“Lane doesn’t want to become a rancher like Matt?”
“We don’t know; he doesn’t, either. We’ll let. him make his own choice about what he’ll do and where. Nothing makes a person more miserable than being forced to do something they don’t love and respect.”
Beth wondered if Jessica’s words referred to more than her son.
“If you’re finished, Lance, why don’t you play in your room with your toys? Miss Beth and I will be right here working if you need me.”
“Yes, Mama.”
Jessica washed his face and hands and helped him from the chair. Her adoring gaze followed the child until he was out of sight.
Beth heard his footsteps on the wooden stairs. “He’s precious. I can’t wait until we have one like him.” She laughed and refuted, “Yes, I can. I hope it’s a ways off to give us time alone and time to get established.”
“You love children, don’t you?” Jessica watched her nod. “You’re good with them. I’m sure you two will make wonderful parents.”
Beth reasoned the woman might wonder why “Elizabeth Lawrence” didn’t have any children after being married for several years, so she asserted, “I hope I don’t have trouble getting pregnant when the moment comes. I lost two babies before they could be born when I was married to Stephen. The doctor said I was fine and the losses were nothing more than results of accidents. We crashed in a runaway carriage the first time and I took a bad fall during the second one. He said not to worry.”
“I’m sure everything will be fine for you and Navarro. I’ve often heard of such things happening. I had a hard time with my first child, especially problems with his birth. Matt delivered Lane and saved our lives because the doctor couldn’t get here. Mary Louise, my sister, had difficulty conceiving; her husband’s a doctor and there was nothing he could do to solve their problem. She and John were about to give up hope when she got pregnant; now, they have a passel of children.”
“That’s encouraging news.” Except in my particular case.
“Beth…”
The agent’s curiosity was piqued when Jessica paused. “Yes?”
“It’s none of my business, and I won’t mind if you say so, but…”
“What is it, Jessica? You can tell me and I won’t be offended.”
“If you haven’t told Navarro that fear, I’d keep it to myself for a while, just in case it takes you a long time to conceive. You don’t want him to worry about you and having children while you’re still getting close and starting a new life together. Men can be…sensitive about such matters if they want a child of their own badly. When a man Navarro’s age settles down, he wants everything fast—wife, home, children, and success—because he waited so long to get them. I guess it has to do with male pride, fear of losing their…virility, afraid of failing you and himself, and having no heir.”
“You’re right; it’ll be our secret for a while. If the doctor hadn’t assured me I’m fine, I would have told Navarro the truth before we wed.”
“I think you did the best thing for both of you, so don’t worry.”
“I’ll keep praying and believing. Thanks for the advice.” But why do you look and sound so…concerned and mysterious over our future baby? Is it because you want him locked “firmly into his new existence”? I can’t blame you for wanting to protect all you have from trouble.
They cleared the table, washed and dried dishes, cleaned and put on two hens to boil, and did some light housekeeping. Jessica told Beth that after the fowl cooked and cooled, she’d remove the meat to make chicken and dumplings for supper. As they worked and Lance played in his room, they chatted about many things.
“You must be very skilled, Jessica, for your father to have let you take on that gunslinger mission all by yourself.”
“I didn’t start out without help; I had a big, strong hand with me. He was killed in an accident on the trail. I buried him with rocks and took off.”
As they finished in the kitchen, Beth gazed at the dainty female. “So you continued alone?”
“I had to; I was too close to town and we needed help bad. It was silly to return home because none of the other hands could be spared. I cut the top and sides of my hair short, then hid the rest of it with my hat. Banded my breasts—what little I had then—dirtied my face to mask my sex, disguised my voice, and kept my head ducked, never looked anybody in the eye. I’d lived with and as a male for so long it was easy to play one. I searched the town and checked the saloons because San Angelo was a known hangout for gunslingers. Those kind of men have a crazy streak of loyalty to men who hire them and fierce pride in jobs they take on. I was scared and nervous, but I was careful and alert. Still got into trouble.” She laughed.
