Never Let Go (The Storm Inside #4)

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Never Let Go (The Storm Inside #4) Page 14

by Alexis Anne


  “Okay…” I drawled, my mouth full of food.

  “I honestly believe they are so ignorant and oblivious it did not occur to them how incredibly stupid they were.”

  I washed down my food with a bottle of red wine. “What?”

  He cocked his head to the side. “Babe. Could you imagine my life before you were in the middle of it?”

  I shook my head. I really couldn’t.

  “And you’re you. You’re sweet and empathetic. They’re…” his voice dropped away.

  “Politicians,” I finished for him.

  “Exactly.”

  We ate for a few minutes in silence. “So what did they say that changed things for you?”

  He tossed his pizza onto the box and came over to me. I gave him my hands and he yanked me up, palming my ass. “First, your ass is divine.”

  “Thank you.”

  “Second, will you come sit on top of me while I explain this?”

  I looked past him at our still fairly new chaise lounger. The one we’d been christening when the phone call came in that set all this in motion. “I could do that.”

  He grinned and pulled me over. The moment he was settled, smiling up at me with a huge light in his eyes, I straddled him. He massaged my hips and thighs while I ran my hands over his sculpted chest.

  “They wanted to know everything.”

  My eyebrows rose. “Did you tell them everything?”

  He snorted. “No. They couldn’t handle that level of reality and still keep their heads out of the sand. I started with the basics and when I saw their eyes starting to glaze over, I stopped.”

  Without thinking my fingers had started to trace Jake’s scars. One was too many, but Jake had dozens. Broken bones, cuts, and a million bruises that didn’t leave their permanent mark in a visible way.

  He watched my fingers dance. “You know what? I like to imagine that every time you do that, you erase a little bit of what made them.”

  My heart skipped a beat. “I do, too.”

  He took my hands in his, kissing the tips of each finger. “They don’t want to keep their heads in the sand, and there’s nothing they can do to go back and fix the past. I want the girls to have more family and I’d like to continue growing my relationship with my cousins. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to be close with my grandparents—or if they’re even capable of it—but I think a few holidays here and there are worth finding out.”

  I nodded, love and feelings pulsing through me, searching for a way out. “Of course.” If that was what Jake wanted, then I was sure as hell going to back him up.

  “That’s enough talking,” he smiled. “Shut up and kiss me.”

  I nodded a bunch, then fell over, bathing him in a million kisses until he started laughing.

  “I love you, Jake. I just want to be happy together.”

  “Me too, darlin’. I’m sorry we lost time but I’m not sorry we got this unexpected night at home alone.”

  He rocked his hips up into mine. I pressed back. “I’m sure we can find some fun things to do.”

  “Mmmm… like staying up all night having sex?”

  I nodded. Who needed sleep? If motherhood had proven anything to me, it was that I did not need a lot of sleep. “I’m back on the clock as soon as we hit the road in the morning. I highly suggest you make the most of the time you have.”

  And then all of a sudden I was on my back and Jake’s head was between my legs.

  “C’MERE, baby.” Jake beckoned me into the shower. I melded against him. How is it that my head fit so perfectly against his pecs? And that his hand fell perfectly to press into the small of my back? Or that he could rest his head on top of mine?

  “I’m still wearing my underwear.” It was ridiculously early but I’d wanted to have shower sex before we drove south.

  “I know,” he rumbled. “Undressing you is one of my favorite things.” He yanked my t-shirt over my head, then pushed down my underwear. Jake’s naked erection pressed into my belly without anything between us.

  “What do you need from me, darlin’?”

  He was right—I needed something from him. That was why I was folded into his chest as if it were the embodiment of comfort. It was why I was hanging on each syllable he spoke and staring into his eyes every chance he gave me. I realized, as his hand slid up and down the small of my back, sending comfort from his capable hands through my skin and into my soul, that Jake had recognized this much earlier in the day. He’d shifted from relaxed and carefree to attentive and protective as we fell asleep last night.

