by Jon Jacks
Jial was like Chrissy’s little sister. She couldn’t imagine a life without her. Truth was, she even dreaded growing older, for that would mean that Jial would finally leave, no matter how much Chrissy wanted her to stay.
How had any of the adults handled such a loss? No one would ever say.
‘It’s…it’s private,’ they would say whenever you asked them. ‘Something we all have to deal with in our own way. There’s no magical formula for dealing with it.’
But for an angel to leave you before you felt you were ready, before you even felt that you were now an adult? Could there be anything more incredibly painful?
Chrissy had only been apart from Jial for a few hours, but the agony she was feeling was increasing every minute that she was away. She had never felt so lonely, vulnerable and confused.
‘Jial, where are you Jial?’ Chrissy edgily muttered once more.
Alongside her, there was an abrupt fluttering of wings.
‘It’s okay Chrissy, I’m here, I’m back!’ Jial declared with a beatific smile.
They immediately reached out for each other, drawing themselves into an eagerly welcoming embrace.
‘I was beginning to think I’d lost you!’ Chrissy sighed with relief, only just managing to hold back the tears she felt welling up in her eyes. ‘It was so odd, you not being here with me!’
‘I told you I’d be back!’ Jial chuckled, giving Chrissy an extra tight hug before they parted at last and stepped away from each other.
‘What about Si? What about Zorbielle?’ Chrissy urgently asked, even though she was actually thinking more of Emma and Petrial rather than the more resigned Si. ‘Will he be back?’
Jial’s smile vanished. She shook her head sadly.
‘No, but Zorbielle…Zorbielle simply felt that Simon might be ready to get by without him.’
Chrissy knew Jial well enough to know her slight hesitation meant she didn’t really believe what she was saying. Was she lying? Or was that what she herself had been told, and she was merely repeating it? Was it, even, that she believed she was protecting Chrissy from the more frightening truth – that Zorbielle’s disappearance hadn’t been expected even by the angels?
‘I know that look, Chrissy!’ Jial said, her grin instantly returning. ‘You think I’m holding something back! Go on – what is it?’
‘Well, you didn’t sound much like you believed it yourself, for one thing! For another, Si’s not much older than I am! Are you saying he’s much more of an adult than I am?’
Chrissy put on a stern, aggrieved face.
Jial, almost like a reflection, put on an equally shocked expression.
‘Are you saying you don’t want me around anymore? That you can manage without me after all, thank you very much?’
Now Chrissy was genuinely upset and shocked.
‘No, no! Of course not Jial!’
She took Jial into a fierce clinch once more, relishing the warmth and comfort of her huge wings as they reassuringly enveloped them both.
‘You know I love you! That I couldn’t live without you!’
As she said it, Chrissy recalled that Emma had declared exactly the same thing. What had Emma’s relationship to Petrial been like? Had they also regarded each other as sisters?
‘Petrial,’ Chrissy murmured, now looking directly into Jial’s eyes. ‘Petrial’s vanished too.’
‘Yes, yes, I know.’
Chrissy felt Jial’s chest rise and fall in a deeply resigned sigh.
‘It…it’s the same thing,’ Jial said, her eyes closing as she spoke. ‘The same thing as Zorbielle’s disappearance.’
Chrissy moved back a little.
‘Emma’s younger than I am, Jial. Are you really saying that both her and Si don’t need their angels anymore? Yeah, okay; so Si seems pretty happy about it all – like he’s suddenly free to do all sorts of things he must have been thinking he’s been denied up till now. But Emma; she’s as miserable as I’d be if you left me.’
‘If…if she feels that way, it might be that she – and perhaps even Si too, if it looks like he’s suddenly going to start misbehaving! – it might be that new angels are appointed to–’
‘New angels?’ Chrissy was aghast. ‘But Emma wants Petrial back. Not some new angel! I thought we got to choose our angels? Not the other way round, where someone tells us which angels will be looking after us!’
‘Perhaps…perhaps Petrial could come back, after a while.’ Jial sounded unsure. She slightly turned away and hung her head, as if ashamed, or at least avoiding Chrissy’s eyes. ‘Things have changed, Chrissy. Everything can’t be as it was, I’m afraid.’
