by Marian Tee
Chapter Fifteen
MJ did not sleep in his room last night.
Helios had lain awake in his bed the entire night, tense and furious with himself for caring so much for someone who was obviously playing him false. Why did he still feel so strongly about her? He had seen the evidence with his own eyes. She had lied to him, and she was meeting Yuri in secret. If he was smart, he should have thrown her out the moment he had discovered her betrayal.
Where the fuck did she sleep last night?
The question burned inside him like lava, making Helios clench and unclench his fists while watching the younger bikers practice their stunts on the twenty-foot custom-designed ramp in their backyard. While stunts didn’t make money, no one outside the club really knew that, making it a passable front for the club’s underground activities.
MJ stood with the rest of the volunteers, a part and not a part of them. Non-performing members stood at the opposite side, making the divide between bikers and volunteers distinctly clear. Across her, she tried not to look too often at Helios, who was dressed in full gear with his helmet on. He made a striking figure, and the lovely Astrid, with her clouds of blond hair and her voluptuous figure flaunted in a leather corset top, shorts, and knee-high boots, was a perfect complement.
Astrid’s gaze met hers, and the other woman’s eyes were filled with scorn. You don’t belong here.
MJ dug her nails into her palms at the look. Yes, she knew that now. In fact, it was what she had struggled to accept every minute of last night. She had remained in the study hall the entire time, her limbs frozen with the utter humiliation of Helios’ parting shot.
Only when everyone had gone and she had shut the lights off did the tears finally fall. He had hurt her. He had really hurt her, and she just couldn’t understand why. While neither of them had spoken of love in the week they had been together, MJ had really thought he at least cared for her. He couldn’t have faked it all this time. So what had changed?
It was that question which had given her the courage to face him again today, even knowing that she could be setting herself up for another dose of public shaming. It had already started when she had tried to approach Helios earlier. One of the rookie bikers stood in her way. In a shamed voice and without looking at her in the eye, the biker had mumbled, “Bikers only, I’m afraid. You need to join the volunteers at the back and watch from there.”
Those words hurt, too.
And without looking at anyone, MJ knew that everyone had heard it. Feeling their gazes on her was all she needed to know that everyone knew Helios had taken away the right for her to stand next to him.
It hurt. It…hurt.
“Serves her right.” The sneered words from one of the volunteers behind her jerked MJ back to reality. “She’s been acting too high and mighty while playing the slut in the President’s bed.”
Had she been acting like that, MJ wondered dully. All she could remember was that she had been happy the man who had changed her life wanted her to be in his. That was all she remembered. And then after that, it was just blackness.
She was so tempted to wish that she had her old life back. At least everything James did was predictable, even if there was no guarantee she would live another day. With James, she always knew what she had to do.
Lie flat. Don’t close your eyes. Keep your hair out of the way. Relax. Relax. And think.
With James, she always knew where she stood, always knew that no matter how hard she tried, he just didn’t love her.
But Helios…
Her nails dug deeper into her palms.
Helios was so damn unfair.
He had made her think it was possible he could want her, and now…
And now it was obvious he hadn’t ever wanted her.
MJ looked down at her palms with almost numb fascination, wondering what she had to do to make herself bleed. Anything to distract her from the fact that Astrid was stroking Helios’ chest with her red nails while she whispered something in his ear, a naughty expression on her stunning face.
The sound of applause made MJ look up, and she sucked her breath in when she saw Astrid confidently walk to her own bike, hips swaying provocatively with each step. The crowd of bikers cheered when she swung one leg over the seat before settling down and making its engine roar.
And then she was off, speeding towards the ramp without warning, hair flying behind her. She was a sight to behold as she went up then down then up and down again, doing this several times to gain momentum for that perfect double spin in the air.
Wolf whistles and roars of approval erupted from the crowd as Astrid executed the stunt perfectly. When she rode back to Helios’ side, she switched the engine off and looked over her shoulder.
At MJ.
“Your turn.”
MJ’s eyes widened. Surely Astrid couldn’t have been speaking to her?
But her doubts were soon dispelled when, after not receiving a response, Astrid walked towards her, stopping only when she was a step away from MJ.
Since Astrid was half a foot taller than she was, MJ was forced to look up, and the action had the other volunteers snickering behind her. MJ’s cheeks burned.
One perfectly shaped brow lifted. “Well? Didn’t you hear me?” Astrid asked snidely. She gestured to the bikes behind her. “Take your pick then it’s your turn.”
Astrid had thrown a magnificent fit in her own dorm when she learned that Helios Andreadis had taken a girlfriend of sorts. Being the President’s girl was what she had always aspired to be, and it made Astrid sick with rage that some small-town nobody had usurped her position.
Now, sensing the discord between Helios and the little slut, Astrid was determined to push the two further apart.
She crossed her arms against her chest. “Come on, little girl.” Astrid deliberately used the same reference Helios himself had used the other time, having her own little birds informing her about everything that went on inside the club.
MJ flinched at Astrid’s choice of words, her gaze immediately seeking Helios in her pain, thinking that he was the one who had told Astrid about it.
