“I know you haven’t been particularly happy about the way things have gone in the past year…”
“If I could, I would even back out of the Red Rock project.” Owen paused and shrugged. “I knew it was done as a lottery with the professors, I just didn’t realize it was a mandatory one.”
“They do like to be fair,” Howard reminded him.
“That’s all fine and well when all of the participants who are being considered actually want to be participating!” he cried and then immediately stepped back in embarrassment for raising his voice to his mentor. “What I mean is—”
“I know what you mean, Owen. And I understand.” He studied Owen for a moment. “I think you’ve been looking at this project as some sort of punishment. It’s not meant to be that way. Viewing the meteor shower in Red Rock is an amazing experience! I think if you stopped focusing on the parts of it you are dreading, you’ll find there are many great things about it you will enjoy.”
Sighing, Owen pulled out a chair and sat back down. “Howard, you know I love what I do. But there are people who are just better at that aspect of the job than I am. I enjoy working alone in a lab. I love doing research on my own. I work better alone.” He emphasized those last words.
“It’s not good to be alone all the time, Owen.”
“I grew up in a big family,” Owen replied with a hint of defensiveness. “I was never alone. Now, as an adult, I don’t mind it. And either way, it should be my decision to make and mine alone. I don’t believe a committee should have the right to tell me I need to hone my social skills and force me to participate in heading up events when there are more qualified interested parties!”
“Some would disagree.”
Owen took a steadying breath. “How much more enjoyable and educational would it be for a group of students to participate in an exciting event that was being led by someone who is passionate about being there? I believe what is happening now—forcing me to take this on—will be a disservice to those students. So is it worth it? For the university—for the faculty—to try to prove a point no one asked them to prove?”
Owen’s heart was racing, and he knew he was sweating, but he didn’t care. It felt wonderful to get his feelings off his chest. Even if they didn’t change a damn thing, Owen felt better just saying the words out loud. Maybe talking to Quinn was better for him than he could have imagined.
Swallowing hard, Owen looked at Howard and expected to see disappointment—or at the very least a hint of anger for his tirade—but what he saw was compassion. Sympathy. And understanding. Howard stood and walked around to the front of the desk until he was standing beside Owen.
“I had no idea you felt like this,” he said softly.
“I’ve been telling people I didn’t want to go on the trip ever since I was appointed,” Owen reminded him.
“Yes, but…I think we all felt it was because you were just uncomfortable with the expectations. No one suspected—at least I didn’t—that you felt this strongly about going.”
Owen met his gaze almost defiantly. “Well, I do.”
Howard nodded. “I can see that.”
“So what happens now?”
Crossing his arms, Howard sighed. “Unfortunately, it’s not for me to decide. I can put in a recommendation to see about someone replacing you, but—”
“But what?”
“It’s not my place,” Howard said.
“What’s not your place?”
“Owen, I know it took a lot for you to come here today and tell me all of this. And I respect you for doing so. But I also know I’m a pretty safe bet.”
Safe bet? What did that even mean? “I’m confused.”
“You know you can come to me at any time and I’m going to listen to you and try to help in any way I can. We’re not just colleagues, we’re friends, right?”
Owen nodded.
“You know I’m not going to judge you, and I’m certainly not going to get angry with you for speaking your mind, right?”
Another nod.
“Then, as your friend, I feel you should know that if you want out of this project—if you honestly believe you cannot do it to the best of your ability—then you need to plead your own case.”
Owen jumped to his feet. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me. If you can stand here and express how you feel about the project and the entire process, then you should be able to go to the faculty and talk to them as well. It will mean more coming directly from you. Although…”
Great. Now what? “Although what?” Owen asked.
Waving him off, Howard walked back around his desk and sat down. “It’s nothing. Just promise me you’ll think about it.”
He was dumbfounded. When did the world suddenly decide to go topsy-turvy? Quinn was giving good advice, and Howard was giving bad? How was that even possible? This had to be a bad dream because, for the life of him, Owen couldn’t make a damn bit of sense out of any of it.
Okay, maybe he could. It wasn’t as if Howard was giving bad advice, per se. He just wasn’t giving the advice Owen wanted to hear.
Unable to make himself leave, he stared at his friend, his mentor, and frowned. “So you’re saying you’re not going to help me with this.”
“If you’re looking for someone to be a sounding board for you, I’m here. If you’re looking for someone to do your dirty work for you…” He paused. “Well, that isn’t me.”
Unfortunately, he knew Howard had a point. It wasn’t fair for Owen to ask Howard to fight his battles. No matter how badly he wanted to. With nothing left to say, Owen gave a curt nod and turned to leave. “I understand.” He was at the door once again when Howard said his name. “Yes?” Owen replied softly, almost afraid to turn around.
“I’m sorry.”
And so was Owen. He nodded again with a murmured word of thanks.
“About everything,” Howard added. When Owen didn’t move except to place a hand on the doorframe, Howard added, “I never should have pushed you on this. I hope you can forgive me.”
“I do,” Owen said as he walked out the door.