  What did I need? I traced the beads of water as they created different tracks across his chest. “You’re beautiful,” I murmured.

  “Thank you.”

  That was all he said, giving me time and space to figure myself out. He was perfect. His skin, while scarred, was warm and taut over sculpted muscles more than capable of caring for me and his daughters at every turn—even when his life was in chaos.

  That was it.

  That. I felt the niggle of recognition as something I’d just thought caught and flamed in my heart. “I love you.”

  He smiled and squeezed me tighter, his cock pulsing in proud happiness between us.

  “And…I love everything about us.” I bit my lower lip as my mind wandered to dirtier pastures. Jake’s fist in my hair and his hand on my hip as he drove hard and deep into me from behind.

  Or Jake’s fist in my hair as he held me shaking against his thigh after I’d blown his mind.

  Or Jake groans of pleasure as I rode him into oblivion.

  Okay, clearly I was horny—and apparently in the mood for a good hair tugging—but it was more than that. I needed the intensity that came from the two of us being completely abandoned to our passion for each other.

  I cleared my throat. “I know you hate the word as much as I do, but we’re luckier than most.”

  He didn’t grimace or make any reaction, really. Just held my gaze, steady and open for whatever was coming.

  “And because of the downs…” Damn. Why was this so hard to spit out? “Because of the downs I feel how precious everything else is.”

  Understanding dawned in his eyes. “Oh, Eve…” the protective need and arousal in Jake’s voice pushed me to an entirely new level of horny. At this rate I was going to be begging before we were done shampooing.

  I got like this from time to time. My feelings took on a life of their own. And my favorite way to feel them—to really feel them—was through completely uninhibited love with my husband. It was always intense. Exhausting. And damn good.

  “We have two amazing daughters. They are healthy and happy…” I was still amazed by that small miracle. “We have a wonderful woman who helps us raise them, and my sister is next door. I love my job. It’s secure and it makes me happy every day. You love your company and work with your best friend. We have an amazing house—”

  Jake shut me up with a deep kiss. There was no preamble. His tongue was between my lips and stroking down along mine in a flash. I kissed him back just as hard, my fingers instantly in his hair, threading their way through until I felt just enough to make a fist and tug.

  He groaned into our kiss and pressed his hard cock into my belly. One hand delicately held my lower back while the other pressed between my shoulder blades, controlling our kiss with subtle changes in pressure.

  “Stop talking before I maul you against this cold, hard tile,” he growled, his eyes open and bright. I loved the feel of his heart hammering in his chest and the blood pumping through his veins. It mirrored mine in every way possible.

  “I want to soak up every moment. Every feeling. I want to remember it all,” I said anyway, consequences be damned.

  He gave me a playful scowl. “No more. I mean it this time. I know what you’re going to say next and I don’t want to hear it.” So he kissed me and ran his hands down to my hips, jerking and adjusting me to his preference before dropping to his knees and throwing my leg over his sho
ulder so that I was spread before him the way that he liked.

  He growled in appreciation of my summer trimming and then deliberately and slowly licked his way into my folds so that I’d be too pleasured to say anything other than how I wanted his cock.

  But inside my head I finished my thoughts. I’m memorizing everything so that when things are hard I have these moments to keep me warm. Because life isn’t perfect, but I’m damn lucky to have what I have. I wished I could go back and let my younger self know that everything would work out. That Jake would come home and we’d grow old together. So many years of doubt and worry… and yet, it had given me a healthy appreciation for this.

  I threaded my fingers into the longer hair on the top of his head and relaxed against the shower tiles while Jake teased me just the right amount to get my engines roaring to life.

  “Don’t let me come,” I gasped as he circled his index finger at the entrance to my sex.

  He paused and looked up at me with dark, hooded eyes. “Are you wet for me?”

  God. Was I ever not wet for him? “You tell me.”

  He moved with great restraint—as if he were ready to throw me on the floor and claim my body over and over until it was clear to every man on earth that I was his and his alone. He swallowed hard and his Adam’s apple bobbed. He tilted his head back far enough to see my reaction as he entered me.

