“Okay. As far as I can see, the two of you are not talking to one another unless absolutely necessary. Why is that? What has caused this? Before either of you answer, I’m going to allow you each to respond with your own thoughts. I want to make it clear that no one interrupts the other. Go it?”
“Fine by me,” I said.
“Got it,” Michael said.
Donnie nodded to both of us. “Very well. Michael, why don’t you answer first.”
“Alright,” Michael said. He leaned forward and held both hands together. I could see his mind ticking over to try and think of the right words. For a lawyer, he seemed to be having trouble coming up with the right thing to say. Had our relationship stumped him that much?
“If I’m honest, our breakdown in communication started the day Erika went into labor.”
My eyes almost bulged out of my head. We’d had problems before then. And how could he refer to that moment to highlight something negative? I went to jump in, but Donnie anticipated this and held up a hand to remind me to bite my tongue. It pained me to do so, but I let Michael continue.
“And what was it about that day that made things so difficult between you both?”
Michael’s mouth twisted into an ironic smile, but his eyes were welling up. He shook his head. “Ever since that day, Erika has only focused on Bunny, and not the problems anyone can clearly see she is having. I know things changed a lot in that moment, but I…” He trailed off and lowered his head until no one could see his face.
“That’s okay, Michael. Take a minute to think.” Donnie turned to me. “And you, Erika, what was it about that day that caused you to have tension with Michael?”
I uncrossed my arms and leaned closer to the doctor. “It was more than a bit of tension; I was frightened of him.”
“Frightened?”
“Yes. After her birth, I knew he’d be upset and disappointed with how our Bunny came into the world. I knew everything would be my fault, and that I’d get the blame for the emergency birth and for not doing the right things during my pregnancy. Well, I know what you want to hear, so I’ll just come out and say it: it was my fault; I screwed up. Is that better? God, I never wanted things to go that way either, but they did.” I could feel my heart racing in my chest. My voice was too loud and I realized too late that my hands were flailing about.
Alice gave out a long wail, having been abruptly woken more than an hour before she naturally would. I cursed under my breath. “Great. Now I’ve woken her up.”
Michael and Donnie glanced at each other as I jumped to my feet and headed for the bedroom.
“Erika?” Donnie said.
I paused, but my impatience was clear. This doctor had less than ten seconds to get out whatever it was that he wanted to say.
“Why don’t you leave her for a moment, huh? I’m sure she’ll be okay.”
“Are you serious? She’s crying because I woke her with my loud words; words that you encouraged to come out of me.”
Michael tried to cut in. “Erika, please—”
“No. Don’t try and quiet me down to make yourself look better. I’m trying to express myself here. Isn’t that what all of this crap is supposed to be about?”
Alice cried harder, begging for my attention. I went to leave again.
“Erika,” Donnie said. “Please come back and sit down for thirty seconds. If she doesn’t settle in that time, you can leave.”
I threw up my hands. “Fine, but this is a waste of time.” I walked away from the crying, back to the lounge. I sat down on the edge of my seat, ready to get up and go.
“Close your eyes and focus on your breathing.”
I looked at Donnie like he was the most prominent moron in the world. “Okay, but this won’t help.” I closed my eyes and focused on my lungs, filling them with air and emptying them after a held count, the way I had learned in the yoga classes I never attended anymore. As if by magic, Alice settled. I turned to Donnie. “You got lucky.”
“It was worth a shot,” he said. “Now, you have both answered my first question honestly, in the way you each interpret things to be. I want to ask you another question, and again, I want Michael to answer first.”
“Fine,” I said.
“Go ahead,” Michael replied.
“Very well. What are you each afraid is going to happen?”
Michael leaned back into his seat and put his hands on his head as he let out a long sigh. “A lot of things. I’m scared that I’ll lose my job, that we’ll lose this apartment. But most of all, if I’m absolutely honest, I’m scared we’ll lose everything we’ve built together, that all of these years we’ve been a couple has been for nothing.”
Donnie nodded while I did what I could to contain the many questions I wanted to throw at Michael. Was he acting in front of Donnie to show he cared about our marriage? We both knew he didn’t. I had to do everything within my power to keep my cool.
“And you, Erika? What are you afraid is going to happen?”
I stared at the doctor as my mind span around in circles. I thought about giving some generic answer just to satisfy whatever it was that this session was supposed to achieve, but instead, the truth came into my thoughts and wanted to spill out into the world.
I thought about the last three months, and Michael’s approach to Alice and me. The way he stared at her and leaned over the bassinet, ignoring me like I was worthless, told me my answer.
I stared at Donnie. “I’m scared Michael is going to take my Bunny away from me.”
Thirty-One
Now
An echo bounces off the wall of the elevator crawl space. Gus shows me the ladder between levels and how to open each access point to head down to the next section. It’s a crazy plan, but it’s the best way for us to rule out the elevator shaft as a hiding spot.
I try to move without making a lot of noise, but it’s near impossible. The movements of the elevator, as well as a loud, continuous hum, drown out some of the sounds, but the metal hinges are too rusty and old to be completely silent.
