by Kelli Walker
“You’re lucky to be alive, you know,” Dr. Goldstein said.
“Yeah. So I keep being reminded of,” I said.
“You know that bodyguard of yours was the deciding factor, in my opinion.”
I felt the hand cupping and supporting the back of my neck stiffen.
“What?” I asked.
“Your bodyguard shielded you from the rest of the shrapnel that fell into your face after the explosion. Do you remember any of it?” Goldstein asked.
“Bits and pieces,” I said.
“In my professional opinion, he’s the reason you’re alive.”
I nodded my head as the hand of my stranger eased me back to the bed.
“Are my eyes going to get any better? Or is this all it will be?” I asked.
“Don’t get discouraged. You know you have to keep a positive disposition. Your mental state is as important as your physical state,” Goldstein said.
“Give it to me straight. I need people to stop reminding me of my apparent immortality and give me something straight up.”
My doctor finished off my bandages before he sighed and took my hand.
“Only time is going to tell, Charity. If your sight does fully come back, it will take weeks to do so. But, I’m holding out hope. The fact that you’ve only been healing from your last surgery for less than a week and you can already see shaded outlines is a good thing. A very good thing. We’re going to keep you on this high fat diet and keep any outside stimulation from making your eyes work too hard. The rest is up to your body and your mind,” Goldstein said.
“How much longer will I be here again?” I asked breathlessly.
“If it’s up to me, however long it takes for us to figure out whether or not you’re getting your sight back. I know what’s hinging on this. I know your career is at risk right now. I don’t want you leaving this hospital until you have all the answers you could possibly have.”
I curled my hand tightly around his.
“Thank you so much, Graham,” I whispered.
“Of course, Charity. Of course.”
I listened as my doctor left the room and I felt defeat settle in my bones. I knew I needed to keep my head up, but it was hard. I wanted to cry. I wanted to curl up into a ball and sob into my pillow. The tears that rose behind my closed eyelids burned more than they ever had at that point. I wanted to claw my eyes out. Because at least that would give me an answer as to where my life was headed from this point forward.
I sniffled as the bed beside me depressed, and soon I felt the hot embrace of my stranger’s hand.
I tugged on his hand, and it was as if he knew exactly what I needed. I shifted over in bed and I heard the gears of my hospital bed groan with his weight. He shuffled in next to me. He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me into him. I felt my face fall against his very broad chest. The man was massive.
Just like Rocco.
“What is your name?” I asked.
My stranger chuckled. “The mystery wearing off?”
“I need something to root me. Something to ground me. I feel…”
“Vulnerable?”
“Yeah. Insecure. Unsure. Like I’m hanging in limbo. I don’t like hanging. I don’t like things that pick my feet off the ground.”
“Neither do it. I’m always too heavy for those rides anyway,” he said.
“You feel like a big man,” I said.
“Hey now. That doesn’t sound nice.”
I giggled, pressing my cheek further into his chest. “You feel… familiar.”
I felt him stiffen against me again, and it made me nervous.
“What should I call you?” I asked.
“Most people, other than my best friend, call me by my last name.”
“Which would be…?”
The man drew in a deep breath. “Taylor.”
“Okay, Taylor. I want you to do something for me today.”
“Shoot.”
“I don’t want you to read to me. I’ve got some tests ahead of me and I want to rest before them. But, what I’d like you to do is track down a man by the name of Rocco,” I said.
There was a pause before his voice filled the space around us.
“Rocco,” he said.
“Yep. He’s a bodyguard for--.”
What was that company’s name?
I cocked my head to the side and images flashed against my mind. Sparks flying. A door coming off its hinges. My feet, raising off the ground. I clung to Taylor, fisting his shirt in my hand. I didn’t like being picked up off my feet. Not unless it was him.
Not unless it was with his strength.
Focus on Rocco. Focus on Rocco.