And as Chrissy saw a tear fall to the floor, she at last realised why Jial had turned away.
*
Chapter 9
The next morning, Chrissy’s dad looked worried.
The Sunday newspaper hadn’t been delivered.
Chrissy couldn’t understand why he was making such an amazing fuss about it. He only ever just glanced through it, like he wasn’t really bothered about what was going on in the world, but was just going through the motions of pretending to be interested. Even so, he quickly called on the neighbours, nervously asking them if they’d had their papers delivered, receiving an equally anxious ‘No’ from every one of them.
Why was it such a big deal? Chrissy wondered.
Who in town really cared what was going on in the rest of the world, unless it was the latest music, movies, books or fashions? (Or, of course, when it came to people like herself, the kind of nightlife and amazing things to do that the school kids of Hermon could only dream about.) Hermon’s council often cited what the rest of the world was doing as a reason why they’d be doing the complete opposite: for the good of the town’s populace, of course; for the sake of a peaceful, law-abiding life; for a more morally upstanding and rewarding way of living.
In many ways, Chrissy had to agree, the town council was right in taking this stance. There was little crime in Hermon, most cases being nothing more than a minor traffic violation, or someone mistakenly taking something from a shop without paying. Crimes that could be resolved with no more erroneous punishment than a stern talking to.
Not even the police were allowed or needed to carry weapons. The only guns she had ever seen were those in movies. The only knives those used in cooking. Even in the school’s cookery classes, the knives were treated as items to be handled with utmost care, counted out as they were handed round, counted once more as they were collected and locked away in their drawers.
Everyone in Hermon was perfectly safe. If more than a little bored.
Chrissy left the house with a sigh of relief. Even though her dad had tried to hide it, going about his regular Sunday chores of cleaning out the garage and clearing up the garden, Chrissy thought he still seemed a little jumpy: particularly when she’d come across him a number of times making whispered phone calls.
Chrissy had almost made the mistake of telling her father that a far more important thing to worry about than disappearing newspapers were vanishing angels. Thankfully, she’d stopped herself just in time when she remembered Si’s parents had said no one else should be told.
Yes, she felt awful hiding something like that from her parents; but a promise was a promise, wasn’t it?
‘Hmn, it’s an odd promise to hold you to; though, yeah, I can understand they don’t want everyone knowing just yet,’ Jial had murmured doubtfully when Chrissy explained why she wasn’t telling her parents what had happened (leaving out the extra detail that Si’s parents had also insisted that Jial wasn’t to know they hadn’t informed the council). Jial had been persuaded even less by Chrissy’s argument that the promise meant she couldn’t even mention Petrial’s disappearance; ‘Well, in a way, Jial, I’m revealing that, you know, angels are disappearing, and that might lead to questioning by Mom and Dad that leads me into mentioning Zorbielle.’
‘Still, I suppose the promise has created a bit of a moral p
roblem for you,’ Jial had conceded doubtfully. ‘We’ll have to insist Si releases you from such an unfair promise; tell him it means you can’t speak honestly with your mum and dad.’
Chrissy had almost chuckled at Jial’s earnestness; it was just so unlike her! But that very same earnest frown dissuaded Chrissy from making fun of her.
Besides, as far as Chrissy was aware, Zorbielle and Petrial were still missing, despite Jial’s claim that they might return. It was hardly a situation to treat lightly.
Emma was still mortified that Petrial had disappeared, despite Chrissy calling her again the previous night to tell her that Jial believed it might only be a temporary separation. Emma had, of course, been grateful for Chrissy’s call. When she’d asked for more definite details, however, Chrissy hadn’t been able to answer, as Jial herself had refused to explain further, regardless of Chrissy’s own repeated questioning.
Chrissy had arranged to meet Emma on the green lying more or less half way between her own house and Si’s. That way, she’d reasoned, she wouldn’t miss Si if he’d decided to call on her. It turned out to be a good decision on her part, as a hugely-grinning Si was already striding up her street towards her.
