Well, he hasn’t exactly told your family yet.”
Lucy thought back to what Erica had said. She knew. “You sure about that?”
“Your parents don’t know. And you aren’t going to be the one to tell them.”
“And you’re going to date someone who’s in the closet?” She was concerned about what this could do to Grayson.
“Not normally, but I really like him. I want to see where this goes.”
“It’s going nowhere. MJ is a womanizer, a player, and it’s going to end badly. I have watched him go through woman after woman. He has a cycle, and you’re about to become part of it.” She probably should have worded her warning plea better, but she couldn’t rein in all of her emotions.
He turned her around in her chair and knelt in front of her, putting his hands on her legs. “I know you’re going through a lot right now. More than I can possibly ever hope to understand. For that reason, I’m going to say this as nicely as I possibly can. But don’t project your bullshit on me. We like each other and we are going to see where it goes.”
She wasn’t trying to project anything; she just didn’t want to see Grayson get hurt. MJ was always looking for the next best thing, always thinking the grass was greener on the other side. Wasn’t that exactly what I thought when I left Erica? “Okay, you’re right. Good luck.”
He stood, pulling her hair back. “Don’t say good luck like you’re sending me off to a war zone. It’s just New York. I hear they have good bagels out there, and you know I love a good bagel.”
* * *
Erica paced her living room, Bella watching each pass, watching her. “I eat over there at least once a week. Tonight’s no different and we finally caught him. We should be happy.”
Bella yawned and Erica nodded. “I know, thank you for agreeing. Okay, so we’ll just go over there and eat. No big deal. I’ll find Lucy and we’ll talk. We’ll finally get all of this out in the open. I’ll tell her that I do still have feelings for her and that we should give it another try. Easy, right?”
Bella let her legs scoot out in front of her until her body lay flush against the floor, her ears falling beside her head, giving her a melting effect. “What? You don’t agree? Of course you agree. You love Lucy.” She sat down on the floor next to Bella and put a hand on her back. “We can do this, Bella. I mean, hell, I shot someone today. This is nothing.” She touched her head. “Want to go see Grandpa and Grandma?” Bella pushed her body upright and ran to the table to grab her leash. She trotted back over a moment later with it in her mouth. “Okay, let’s go.”
A few minutes later, she pulled up alongside the familiar house and put the car in park. She had been to this house thousands of times in her life. It was like a second home. The tree out front still had Lucy + Erica Forever carved in the trunk. Erica had carved it two years before they had ever kissed, her soul knowing long before she did that Lucy was who it desired. They had sworn to be friends forever, no matter what happened.
Bella started whining when Miguel walked out the front door waving. Erica opened the car door, and Bella took off across the street, running to him. Erica picked up the leash and tossed it back into the car, wondering why she even bothered to bring it.
Miguel opened the door for Bella, who trotted in to be welcomed by Sofia and Maria, who showered her with hugs and kisses and what looked like a small hamburger.
Miguel surprised her by pulling her into a big hug. “Thank you, mija. Thank you.”
Erica hugged him back, understanding how grateful he was for his daughter’s safety. Little did he know how grateful she was, too. After a moment, he patted her back. “Let’s go inside.”
Three things were always true of the Rodriguez house—there was always too much food, there was always plenty of beer, and it was always much louder than you would have thought possible for the amount of people inside. Erica saw Lucy right away, sitting in a corner, holding her niece and in what looked like a serious conversation with her sister-in-law. Her heart sped up when she noticed how beautiful she was. She took in a deep breath, knowing she was making the right decision. But she didn’t want to interrupt their conversation, so she headed outside to get a drink. She’d find the perfect time.
She walked into the backyard where Diego and MJ were throwing a football back and forth. She opened the cooler and took out a beer, watching the two men behave like they were fifteen all over again. Grayson sat off to the side on the bench, watching them play. He saw Erica and patted the seat next to him.
She sat and took a sip of beer. “Careful, you’re in the hit zone over here. Diego doesn’t have as accurate of an arm as he thinks.” Not a moment later, a football came whizzing by and MJ trotted by to retrieve it. “Told you.”
Grayson picked up his beer off the ground, now aware of the danger. “How are you? I would ask you for details, but I know you must be tired of reliving it.”
“I’m okay.”
“Eventful day.”
She looked over at MJ who winked in their direction. “I see you’ve caught MJ’s eye.”
“Is he as dangerous as Lucy makes him sound?”
“No, he just hasn’t found what he’s looking for.” She had always thought this of MJ. He had a huge heart; he just hadn’t found the righ
t person to invest it in.
“Oh, I like how you word things. So much better than Lucy.”
“Yeah, well, Lucy has always been very black-and-white. She’s never really been able to see the gray area, you know, the place most of us live.”
“Oh, you don’t have to tell me. I think it’s a reporter thing.”
“Maybe. But she’s been that way since we were kids.”
“Well, then it must have been her calling. I mean, she just went through a traumatic event and she doesn’t even want to take any time off. We’re headed back down to San Diego tomorrow.”
The words were like a punch in the stomach. “You are?”
Grayson answered, but he was focused on MJ’s every move. “Yeah, she says she needs to get back and write this story. I suggested writing it from here, but she wants to go back. I swear her very last days are going to be spent in front of a laptop somewhere, trying to scoop her last story.”
Erica knew he was talking, she saw his mouth moving, but she didn’t hear what he was saying. She knew what she needed to do, and she wasn’t going to let the fear of the unknown or the possibility of something going wrong stop her. She wasn’t going to lose Lucy again, not without telling her what she felt.
She walked into the house and found her sitting on the couch alone, looking tired and contemplative. When she saw Erica approaching, she sat up straighter. Erica couldn’t read the expression on her face, but she looked guarded.
“Can I talk to you for a minute?” Her heart was hammering. She could feel it in every part of her body.
“Sure.” She got up and led the way out the front door.
Erica pulled the door closed, buying herself a few extra seconds, trying to work out exactly what she wanted to say. She turned and looked at Lucy. Her arms were crossed and her shoulders were scrunched. She looked so vulnerable, so unlike her usual confident self. Erica had been scared to bare her soul. She wasn’t now, and she wouldn’t be anymore. She thought about what to say next, but there were no words that could articulate what she felt.