  I gasped as his large finger slid inside and swirled, then out and returned with a second digit. I smacked my hands against the wall as my entire body zinged with electricity.

  “Yes, darlin’, you are very wet for me,” he purred, his eyes dropping to the slickness on his fingers. “But are you ready?”

  That…oh, his words. They did dirty, dirty things to me and I trembled. “Not even a little bit.”

  He rocked back enough to find the body wash, poured it into his palm and lathered it up. Then he began to wash me. Since he was so much larger than me he was able to do most of it from his knees. He made quick work of my neck and arms, then took his time as he carefully massaged my breasts, dipping his mouth to my clit.

  I moaned, breaking eye contact so I could close my eyes and give myself fully to the pleasure. He worked me right up to the brink, then stopped and resumed his careful washing of my stomach and legs, then back up to my swollen sex.

  “Turn,” he demanded.

  I turned, pressing my palms against the tile that was now warmed by my body. He grunted appreciatively as he massaged my ass, then down between my cheeks, pausing to lightly massage every nook and cranny with the utmost care.

  Jake was as greedy a lover as I was at times, but he was always first and foremost considerate. He tested my wants with these slow explorations. Did I want more pressure on my core or my clit? Fast strokes or the long slow ones that made me sigh? Were my nipples sensitive enough for pinching and rolling to be fun, or too sensitive and better suited to careful strokes of his tongue? He collected his data until he was satisfied he’d mapped my needs, then stood and grabbed the showerhead, rinsing me from head to toe.

  “Wash your hair.”

  I grinned. “Wash yours.”

  He grinned back and we maneuvered around each other until both our heads were clean and conditioned. Then I grabbed the body wash and performed by own inspection of Jake’s needs and wants.

  His nipples were almost always so sensitive he preferred I skip over them, but every so often he groaned—just like that—and I put it in my back pocket as a stop on my tour. He was very tactile today. My touch seemed to do all the things to his cock that my mouth did. I ran my hands down his chest, massaged his biceps, then traced the water down his happy trail to his cock. I gripped him lightly, giving his length a few test strokes as I watched his lids grown heavy. A slight smile curved the corners of his lips.

  Oh yes, Jake was in the mood for a long, torturous romp, too. This would be fun.

  Maybe too much fun, but probably just the right amount to release all the feelings running wild inside my head.

  I dropped to my knees and carefully massaged his thighs. Higher and higher, until I reached the point he was ticklish. Then I wrapped my palm around his balls and gave them a gentle massage, promising there was a great deal more of that to come.

  “Fuck, Eve. Your hands…”

  I looked up. “Aren’t quite the same as my mouth?” I arched an eyebrow as his eyes widened at the sight of my open mouth millimeters from the head of his cock. I waited until the artery in his neck started pounding before I closed the gap and wrapped the warmth of my mouth around the sweetness of his dick.

  Because, yeah, when he was this aroused for this long, he tasted sweet. With a delicate mix of salty thanks to the beads of precum that kept forming in the slit at the tip of his cock.

  Suddenly the shower was off and Jake’s hands were under my arms. “Stop.” He shuddered. “I don’t think I can take another second.”

  I sucked harder. Jake wanted long, drawn out pleasure as much as I did, but he also liked to feel of my mouth. I swirled around his head with my tongue, then rocked back on my heels.

  “Let me do this,” I pleaded. “Let’s get you started off right. I’m going to be greedy today, babe. Really fucking greedy. And I want you ready for it.”

  He swallowed down a string of swear words. “Put your mouth back on me before I come on your face. When you say things like that…” He didn’t finish that sentence. Well, not with words. There was a hiss that melted into a moan that didn’t stop for the next sixty seconds as I sucked and hummed up and down his cock, picking up speed the way he liked. Then I blindly reached up to find his hand. I placed it on my head so he could take control of the speed while I managed the depth.

  His fingers massaged at first, then tightened as he lost control. That was when I cupped his balls again, gently massaging at first, and then as the head of his cock knocked the back of my throat, I gave them a firm tug.

