“This is fine,” she said, her voice raw. The icy air did a number on her, in spite of the couch throw she wrapped around her face and throat.
As she ate, the weariness began to fade somewhat, and enough strength returned for her to consider her current circumstances.
“I have to let my parents know I’m alright,” she said, wondering where her phone was. Probably wherever her jeans were, she thought with irritation. She pulled the robe more tightly around her.
“They know,” Rob assured her. “Erik told them.”
She relaxed a little.
“There’s still phone service?”
“So far,” Rob replied.
Samantha glanced at the window as icy snowflakes rattled against the panes. The ceaseless wind struck the small cabin, and she shuddered at the resulting vibration. It felt as though it would be torn apart.
“Erik and I don’t cut corners,” Rob reminded her. Cheating people, wasn’t one of his sins. Although… he cheated his wife, by giving his time and attention to just about everything, and everyone, but her.
She wondered at the shadow that crossed his face, and he caught her looking at him.
“Will it upset you, if I say I’m sorry?” he asked.
She shifted in her seat, and focused on her stew.
“How long before we can leave?” she wondered, rather than answer.
Rob felt disappointment. He wanted to tell her he was sorry, and he wanted her to believe him. He wanted her forgiveness. A flash of anger tried to join the despair he felt, but he recognized it for what it was. He ordered it away, and it left him.
“I can’t say for certain,” he replied, taking his phone from his pocket. “But judging by the weather and radar apps, it could be several days.”
“Several days!” she said in dismay. The thought of being separated from her son for so long, left her feeling sick.
“There could be an unforeseen break in the weather,” Rob continued. “This storm wasn’t supposed to happen at all. So… there’s no telling.”
Samantha looked as distressed as she felt. He knew she didn’t want to be stuck with him, but he wondered if there was something else the matter. Maybe she was afraid.
“I’ll make sure you have everything you need until you’re back home, safe and sound. I promise, I will,” Rob vowed. “We have what we need, for now. The other cabins should also be stocked, I know some of them are. When there’s a break in the storm, I’ll scavenge for whatever I can find and add it to our supplies.”
She nodded in resignation, and turned her attention back to her meal.
“We, uh… had some excitement yesterday,” Rob said, and she glanced at him. “Erik and I, did. Someone’s been trying to slow down development, and I guess they weren’t satisfied with their lack of success. They rigged one of the models to explode. And… you don’t look at all surprised.”
“Amber told me,” she managed to say. Her voice wasn’t cooperating at all. She might as well have laryngitis.
“Oh. Right. She insisted on helping Erik investigate, I guess she told you everything.”
Samantha’s eyebrows rose and she gave him a startled look.
Evidently, Amber did not tell her that.
“What?” she gasped.
“Yeah… that’s what he told me. They’re probably at our grandparents, right now. That’s where they’re starting. Grampa has experience and advice that may help track down whoever’s responsible.”
“Why…” she asked, but the rest of her sentence was inaudible.
“Why would someone try sabotaging this project? Or why would Erik let your little sister tag along, while he investigates?”
Samantha motioned and shrugged, giving him absolutely no idea what she meant. He shrugged too.
“As far as who’s trying to sabotage us, I don’t know for sure. Someone who’ll profit in some way. And Erik said your parents convinced him to let your sister go along.”
Samantha gave him an incredulous look.
Entertaining his estranged wife was a whole lot better than apologizing, upsetting her, and being ordered out of the room. Rob kept talking.
“Erik said she told him she had a gut-feeling, and convinced him something terrible will happen, if she’s not included.”
Samantha seemed to consider that. And accept it.
“What, this is for real?” Rob asked. “You believe it?”
Samantha nodded.
“Huh. I wish you could talk, I’d have a lot of questions for you. I thought she was making it up… except your parents went along. I thought maybe she still had a crush on Erik, and that’s why she said it.”
Samantha considered that, and shrugged a little. Amber probably did.
