“Wait,” Oringo said. “Because big man Zakai needs time to process his feelings, I can’t be with you either?”
“Don’t be vulgar,” I said. “We all have to respect the feelings of one another for this to work.”
“I do respect his feelings,” Oringo said. “But he has to respect mine. I love you and am already committed to you. Why should I have to be denied your company because of him?”
“It is only for a little while,” I said. “Please be patient.”
“It’s been days,” Oringo said. “How long are we going to wait? What if he never comes around? I’m not going to wait for months.”
“Too bad you already committed to me until the end of your life,” I said, crossing my arms and raising an eyebrow.
“Damn, girl!” Oringo said, kicking at the air to show his displeasure.
I rolled my eyes. “Can’t you act more mature? You don’t see Saleem getting upset. He understands.”
“Just because I do not lash out as Oringo does not mean I disagree with him,” Saleem said to my surprise. “You are committed to us too. Both of us. There has to be a way for you to reciprocate our feelings while not offending Zakai. We all love each other. That cannot be put on hold just because one person doesn’t like it. Our relationships exist separately from one another, do they not? You and I love each other and desire to express that love regardless of your relationship Oringo. Why does that same courtesy not extend to Zakai?”
“Yeah!” Oringo said, crossing his arms in victory, obviously pleased that Saleem was on his side. “Regardless!”
“I will not submit my body to anyone just because you demand it!” I said with a stomp of my own foot, my frustration showing. “That is not love. That is servitude.”
“I think you forget just how much you like submitting to me,” Oringo said, wiggling his eyebrows.
“Get out,” I said. “Both of you. This is a pointless argument. I will not be told when or how or who to love.”
“Sanura,” they both said at the same time, irritation in their voices.
“And send Zakai to me,” I said. “The least he can do is show me respect as his queen.”
Oringo and Saleem both gave me quick short bows and left the tent. I’m sure they would have slammed the door if one existed. In truth, I did understand their feelings. I missed them too; I was just better at hiding it. And sex was one of the last things on my mind. But I wanted all three of my men to be happy, not just two of them. How could I make love to Oringo or Saleem knowing that it caused Zakai pain?
“You sent for me, Your Majesty?” Zakai asked as he opened the flap to the tent.
I gave him a broad smile. “Yes, would you like some wine?”
He looked around at the empty cups, including the one I had dropped to the floor. “Maybe you have already had enough.”
“Oh, that was an accident,” I said, picking up the cup and wiping the sand from it as I placed it on the table. “You were missed for the evening report.”
“I did not think you needed me,” he said. “Oringo is the head of the army, not me.”
“But I value your counsel,” I said. “And even though the Anwe are a small portion of the army, their thoughts are important to me. In the future, I expect you to be here as well.”
He gave me a respectful bow. “Yes, Your Majesty.” As he stood back up, there was an awkward pause. He looked down from my eyes to my breasts and tried to subtly lick his lips. “Anything else?” he finally asked.
I reached my hand out to him. “I’ve missed you.”
He sighed and looked at my proffered hand. It was clear he wanted to take it, but something was holding him back.
“I’ve missed you too,” he finally said.
“Then come to me,” I said. “You know we belong together.”
“Sanura,” he said, “you know that if things were different, there would not be this distance between us.”
“It is pretty to imagine, isn’t it?” I said. “That in another life we could be husband and wife.”
“In Anwe or in Egypt?” he asked.
“As long as we are imagining a perfect life,” I said, “I suppose we would live in both.”
He chuckled. “I thought you would say Egypt. Your every thought seems to be there.”
“Your happiness is just as important to me as my own,” I said. “I know you are hurting, you must believe that.”
“I do,” he said. “At least in my head I do.”
“But in your heart?” I asked.
“My heart…is a fool,” he said. “Here you are before me, offering me all I want in this world, but I cannot take it.”
“Why?” I asked.
“I cannot think of you without thinking of…them,” he said, a small growl to his voice.
“Just because my love is not exclusive to you does not mean it is incomplete,” I said. “Right now, I am only thinking of you.”
He shook his head. “I wish I knew how you were able to do that.”
“There is no trick to it,” I said. “Only love. Please, let me love you.”
Zakai stepped forward tentatively. He reached out and lightly stroked my arms, causing my skin to break out in gooseflesh and I let out a small moan.
“I have missed you so much,” I said, tears pricking at the edge of my eyes.
“And I you,” he said, placing his forehead against mine. “All those months you were gone, I could not stop dreaming of the moment we would come together again. Just like this.”
I reached up and pulled his head down, our lips meeting. But as much as I wanted to crash together, he still held back, kissing me only lightly, then pulling away completely.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I know Oringo and Saleem were here. I…I just cannot…”
I looked away and wiped at the tears that threatened to fall. “I’m sorry too,” I said. “I do not mean to hurt you. But I cannot hurt them either.” I turned back to face him. “They have stayed away out of respect for you and your people. But I cannot deny them forever.”
“I know,” he said. “You do not need to push them away on my account. Even if you ended your relationships with them completely, I would need time to open myself up to you again.”
