“Let me tell you a story about this little lady,” I said, lifting Frost and putting her on my shoulder. “I inherited her from my ex. About three years ago, she came home with this little fuzzball in her arms. She found her alone in a cardboard box on the sidewalk. All her siblings had been taken and she was all that was left. I didn’t want any pets. I hated cats. Or I thought I did. My knowledge of them was that they were standoffish little pricks who scratched your furniture to hell.”
Ronnie lifted a brow. “Well, aren’t they?”
“I guess they can be. Those first few months with her were tough. She was so tiny that she would crawl into the oddest small spaces and fall asleep. We would search for her for hours, convinced she had snuck outside only to find her curled up in the tissue box. She did scratch the corner of my couch when she was a kitten… but she got over all those bad habits. And what she offered was a sweet, loving companion that accompanied me during some of the hardest times of my life. Within a week of having a kitten, my ex wanted no part of the responsibility. But for some reason, I couldn’t let her go. It was winter in Manchester and the poor thing would have died if we had put her back outside in that cold weather. It was almost like she knew that I was her person… not my ex. And when London left me, Frost was there, kissing my face in the mornings. She stayed by my side when I detoxed from my cocaine addiction. And she moved to good ol’ USA with me.”
Ronnie’s eyes widened. “When you… when you detoxed?” Then, she immediately shook her head. “I’m sorry. I had no idea…”
I waved away her concern. “I don’t go around advertising the fact that I’m a recovering addict,” I said. “But I also don’t hide it. My ex was toxic. She got me started on cocaine and heroin.” I stared right into Ronnie’s bright, blue eyes. I respected her too much to avoid the eye contact. I might not be in any good spot to date anyone, but if we were going to be friends, then she deserved the truth about me. The whole truth. “It ruined several years of my life. My relationship with my sister, grandmother, and my parents crumbled. I’ve been clean for two years, but they still don’t fully trust me.” I sighed as Frost nuzzled my stubble. “Nor should they. I can’t blame them. I stole from every single one of them. I lied. I was a high functioning addict… I even managed to keep my job the whole time, unlike my ex. But, I was also a violent person when I wasn’t high. Irritable didn’t begin to describe me, and I burned a lot of bridges.”
I exhaled the deep breath I’d been holding as Ronnie’s eyes watered. She blinked and looked away.
“Wow… I-I don’t know what to say.”
“That was a lot to unload, I know. The point of my story is… Frost wasn’t easy at first either. But animals—much like people—sometimes need second chances. And third chances. Maybe Penny deserves a little understanding and compassion. He’s a stray, right? There’s no telling what cards life has dealt him up until now. Maybe he came from an abusive home that locked him in a room for days without food or water. Maybe breaking down that door was his survival instinct kicking in.” I ignored the tightness that clawed up my throat. I knew all about those survival instincts.
Penny looked up at us with his caramel brown eyes, head tilting like he was trying to understand and hang onto each word I said.
Ronnie swallowed. “Damn. You should volunteer at the shelter. Between you and Yvonne I bet you could get all those animals adopted in no time.”
My face split wider into a grin as Ronnie gently grabbed Penny’s chin and put her forehead to his affectionately. “No more trashing my house, got it?”
His long, pink tongue flicked out catching her lips and she laughed, sputtering as she pulled back, wiping at her mouth. “Ah! Gross!”
I stood, holding out a hand to help her up. “What do you say we go to an early happy hour instead of that hike?”
She dropped her hand into mine and I pulled her to her feet as she gestured to Penny. “I don’t think I should leave him—”
“We’re not. We’re going to bring him with us. Frank’s has an outdoor patio that allows pets.”
Outside was a little crisp for an April New England afternoon, but the sun was shining and as long as we wore our jackets, we’d be fine.
“You’re on, baker.”
9
Ronnie
It was only four-thirty by the time we sat down at Frank's pizzeria. It felt weird sitting there on the chilly patio with my dog laying calmly at my feet. No, wait, not my dog—my foster dog. His calm demeanor was a complete 180 from the dog who tore down my door a mere two hours ago. And to top it all off, curled up against his belly was Lex's cat.