I pushed the images off to the side and remembered the time I first met him. His stern eyes. His thick eyebrows. His hooded figure. His downturned lips. My memory fell to his badge. Where I had first seen his name through the side window of my front door.
But the second I recalled my front door, it was in front of me again. Knocking me off my feet. Hurtling me through the air.
“It’s okay. I’m right here. I’ve got you. Settle down, Charity. You’re shaking.”
I swallowed hard and pulled myself from my thoughts. I couldn’t remember the damn company he worked for. I felt Taylor’s hand around mine, slowly massaging my skin and trying to get me to release his shirt. My face hurt more than it ever had. It throbbed for no reason. Searing pain rocketed down the back of my neck for no reason.
I felt like I was floating, and it made me sick.
“I’ll find him, Charity,” Taylor said.
His voice pierced through my emotional haze and pulled me away from the ledge I teetered on. I felt my hand release his shirt. I felt my body settle down. My hands trembled, but the rest of my body felt rooted. Grounded. Safe and protected against his.
Just like Rocco.
“Whenever I find Rocco, what do you want me to tell him?” Taylor asked.
I settled my quivering lip so I could spit out what I wanted to say to the man.
“Tell him how thankful I am for him saving my life. When I’m out of this hospital, I want to repay him in some fashion. I’m not sure how or anything, but I want to. And I don’t want him to harbor any sort of guilt for what I’m going through. It isn’t his fault. If anything, it’s apparently a fact that I’m alive because of him,” I said.
“Do you have anything else you want to say?” he asked.
I paused, then I slowly shook my head against his chest.
“Then, I’ll get on it,” he said.
“Will you… stay here for a second. Just one more minute?” I asked.
I felt Taylor pull me closer into him, shifting a little more into my bed.
“I’ll stay here for as long as you need,” he said.
I had no idea how I was feeling right now. The roiling of emotions bombarding my system were more confusing than they had ever been. I was used to having control of them. For being able to emotionally remove myself from scenarios in order to get the job done. It was what made me a damn good doctor. It was what made me a fantastic surgeon. It was why I had a perfect record in the O.R., until Skylar Lane and his dumbass came along. And now, I was laid up in the hospital in the arms of one man who reminded me of another. A man whose presence I enjoyed even though I couldn’t see his face. A man who, by all accounts, I secretly wished to be someone else.
I hadn’t relied on anyone since I buried my parents. And now, within the space of two or three weeks, I had relied on two separate men to help me. One to protect me, and the other to help me do the basest of things.
I allowed my mind to relax and I let it scroll through how I was feeling. The carnal desires I’d felt for Rocco and the comforting relaxation I felt with Taylor. I was the epitome of the fucking damsel in distress, and it made me disgusted with myself. Hopping from man to man like I didn’t know how to run my own damn life. There was no way I truly felt what I did for two different men in the span of a few days. It was insane
.
I wasn’t that kind of woman. This was simply because my life had been threatened.
It’s only happening because you have no other choice.
I had no other choice but to rely on Rocco for my protection. I had no other choice but to rely on Taylor for assistance while I couldn’t see.
Rocco. Taylor.
Rocco Taylor. Taylor Rocco.
I had no idea why that name sounded so familiar, and it pissed me off. I had no idea why I felt so safe with this strange man I didn’t even know, and it frustrated me. I couldn’t remember any sort of shit I needed to, and it made me irate with myself.
I knew damn good and well I was missing something. I knew damn good and well my mind was betraying me. My eyes betrayed me. My strength betrayed me. My memories were betraying me over and over again.
I felt so many things at once, and it became hard to breathe. Hard to swallow. Hard to think straight. So instead, I relaxed against Taylor and allowed myself to fall asleep.
Maybe my dreams would reveal to me what my conscious mind refused to recall.