  I swallowed as he twitched, drawing his orgasm right to the brink of what he could stand without falling over—I’d made that mistake during shower sex before and it had very nearly ended in stiches.

  He threw out his hands to steady his shaking body and I made one last long trip down his length, then sat back and took in the sight of my husband completely blissed out by the pleasure I’d given him.

  It was a beautiful sight. Jake always looked handsome, but the completely relaxed and happy version of post-orgasm Jake was one of a kind. And one that only I got to see, so in my overly emotional state, I took that in, too, memorizing it—just in case.

  Besides, it would fuel a few fantasies. Late night phone sex when one of us was on the road…yeah. This would be front and center in my mind.

  “Stop looking at me like that,” he breathed.

  “Like what?”

  He reached down and took my face in his hands. “Like you could do that again and again.”

  I practically purred. “I was picturing that, actually.”

  He groaned and threw back his head. “You are a danger to my health. But first? I need to return the favor. Dry off. Wait for me on the bed.”

  It had been just long enough since Jake’s mouth was on me. I was still needy and a little bit swollen with desire, but not on the brink. I was primed.

  And when Jake appeared in the doorway, he was a recovered man ready for more.

  And more, and more, and more.

  Yes!

  He was gloriously naked. Backlit by the bathroom lights. The shadows highlighted the definition of his long lines and hard muscles. It highlighted the width of his shoulders and the tautness of his hips. There was a glint in his eyes. It wasn’t quite an uncontrolled burning anymore—but it was close.

  “You want me?” he asked. It wasn’t really a question so much as a game.

  “Yes,” I murmured, my core clenching at the idea of Jake on top of me.

  “Hard?” Again, it wasn’t really a question. He already knew the answer.

  “Yes,” I whispered the word like it
breathed life into my soul.

  I think it did the same to his. The energy shifted. My needs turned him on and unlocked that base male instinct to claim and satisfy his woman. He began to prowl toward where I sat on the edge of the bed.

  “I’m going to pleasure you until you beg for me to be inside you.”

  I swallowed. Yes.

  “And then?” He threaded his hand around the back of my neck and into my hair. “I’m going to make you scream my name.”

  This time I said it out loud. It escaped from my throat and poured out over my lips. “Yes…”

  His other hand moved into my hair, too. “Look at me, baby.”

  I opened my eyes. “Jake…”

  He shook his head, hushing my untamed feelings. “You see what you’ve done to me?”

  Sure enough he was hard and bobbing in front of me. And just close enough to taste. I leaned forward and pulled him into my mouth all over again. With his hands in my hair he arched his hips forward. I groaned as his head pressed against the back of my throat.

  “Your turn,” he said, his voice low and full of promise. “Stand for me.”

  He pushed me back toward the bathroom with his hand on the small of my back.

  “Here.”

  We stopped in the doorway, just inside the bedroom. He took my right hand and placed it above my head on the doorjamb. He walked around and did the same for my left hand, then stood behind me, grinning above my head in the mirror. “Almost.”

  I watched as he moved around me, positioning my feet so that he had me just where he wanted me. The mirror was a very nice touch. Not only did it allow me a chance to appreciate my own body, but it gave me a chance to see every single move Jake made. Every flex of his muscles, every twitch of restraint. Every longing gaze.

  A shudder slid down my spine, landing between my legs where I was already wet and wanting. Jake licked his lips.

  “You like talking tonight?”

  I nodded—a little too quickly—but at least he knew just how much he was affecting me. One the fascinating things about being with Jake for so long was that we’d evolved together. Our sex life had changed and morphed several times with our wants and needs. Careful and tentative after our children entered our lives. Intense and appreciative when thing returned to normal. Slow when life was hard, hard when life was overwhelming, experimental when it was downright unbearable, and back through the loop all over again. I appreciated having a lover I could trust with my desires—someone who cared about my wellbeing more than his own, because, ultimately, his wellbeing was tied to mine.

 

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