Helios’ face hardened. It was obvious what MJ was thinking – what everyone was thinking. Even Kellion was looking at him with grim disapproval, and Hallie was glaring at him. He had an urge to strangle Astrid for her taunts, but he kept himself in check.
She deserved this for daring to play him for a fool.
Astrid grabbed MJ’s wrist and dragged her towards where the bikes were parked. “I’m very competitive, but I’m not totally heartless. I heard you’re not so crazy about bikes so how about you just ride one until the end of this lane? No ramps. No stunts. Just one straight ride to prove that you want to fight for Helios.”
When MJ didn’t speak, Astrid asked with a smirk, “Or are you giving up on him?”
The surprisingly apt question had MJ paling, and she unconsciously turned towards Helios. Was she giving up on Helios?
Before she could answer, someone said in a furious voice behind her, “Don’t do it.”
Helios stiffened, recognizing Yuri’s voice even before he saw his friend stalking towards MJ’s side. Yuri looked haggard. He had been missing since yesterday. Had the two been together last night, talking about him? Laughing at him?
He had not used the CCTV to find out where MJ was, not trusting himself with the consequences if he did catch MJ in a more compromising situation with Yuri.
But now, looking at Yuri’s haggard face and the angry concern in his eyes as he gazed at MJ, Helios knew that the two shared something special. Something he was not a part of.
It took a while for MJ to realize that someone was talking to her. Lack of sleep, stress, and the pain of Helios’ suddenly cruel attitude had made her especially vulnerable, and when she found herself surrounded by James’ favorite torture devices, she just could not breathe.
Relax, relax—
“MJ? She felt someone shaking her and looked up, blinking several times b
efore her gaze cleared. It was Yuri.
“You don’t need to do this,” Yuri gritted out again. He had just come back from another trip to MJ’s hometown and this time, he knew the truth about her. He knew everything about her. She was not going to be good news for the club, but she was good news for Helios. That was enough. Or at least it would be if Helios could get his head out of his ass before he ended up ruining everything for both of them.
The look on MJ’s face was that of a terrified child. Couldn’t Helios see this? When had he gone so fucking blind?
Yuri turned to the club’s president. “Why are you making her do this?”
Why do you fucking care?
Helios wanted to snarl the question out, but to do so would be to admit that he knew the two of them had been fooling him, and that he still cared for…her. Pain made Helios unable to see the deep-etched fear in MJ’s eyes. All he saw was a woman who had betrayed him. Just like Odessa.
“It’s up to you.” His words were dispassionate. “If you want to prove that you want me, then ride a bike. You should be thankful to Astrid for being so generous.”
Helios’ words were like nails being driven into her own coffin, and that coffin was but a cage…of her own love.
Suddenly, everything became so clear.
She used to think that fear was the only reason she did things for James, but it wasn’t. It wasn’t just fear. Not at all. What drove her to lie on the ground, to risk doing everything James did was because…
She loved James.
And she had wished, by doing what he told her to do, there would come a day he would love her back.
Her gaze turned to Helios, but she didn’t really see him. She saw James. She saw a man she loved. Right now, they were one and the same. And they wanted the same thing, too. Her heart on a platter. Just because.
The tears on MJ’s face made Helios inhale sharply. He wanted to roar. Stop. He didn’t want her looking like that, dammit.
But the words remained unspoken when he watched Yuri grabbing his girl’s wrist, Yuri trying to comfort his girl, and saying words that Helios knew deep inside he should be the one saying.
Yuri turned to him. “Don’t make her do this—”
Helios cut Yuri off, saying in a coldly pleasant voice, “It’s her choice.”
MJ was already walking towards one of the practice bikes the club lent to rookies. It was obvious to everyone she was shaking.
Something about it triggered alarms inside him, but Helios deliberately ignored it. If she wanted to fucking prove she wanted him, even if she wanted Yuri, then he hoped to God she suffered. He damn hoped she would suffer the way she so easily shredded him into pieces with her betrayal.
MJ looked down at the bike.
James’ taunting voice echoed inside her head. Ready, MJ?
She slowly swung her leg over the seat.
I’m gonna do this fast.
She started the engine without any difficulties. It was ridiculous, the way she had been able to memorize everything she had to do to ride a bike just by watching what James did.
Here I come…
She let the motorcycle fly.
Helios’ blood turned cold when he saw MJ’s bike blast off. She was going too fast for a beginner, dammit. Too fucking fast.
“STOP!” He couldn’t believe she was heading for the ramp. “STOP, DAMN YOU, STOP!”
And then she was soaring.
His heart stopped as she soared.
But everything went wrong after that.
There wasn’t enough momentum, and the bike went down fast, his heart crashing with it.
The motorcycle hit the ground with a loud smash, and Helios broke into a run as he saw MJ let it go with a scream and go flying like an unwanted doll hurled in the air. “MJ!” He ran as fast as he could, but he knew even before he reached her he would be too late.
MJ’s head hit the edge of the ramp first, and her body laid twisted on the ground, a doll broken by his cruelty.
