by K. J. Dahlen
“I can’t explain it, either.” Bastian sighed. “Normally, I use people’s fears to get what I want. I use their own fears against them but I couldn’t do that to you. I wanted to know all your secrets but I couldn’t do it the same way as always. I watched you when you slept and I imagined what you tasted like, what you looked like but when I saw you and felt you… when I tasted you for the first time I knew I couldn’t give you up. You came alive in my arms and I knew then you belonged to me.”
Sawyer leaned back into his arms. “You were my first and only. When you touched me, I didn’t want to run away. I never felt that way before.”
“Is that all you felt?”
Sawyer shook her head. “It’s hard to explain…” She got to her feet and moved away from the bench. Wringing her hands together, she turned to confess. Her eyes were still closed as if she knew she shouldn’t look at him. “I never wanted anyone to touch me before. I remember when I was little and my dad was still with us. They were so happy. My world was complete back then, then I watched my mom when he rode away and left us behind. He broke her heart. Then Max came around. I may have been too young to know about men and women at that time but I saw the way my mother cringed when he touched her. She didn’t want him and he knew it. He screamed at her that one day she would beg him to touch her and then the shoe would be one the other foot but that day never came for him. She tried to find happiness with Jordan’s father but Max murdered him for taking what was his. My mother lived most of my life with no one to lean on except me and Jordan. She loved me and Jordan but I knew she wanted my father back, he was to her kind of like you are to me. She only wanted his touch the same as I only want yours.”
Bastian got up and went to her. Wrapping his arms around her he spoke softly, “I’m glad you only want my touch. I want to be the only man that touches your sweet body.”
“Can we touch now?” she asked shyly. “I want to see if I remember your touch. It’s been so long…” She groaned.
Bastian smiled. “I want you like I’ve never wanted anything before. I want to sink into your body and explode into mindlessness. I want to taste your skin and suckle your breasts. I want to consume your essence and mark you as mine to the whole world. I want to taste your soul and make it my own.”
Sawyer groaned and her knees buckled.
Bastian held her up and his hands stroked her. He felt her skin break out in goosebumps.
She shivered but she didn’t pull away. “I want you to do all that and so much more.”
Bastian sighed loudly. “I want all of that but I want so much more too.”
“What more?” she whispered.
“I want you every day for the rest of our lives. I want the right to all your nights and days. I don’t want to wonder where you are ever again. I want you right beside me.”
“I want that too. But you know we can’t do that. All we can have are stolen moments like this and if this is all we can have I’m okay with that.”
“Maybe I’m not…Maybe I want more.”
Sawyer laid her head against his shoulder. “I want more too, but we can’t.”
Bastian turned her around and raised her face to his. “Open your eyes.”
Sawyer stilled. “But I’ll see you.”
“I know. You’ll see me but not the real me. I need to see your eyes for the first time and I want you to see this part of who I am.”
Sawyer slowly opened her eyes. Wonder shone in her brown orbs as she skimmed over his features. She closed her eyes again and leaned toward him. Taking a deep breath, she inhaled his scent and smiled. Opening her eyes, she just stared at him for a moment. “It is you. It really is you. You’re here and I can see you.”
Bastian chuckled. “It’s really me.” He lifted his hands and cupped her face. “I’m here and this time, I’m not letting you go.” He grabbed her hand and pulled her down the path to the parking lot. Opening the door to his car, he helped her in and moving around to the driver’s side, he got inside. His hands tightened on the steering wheel and for a moment, he couldn’t move. What am I doing? He knew better, but he just could not stop.
Taking a deep breath, he did his usual checklist before he started the car. His eyes skimmed the area and took note of everything and anything. Knowing what he faced was better than being caught unprepared. When he finally pulled out into traffic, his mind had slipped into survival mode.
He checked his phone and wasn’t surprised to find an address in the text section. Driving to the address, he led Sawyer to the house. Grabbing the keys from the mailbox, he opened the door and led her inside.
He knew Jim would have everything ready for him. Swinging her around in his arms, his lips immediately descended on hers and they both lost touch as the kiss they shared lit a wildfire deep inside.
Sawyer groaned and grabbed his shoulders digging her fingertips into his skin. Bastian’s hold tightened to the point where he could feel her heart pounding in her chest. His finger tightened around the back of her head and he stepped forward a few steps to back her into the wall.
His lips slid down to her throat and he heard her moan. His one hand wrapped around her throat but not to hurt her, while his other hand slid down to cup her breast. Kneading her flesh, he caught his breath as desire blazed through him.
Ripping her sundress down, he freed her unbound breasts to his touch. His mouth slipped down her chest and when his lips wrapped around her nipple, he groaned. He thought he remembered her taste but this was better than he remembered. Her natural aroma of chocolate and citrus blended well with her woman’s scent. His fingers touched briefly the pendant she wore under her clothes. He smiled as his fingers curled around the stone he’d given her before he gave her back to her father. No one but him knew the secret of the pendant and that was his secret to keep.