The elevator is sitting on floor thirteen, waiting for its next command. The back of the elevator looks unsafe; I feel nervous just being near it. I keep my fears from Gus, not wanting to worry him.
I climb down the fixed metal ladder to level thirteen. I had already scouted ahead and couldn’t see Desmond there. I squint through the grate below my feet, but I won’t be able to see the next level down until I reach the floor.
My feet land on the catwalk louder than I wanted them to. The noise will travel and potentially spook Desmond if he is on any of the floors below. “Come on. You can do this,” I tell myself in a whisper. I think about Alice. If she’s down here, she is being forced to hide behind the very thing that caused her to run in the first place. Her small belly will be churning away with the sight of the elevator going up and down.
I refocus and drop to the grated floor as quickly as I can to spy down to the next section. Twelve looks clear, so I open the ladder hatch and cringe as it creaks and squeals out for lubricant. Gus is not far behind, staying one level above me at all times. If I get attacked by Desmond, so be it. At least Gus will know precisely where the ex-con is hiding Alice, and he’ll be able to do something about it.
I am prepared to die for Bunny. I know most parents say they’d do anything for their children, but would they make the ultimate sacrifice when push came to shove? Would they give up everything just to give their child a fighting chance? I know I would. Would Michael? He would probably just pay someone to do the dying for him. It’s how he solves all of his problems.
I reach twelve and find an identical setup. I repeat the process and drop down to spy ahead. Nothing suspicious meets my eyes.
We keep up this rhythm until I reach level nine. I look down through the grate below. I see a blurry figure beyond the next few levels of catwalk, standing on the seventh floor. At least I think I see something. Whatever it is, it’s moving.
I look up to Gu
s and hold a finger to my lips to make sure he stays silent. I point out there is a person below. He moves down to my level and takes a look. He spots them moving around in the same section as well. Neither of us says a word as we try to decipher what it is we are witnessing.
It has to be Desmond. Unless it’s another maintenance worker I haven’t met, there’s no one else who would have a reason to be back here like we are. I try to confirm my suspicions with a few whispered words.
“How many maintenance people are working today?”
“You’re looking at him. Most days there’s three of us on the schedule, but my co-workers called in sick. No one offered to cover.”
I scoff at my luck. Of all the days for two people to call in sick… I need all the help I can get to go against Michael.
I glance down again two levels below before looking over to Gus. “So who is that, then? No one should be back here except us or Desmond.”
Gus takes a good hard look down with squinted eyes. “They aren’t in uniform. I can’t make out if it’s Desmond or not. We need to move down to the next level.”
“Okay,” I say, barely audible enough to hear the word myself. I remember that Desmond was wearing casual clothing when he ran away from Henry and me.
I creep to the ladder and open the hatch for access. The figure below starts to pace back and forth as I lower myself down. This has to be Desmond. I can feel it in my bones.
I reach eight and quietly drop down to my hands and knees to spy through the grate. Sure enough, I see Desmond moving back and forth along the catwalk. “Got you,” I whisper to myself. My next concern is to spot Alice. I look around, trying to spy past the metal grate as best I can, until I find a pair of small shoes off to the side of the catwalk. “Alice,” I say, welling up. She’s right there, so close I feel like I could reach out and touch her.
She’s sitting on a box. I can only see her legs from the knees down. Her coat almost reaches that length when she is standing, as I decided to buy one that would last a few years. I could have used Michael’s child support to buy her a new coat every year, but any extra money I didn’t spend went straight into a bank account for Alice, so she could one day afford to go to college.
Gus catches up with me and spots Desmond the second he spies through the grate. He shakes his head at him in disgust. I point out Alice’s legs. The second Gus sees them, his hand flies up to cover his mouth. The confirmation that Desmond has taken a little girl is almost too much for him to handle. “Son of a bitch,” he mutters.
“What do we do?” I ask. “I don’t see a weapon. How can we get down there without tipping him off?” I’m amazed he hasn’t heard us yet. Fortunately, I doubt Desmond is expecting anyone to approach him from above or below like this. He must be too focused on the plan, whatever that is.
“You take the stairs down to the next level and make your way in from the side to grab Alice and run,” Gus says. “As soon as I see you, I’ll make a distraction from above.”
I nod with a grimace. It’s the best plan I’ve heard all day. Desmond won’t see it coming, either. As far as he knows, the police are on their way to search the building for a missing child. He doesn’t realize they are now coming to arrest a kidnapper. Whatever made him use the elevator earlier with Alice must have been important. I can’t imagine him leaving the area anytime soon. We can take our time and do this right. If we time it correctly, we’ll scare him away from Alice, right into the approaching police officers.
“Ready when you are,” I say to Gus.
“Alright. You make your way across and down while I stay up here. I’ll keep my eyes on Alice. As soon as I see you take her, I’ll make as much noise as I possibly can. Desmond will be so spooked, he won’t know where to look.”
“Easy,” I say. I walk silently along the catwalk and keep my eyes trained on Alice. Or on her legs, at least. Gus stays where he is to provide a distraction from above Desmond. I spot the oversize wrench hanging off the end of a toolbox in my path a second too late. I step right into it, bashing the tool on my shin. The wrench falls off the box and makes an almighty crashing sound when it hits the metal grate as I drop down in a failed attempt to catch it.