“I’ll wait for you,” I said. “For as long as you need.”
“I know,” he said, and then he left.
10
That night, I did not invite Oringo or Saleem back to my tent. I needed the rest and they both needed to cool off. But the next night, after the evening report—which Zakai did attend—I spent the night with Saleem. Oringo was annoyed, but when he came to my bed the next night, I let him dominate me to his heart’s content. After that, Saleem and Oringo alternated nights with me, just as we had before when we traveled to Anwe from Zululand. I knew it hurt Zakai, but I could no longer deny Oringo or Saleem, both for their benefit and mine. I wanted them as much as they wanted me. But during the day, I deferred to Zakai often, letting him know through my words and actions how much I still missed him. And that I would never stop missing him until I held him in my arm again.
The months of traveling to Luxor were full of pleasure and pain. But finally, as we traveled along the Nile River, we reached Egypt. At first, my heart sang. But when I saw the state of my country, my heart was broken once again.
The cities along southern Egypt were in ruins. They had been largely deserted, though whether the people had fled or been taken captive was not clear. The few people who remained were mostly children, the elderly, or people who had been injured. We delivered aid to those we could and allowed some to join the camp followers who were responsible for providing food and medical care. The others we gave whatever food we could spare and then vowed to return after we had taken Luxor.
“My lady,” an old man said to me as I offered him some bread and thin soup, all I could spare from the army’s rations. “We knew you would come back to us.”
I kneeled by his side. His face was weathered like ol
d leather, his clothes nearly worn through, and his bones nearly poked through his papery skin.
“I am sorry it took me so long to arrive,” I said. “The sorceress Keket used her power to banish me. I was alone and hundreds of miles from home.”
“When people said that you had killed the pharaoh, I knew it was not true,” the man said. “I saw you often, looking out over the city from your balcony. Your eyes showed such awe, such wonder for the world below you. I knew there was nothing so evil in your heart.”
“What happened here?” I asked. “After I was banished?”
“It was so confusing at first,” he said. “The bonds of the slaves simply fell apart, as though the iron had rusted over thousands of years. The people were afraid. But when the masters tried to lock the slaves up again, the same thing happened. It was then that the slaves knew they were free. Then the riots began.” The man shook his head, as though it was painful to recall what happened next.
“What of Keket?” I asked. “And the Pharaoh Ramses?”
“When Ramses was proclaimed pharaoh,” the man said, “we thought he would restore order. But nothing happened. In fact, they got worse. The nobles fled, and the army rounded up the able-bodied men and women and took them to Luxor.”
“Why?” I asked.
“For some building project,” the man said. “But that was the job of the slaves before she freed them. But now, slave and free man were taken away to labor on whatever Keket wanted in Luxor. I don’t think Keket or Ramses knows what they are doing.”
“I might have to agree with you there,” I said with a chuckle.
“But for the first time since the death of the pharaoh,” the man continued with a twinkle in his eye, “we have hope again.”
“That is something we have in common, friend,” I said and left him to finish his much-needed meal.
I wandered among the people. Many, like the old man, seemed glad to see me, but it could have just been the food we were distributing they were happy to see. If Keket wanted to be queen, starving her people was the wrong approach. Enslaving them to work on her temple or pyramid or whatever after she had already freed them was also foolish. What was she doing?
Some of the people looked at me questioningly, as though they were not sure they could trust me. I was certain they had all heard the rumors that I had killed the pharaoh. And now I was here with an army. It would make sense for some of them to question my motives. It was most likely clear that Keket was not good for the people of Egypt. But in their minds, was I much better? They had endured nothing but suffering for many months. They had probably lost faith in the monarchy, and even the gods themselves.
I noticed that many of the temples in the cities had been abandoned. The priests and priestesses were gone and the idols and other precious items had been looted. Had Keket forced the priests and priestesses to slave away on her building projects as well? It was sacrilegious to abuse the servants of the gods in such a way. But it seemed that Keket did not concern herself with offending the gods. Why did they allow her to rule without punishment? I had to hope that I was the source of their vengeance, and that the people would stand behind me when I finally faced the source of all my difficulties.
As we approached Luxor, my heart was in my nose. I could see the magnificent obelisks and temples from several miles away. The rising dust signaling the movements of countless people. The smells of roasting meat and animal dung filled my nose. It was beautiful.
“The city is within sight, Your Majesty,” Oringo said. “Should we take our positions?”
“Yes,” I said. “We will make camp here. We can plan our attacks from this distance—”
The wind suddenly whipped up around us, causing the sand to swirl around.
“No!” I yelled, jumping from my horse. “Don’t let her banish me again! I’m so close!”
Zakai, Oringo, and Saleem all ran to my side, forming a protective ring around me. They held me tightly and I felt safe in their arms.
“Look!” one of the soldiers yelled.
I peeked out from over Saleem’s shoulder and saw the sand collecting in one spot. It spun around tighter and tighter, forming a small shape. The shape developed arms and hair. Then it formed legs and began walking toward me. Finally, the sand died down and Keket stood before me.
