An hour later, the session came to a close. Everyone repeated the phrase, “No one can do this but me. No one can make me feel inferior without my permission. No one can bring me down. Only I can lift me up. Only I can forgive and only I can be forgiven by myself.”
Logan felt truth in some of the words, but he knew in time, it would sink in and mean more.
He held back after the session ended and waited for everyone to leave when he approached Miranda.
“So, I hear some celebrating is in order,” he said with a smile.
She looked to him and beamed. “That would be correct. You’ve attended all the required sessions and as far as I can tell, you’ve done really well.” She patted his arm.
Logan furrowed his brows slightly and thought the gesture felt forced.
“Remember that I’m your person, Logan, no matter what direction you take in life. I’m always here and will always talk to you.”
He tilted his head. “You’re making it sound like I’ll never see you again.” Logan thought of the meeting with Master Sergeant today and wanted to take the words back as soon as he said them. He could be leaving, and soon, and he may never see her again. Fuck my life, he thought to himself.
“Oh, well, I’ll be here.” She lowered her voice and turned to her documents. She pulled one out and signed it, then handed it to Logan. “Here you go.”
He stared at it for a moment and when he read the release papers he earned. He almost did not want to take them. “Is this a break up?”
She blinked. “A break up? Don’t we have to be together if we were breaking up?”
“Yeah, but that’s what this feels like. Are you trying to avoid going out with me now that I’m all cleared? Because I’m telling you now, you’re going out with me. I know where you work, woman,” he winked, hoping a little humor helped what she was feeling, whatever it was.
She smiled. “I talked to your Master Sergeant today, Logan. He told me, in no certain amount of time, you’d be headed back to war. Apparently, you’re quite important in your job details.”
He sighed and folded the document a few times, then shoved it into his back pocket. “Is that why you’re acting this way? Because of something he told you? Well, let me tell you something else. These next few months might be the best months of your life, but you’re not willing to chance it because I might have to go back to war. Is that what you’re telling me? Because if it is, you fucking suck at being someone’s person.”
Logan turned on his heel and headed toward the door.
“Logan! Stop, wait!”
“No,” he turned to face her and shook his head. “Why should I? So you can feel sorry for me then crap on me later? No, thanks. Just shit on me now and get it over with.”
“Oh my god, you fucking drama queen!” Miranda shouted.
Logan raised his brows in surprise, then he laughed. “You called me a fucking drama queen. Really?”
“Yeah, I did. Now, shut up!” She crossed the room and stood in front of him. He towered over her but the attitude she showed right now definitely put her on top. “Now you listen to me!” she poked him in the chest. “I’m reluctant to date you because, honestly, you intimidate the shit out of me! You scare me, Logan, and no one has ever scared me the way you do. No one. Ever! Now understand why I’m feeling reluctant.
“I meet this amazing, tall, good looking, troubled man, who is pining for me. I put up a fight because ethically, I cannot and will not date you while I’m treating you. Period! Our sessions come to an end and I realize, tonight is the night I could actually have a date with you. It scared the shit out of me to consider this! If you would take just five minutes to see things from my point of view, maybe you would understand why I’m reluctant.”
He blinked. Stunned does not begin to cover what Logan felt at her confession. Surprised, definitely. Shocked, definitely.
He cleared his throat. “Well, okay then. Now that we’ve cleared the air, how about that date?”
She stood there and did not mutter a word, for about a second. “And you have nothing to say to all of that?”
He shook his head and smiled. “I’m just happy you did not throw in there about my leaving for war.”
Miranda smiled and offered a light shrug. “I kind of know what I’m getting into with you, Logan. I mean,” she stepped closer and lightly touched his chest where she poked him before. “I’ve been looking forward to this day for a while.”
He glanced to her fingers as they danced across his chest. “Have you now?” Logan lifted his gaze to hers, his voice lowering an octave as he looked into her eyes.
She nodded. “Each time you kissed me, it felt wrong, like I was cheating on someone with you. In a way, I suppose I was. But now,” she pushed her arms up around his neck and leaned into him, “now you’re all I can think about and all I want.”
Logan grinned and gripped her hips. He pulled her closer until their bodies were flush together. “Well you’ve just made my night that much better.” He did not waste any more time and leaned in to kiss her. Electric shock, if a kiss could be described as such, jolted his body alive when their lips met. Wanting something for so long, waiting patiently for it to be his, was now within his grasp.
He pushed against her body until hers stopped at the nearest wall behind her. He slid a hand down her hip to her thigh, then pulled her leg up. He ground his growing erection against her and Miranda gasped into his mouth.
He now had Miranda for himself and soon, he would claim her in his bed. He wanted to sink deep inside her, make love to her all night, taste her, and do it all over again. He looked forward to having her on his arm, seeing her when he returned from the field and from missions, he…
Wait, what happens once I have her? Will I still want her?
He pulled back and stared into her eyes. She panted softly and her lips were slightly swollen from the kissing. She cupped his cheeks and stared back.
“Are you okay?” she asked him.