* * *
Brooke happily made her way down the hall toward the faculty offices for her lunch date with her uncle. Between her classes and painting, she had been doing a lot of research on the meteor shower and thinking of ways she could assist Owen on the trip—should he ever ask her—that she had missed spending time with Howard. So, that morning, she had suggested getting together for lunch as he was leaving for work. Part of her wondered if Owen was lecturing today, and she considered taking a slight detour past his classroom but opted to go to see her uncle first.
Maybe she’d stop and surprise Owen after lunch and see if he wanted to go to a gallery with her tonight. She had texted him a couple of times over the past week—just saying hi or asking how his day was—and she had sat in on two more of his classes, but they hadn’t spent any time alone since the previous week. And she found she missed him.
“Knock, knock,” she sang as she tapped on her uncle’s office door. He looked up at her with a smile, but she could instantly tell something was wrong. “Hey, is everything okay?”
Howard stood up and came around the desk to hug her. “I’m fine.” He paused and then stepped back. “So where should we go for lunch?”
“Uncle Howard,” she admonished. “I can tell something’s the matter. It might make you feel better to talk about it.”
He took her hand and squeezed it. “We’ll talk at lunch. For now, why don’t you tell me about your day.”
She knew a diversion when she heard one but decided not to fight him on it. “Considering it’s only a little after noon, there’s not much to tell.” She paused. “That’s not true. I actually did quite a bit.”
They were walking down the hall, and Howard chuckled. “Okay, now I’m intrigued. Di
d you paint something spectacular?”
Blushing, she shook her head and laughed with him. “Hardly. I spent the morning doing some research on the Eta Aquarid meteor shower.”
“Really? And what brought that on?”
Brooke nudged him with her shoulder playfully. “Well, if I do end up going to Red Rock with Owen, it would be beneficial to know more about it. I’ve been reading up on it quite a bit. My mind wanders a lot, so I’m a slow study. And I know it’s important, not only so I can talk to the students but so I can also start thinking about my paintings and what I might expect. It never hurts to get a little knowledge beforehand and hope it leads to inspiration.”
Howard smiled as they continued to walk out of the building and toward the parking lot.
“I thought we’d just walk to lunch,” Brooke suggested. “There are a lot of places close by. That is, if you don’t mind walking.”
“Not at all,” he said, still seeming a little distracted. “The fresh air will do me good.”
Okay, she thought, something was definitely up. Maybe she could cheer him up with a little astronomy talk. Or at least her weak attempt at it.
“So…you want to hear what my research taught me today?” she asked playfully.
“Absolutely,” he replied, his smile never wavering.
“Okay, but just remember, I’m not as eloquent with it as you and Owen are. I memorized just the basic facts.”
He nodded.
They made their way across campus, and Brooke decided she’d give him a quick overview and then they’d choose where they wanted to eat. “Well, the Eta Aquarids is an above-average shower, and it can produce up to sixty meteors per hour at its peak. The best place to view it is in the Southern Hemisphere. Well, that’s actually where you’ll see more activity. Not necessarily better viewings, just more.”
Howard nodded and said, “That’s right.”
He didn’t seem quite as impressed as she’d hoped, but she went on. “However, you can see up to thirty meteors an hour in the Northern Hemisphere. This particular shower is from the dust particles left behind by Halley’s Comet. This is an annual event seen from mid-April to mid-May. The best way to view the shower is from a dark location after midnight.”
Howard chuckled as they crossed the street. “Well done, Brooke. You weren’t kidding when you said you memorized some facts.”
“Wait…I have one more,” she said proudly. “Although the meteors can be seen anywhere in the sky, they actually radiate from Aquarius.” She stopped and took a small bow. “And now I’m done.”
Laughing, Howard stood beside her and clapped. “You did a great job.” They continued walking along with the throngs of people.
“Thank you. Not that I’m ready to hold my own with a group of astrophysicists, but I have to admit it might be nice to have at least a basic level of understanding of what’s going on and a couple of facts tucked away to pull out if needed.”
When her uncle didn’t respond, Brooke got a sinking sensation in her belly.
She wasn’t going to Red Rock.
Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry, she chanted to herself.
Softly, she cleared her throat and willed away the tears as she looked around. “So…um…how about that hot dog place you’ve been bragging about?”
Howard came to an abrupt halt. “You want hot dogs for lunch? You’re always telling me you don’t like them and all the reasons why I shouldn’t eat them.”
Shrugging, she did her best to smile. “Sometimes a girl just wants some junk food. Are you saying you don’t want them?”
“Huh? Uh…no. No. That’s not what I’m saying at all. I was just trying to give you an out if you want it.”
“I’m good.”
They walked in silence for the two blocks to Howard’s favorite lunch haunt. At the counter, Brooke told her uncle to get her whatever he was having while she went and grabbed a booth for them. To be honest, she was happy to have a few minutes to herself. As she sat, she realized she was shaking. Damn it.
What happened? For days Brooke had been marveling at how great she and Owen had gotten along—how they’d just…clicked. How could she have possibly been so wrong?