“Do you want more?” Rob asked, eyeing Samantha’s empty bowl. She shook her head, so he took it, then handed her a bottle of water. “Or… would you rather have a Sprite? Maybe it would soothe your throat.”
She nodded, and Rob swiftly retrieved a can from the refrigerator, and brought it to her.
“I guess the drinks and sandwiches were left over from yesterday’s lunch?” he asked, and she nodded. “It’s great that you remembered, and had the foresight to bring it. You always were smart, and innovative. And that outfit you created! Samantha, that was genius. The pillow stuffing, all of it was awesome. I think—you would’ve done great, if it wasn’t for the wind chill.”
Her eyes darkened and so did his, as they remembered.
“If I’d been thinking like I should, I would’ve helped you,” he said regretfully. “We have contractor bags made of heavy plastic. That would’ve protected you from the wind. Between that, and what you thought of… but I just rushed you out of there, and practically abandoned you after that…”
He was haunted by those memories, and so was she. But as her body absorbed the energy in the stew and the soda in her hand, she was also able to think past it.
She drank, and tried to revive her vocal chords before he started apologizing again.
“Rob…” she managed, and he looked up at her. “The storm. It caught us.”
“Yes. It did,” he replied, wondering why she said it. She cleared her throat, and drank some more.
“If we waited—we’d be frozen right now. At the house. Or lost.”
Rob nodded quickly, relieved ever so slightly, by that realization.
“I guess you’re right. I knew we didn’t have much time. Without a miracle, we never would’ve made it to the cabin, in spite of it. But that doesn’t excuse what I did. I set a pace you couldn’t keep up with. I threatened to leave you behind if you didn’t. I was punishing you for leaving me, and for the guilt I deserved because of how I treated you. I thought—if I could convince myself somehow you were to blame, then you’d deserve how I treated you, and I wouldn’t be guilty. I’m sorry, I know that’s insane. That’s what I’ve been. I’ve had these two sides, battling constantly. I understand now what was happening, and I won’t lose that battle to evil ever again. I won’t, Samantha.”
So much for halting his apologies. She pressed her hand to her forehead and closed her eyes.
There was so much more he wanted to say, but he clenched his teeth together and held it in. He didn’t want her to tell him to go away and leave her alone. So he stopped, watching her anxiously as he waited.
Samantha took a deep breath, and drank some more.
“I forgive you,” she said with difficulty.
“You do? How?” he asked, his voice cracking.
“I just… do,” she replied. If forgiveness meant letting him back in her life, she couldn’t possibly. Not only would she be opening herself up to further dysfunction and heartache, she would be allowing that into Caleb’s life. Reconciliation, she could not do. But forgiveness, she would. As God forgave her, so she was to forgive others. And so, she did.
“I don’t deserve it,” he said, brushing away the moisture from his eyes with his sleeve.
“No one does. It isn’t earned,”
Samantha replied.
“So I’ve been hearing,” he said.
He’d tell her about his conversation with Erik, and what he was learning, if it wouldn’t make him sound like he thought he had it all figured out. He didn’t have it all figured out, and he was hardly in a position to teach someone else. Especially someone he hurt as much, and as recently, as he did her. She might think badly of what he was learning, and he didn’t want that.
She finished her Sprite, and he set the can aside.
“Can I get you anything else?” he asked, as he sat on the coffee table so he could face her. “Maybe some water?”
She shook her head and rearranged her pillows, then lay down.
“How about your back? Does it still hurt?” he asked.
“Yes,” she admitted. He rewarmed one of the pillows, then tucked it under the blankets as he’d done many times since arriving there.
Rob sat on the coffee table again. She felt him watching her, and glanced at him. His eyes were serious.
“Thank you, for forgiving me. I don’t deserve it, and I wouldn’t blame you if you never wanted to try again, but… Please, give me another chance. I don’t want a divorce, and since you never filed, I hope that means you don’t either. I don’t want our marriage to end, and I promise, if you give me another chance, I won’t make the same mistakes, ever again.”
