He laughs a little. "The nurse told me about that. Said you tackled him in the hall when he was trying to stop Auburn from telling me good-bye again."
I smile. Auburn, I think to myself. I've been wondering for three weeks what her name is. Of course it would be Auburn. I've never heard of anyone else with that name; it suits her perfectly.
"Thank you for that," Adam says. His words come out in a pained whisper. I hate that I'm forcing him to talk so much when I know it hurts him.
I hold up the painting a little higher and look down at it.
"Last night, after she left," I say, "I guess you could say I was inspired to paint this for you. Or maybe it's for her. Both of you, I guess." I immediately look up at him. "I hope that's not weird."
He shrugs. "Depends on what it is."
I stand and walk the painting to him, turning it around so that he can see it.
He doesn't have any type of reaction to it at first. He just stares at it. I let him hold it, and I back away, a little embarrassed that I thought he would want something like this. "It's my first attempt at painting," I say, excusing the fact that he probably thinks it's horrendous.
His eyes immediately meet mine and the expression on his face is anything but indifference. He points to it. "This is your first attempt?" he says in disbelief. "Seriously?"
I nod. "Yeah. Probably my last, too."
He immediately shakes his head. "I hope not," he says. "This is incredible." He reaches to the remote and presses the button to lift the head of the bed a few more inches. He points to a table next to the chair. "Grab that pen."
I don't question him. I hand him the pen and watch as he flips the painting over and writes something on the back of the canvas. He reaches to the nightstand beside his bed and tears off a sheet of paper from a notepad. He writes something down on the notepad and hands me both the painting and the piece of paper.
"Do me a favor," he says as I take both of them out of his hands. "Will you mail this to her? From me?" He points to the slip of paper in my hands. "Her address is at the top and the return address is at the bottom."
I look down at the slip of paper in my hands, and I read her full name.
"Auburn Mason Reed," I say out loud.
What are the chances?
I smile and run my thumb over the letters in her middle name. "We have the same middle name."
I look back up at Adam, and he's lowering his bed again with a faint smile on his face. "That could be fate, you know."
I shake my head, dismissing his comment. "I'm pretty sure she's your fate. Not mine."
His voice is strained, and it takes a tremendous amount of effort for him to roll onto his side. He closes his eyes and says, "Hopefully she has more than one fate, Owen."
He doesn't open his eyes again. He falls asleep, or maybe just needs a break from speaking. I look down at her name again and think about the words he just spoke.
Hopefully she has more than one fate.
It makes me feel good to know that as much as he loves her, he also knows she'll move on after his death, and he accepts that. It even seems like he wants that for her. Unfortunately, if this really were fate, we would have been placed together under different circumstances and with way better timing.
I look up at him again, and his eyes are still closed. He pulls the covers over his arms, so I quietly back out of the room, painting in hand.
I'll mail this painting to her, because he asked me to. And then I'm going to throw away her address. I'll try to forget her name, even though I know I never will.
Who knows? If we're meant to be together and fate really does exist, maybe one of these days she'll wind up at my door. Maybe Adam will, in some way, be the one to make that happen.
Until that day comes, though, I'm pretty sure I have something to keep me occupied. I think with the inadvertent help of her and Adam, I may have just discovered my calling.
I look down at the painting in my hands, and I flip it over. I read the last words Adam will ever write to her.
I'll love you forever. Even when I can't.
When I turn the painting around to face me again, I run my fingers over it. I touch the space between the two hands, and I think about everything between the two of them that is pulling them apart.
I'll love you forever. Even when I can't.
And I hope, for her sake, that Adam is right. I hope she does have a second fate.
Because she deserves it.
Acknowledgments
First and foremost, a huge thank-you to Danny O'Connor for contributing the artwork for Confess. After searching high and low for art I felt could represent Owen, your work stood out above the rest. You have an incredible talent, and your fans (myself included) are lucky to be able to experience it.
As always, a huge thank-you to Johanna Castillo, Ariele Fredman, Judith Curr, Kaitlyn Zafonte, and the entire Atria Books team.
To my agent, Jane Dystel, and the entire Dystel and Goderich team.
To the Weblichs, for always making sure I'm stocked with pictures of Harry, cans of Diet Pepsi, and lots of positive energy. To the CoHorts, for giving me daily reminders as to why I do this in the first place. And to my biggest supporters, who are subjected to ten different versions of every chapter, but never complain: Kay Miles, Kathryn Perez, Chelle Northcutt, Madison Seidler, Karen Lawson, Marion Archer, Jennifer Stiltner, Kristin Phillips-Delcambre, Salie-Benbow Powers, Maryse, and so many others.
To Murphy for being the best AsSISTERnt out there. To Stephanie, for being there from the beginning, as a boss and a best friend. To my mother, sister, husband, children, and everyone else who supports me endlessly and never complains.
To everyone who takes a chance and picks up one of my books, thank you for the opportunity to live my dream.
And of course, a huge thank-you to two of the people I am grateful this career brought into my life: Tarryn Fisher and Vilma Gonzalez. You guys have been my rocks this year.
Read more from #1 New York Times bestselling author Colleen Hoover
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COLLEEN HOOVER is the #1 New York Times bestselling author of Slammed, Point of Retreat, This Girl, Hopeless, Losing Hope, Finding Cinderella, Maybe Someday, Ugly Love, and Maybe Not. She lives in Texas with her husband and their three boys. Please visit ColleenHoover.com.
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This book is a work of fiction. Any references to historical events, real people, or real places are used fictitiously. Other names, characters, places, and events are products of the author's imagination, and any resemblance to actual events or places or persons living or dead is entirely coincidental.
Copyright (c) 2015 by Colleen Hoover Artwork created by Danny O' Connor (aka DOC) All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form whatsoever. For information, address Atria Books Subsidiary Rights Department, 1230 Avenue of the Americas, New York, NY 10020.
First Atria Paperback edition March 2015
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Interior design by Kyoko Watanabe Cover Design by Laywan Kwan Cover Photograph of Woman by Stocksy United Photography The Library of Congress has catalogued this book as follows: Hoover, Colleen.
Confess / by Colleen Hoover. -- First Atria paperback edition.
pages ; cm
"ATRIA FICTION ORIGINAL TRADE."
I. Title.
PS3608.O623C66 2015
813'.6--dc23
2014043627
ISBN 978-1-4767-9145-6
ISBN 978-1-47679146-3 (ebook)
Confess Page 24