‘Hardly looks like he’s even the teensiest bit concerned that poor Zorbielle just vanished just like that, does he?’ Jial puckered her lips peevishly, slipping back into little sister mode.
Before Chrissy could reply, Si yelled out to her.
‘Let me guess! The big news of today is that there is no news?’
He chuckled, as if he’d been enjoying himself all morning watching flustered adults rushing around looking for their missing newspapers.
‘You too?’ Chrissy’s yell was a little softer than Si’s, as they were drawing closer. ‘I thought it might be Gary – the boy who delivers our papers – being poorly or something. I’d heard Dad on the phone to the shop. But he went all weirdly quiet and nervous as soon as he saw I could hear him.’
‘Nope, it’s not the delivery boy’s fault. There’s been no papers delivered from out of town.’
‘So? It means a truck’s broken down, or something, yeah? I can’t understand why everyone’s acting like it’s the nearest thing to a terrorist attack on Hermon!’
‘Tell me about it! To be fair on Mom and Pop, though, they’ve hardly bothered about it; like they’ve got their minds more fixed on Zorbielle’s disappearance, and what to do about it.’
‘Nice to see someone’s concerned!’ Jial glared at Si, even though he couldn’t possibly be aware of her sarcastic response. ‘I take it they’ve told the council?’
Chrissy knew she should answer Jial’s question – but she was still compromised by that promise, right? Si didn’t want even Jial to know that his parents had decided no one should be informed of Zorbielle’s disappearance, least of all the council.
She felt odd hiding things from Jial. She had never, ever, had to hide anything from her. She felt like it was a betrayal of her most trusted friend.
She wasn’t proud of herself. She felt, rather, incredibly ashamed.
Incredibly vulnerable.
To avoid answering Jial, Chrissy made out she was responding to the anxiety of Si’s parents over the loss of Zorbielle.
‘Jial reckons Zorbielle could come back,’ she said to Si. ‘Petrial too! Oh yeah, sorry; I haven’t had chance to tell you. Petrial, Emma’s angel, has vanished too!’
‘Hmn, so it’s not just me?’
Chrissy shook her head.
‘Emma’s taken it an awful lot harder than you have though. I said I’d meet her on the green; have a talk with her.’
Si looked worried.
‘You haven’t mentioned that Zorbie–’
‘Course I haven’t Si! I made a promise, didn’t I?’
‘Tell him you need releasing from that promise!’ Jial urged. ‘It’s causing trouble between you and your mom and dad!’
Once again Chrissy ignored Jial, this time by pretending to be distracted by Si who, oblivious to Jial’s presence, was speaking over her.
‘Good, good,’ Si said with satisfaction. ‘Sure, have a chat with Emma. But please don’t mention Zorbielle, Chrissy! It is an odd feeling, being without your angel, I’ll give her that. I can understand why she might be upset! To be honest, even I’m not taking it all as easily as you probably think I am. You can’t have a relationship like that suddenly ending without it affecting you. I’m just accepting it as a part of my growing up; plus, of course, all the amazing freedom it’s given me!’
He pronounced ‘freedom’ like a character in a movie who’d just broken free of prison.
Jial glowered.
‘Freedom isn’t such a great thing if you’re not sure what to do with it or, worse, you end up doing the wrong things! Poor Zorbielle was only there to act as an extra conscience, to help Si make the right choices! The council need to know Si’s no longer receiving adequate guidance. Has his mom and dad told them of Zorbielle’s disappearance?’
Chrissy realised she couldn’t ignore Jial any longer without it becoming obvious that it was deliberate.
‘Jial’s asking if you’ve told the council that Zorbielle’s gone,’ she said to Si.
‘She took a long time to say something that simple, Chrissy,’ Si cynically chuckled.
He had patiently waited while Chrissy had listened to Jial’s complaint, even though it had looked to him as if Chrissy had been doing nothing but stare into empty space.
‘I bet she was having a little rant about me being free as a bird too, wasn’t she?’
‘Arrghhh!’ Jial fumed. ‘Are you sure you still fancy this arrogant twerp, Chrissy?’