Deep breaths, she reminded herself. There was a chance she was misreading the situation—the current one with her uncle. Maybe he wasn’t going to tell her she wasn’t going to work with Owen at Red Rock. Maybe something else was bothering him.
Then she immediately shook that off. Other than her parents, there was no one she was closer to than her uncle. And just like she could never hide anything from him, there wasn’t anything he could hide from her. At least he never had before.
And she kind of hoped this time was going to be the first.
“Okay,” Howard said as he slid into the booth across from her, “you are in for a treat. I got you a traditional Chicago-style hot dog, a side of fries, and a Coke.” He placed the plate of food in front of her along with her drink and then set up his own food before sliding the plastic tray to the side.
Brooke studied the mess of food in front of her with a combination of dread and curiosity. “Um…what exactly am I eating?” she asked with a nervous chuckle.
“That, my dear, is a classic Chicago-style hot dog—also known as a Chicago dog or Chicago red hot. It’s an all-beef frankfurter on a poppy seed bun, and it originated right here in the city of Chicago. Hence the name. It’s topped with yellow mustard, chopped white onions, sweet pickle relish, a dill pickle spear, tomato wedges, pickled sport peppers, and a dash of celery salt. Trust me when I say it is a feast for your taste buds.”
Somehow she doubted that. “Um…back home we do it with sauerkraut, spicy brown mustard, and onions in red sauce. I’m not sure how I’m supposed to eat this. Do I cut it up or…?”
“Watch and learn,” he said, picking up his hot dog and taking a giant bite out of it. The look of pure joy on his face made Brooke smile. When he finished chewing, he motioned for Brooke to pick hers up. “Go ahead. Try it!”
To say that she had made a huge error in suggesting this place for lunch was an understatement. Other than the hot dog and bun, there wasn’t anything else on there Brooke would eat—at least not together like this. Looking up she saw that her uncle was watching her expectantly, and she figured he wasn’t going to take another bite of his own lunch until she tried hers.
“Okay,” she said hesitantly. “Here goes nothing.” The hot dog was awkward to handle, and she took a minute to figure out how she was going to even take one complete bite because the damn thing was so big and cluttered with toppings. Finally, she thought screw it and took a bite and… “Holy crap! That’s good!”
Howard laughed out loud with pleasure. “I knew it! I knew you’d like it!” Then he took another bite of his sandwich, and all was quiet until they were done. He was wiping his hands with a paper napkin when he spoke again. “Now that I’ve introduced you to some of Chicago’s finest cuisine, is it fair to say we can come here again?”
“We definitely can,” she agreed. “I cannot believe how much I enjoyed that. It’s certainly not an easy thing to eat—it’s incredibly messy but well worth it.”
“Excellent! I knew if you gave it a chance you’d like it. Now don’t get me wrong, I enjoy a New York hot dog just like everyone else, but there is something about a Chicago dog that is just…well, it’s more like an experience than just a meal.”
Brooke laughed. “I don’t know if I’d go that far, but it was very good.” She took a sip of her drink before growing serious. “So what’s going on, Uncle Howard? You looked a little…distracted when I arrived at your office earlier. Is everything all right?”
And right before her eyes, his expression seemed to close. Gone was the happiness of just moments ago, and his shoulders slumped.
“I had a visit from Owen this morning.”
Damn i
t. For once it didn’t feel good to be right. Fiddling with her napkin, she let her gaze drop to the table. “Oh? Did you give him those contracts you mentioned the other day?” It seemed like a good way to let him break the news to her gently. Although maybe it would be better to rip the Band-Aid off quickly.
“He doesn’t want to look at the contracts,” he replied sadly. Brooke looked up at his tone. Howard shrugged. “Owen seems to feel like he’s done traveling so much. He wants to find one university to teach and study and work at and cut back on the lecture tours.”
“And that’s upsetting to you…why?” she asked curiously.
It took a moment for Howard to speak again. “I see a lot of myself in Owen. When I was his age, I was an extreme introvert.”
Brooke couldn’t help but smile. “I still can’t picture that. You were never like that around us.”
“You’re family. Family is like a safe zone. It’s comforting and familiar and easy to relax around them. But once I was at work and back here in Chicago, I was a different person. I wasn’t comfortable in my own skin.” He chuckled. “Isn’t that how you described Owen?”
She nodded.
“Anyway, I remember going to a conference in California. San Diego. I didn’t want to go and did everything I could to get out of it. I argued with all of my colleagues about the validity of making a conference mandatory. After months of carrying on, I finally accepted the assignment. But in my mind, I knew I was going to hate it—every moment of it.”
“What was the conference about?”
“It was on theoretical astrophysics,” he replied.
Brooke just nodded because she had a feeling the description would be way over her head. “And you didn’t think it was necessary?”
“Of course not!” he laughed. “I thought I knew it all. I still do sometimes.” He shrugged. “The thought of going across the country and having to stay at a hotel with a bunch of people I didn’t know was beyond unappealing. But in the end I went.”
One More Kiss Page 37