After hearing those facts, Beth concluded Jessica Lane Cordell would have made a clever agent. If Navarro had been with the Agency long ago and she’d taken off with him, they would have been an excellent team. With haste, she dismissed that intrusive thought. “What happened?” she asked, making sure she sounded curious.
Jessica used a damp cloth over a homemade brushbroom to clean the wood floors. “I was questioning a saloon girl when one of the town’s bullies took offense when she tried to get rid of him and stay at the table with me. Before that drunk arrived, I ran into some scary moments convincing her I didn’t want her upstairs services. It’s funny now, but, at that time, I had to do some fast and clever talking not to insult her or expose my identity.”
While Beth dusted furniture, she laughed and said, “I imagine so. Yep, you’d have to be cunning and quick to outwit them as you did.”
“That brute wouldn’t settle down. He attacked me, yanked me right out of my chair, and roughed me up. I was lucky Navarro arrived and rescued me ‘cause nobody else would challenge any of the Adams boys. I’m sure he’s told you about his childhood troubles, so you can understand why that incident with the young boy he took me for provoked him to intrude.”
She saw Beth nod. “I must confess: Navarro looked like the tallest, bravest, and handsomest man I’d seen when he stepped between me and that huge beast. He tried to talk Adams out of a fight, but it didn’t work. I couldn’t believe anybody would go against a man who looked, moved, and spoke like Navarro in the old days. Adams was a cocky fool and drew on him. I’ve never seen any man clear leather as fast and easy as Navarro.” Jessica smiled and said, “I guess you could say, I knew I’d found my man.”
In more than one way. So, you were smitten and fascinated by him the first time you met, just as I was. I’ll bet Navarro has that arresting effect on all women. With little effort, he could win any female he desires, except the only one he loves and wants.
“You married a special man, Beth. You’ll always be safe with him.”
“You’re right, and thanks. Was it hard to persuade him to take your job? I mean, with him being a fugitive on the run.”
“That’s why he finally agreed, but he said no at first. That saloon girl told us we’d better git pronto ‘cause Adams had mean brothers. We didn’t hang around to see if she was right. Turned out, she was. News traveled swift and they came after us and attacked. Navarro tried again to talk his way out of a gun battle with about as much success as he’d had with their brother. Even in his old days, Beth, he didn’t kill unless he wasn’t given a choice. Anyway, he was wounded and I saved his life, so he thought he owed me, least he used that excuse to accept my offer.”
Jessica worked her way into the dining room with Beth following. “I believe he accepted because I saved his hide and because I promised him food, shelter, a new horse, and good pay; and because Fletcher sounded like a worthy challenge to him, a mean bastard like his father. I didn’t learn the truth until he had to leave. By then, we were friends, so he trusted me with the real reasons he’d come and couldn’t stay. He did far more for us than just fight Fletcher. We hated to see him go; he was one of the best hands we’d had, put him to hard labor on branding the day he arrived.”
I’ll bet his confes
sion and loss were hard on you, so you turned to Matt for comfort. I’ll bet you never expected or planned to fall in love with your foreman, or your hired gunman. I wonder what happened between you and Navarro during that long ride home with you doctoring him… “I imagine he was shocked to learn you were a girl, a young woman.”
Jessica filled the room with merry laughter. “He was. Angry, too.”
“Angry? Why?”
“Because Papa had let a tiny female go after a dangerous gunslinger. Since I was in big trouble when we met, Navarro didn’t think a woman could protect herself or be as good as a man at anything.”
“But you proved him wrong in a hurry after he got shot. I’m sure you won his respect and friendship fast. He was lucky he found you at a time when he desperately needed help and friends.”
“I don’t believe Navarro was ever a bad man; he’d just had bad luck for a long time and too much of it. Once he was in good surroundings with good people, he had a chance to let the real Navarro surface. After he did, there was no going back to his old self and existence. He’s proven that by how he’s lived and the way he is now. He was always searching and hungering for peace, respect, acceptance, and love—even though he’d denied such yearnings to himself. It’s hard for a man born and raised like he was to give free rein to his feelings. You’ll be good for him, Beth, and I doubt you’ll ever regret loving him and marrying him. I’m overjoyed to see him so happy and relaxed; and I’m proud we played even a small part in bringing about such changes for him.”