“Rob…” she said, her heart going out to him. If he could always be this humble, and… if only she could trust him. But after everything…
“Samantha, I did things I shouldn’t,” he said in a rush. “But I didn’t have an affair two years ago, I swear I didn’t. I was drunk, and stupid, and—but I got out of there. I said no, and I left. I was sick over the jeopardy I put our marriage in. I never wanted you to know, I knew you’d leave me, I knew you had every right to. I was so scared, and then you had that picture—I was desperate, and instead of telling you the truth and begging you to forgive me, and give me another chance, I accused you of a bunch of stupid things. I don’t know why you never tried to have me committed. Nothing I did ever made any sense.”
Her eyes were locked on his, searching for any sign that he wasn’t being completely truthful. She saw none.
“Do you promise, that’s the worst that happened? You’re telling me the truth?”
“I promise, Samantha! May I be struck dead, if I’m lying to you. I swear it, that’s the truth,” he said, dropping to his knees as he reached for her hands. “I swear, for a whole year I waited, believing you’d come back. Then I gave up, and… I started hanging out with the wrong people again. But I never had an affair, not even then. I’ve never been with anyone else, I promise you. I’ve never wanted to be, either. I just wanted you to come back.”
“Then why didn’t you come to me? Or call me, or… anything?”
“Because I didn’t deserve you, and I knew it. I thought if I begged you to give me another chance, you’d be even more sure you were justified in leaving, and that I’d have no hope of ever getting you back. I thought my only chance was if you came back on your own.”
“Rob…” she sighed. “That doesn’t even make sense.”
“I know, nothing I did made any sense. But I’m not crazy anymore. I won’t ever go back to thinking crazy. I’ll spend the rest of my life proving it, if that’s what it takes.”
Samantha sighed again.
“Then… Rob, I won’t say no. I can’t say yes, but—I won’t say no. That’s… the best I can do.”
Rob kissed her hands over and over.
“Thank you. I won’t let you down. Ever again.”
“Okay,” she sighed, weariness stealing over her. “I’m really tired. I need to sleep.”
“Then you should do that,” he said, kissing her hands several more times before tucking them under the blanket, and tucking the blankets around her. “I’ll be right here if you need me.”
She nodded slightly, and closed her eyes.
Rob quietly retrieved the Bible and notepad from the bedroom. He sat in the cabin’s recliner, next to the couch. If Samantha needed him, he’d know right away.
He let out a deep breath, and felt a wave of thankfulness sweep over him. She didn’t say she would give him a chance, but… he knew her. What she said, was as good as a yes.
He felt intense joy, but it was mixed with fear. He couldn’t mess this up! He had to get it right this time. He remembered the mistakes of the past, then thought over so much of what he read that day.
He was powerless to fight against that sinful nature he read about. Deep inside, he knew that. History proved it. But… he wasn’t alone anymore, he thought, as he looked down at the book in his hand. He had help now, of supernatural proportions. He smiled as his sense of joy grew, and fear subsided.
Rob opened the Bible, and began to read.
ERIK and his grandfather walked down the hall toward the scent of roasting chicken and yeast rolls, fresh out of the oven. They heard light talk, and the sound of Caleb’s laughter. Erik’s grandmother laughed too, and so did Amber.
“You’ve outdone yourself, Gramma,” Erik said, as he and his grandfather entered the kitchen. “I thought you said you didn’t have time to cook Thanksgiving dinner today. That’s not what it looks like to me.”
The island of the cozy, yet spacious kitchen, was lined with bowls and platters filled with as wide a variety of courses as one would find at any fine buffet.
“I couldn’t manage the turkey, not in time for lunch, anyway,” his grandmother replied.
“This is so much better,” Erik declared.
She smiled and set the final dish on the counter, while Amber assigned serving utensils to each. Caleb sat on a blanket on the floor, playing with his new truck.