Like the two were best friends.
It was freaking adorable.
I truly didn't know what to think anymore.
Maybe Yvonne was right. Lex certainly seemed interested in me. Then again, I’ve said that before. I said that for nearly two years. He seemed interested and flirty two years ago when he delivered a blueberry crumble pie to my mother's house on Father's Day. He seemed interested at Cam and Lydia's engagement party. And he certainly seemed interested one month ago on top of Mount Washington.
Bottom line, my instincts couldn't be trusted. No matter how often his turquoise eyes twinkled at me. And no matter how many times he flashed his sexy dimples my way. Nope, I just had to ignore that little flutter of excitement down deep in my core.
"So, you mentioned a girlfriend back in Manchester?" I immediately cringed when I asked the question. Here I was trying to convince myself that he's not interested and what did I do in response? I asked him about his ex-girlfriend. Like a moron.
Lex paused, his glass halfway to his mouth. It was brief, the pause, but I saw it all the same. That little moment of uncertainty. A second’s hesitation from not knowing how to answer. I knew the moment well. I had lived that moment myself many times. Whatever happened between him and his ex, it didn't end well. The difference was, Lex composed himself about 80 times faster than I ever have or ever will.
A grin spread slowly across Lex’s face and he took a long, lingering sip of his Diet Coke. It had never occurred to me until now, after learning that Lex was a recovering addict, that I had never seen him drink alcohol before. He casually licked his lips and set his drinking glass back down on the table. "Was that a question? I couldn’t tell from the inflection—I don’t think I heard a question mark in there."
"Sure, you did. I asked if you mentioned a girlfriend back in Manchester." We both knew I was full shit. My real questions were unspoken, but we both knew what they were. Who is she? Why did it end? Is it really over? Is she the reason you said no to me a month ago?
"Okay then," Lex said with a nod. "Then, yes. I did mention a girlfriend back in Manchester." His brow lifted, just the left one, and it arched high above his turquoise eye. "Ex-girlfriend, to be exact." He sent me a smug smile and leaned back in his chair, confidence brimming over top, ready to spill out at any second. It was infuriating. And sexy. Though I really didn't want to focus too much on the latter.
"Okay, fine," I said with another quick sip of my vodka seltzer. I was no weenie. I wasn't afraid to ask the tough questions. Except, that was sort of a lie. I was afraid, but that never stopped me before. "Is your ex still an addict? Or has she gotten clean, too?”
Lex's eyes widened, but his grin stayed right in place. "Well, Ronnie. I didn't know you had that in you."
I tilted my head, sending him a rapid fire of innocent blinks. "What do you mean?"
“That was so blunt. So personal.”
“I assumed you wanted the no bullshit question, right?”
“Absolutely.” Lex nodded, still smiling, but his lips relaxed. "You have no idea how many people tip-toe around this topic. I’m not afraid to discuss my history. And while, yes, I’m ashamed of how bad I let things get, I’m really proud of myself for how far I’ve come.” He paused, his eyes softening at the corners. “So, to answer your question… my ex has not managed to stay clean and is still an addict."
He didn't
offer any more than that… but what that did reveal is that he was still in contact with her in some form or another. Unfortunately, it didn’t give me insight into why they broke up. No indication if she was still in England or not. And before I could ask, he opened his mouth. "What about you? Any exes to note?"
It was a fair question, considering I had brought it up first. But also, it was the single worst thing he could have asked me. And my physical reaction to his question couldn’t have been more viscerally different than his. My palms felt immediately damp with sweat and I rubbed them down the sides of my yoga pants. I shifted uncomfortably in my seat. My answer was ridiculously embarrassing. "I've only had two boyfriends in my entire life,” I blurted out. And they both ended before I turned twenty-four. Yep, that’s right. I was twenty-eight and I hadn’t had a boyfriend since I was twenty-three and practically left at the altar.