You know him well. “So am I, since he’s settling down with me.”
As they did tasks upstairs, they continued their genial chat. Jessica related her normal routine for the day, week, and each season. She spoke of gardening for daily food consumption and canning extras for winter. She gave suggestions about drying, curing, or pickling items such as fruits, meats, vegetables, berries, and spices. She talked about churning milk into butter, making soap and emergency candles, keeping the wood box loaded for cooking, sewing, and washing and ironing, tending sick or injured animals as well as children, and helping with ranch work when necessary. Jessica cautioned her not to let chores and children “keep you from giving your husband plenty of time and attention because he’ll still be around after young’uns are grown and gone.” During the ten years she had been married, she said she’d made certain she kept romance alive, their relationship exciting and fulfilling, and communication flowing freely.
Beth realized the woman had wed Matt very shortly after Navarro’s departure. Had a love-blinded Navarro been mistaken about Jessica’s feelings? No, Navarro had told her Jessica promised to wait for him. So why hadn’t she, at least for a longer period? Jessica didn’t strike her as being cruel and devious, nor a vixen who would dally with a man’s affections. Perhaps, Beth mused, she had recoiled after Navarro was compelled to abandon her. But why hadn’t she just thrown herself into ranch work and her family while she healed? Yet, the union with Matt had succeeded; they were happy and in love. The contradictions in words and timing baffled Beth. It was as if a vital puzzle piece was missing.
After Lance went to sleep, the women began to debone and demeat the chickens. “He gets up so early that he’s sleepy by one. I’m so glad he still takes naps. It gives me time to do chores faster, especially gardening and ironing. Things are a little different at present. Some of the hands are pitching in to help with chores while we entertain our visitors. Matt told you Charles is coming soon.”
“I’ll bet you two are elated about his visit after being separated for so long. We should go when he arrives to give you privacy for the reunion.”
“That isn’t necessary. You two must stay, at least until Wednesday. That’ll leave you time to reach San Antonio for your appointments.”
“Must stay?” “But—”
“You don’t have to cut short your visit because of him.”
“Cut shortyour visit?” “Is something wrong, Jessica? Don’t you like Charles? Aren’t you looking forward to seeing him?”
“I don’t know Charles, never met him, never had the chance.”
“You don’t look or sound as if you want to, either.”
“To be honest, Beth, I don’t. I’m angry with him,” Jessica began, then halted to glance out back and front to make sure they had privacy.
Chapter Fourteen
Beth halted the work on her hen and looked at her companion. She queried the reason for Jessica’s unexpected words and mood.
“He’s the one who sent those diseased bulls to us. This ranch has faced all kinds of perils and hardships but we’ve always been able to defeat them. That evil predator was unlike anything that’s attacked us. There was no way to fight it, Beth; we were helpless, almost destroyed. If we’d been in deep debt, everything we own and have worked for would be gone.”
Sounds as if she wants to talk. Draw her out slowly and carefully. “Matt’s brother is responsible? He’s the…‘friend’ Matt mentioned?” Beth read sadness mingled with anger in Jessica’s gaze as she nodded; then, a gleam of distrust filled those heavenly blue eyes.
“He’s never sent the children or us anything in the past. When he finally gets a very tardy ‘generous’ streak, this is the result!”
From the corner of her eye, she watched Jessica frown, yank pieces of fowl from a chicken’s thigh, then toss the bone in a refuse pan. The woman’s knee bumped the cabinet in a rhythmical cadence that indicated agitation. Go easy, Beth. “Matt must feel terrible, since it’s his brother.”