He nodded and stepped back. “I don’t want to move this too fast.” He could not believe the words he just said, but he meant them. Concern plagued him on how he would feel the next morning after making love to this woman. Would he still want her?
“Logan,” Miranda tilted her head slightly, “look at me, please.”
He lifted his gaze to hers. No words came to him.
“Please remember, I’m not her. Please do not hold me in punishment for the senseless acts she committed.”
He smiled softly and shook his head. “I know that, and I wouldn’t. It’s just hard to think about, I guess.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
He chuckled. “No, I have better things on my mind right now than talking about old events.”
She smiled and leaned back into him. “Then let’s go on our date.”
Chapter Nineteen
Logan and Miranda left separately from the support group location and made plans for him to pick her up. She had scribbled her address on a slip of paper and handed it to him. He arrived a few minutes before seven that night and approached Miranda’s door. His nervous stomach made him think twice before knocking.
She is not Susan.
She will not cheat first chance she gets.
She promised me she’d be my person.
I cannot completely depend on her to be there. I have to accept and know she will be there.
Damn, when did I become this person? Fucking pussy.
He reached for the doorbell and with a nervous finger, he pressed it. The sound of heels struck the hardwood floor in her home and Logan took a step back. He pressed his hands down the fabric of his suit, a suit he had picked up a few weeks ago in hopes of the date that was about to occur.
The one he had outgrew in size. He attempted to pull on the dress jacket and when he pulled his arms forward, the material hugged his arms too tightly and the back split on the seams.
Dressed in a dark gray with a silver and white tie, Logan hoped Miranda
would appreciate the lengths he went through for this date. The door unlocked and when it opened, the other side held one of Heaven’s angels.
Miranda stood in a sleeveless black dress that cut down and crisscrossed over her breast. It hugged her upper body in a way that would be sinful for one of Heaven’s own. He felt his mouth water just looking her over. The bottom of her dress flowed freely; one side cut to the knee while the other hung to the mid-calf. Paired with a pair of black pumps with silver heels, the woman simply was stunning.
Her hair had been curled and pulled back while a few ringlets hung around her face. A silver necklace hung curiously between her breasts. More than anything, Logan wanted to reach for it and ask if she wore this outfit, and this necklace, for him.
Instead, he stepped forward and smiled. “My god you are a picture of perfection, woman.” He shook his head. “I do not deserve such amazing goodness that you possess tonight.” He held his hand out and when she placed her hand in his, he brought it to his lips and kissed it, never breaking eye contact.
She smiled and blushed. “Thank you, however, you look quite amazing yourself. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen you in anything but casual attire.” She stepped out of her home, locked up, and slipped her hand into the crook of Logan’s elbow. “Are you ready for this?”
He nodded. “I have been waiting for this for quite some time. Yes, I’m definitely ready.”
“What are our plans tonight then?” They descended her porch steps and headed toward his car. He opened the door for her and once she was inside, he closed it. Making his way to his side, he got in and started the car.
“I thought we could have dinner at a place uptown, then at the park, they’re playing old movies and rumor has it, they laid out a makeshift dance floor.”
“Why would we need a dance floor for a movie?” she asked him.
Logan grinned. “Because some people enjoy dancing to the music of the older classics.” He winked at her.
“I had no idea you danced, Logan.”
He chuckled. “What makes you think I have any idea how to dance? I was hoping you’d lead me.”
Miranda laughed at this. Eventually they reached the restaurant. The valet driver opened their doors and Logan handed over the keys. He escorted her inside and provided his name, then the hostess led them to their table.
The restaurant was small and quiet. Soft music played from the house band and the atmosphere had a low ambiance. Tables sat a few feet from one another with black tablecloths. The walls were a dark red brick and a fireplace was lit toward the back.
After their waiter took their drink and food order, Logan reached across the table and took Miranda’s hand. “I need to thank you.”
She smiled. “For what, exactly?”
“For everything. You know so much about me and you did not judge.” He shrugged softly. “If you met me before my drunken binge, it makes me wonder if you would have given me the time of day.”
“There’s no telling what would have happened, Logan. Let’s focus on the now, not what could have been.” She smiled and took a sip of her red wine. “You’ve come a long way in a short period of time. I’m very proud of you.”
He nodded and thanked her. Soon their food arrived. One allowed the other to taste and both swooned over the flavors that exploded from the food. As they finished, the table was cleared and Logan leaned in.
“I hope you’re having fun so far.”
She nodded quickly. “Oh yes, definitely! And you?”
“Oh,” he gestured playfully, “I think I’m quite bored, honestly.”
She blinked. He chuckled. “Oh I see, you’re teasing me,” she stood from her chair and raised a single brow. “Join me on the dance floor, royal ass.”
He laughed and stood, then took her hand. “Royal ass?” He led her toward the dance floor. A foxtrot began and Logan pulled Miranda close.
“Yes, for saying you’re bored, royal ass. Now,” she slipped her hand into his, “shall we dance?”
Logan smirked and began on the first beat, and lead Miranda around the dance floor in a traditional foxtrot. In one of the side steps, he leaned in and whispered, just for her, “I do know how to dance. I learned as a child. I was curious if you’d take a chance to show me your skills.”