His hand slid up her thigh and under her skirt. Her bare legs offered no resistance and his fingers slid under the band of her underwear. He could feel the dampness of her skin and the fine hair protecting her womanhood.
She opened her legs and his fingers sank into her core. She was already wet for him and he dived deep.
Sawyer hissed and sank her teeth into the side of his neck. “Please…” she begged. “I need you inside me.”
Bastian suckled her breast and his fingers fumbled with his belt and zipper. His cock was so hard he could barely release it from his pants. Shoving his jeans down his thighs, he moved in and before another moment passed, he rammed himself deep into her body.
Sawyer gasped at the intrusion and sank deeper pulling him into her body. She cried out as he grunted into her neck with each stroke. Her core temperature heated as the friction between them escalated.
Bastian felt electricity rip through his body as his climax built up inside him. Home, he was finally home. He could feel her fingers digging into his shoulders.
“Oh god, I’m s-so close,” she panted brokenly.
“Let it go,” he urged. “I need to feel you come apart on me.”
Sawyer threw her head back against the wall and screamed as her body shattered.
Bastian felt her grip squeeze his cock and he felt his balls tighten and then he felt his climax pouring into her. Wave after wave of his seed flooded her core until there wasn’t anymore. He felt drained as he let her slide down the wall to stand on her own feet.
“Wow…” she whispered after a moment to catch her breath. Sweat beaded her forehead and ran down the side of her face.
He chuckled briefly and held her close to him. “That is only the beginning,” he vowed.
Sawyer touched the side of his face gently. “I really wish we could have this everyday but what about all the stuff you told me months ago?”
Bastian stilled as the words he told her before slammed into his mind. He remembered telling her how his life was a secret for a reason, how his job only worked when no one knew what he looked like or where he called home. “I can’t give you up again.” He brushed her hair away from her face.
“I won’t give this up. We can go anywhere in the world, just the two of us. We can have this if we want it bad enough.”
Sawyer moved away from his embrace. Wrapping her arms around her body, she stared out the window but didn’t see anything. “And my family? The people who are important to me? Am I supposed to forget they exist?” She turned to him and stated, “I just got my father back and my mother is still recovering from being beaten almost to death. She doesn’t remember much of the life we had but I do. I remember living in fear and she was all I had before Jordan came to us. I can’t just leave them. I can’t turn my back on the people that mean the world to me. I’m sorry I just can’t do it.”
Bastian watched as tears fell from her eyes. He could feel her pulling away and he didn’t know how to stop it. He stepped closer to her and running his fingers down her cheek, he told her, “I’m not asking you to do that sweetheart. I just want you to let me in too. I’ve never done this before either. I’ve always lived alone because I have so many enemies. The work I do doesn’t make many friends. The people I go after have some dangerous associates and they would love to get their hands on me or the people I care about. If they knew about you, they could use you to get to me. They wouldn’t hesitate to hurt you or your family to get to me.” He paused then added, “Don’t you see? I don’t want anything or anyone to hurt you because they’re after me.”
More tears rolled down her face. “Then we can never really be together. I care very much about you but I don’t even know your name.”
Bastian closed his eyes and slammed his hand against the wall. “I love you damnit. I want a life with you but I can’t put you in danger. I won’t put you in danger.”
Sawyer reached out and touched the side of his face. “Then we’ll take all the stolen moments together we can get. If that’s all we can have than that’s fine with me as long as we can be together.”
“And when that isn’t enough? For either one of us?” he asked.
“Then we try something else but for now, this is all we have,” Sawyer reasoned.
“For now I’ll settle for this,” he vowed. “I need you again.”
Sawyer moved into his arms and surrendered to the lust in his eyes. It matched her own.
Hours later, Bastian drove her back to her car. It was getting late and she knew she had to return to the compound. He hadn’t wanted her to leave but she promised to return the next day.
He shut down the engine and hauled her over to his lap. Nuzzling her neck, he whispered, “I don’t want to let you go.”
Sawyer smiled. “I don’t want to go but I have to. I can’t just leave my family with no word.”
“Will you come back here tomorrow?”
“I promise. I just have to tell my parents that I’m leaving for a while.” Shaking her head she added, “I won’t tell them why or who I’ll be with. I’m an adult but I have to tell them something.”
“Will you be all right?”
Sawyer nodded. “I’m not sure they will be all right but I want as much time with you as I can get.”
Bastian lifted his head and carefully looked around the area. His eyes told him nothing was out of place but for some reason, his senses told him there was danger nearby. He’d learned long ago to listen to his senses but this time they just weren’t strong enough and he dismissed the feeling. “Will you call me later and let me know you got home ok?” he asked.
Sawyer nodded. “I’ll meet you here at nine in the morning. I want to spend the entire day with you.”
Bastian groaned and he ground his body against hers. “I can’t wait. Come back home with me tonight.”