Rocco
I was stunned to my core. I had no idea what to say. I held against my body the most incredible woman in the world, and I was being a scared little asshole. I had learned so much about her over the past couple of weeks. While she was under my protection. While she was in my care at the hospital. And the more I learned, the more beautiful she became. I looked down at her, watching her rest against my chest. I rose my hand and cupped her cheek, wanting nothing more than to feel her delicate skin against mine. I felt her jerk. Like I had startled her awake. And instantly, she nuzzled into my touch. Pressed deeper into me, as if her body simply longed to be locked with mine.
I tilted her face slowly up to mine, gazing into where those yellow-speckled eyes would have been.
“Why do you feel so familiar?” Charity whispered.
I ran my finger over her lower lip. The wetness of her pout sent fire trickling through the marrow of my bones. It started out as a slow, dull slide. Slipping down my arms and impeding on my spine. It filtered through my legs and made its way to my toes, making them curl in my fucking boots.
And that was simply my thumb on her lips.
I couldn't keep hiding from her. It was cowardice of me. Yes, I’d had my heart broken once, but she was worth the risk. Charity was worth whatever fate might come of us. If there was the slightest chance that she was going to be blind for the rest of her life, then she didn’t need to be blinded by anything around her.
“Because it’s me, Charity,” I said.
I felt her cock her head deeper into my hand, watching as her brow stitched together in confusion.
“It’s who?” she asked.
“It’s me. Rocco,” I said.
Her cheek twitched. “Rocco?”
“Yes. Rocco Taylor. Your bodyguard.”
“You’re…?”
I couldn't see her eyes, but I felt her body. I watched her eyebrows relax before they rose on her head. I watched her perfect pout part further and further, her jaw dropping in shock. Her hand raced up to mine, cupping around my hand as I held her cheek. I was terrified she’d yank my touch away. Push me off the hospital bed and demand I get out. But instead, I watched her chest jump. I felt her shivering as she turned her lips into my palm. She cradled my hand as her lips pressed into it, trembling at the very touch of my skin. I watched her every move. I followed her every bodily movement.
And when she nuzzled her cheek back into my hand, I watched as a tear tinged in blood leaked from beyond the bandages over her eyes.
“It’s you,” she whispered, smiling.
She was smiling. That was good.
Right?
“You’re the one who’s been helping me,” she said.
I slipped down into bed with her, bringing her forehead to mine. Lying on my side with my arm underneath her head to cradle her. I felt her chest jumping with her muted tears against my body as I held her close. I stroked her cheek with my thumb, wiping away the bloody tear leaking down her skin. I watched the gauze around her eyes become wet as faded red pierced through the top layer. She hadn’t pushed me away. She hadn’t ordered me to get out.
And as our foreheads nestled against one another’s, I felt our hearts collide.
“Why didn’t you tell me before?” Charity asked.
“Fear.”
She snickered. “Fear of what, you idiot?”
I chuckled, my lips hovering as my nose nuzzled against hers. I breathed the very air she allowed me. I felt her body scoot closer to me as the hospital bed groaned and creaked underneath her movements. Her hand slipped up my chest, rumbling over my abs and settled right against my heart. I felt it banging against my chest, threatening to break open my sternum and leap straight into her body.
“What is the big, bad, bodyguard so afraid of?” Charity whispered, her fingers tapping against my racing heart.
And all at once, the answer wafted from my lips.
“Losing you,” I murmured.
I closed the gap between us, pressing our lips together. And before I knew it, her tongue pressed against my lips. Begging for entrance before I had the chance to ask. I rolled underneath her, pulling her on top of me as I supported her body. Her hands fisted my shirt again, only this time they shook for a different reason. I cloaked her back with my arms as I held her softly, not wanting to put her in anymore pain.
But when she whimpered against my lips, I felt my walls come crumbling down.
I eased us up, contracting my abs and carrying the weight of us both effortlessly. I cradled her in my lap as my hand slid up, cupping the back of her head. I wrapped my free arm around her waist as our tongues collided. I felt her toned legs straddle my lap. I slid my tongue along her cheeks. Around her teeth. Over the roof of her mouth. I wanted to memorize how she felt. How she tasted. What she sounded like as I kissed her harder.