I took a deep breath. “My high school boyfriend, Brian, was…” I sighed. “He thought he was helping me, but he only fed into my eating disorder when I was a teenager. I was a gymnast and my coach… God, he was awful. All the gymnasts would have to weigh in before practice and if you were over 110lbs, he would send you home. Brian used to sell me his Adderall to help me stay under weight.” I blinked, looking up at Lex as his bright blue eyes narrowed with concern. I guess he and I had a little more in common than I realized. Although my Adderall addiction from high school was nowhere near his narcotics addiction. “It caught up to me, surprise, surprise. I collapsed at a competition one day and was hospitalized for being so underweight.”
“I’m so sorry, Ronnie,” he said, his hand sliding across the table and draping over mine.
I gave him the best smile I could muster in that moment and shrugged one shoulder to my ear. “I’m fine now. I think I was more addicted to the control… more addicted to the weight loss than the actual Adderall.” I paused, then shook my head. “No, I was pretty addicted to the pills, too. But luckily it didn’t go too far before I got help.”
He nodded thoughtfully, squeezing my hand. “I’m really glad to hear that.”
“It’s why I’m still so weird with food. I guess I was never able to fully give up that control, you know? I just have a healthier grasp on it.”
He took another sip of his soda. “And what about the second ex?”
I swallowed, my throat feeling suddenly dry. “He—” My voice cracked and I wasn’t able to answer him. I didn’t think that Lex would judge me, ever, for my life choices. But I certainly judged myself. “He… just… he chose someone else,” I said, my voice small. I tried my damnedest to keep the defensiveness out of my voice, though I was certain I failed miserably. It seemed neither of us was willing to offer up a ton of information about our exes. Three years Brandon and I been together. Three years and I knew he had an ex-wife that he paid alimony to. What I didn’t know was that he was still in love with her. Waiting for the day that she would crook her finger and beckon him back… which she did. The day before he and I were supposed to get married.
Lex studied me carefully from over the rim of his glass. “He chose someone other than you? What a bloody idiot.”
I sniffed, grabbing my drink and taking another gulp. “He was a bloody idiot,” I sneered. A bloody idiot who was actually still married… seemingly happily, if Facebook was any indication of the truth.
“So… those were your two serious relationships. Any casual ones?” His brows wiggled.
I laughed and picked off a piece of the bread in the center of the table and threw it at his face. He dodged it, ducking his head, but it hit his shoulder and bounced to the ground between Penny’s paws. She ate it so quickly, she actually made a snarf sound.
“I date,” I said. “I have the occasional dinner thing. But… nothing has stuck.” I shrugged. “Obviously,” I gestured to my ringless finger. “You?”
Lex snorted. “I haven’t had a date in over two years,” he said and I watched as the color crept up his neck, flushing his cheeks a rosy pink. “Two long years. Not since that ex I told you about. My effort has been on staying clean, the move here and some other… family stuff.”
A knot twisted in my stomach. He hasn’t dated anyone? It made me feel better and anxious all at once. We both grew quiet. I played with the small puddle that collected at the base of my sweating glass. And Lex seemed to focus on where the animals were snuggling together on the ground.
It was only a minute or so of silence, but it felt like eons. “So,” Lex said and I nearly jumped out of my skin. “It’s nice to see you splurging,” he said, gesturing to my drink. “I don’t see you indulge a whole lot.” His grin widened. “I was beginning to think you didn’t have any vices.”
“It’s not really a splurge,” I said without thinking. “Clear alcohol is allowed in moderation on my diet and I always order with seltzer water rather than tonic, because tonic weirdly has a ton of sugar.”
I clamped my lips together. Shit. Nutrition and fitness were quite literally my life. It was second nature to describe my eating habits and why I chose them. “Sorry,” I murmured and shook my head. “Force of habit.”
Lex smiled kindly at me. “Don’t apologize. I like hearing about you. About all the little details.”
I rolled my eyes. “It must be pretty boring hearing about why I chose vodka seltzer instead of vodka tonic.”
He shrugged. “What you think people find boring, some might find fascinating.”
“One man’s trash is another man’s treasure?” I said, reciting the old adage.