“I can see,” she whispered back. She looked to his lips as he grinned, then back to his eyes. “Royal pain my ass, you are.”
He dipped her and smiled. “Yoda much?” He chuckled and pulled them in an upright position. They finished the song when a tango started. Logan grinned and tightened his hold.
“Oh, don’t tell me you tango as well?”
“I guess you’ll just have to find out, now, won’t you?”
She grinned and giggled softly to herself. Logan knew she enjoyed what he was doing or she would have not been so eager to continue dancing. He led her in the first few bars of the song, then on the third beat, he leaned to the side and swept her quickly. He leaned in and slowly, ran his lips just above her skin line of her breasts. Miranda shuddered in his arms.
He pulled them upright and looked into her eyes. They continued to dance then Miranda surprised him. She turned her back to him and bent down, her bottom almost touching her heels, then twisted side to side in a provocative tango move. Logan raised his brows in surprise and held her hands in his. As she slowly made her way back up, she purposely pushed her ass toward him and brushed against his pelvis.
Logan pulled her against him, her back to his chest. He touched her cheek and turned her face toward him. She parted her lips and her eyes were focused on his mouth. She exhaled softly against his lips, then turned out, away from him.
He groaned and spun her back in. “You are going to embarrass me with the hard on I’m going to sport shortly.”
“Promise?” she whispered. She kicked her leg out and wrapped it around his, then removed it. They continued their tango and the song ended. But for Logan and Miranda, they continued to stand on the dance floor, embracing one another. The singer for the band cheered on the couples dancing. Logan finally broke the intense stare and smiled. He took Miranda’s hand and led her back toward the table.
He had no idea Miranda had this in her. The woman possessed a quality that outshone anyone in his past, including Susan. The way she moved, the way she carried herself, the way she held out an image of innocence hidden behind a wall of absolute sex appeal.
Logan knew he was in trouble with Miranda. He said he wanted to take things slow but right now, he wanted to forgo the old movie in the park and take her home.
He wanted to press her against her bed, taste her, touch her, and most of all sink himself deep inside her. He only hoped she wanted the same in return, and by the way she held herself tonight on the dance floor, he could guarantee she did.
“So,” Miranda started and interrupted his pornographic thoughts of her, “are we still going to this movie at the park?”
He grinned and chuckled. “After what just happened out there? I’ll be honest with you. I would much rather take you home, right now, and show you what I’m thinking.”
She pursed her lips together and blushed. Miranda lowered her gaze and pulled her purse into her lap. What she said next caught Logan completely by surprise and if he were honest with himself, it took a lot to surprise him. Tonight though, Miranda had been pushing those limitations. “Then I suggest we leave for my home while the night is still young.”
He raised a brow. “Are you sure this is what you want to do?”
She nodded. “I trust you. There’s still so much about me you don’t know and I think it’s time, if we’re going to do this,” she motioned between the two of them, “you find out.”
He nodded. “Then I’m looking forward to it.”
They stood from their table and Miranda slipped her hand into the crook of his arm. As they waited for the valet to pull his car around, Logan took the opportunity to turn Miranda to face him. He touched her cheek softly, then tilted her head up. He lean
ed in and pressed a soft kiss onto her lips.
When she licked his lips in a tease, Logan groaned. “Where is my fucking car?”
She giggled as it pulled around to the front.
They climbed in and as the doors shut, Logan turned to her. “I have no problem dropping you off and leaving for the night, if you’re not ready for this next step.”
She smiled. “Thank you for offering, but I think it will be you, who needs to be ready for this next step. You’ve been through a lot and tonight is no different.”
He nodded in agreement and left the restaurant. “Is there a past I need to know about?”
“Somewhat,” she told him. “Some of it I’ll share, some of it is irrelevant to moving forward. Like yours, there are some things on a need to know bases.”
“Understood.”
A short drive later, they arrived at Miranda’s home. He got out and made his way to her side of the car and opened the door for her. He took her hand as she stepped out and closed the door behind her. He interlaced his hand with hers and led her toward the door.
“Last chance to tell me to get lost,” he teased as he leaned in. He kissed her softly on the lips and ran his hand along her cheek, cupping the back of her neck.
She whimpered as his tongue teased her lips. “Logan,” she breathed, “let’s get inside before the neighbors stare.
He chuckled and released her. She opened her door and turned on the lights. Setting her purse and keys on the banister by the door, she turned to him. “Feel free to remove the jacket. You may hang it in the closet here,” she pointed to a closed door. “I’ll be in the kitchen.” She motioned toward the area, smiled, then left the room.
Logan removed his jacket and opened the closet door. A few of her jackets and boots were inside. He hung his coat and closed it. Jazz music picked up in the silence. He walked into the kitchen and found Miranda holding a bottle of champagne.
“If you would, kind, sir?” She handed the bottle to him and he grinned, accepting it.
He popped the cork near the sink and as the bubbles ran over his hands, she quickly passed him two goblets. He poured two and handed her one, then set the champagne down.
Field Stripped: 15 Steamy Military Romances Page 41