I felt her pout swelling against mine, and it was the most incredible sensation I’d ever encountered.
“Oh, Rocco,” she groaned.
I held her against my body as she collapsed into my arms. She threaded her arms around my neck, pulling herself closer into my form. Her curves--covered by the hospital gown--poured over into the edges of my body. I felt my cock jerking to life. Pulsing and aching for a woman my soul had relented to. I was weak against her. I knew I’d never be able to resist her. Not that I wanted to. I never wanted to say ‘no’ to this woman. I nibbled on her lower lip, sliding my teeth across it before I finally pulled away. I nuzzled against her nose as my hands wandered slowly over her back.
Our foreheads fell back together as we both gasped for air, trying to catch our breath.
“Don’t you ever hide from me like that again,” Charity commanded.
I nodded my head against hers before I captured her lips with mine.
“I promise you that,” I said.
“You should have never done that.”
“I know. I know I should’ve told you it was me,” I said.
“There are so many things I want to--.”
I pulled back, my eyes dancing along her face as she drew in a deep breath. She let it out with a sigh, like she was debating on whether or not to say what was on her mind. I knew I didn’t have a right to demand it. A right to ask of it. Not after keeping up my barriers with her for so long. But, I wanted to know what was on that intelligent mind of hers.
I wanted her to have mercy and grant me access.
“Well, since the task I asked of you earlier is sort of pointless, I’ve got something different for you.”
I smiled as I nuzzled my nose against hers again.
“Oh, really? And what is that?” I asked.
“You’re to stay in bed with me until my tests this afternoon,” Charity said.
I laid us back down in bed, settling her head against my chest. I reached down for her thighs and slipped her legs between mine, allowing her body to nestle into me. To fall wherever it may.
And it shouldn't have shocked me that she fit like a glove. My body dipped where hers needed more room, and it swelled where she needed more support. I tugged at the blanket underneath us until I freed it, then slid it over the two of us. She tucked her head underneath my chin. She laid against my body with her arms wrapped around me. I ran my fingers through her hair, kissing the top of her head as I stared up at the ceiling.
“I wouldn’t be anywhere else,” I said.
And when she pressed a small kiss into my chest, my heart sang with delight.
Charity
“Come on. We gotta get you walking,” Rocco said.
“But my legs hurt. I mean, more than they do usually,” I said.
“Because they aren’t being worked. You have to work your muscles so they don’t stiffen,” he said.
“They didn’t hurt like this when I popped my eyes open after a week of laying here.”
“Because I was moving your muscles for you.”
I whipped my head over to the sound of Rocco’s voice. My brow furrowed as I felt him approach me. His hand came down onto my arm and he raised me from my bed. His other hand guided my legs off the side of the bed before his hands took mine. I felt my brow wrinkling further as he stood me to my feet. Helped me to steady myself before linking my arm with his.
“You what?” I asked.
“Nothing. It’s not important,” Rocco said.
“It’s important to me. What did you do while I was lying here?”
Rocco sighed as he took the first step, leading me around my bed.
“Maybe we should talk about this after you’re done walking. Okay?” he asked.
“That’s fine. Maybe over dinner. But, we’re going to talk about that little thing that just slipped.”
“Fair enough.”
As Rocco gently walked me to the door, I felt my feet shuffle out into the hallway. I was getting used to not seeing. Well, as used to it as I could get. I’d been in the hospital for two weeks now, and my senses had heightened. I heard things I didn’t usually do and my sense of touch was more sensitive than it had ever been. I felt the slightest flutter of the hairs on my arms and was constantly running my hands over them. Thinking there was a bug on me or something. Sleeping at night when I was told to rest was harder than ever. Every sound felt like it had been multiplied. And don’t get me started on my sense of taste.