“At last, Sanura,” Keket said. “You have come.”
The men stood aside and I stepped toward her, but not too close. She was the same person, slight, dark-skinned, striking green eyes. But her bearing was completely different. She stood tall and proud. She did not wear the plain brown dress of a slave, but one of Anat’s finest gowns. She had also painted her face with cosmetics that made her eyes shine even brighter. She looked older, braver, stronger.
“We could have gotten this over with months ago if you had not banished me in the first place,” I said.
Keket wiped some sand from one of her arms. “An unfortunate mistake,” she said. “I read the spell wrong. It was supposed to banish you to hell.”
“Why?” I asked. “Why banish me at all? What did I ever do to you?”
She sighed and rolled her eyes. “Must I really list the litany of all the wrongs you and your ancestors have committed over the centuries that led me into your service that day? Your power only exists because it was built on the abuse of slaves. On the slaughter of other people. On the ruin of other cultures. Well, Egypt’s rampant march over the world has come to an end. All that remains is killing you.”
“So, you do not mean to rule Egypt?” I asked. “You only want to destroy it?”
“And I’ve done a marvelous job, don’t you think?” she asked with a laugh.
“What about Ramses?” I asked. “He cannot possibly be allowing you to destroy all that his father built.”
“Why don’t you ask him yourself?” she said. She twirled her fingers and the sand coiled around her until it formed a massive snake.
“Ramses!” I called out when he then took his human form. It took all my self-control not to run to him.
“Hello, sister,” he hissed, his face twisted in anger.
“Ramses,” I said, “do not listen to that witch. She has told you nothing but lies.”
“So, you do think I am capable of ruling on my own?” he asked.
My face fell. Of course he could not rule on his own. Even Father knew that, which was why we were betrothed to each other.
“Father meant for us to rule together,” I diplomatically said. “Neither of us was supposed to rule alone.”
“Well, I am not ruling alone,” he said. “I have Keket. I don’t need you.”
“But Keket wants to destroy Egypt,” I said. “What will you be pharaoh of then?”
“The world,” Ramses said. “Egypt is only the beginning.”
“Ramses,” I said. “No. You cannot do this. Think about Father. About Mother. What would they say? What will they say when you meet them in Aaru?”
“They will be proud of me,” Ramses said. “I will have surpassed every pharaoh who came before me in power and fame. Just wait, sister. Just wait.”
“No,” I said. “I have no fight with you. I will always defer to you as pharaoh. But I will not allow Keket to destroy Egypt, or any other land. I will stop her!”
“As your pharaoh,” Ramses said, “I order you and your army to stand down.”
I hesitated. Not because I doubted my answer or my cause, but because it had come to this. My whole life had been dedicated to supporting Egypt and the line of pharaohs. Now, in order to save my country, I had to defy my pharaoh.
I finally shook my head. “No,” I said. “I cannot do that.”
Ramses’s face twisted in fury. “I am your pharaoh!” he screamed. “Bow before me! Submit to me!”
I stayed calm. “No,” I said. “I will not stop until Keket has been removed from power.”
“You never loved me!” he cried, and I realized he was angry and hurt.
“I love you more than any other
living person,” I said. “I am your sister. No one will ever love you the way I do.”
“Then prove it,” he said. “Bow to me and do as I command.”
“I show you my love by never stopping in my fight for you,” I said as I got down on one knee. “I will stop Keket, and then you and I will rule Egypt side by side with you as it should be.”
He panted, but he did not rail back at me. He looked at Keket, then back to me, as though he were conflicted.
“Ramses,” I said, holding my hand out to him. “Come to me. We can defeat her together.”
He rubbed his head, as he often did when he was confused or frustrated by a problem he couldn’t solve.
“San…Sanura,” he said, and I could hear the anguish in his voice. I raised both my arms to him, beckoning me to him.
Keket placed her hand on his shoulder. “She only wants to be queen,” Keket said. “The Lioness of Egypt. But you are the cobra. You are strong and fast and look at what you have already accomplished.”
“I only ever wanted to be your queen, Ramses,” I said, trying to counteract the lies in her words, lies that he was falling for.
“Oh, really?” Keket asked. “Then those men you are with, the so-called lion kings, those men aren’t your lovers?”
I glanced over at Zakai, Oringo, and Saleem, all standing protectively behind me.
“They are my friends,” I said. “My allies. My army. They brought me back to you, Ramses.”
“And they are also your lovers, aren’t they?” Keket pressed. I didn’t respond.
“That’s not true, is it, Sanura?” my brother pleaded.
I knew that if I told him what he wanted to hear, he would come to me. But I couldn’t do that. I couldn’t lie to him. And I couldn’t deny my love for my lion kings—no matter what the cost.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “But I do love them.”
Ramses screamed in anger, but also in pain. “I’ll kill you!” he yelled. “I’ll kill all of you!”
I could not stop the tears from falling at his words. “Ramses, please,” I tried as I stood back up. “But I love you too. Just talk to me. Let me explain.”
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