Lex paused and took a moment to reach across the table. His hands were chilly, but not freezing as they draped over my knuckles and gave me a gentle squeeze. “You, Veronica Tripp are no one’s trash.”
I swallowed hard and slowly lifted my gaze to his. The table between us was small—only a couple of feet in circumference, but in that moment, it felt like an entire valley was between us. Like those couple of feet were way too far away.
I don’t know who moved first. Maybe we moved at exactly the same time. But next thing I knew, we were leaning over the table, both sort of half-standing, half-bending and Lex’s lips captured mine in a tangle of passion.
Our kiss wasn’t sweet. It wasn’t tender. It wasn’t anything like all the times I had envisioned kissing Lex. He always seemed so gentle… so proper. But this kiss was feverish. His lips parted mine, urging me to open up to him which I quickly obliged, gasping as I opened my mouth against his.
Lex’s hands scooped up my hair to the back of my head and with a quick twirl of his fingers, a section of my curls were wrapped in his hands, tugging against his firm hold.
My head was spinning—I would have blamed the vodka seltzer, except I’d only had half of my first glass. His scent was all around me and I inhaled him as I savored his dizzying taste. I needed more of him.
I reached up with both hands, holding the back of his neck, kneading his firm muscles in my palms, and I swallowed his groan.
His tongue dipped into my mouth with such a smooth, strong motion, it left me breathless. I could taste his desire for me; I could feel his raw, unhinged lust. Heat was radiating off both of us, despite the chilly April air.
I hadn’t been kissed like that in… ever.
I was about to say years, but the truth was, even Brandon had never kissed me that intensely.
We broke from the kiss, panting, staring at each other from across the table. Almost immediately, I felt the blush crawling up from my chest and over my face. I glanced around the pizzeria, grateful for the fact that it was early enough that most people were still at work. If this got back to my mom? Or worse, my brothers, I’d never hear the end of it.
I cleared my throat and we both lowered back down to our seats.
“That was…”
“Incredible,” Lex interrupted me, smiling that boyish grin. His russet hair was messed up from my hands running through it.
I gave a girlie giggle that, hand to God, didn’t sound a damn thing like me. “
I was going to say unexpected. But… yeah. I guess it was pretty incredible, too.”
His phone was face down on the metal table and buzzed like a machine gun. Both of our animals jolted awake and Frost gave a disgruntled meow in response.
I laughed out loud, unable to help myself from reacting to her cranky tone. “She’s an outspoken little thing, isn’t she?”
Lex’s brows jumped. “You have no idea.” He turned his buzzing phone over and all humor melted from his face as he looked down at the screen. I saw his swallow bob his Adam’s apple up and down and he held up a finger to me. “I-I have to take this. I’m sorry. I’ll just be a minute.”
He stood, checking that Frost’s leash was secure beneath the leg of his chair before he swiped his phone, walking inside. All I heard was, “This is Alexander,” before he was out of range for me to hear anything more.
Biding my time, I pulled out my phone and saw I had another text from Yvonne.
Yvonne: I understand if you need me to come get Copper tonight.
I sighed and glanced down at Penny, now peaceful as could be with his new best friend, Frost. Even as people walked by the pizzeria, he didn’t bark. He didn’t even jump to his feet like I had seen Callie’s dog do a million times. Her dog, Ruckus, truly earned his name. He was a force. Penny wasn’t that. He just had… issues.
I chuckled and leaned down to give him a scratch behind his ears. “Who doesn’t have issues, huh, mister?”
Meow. “Oh really? You don’t, Miss Thang?”
I smiled and scratched Frost beneath her chin before typing a quick text back to Yvonne.
Let me give him one more try. Everyone deserves a second chance, right?
My throat grew tight as Lex’s words from earlier rang in my ears. What if my own family hadn’t given me the help I needed? Sometimes we just need someone to support us… believe in us. And for the sake of finding Penny his new forever family, I had to try to help him. Because with that intense level of separation anxiety, he wasn’t likely to be able to find and keep a new family.
Sweet on You Page 7