Stepping forward, Jial aimed a swinging kick at Si’s shins. As her foot passed harmlessly through his leg, she lost her balance, tumbling to the floor.
‘Serves you right!’ Chrissy laughed.
‘Luckily for him,’ Jial pouted miserably, sitting up on the floor, ‘I remembered halfway through my kick that I’m not supposed to hurt him!’
*
‘I’ll never live this down, you know that Chrissy? I’m not supposed to be allowing this! I’ve failed in my duty to you!’
Jial was still seething after her humiliation of falling on the floor. Now, however, she was complaining that things were even worse. Alongside her, Chrissy was openly holding hands with Si as they walked towards the town’s green.
‘Look, Jial; what’s the problem?’ Chrissy retorted. ‘Si’s a grown up now, right? And he’s helping me grow up, isn’t he?’
Jial just about smouldered with anger.
Si raised his eyes in exasperation.
‘That’s the problem with angels; whenever you want to enjoy yourself, yap yap yap!’
He used his fingers to indicate a yapping mouth.
Jial glowered.
‘You know, I could kick him if I wanted to!’
Suddenly, Si stopped walking, pulling Chrissy to a halt with him.
‘It’s just, well, wonderful holding hands with you like this, Chrissy. But, you know, I’ve always wondered…’
He looked directly into her eyes. It was a look that lingered, as if he were trying to communicate with his eyes alone. He grinned, letting his lips part slightly, invitingly.
Jial at least immediately knew what he was suggesting.
‘No no, Chrissy! You can’t, you can’t!’ she wailed. ‘Not here! Not anywhere! Not yet!’
Chrissy ignored her. As if in a dream, she leant closer towards Si; and he leant closer towards her.
Their lips touched. Melded. Somehow, the strangely beautiful curves of their lips fitted perfectly together.
‘I can’t look!’
Jial covered her eyes, squirming in embarrassment.
‘If I don’t see, I can’t tell you off, I suppose! But I can hear you, so please keep the sighs down, right?’
*
Chapter 10
‘A fine guardian angel I’ve turned out to be!’
Jial
writhed in shame as she miserably ambled alongside a deliriously happy Chrissy and Si.
‘Is she still complaining?’
A deliriously grinning Si glanced at the empty space where he presumed Jial must be.
‘She’ll get over it!’ Chrissy reassured him, clenching his hand tighter, using the move to pull him closer towards her.
‘I will not get over it! Do you know what sort of trouble I’m going to be in for allowing this to happen?’
‘Jial, don’t be such a hypocrite! You love all those love movies and stories! You cry just as much as I do!’
‘Stories, Chrissy! Not reality! There are repercussions in reality!’
Si was watching Chrissy’s argument with Jial with bemusement. He could only guess what the latter was saying, using Chrissy’s own comments, tone and expressions as an unreliable guide.
‘Wow,’ he chuckled, ‘this makes me realise how all this would be impossible if Zorbielle was still around!’
Jial glared at Si, but softened as she spoke to Chrissy.
‘Chrissy, please! I’m not a killjoy! I can understand why you and Si would want to get together! And, to be honest; I think it’s wonderful! Butttt…apart from feeling a bit of a gooseberry tagging along like this, I’m not supposed to allow it!’
Chrissy leant closer towards Jial, whispering as if she had a delicious secret to share.
‘But Jial; you just can’t believe how amazingly wonderful it is to be kissed! It’s far better than you’d think from the stories!’
Jial smiled sadly.
‘Yes, Chrissy; I must admit, I am a little jealous – because I would like to know what it’s like to be kissed!’
*
The green was where most people headed when they didn’t have any particular plans for the day.
They knew there was a good chance there’d be someone they knew similarly aimlessly hanging around the surrounding shops and cafes.
Forming into groups, next they’d either work out something better to do, or linger a while longer, lazing on the grass or joining in light-heartedly played games.
As Chrissy and Si approached the green, a game that didn’t seem to follow any regular rules was in progress. The players were kicking a number of balls around, but immediately giving up possession as soon as someone tagged them. Even so, as Chrissy and Si would expect, everyone seemed to be enjoying playing, laughing rather than getting upset whenever they lost the ball.