“Looks like somebody’s awake,” his great-grandfather said, kneeling on the floor beside Caleb. The toddler smiled, and replied. His great-grandfather smiled back. “You’re a friendly fellow.”
“And the most generous little guy I’ve ever met,” Erik commented, as Caleb offered his truck to his grandfather.
“Thank you, son,” he smiled. He looked it over seriously, then handed it back. “That’s a fine truck you’ve got.”
Caleb had more to say to that.
“He’s precious,” was his great-grandmother’s verdict. “Everyone wash up. Dinner’s ready.”
“You’re doing a fine job raising him, for one so young, yourself,” Erik’s grandfather said to Amber, as she knelt to pick up Caleb.
“Thanks,” she replied. Caleb latched onto her necklace, and she carefully pried it out of his fingers.
“That’s a nice necklace you’ve got there,” Erik’s grandfather commented, a gleam of amusement in his eyes.
“It was a gift,” Amber replied, raising an eyebrow at Erik.
He smiled, then busied himself washing his hands.
“I like the color,” his grandmother declared, giving Erik and his grandfather a look.
“So do I,” Amber agreed. “I’m quite proud of it.”
“They had earrings,” Erik volunteered innocently. “Maybe you’d like a pair of those, too.”
“This is more than enough, thank you,” she replied loftily. “I’m not in the habit of accepting jewelry from strange men.”
“I’m not all that strange, am I?” he smiled, and Amber laughed a little. Caleb reached for him, and Erik took him from Amber. She accepted the plate his grandmother held out to her.
“You’re different, that’s for sure,” she said, but it sounded like more of a compliment, than an insult.
“Thank you,” Erik smiled again. “How about this guy? Does he get to eat with us? It’d be shame to stick him with a bowl of Cheerios, while the rest of us feast.”
“Caleb can feast along with us,” Amber replied. “He can eat the same things the rest of us do. As long as they’re in bite-size pieces.”
Caleb clapped and jabbered enthusiastically. Whether it was in response to that, or to something else, Erik had no idea. What h
e knew for certain, was that his and Amber’s nephew was adorable. And he didn’t think that because Caleb looked like him!
“You blessed baby,” Caleb’s great-grandmother said, stopping to pat his cheek. “Your father has no idea what he’s missing.”
“No, he doesn’t,” said his great-grandfather.
“It’s not too late to pray he comes around,” Erik reminded them, but Amber frowned.
“That’s not going to happen.”
“According to first John chapter five, verse fourteen, ‘And we are confident that He hears us whenever we ask for anything that pleases Him,’” Erik pointed out. “We also know that second Peter chapter three, verse nine, says that God doesn’t wish for any to perish, but for all to come to repentance.”
“This is the kind of request most likely to be in accordance with His will,” his grandfather said.
“That’s exactly right,” Erik agreed. “First Timothy two, verses one, three, and four, ‘I urge you, first of all, to pray for all people. Ask God to help them; intercede on their behalf, and give thanks for them. This is good and pleases God our Savior, who wants everyone to be saved and to understand the truth.’”
“Good grief, I wouldn’t dare try and match you in a sword fight,” she said in amazement. “And since you’ve proven your point so completely, then… I guess I’ll pray about it, too.”
“Excellent,” Erik smiled.
ROB flipped to an empty page in the notebook he held. He jotted down his latest question, then got back to reading. Erik would have plenty to explain, whenever he got a chance to talk to him.
It gradually dawned on Rob that the wind was no longer howling. The snap of the fire, and the soft crumbling of the log that settled there, were the only sounds. He glanced over at Samantha. She was still sleeping.
He set aside his notepad and Bible, and quietly rose to his feet. As he walked to the cabin’s picture window, he checked the radar app on his phone. It reflected the break from the storm’s fury, but it wouldn’t last for long. He was amazed at the predicted onslaught.
Disengaged (Terms of Engagement Book 3) Page 12