I snap my head below to see Desmond staring up at us with surprise in his eyes. He runs before I can say a word, grabbing Alice by the hand. I hear him command her to run with him, back through the side of the service area and out of sight.
“No!” I yell, as I scramble to my feet and chase after them. I pull the ladder hatch up with a yank and force my feet down onto the first rung. I half fall down the hole and land awkwardly with a thud.
“What are you doing?” Gus yells down to me, as I take off after Desmond.
Thirty-Two
There’s no way I’m letting Desmond out of my sight as I bash and squeeze my way through the service tunnel on level seven. He is only a short distance away, pulling Alice by the hand. I can picture her little legs trying hard to keep up while he yanks her along by the arm. Every ounce of pain he inflicts on my daughter will come back to him in double, I swear it. I will replace my fear with rage.
Gus is too far behind to be of use, so I ignore his yelling. I didn’t see a gun in Desmond’s possession, so I don’t slow down. He could shoot at me all he wanted, though, and I’d still give chase until I drew my last breath. No one can stop me from saving my Bunny from Michael’s plans. I will get her back from this awful building, no matter the cost.
I spill out the service door, which is beside the elevator, and look left and right. I can’t see Desmond or Alice. At this point, he could be heading to his apartment, Alan’s apartment, or one of the empty ones. My best option is to make as much noise as I can and try to force Desmond out from hiding. This has gone on long enough.
I bash on the first door I see and shout his name. “Desmond! Open up.” I move along, knocking three times with a balled-up fist on each door as I continue to shout. “Desmond, come out! I know you’re here. You can’t hide from me any longer.”
After pounding on a few doors, one behind me opens up. The older lady I spotted gawking at me earlier before pokes her head out with a scowl to see what all the fuss is about.
“You again,” she says. “Why are you making all this racket?”
“I need to find Desmond. Did you see him come by here at all? He’s taken my daughter.”
She looks shocked at this piece of information. “Desmond?”
“Yes. He took my little girl. I need to find him, right now.”
The woman looks me up and down with a squint. “Come on in, dear. I think I can help you.”
“Thank you,” I say, letting out a sigh of relief. I follow into her apartment, which smells of vegetable soup. She takes entirely too long to move through the small entryway just outside the kitchen area. I don’t bother to close her front door—I’ll be out of here and continuing my search any minute.
“Did you see them come by?” I ask.
“We’ll get to that, dear. Just follow me.”
I comply, but I’m dancing on the spot like I’m desperate to use the restroom. I take a look back at the front door and consider running back out and leaving the old woman behind. I don’t have time for this.
“If you haven’t seen them, that’s fine. I really need to—”
“One moment, dear,” she says, as she rummages through a drawer in the kitchen. I don’t know what the hell this is all about. I need to go. This was a terrible idea, I suddenly realize. Time is evaporating before my eyes.
“I’m going to go,” I say.
The woman shuffles back to me and reaches out. She grabs my right hand with both of her own. “Nonsense, dear. You need to take a moment to slow down.”
I stare into her eyes as she cups my hand between hers. What is this? I get my answer a moment later when I hear the click of the handcuff around my wrist. Before I can react, she connects the other end to a pipe that is fixed to the radiator panel close to the kitchen.
“What are
you doing?” I yell, while the old lady backs away with crossed arms and a smug expression.
I yank hard on the cuffs and instantly feel their strength. “You don’t understand. I need to find Desmond before it’s too late.”
“You’ll do no such thing. I’m calling the police.”
“What? No, you need to listen to me. Desmond has—”
“Keep your mouth shut,” she says to me with a raised voice, pulling out a cell phone that has to be around five years old. “I’m calling the police so they can take you away.”
“You don’t understand what you’re doing. Desmond has—”
“Desmond is probably just trying to get away from you and your lies,” she says. “You must be harassing him. He would never take someone’s little girl, so I’m going to have you arrested so you leave that nice young man alone.”
I pull harder and harder on the cuffs, hurting myself in the process. Why does this old bat have handcuffs in her kitchen drawer? I don’t have time to work out why. I realize Gus will have no idea where I am unless he walks right by her door. I have no choice but to get through to this woman before she hits me over the head with a rolling pin.
“Desmond has taken my daughter. He has her with him right now. I was trying to find him before he—”
“I don’t want to hear it,” the woman says, as she waits on the line for the emergency services.
“Are you serious?” I ask. Either this woman is an idiot, or she has a thing for Desmond. It doesn’t matter which explanation is closest to the truth; she thinks I’m the enemy and won’t be happy until the police arrive.
The police will be here any moment now to speak to Henry as it is. He will fill them in and make sure that they know I’m not the bad guy here. The only problem is that he doesn’t know where I am. I should have borrowed that cell phone again. Stupid. All the while, Alice is still with Desmond, their whereabouts now unknown.
I have no chance of getting out of these cuffs with the old woman staring at me. She obviously thinks I’m some deranged troublemaker, coming into her world to make things difficult for poor Desmond. If only she knew the truth.
The Day I Lost You: A totally gripping psychological thriller Page 16