“He does, but he won’t blame Charles. He says it was an accident because Charles supposedly doesn’t know anything about cattle and their diseases. Matt knows now he should have kept them separated from our stock for a while. Only a week would have changed everything! But he was so excited about having a breed no one else did that he couldn’t wait to see if our cows showed any interest in the new boys and see how the new ones mingled and got along with our herd. From all the glowing things Charles wrote him about those blasted beasts, Matt was like a child at Christmas with a new toy. When Charles said it would make the L/C Ranch prosperous, Matt believed him; it was his brother talking, and Charles had been everywhere, seen and done everything, to hear him tell it. Well, he certainly didn’t know everything, or we wouldn’t be in this mess! Matt feels so awful about his mistake, I haven’t mentioned my worries to him. I don’t want to hurt him and shame him by telling him what I really think.”
“Worries?” Sounds like suspicions to me. Beth knew from all she’d learned that Jessica wasn’t a coward or a weakling, nor did she appear to have lost faith in or respect for Matt; she was being compassionate and protective of her love. “I think you’re right to keep silent, at least a while longer, like you advised me to hold quiet about having children. Men’s pride can be enormous and difficult to handle at times, particularly when they make an error or one involves their family or a close friend. The animal doctor couldn’t do anything to stop that disease’s rampage?”
“He’d never seen rinderpest and knew nothing about it. He’s sort of a self-trained doc, no real schooling in medicine. As Matt said, he thinks it’s a foreign strain of hoof-and-mouth, and that’s what he told the Cattlemen’s Association. We haven’t confessed the truth, and that’s probably terrible of us. If there was any risk to other ranchers, we would, honestly. They’ve been warned not to import stock so that should be enough to protect them. If they learn it’s a new disease to our country, we would be avoided worse than that evil plague. We can’t risk losing everything, Beth, we just can’t.”
“Don’t worry, Jessica, we won’t mention it to anyone. The threat is over and you’ve done your duty to others, so you mustn’t feel guilty. You two have suffered and lost more than your share, so you made a wise decision. How did you discover it was this…mysterious rinderpest?”
“After Matt telegraphed Charles with the bad news, Charles wrote and enlightened us. Said he’d checked out the problem with the seller. But he asked us n
ot to tell anyone, warned it might cause us more trouble and start a panic if the Association and other ranchers learned the truth. He said the seller told him we had dealt with the matter in the only way possible and the disease had been conquered and wouldn’t return. So far, it hasn’t. It may have been foolish and selfish, but we took his word. He must have told the truth because every sign of it has vanished.”
Beth noticed that Charles “wrote” and didn’t telegraph his response. “I’m sorry it didn’t work out as Matt hoped. I know it must have broken your hearts to watch your cattle suffer and die by the hundreds.”
“Thousands, Beth, by the thousands. I don’t know if I’ll ever forget this horror or forgive Charles. I hate the thought of him coming into our home and onto our land after what he’s done to us, what he’s cost us.”
“Matt hinted that Charles is going to settle up with him over the loss. Is his brother a rich man? Can he repair such heavy damage?”
As she put the hen’s carcass aside, Jessica said, “I don’t know. He wrote he has a big surprise for Matt that will solve our problems.”
“But you don’t know what that ‘surprise’ is and you don’t trust him, right?” Jessica nodded. “Has Charles given you any reason to doubt him?”
“Not really. It’s just that…”
“Just that what, Jessica? Since he’s Matt’s brother, I understand why you don’t want to discuss any misgivings with him. But you can trust me. Let me help you like you helped my Navarro.”
Jessica almost flung the hunks of meat into the broth pot. “It’s just strange that Charles would suddenly send us such an expensive gift. I mean, he only writes Matt every few years and he’s never been to see us. He doesn’t even know what his sister-in-law, nephews, and niece look like! He’s never even asked Matt to meet him somewhere for a visit.”
Beth watched Jessica wash her greasy hands, then lean over to fetch a flour container to make the dumplings. As she straightened and grasped the tuffed end of a thick auburn plait to toss it back over her shoulder, Beth murmured, “That does seem odd. But perhaps this Charles is simply an odd person. Why not wait until you meet him to decide if you like him and believe him? I know it’s easier for me to form an accurate opinion about somebody in person. Looking into eyes and listening to a voice usually tell me if a person is being honest and sincere.”
Chase The Wind Page 29