“NO!” His chest was heaving and he could feel the blood leaving his face as he skidded to his knees next to her. “MJ?” he asked hoarsely, turning her around carefully.
Blood.
It ran down the side of her head, and the sight of it turned his stomach upside down.
Yuri was the first to reach them. “Fuck,” he whispered, seeing the gash on MJ’s head. Behind them, Kellion was already calling 911 and Hallie was crying.
“Don’t touch her!” The words were torn out of Helios when Yuri tried to reach for MJ’s hand. Her head was cradled on his lap, but she still hadn’t stirred and her breathing was too shallow.
He lifted his gaze to Yuri. “She’s not yours—”
“She never was,” Yuri snapped. “It’s always been you.”
Yuri’s words ripped through the haze of jealousy in Helios’ gaze, and when he looked down at MJ, shame burned inside him. What had he done? What had he fucking done?
Chapter Sixteen
“She saw you on the day we saved Rick.”
The quiet words Yuri spoke was the only thing that made Helios move his gaze away from MJ. She laid on the hospital bed, unconscious, her head bandaged. She looked so small and pale on the bed. It killed him inside, knowing that he was the reason she was there.
He didn’t care if Yuri loved her or not, or if she loved him back.
That moment, that terrifying moment of almost losing her had made everything so fucking clear to Helios.
He loved her.
He loved her more than he had loved anyone, and this all-consuming love he felt for MJ made it so fucking obvious he had never loved Odessa at all. That woman had been an infatuation, a way of making him feel he had someone because his family had made him feel alone and unwanted.
But MJ…
Helios twisted unevenly to face Yuri. “Rick? Our old tutor?”
Kellion, Hallie, and Andreus were also listening now. They all knew Rick. He had been the only man in Greece who had been willing to stand against the might of Andreadis and act as Helios’ guardian in the States, protecting him until he was of legal age.
Rick had been an outcast in Greek’s rich society, disinherited by his own family because he had been gay. But to Helios and the first members of Afxisi, Rick had been the perfect parent – one who had loved them unconditionally, one who had never given up on them even when he was made to suffer for it.
“That’s all Rick would tell me. That the day she saw you save him changed everything for her.”
It was just one shock after another. Helios shook his head in disbelief. “Rick knows her?”
“That’s not the most important thing I discovered. Nor the most painful…” Yuri glanced towards MJ. “Her father used to be a famous racer, but when an injury ended his career, he became an alcoholic. One of his favorite pastimes when he was under influence was riding his bike over...” Yuri gestured towards MJ, unable to speak of something so damn inhuman.
Helios felt sick to his guts as he listened to Yuri narrate the injuries MJ had sustained as a child because of her father’s stunts.
Several stitches to her head…
Hair needed to be cut, leaving her half-bald when she was thirteen…
Broken bones…
“Where. Is. Her. Father?” If he ever found out where the bastard was, Helios would tear him apart limb from limb.
“Her father was recently released from prison, and I hear he’s been looking for her. He has somehow managed to have a connection with Manolito Chavez.” Yuri spoke of a millionaire long suspected of earning ill-gotten gains from human trafficking.
Hallie asked shakily, “How did she manage to live all those years?”
“Thankfully, he still had her enrolled in school, and records show that she’s been quite dedicated. She’s also a damn good photographer.”
Yuri paused. It was hard to say the next thing he had to reveal to the others. “The reason she was able to buy an expensive professional camera was by taking pictur
es of her wounds and selling it online…”
Yuri walked towards the table and emptied the contents of the brown envelope he had brought with him. Photos scattered on the table. Kellion, usually the most laidback, cursed when he realized what the photos were. Andreus pulled Hallie towards him as she cried out in horror.
All of the photos were of MJ.
And all of it were of her, bleeding.
He knew that part of her shoulder. And it was dislocated.
He knew that part of her arm. It had a mole. And on the photo, the skin was ripped red and raw.
Too much fucking blood.
Helios wanted to throw up. His agonized gaze went to MJ.
How could he ever make it up to her?
How?
****
It was dark when she first opened her eyes. Shadows on the wall seemed to be her only company inside the room. When she lifted her hand, MJ stared with numb curiosity at the IV strapped to her veins.
She was in a hospital.
She turned her head around, and her breath caught.
Helios.
He had his head down, sleeping on his arm, his golden hair left loose against his shoulders. She wanted to cry at the sight of it. So stupid, but she really did. She had a feeling she would never again feel how soft it was.
She must have made a sound, because the next thing she knew, Helios was awake, and too many expressions registered on his face all at once. Shock, relief, fear, and…something…something that seemed tender.
MJ didn’t want that last emotion. It was a lie. It had to be lie.
She might have suffered from a nasty injury, but it did not come with amnesia. She remembered everything. No matter how much she wanted to forget and pretend it wasn’t true, she remembered that Helios hated her.
“MJ?”
It was so rare for her to hear him speak her name. Why now when there was no need for it? She whispered, “My father used to ask me to do this…thing.” She didn’t care if he didn’t understand her. This was the only time she would speak to him about it, the last time she would ever talk to Helios again.