Sawyer groaned. “I can’t. I have to let my family know I’m going away for a while.” She kissed him long and deep then she pulled her sweet lips away. “I’ll be back tomorrow.”
“You’d better be or I’ll tear this town down to find you,” he vowed.
Sawyer giggled and kissed him again, before she moved out of the car. Raising her fingers to her lips, she kissed them and placed them on his lips. Then she moved to her own vehicle and got inside.
He watched as she pulled away from the curb and drove away into the fading light.
Bastian didn’t move for a long time. He couldn’t get over the fact that he’d spent the afternoon with her again. He knew he shouldn’t have come here but he just couldn’t stay away from her. When he found her missing, he should have ignored it. There was something to be said for the sense of panic he felt before he found her safe and sound.
Now he knew he couldn’t walk away from her again. He knew he would have to convince her to leave with him and that was going to kill him. He didn’t want her to regret leaving her family behind but his life dictated he had to keep some secrets. There was just no other way.
As he pulled out into traffic, his mind was on other things. He drove back to the house using a different route and watched to make sure he wasn’t being followed.
Chapter Three
Calico stood by the open door of the clubhouse and watched the front gate of the compound. It was getting late and he was getting worried. Sawyer hadn’t come home yet and he couldn’t understand why.
Jolene came up behind him and wrapped her arm around his waist. “Any sign of her yet?”
Calico shook his head. “Nope.”
“Where is she then?” she muttered. “She wouldn’t worry us like this if everything was ok.”
“Do you want me to go look for her?” he asked his wife. “She is a grown woman now you know. She isn’t a little kid anymore.”
Jolene sighed and closed her eyes briefly. “I know she’s all grown up but she’s my daughter. She’s never worried me like this before and she doesn’t really know that many people here yet.”
Calico looked down into his wife’s eyes. They sparkled with unshed tears. “Honey, she’ll be fine but if you want I can go look for her.” He kissed her lips and reminded her, “She’s my daughter too, you know.”
Jolene hugged him close. “I know. She’s our daughter. This move has been hard on her. For some reason, she didn’t want to leave New York and I worry about that.”
Calico snorted. “You and I both know why she didn’t want to leave. She was hoping he would come back for her.”
Jolene sighed. “I know and that’s what hurts the most. She didn’t hear from him again. Young love is never kind to anyone.”
“What makes you think she loved that bastard?”
Jolene shook her head. “What makes you think she didn’t?”
Calico pulled her closer to his own body and held her tight. “How can a woman fall in love in three days? To a man who kidnapped her?”
“Honey, she did fall in love with him. Maybe for the first time in her life after you left, she felt safe. He made her feel safe and when you have the kind of life she did that means something. She told me he never hurt her, he even protected her. She told me he’d been watching over her for a time. I know it doesn’t make any sense to you but then you aren’t a woman. This man they call the Priest is her first love and to a woman that makes him stand out. A woman never forgets the first boy she falls in love with even if the love doesn’t last. Sawyer fell in love.”
Calico looked out into the darkness surrounding them. “You don’t think he found her again, do you?”
“I don’t know.” Jolene sighed. “I just hope she’s safe.”
“I’m gonna go look for her,” he announced again and this time he would. They walked out to the parking lot to his bike. When he threw his leg over the machine, he told her, “I’ll be back. If she comes home before I get back, call me and let me know she’s home.”
“You call me if you find something.”
Calico revved the engine on his bike and took off.
When she could no longer see his taillights, Jolene turned and went back inside the clubhouse. She met Pappy just inside the door.
“Is everything ok?”
Jolene shrugged. “Our daughter isn’t back
yet. Calico went to see if he could find her.”
Reaper, Dewey and some of the others joined them. “Should we be worried?” Reaper asked. “I mean you guys just got here, does she know anybody around here yet?”
Jolene shook her head. “I don’t think so.”
“What aren’t you telling us?” Pappy asked.
“She was taken three months ago in New York and held for three days. We got her back but the man that took her might have found her again.”
“Would he hurt her?” Reaper wanted to know.
“No I don’t think he would.”
“What are you so worried about then?”
Jolene looked over at Calico’s brother with real fear in her eyes. “I’m afraid if he took her again, that we won’t get her back. I’m afraid he’ll keep her this time and I don’t want to lose my daughter.”
Pappy frowned. “Who took her three months ago and why?”
“A man they call the Priest.” She heard everyone gasp. “She had a secret he wanted to know.”
“And he let her come back?” Dewey looked stunned. “The Priest! I’ve never heard of the man letting his prisoners return to their lives. When the Priest is done with them, the people he took were very often never heard from again.”
Reaper gave Dewey a look of warning then went over to her and wrapped his arm around her. “Don’t you worry. If anyone can find her Calico can. He’s a skilled tracker. He’ll find his baby girl and bring her back.”
Jolene laid her head on his shoulder. “Do you think so?”
“I know so.” Reaper nodded. “My brother can find anything he sets his mind to look for. He’s a stubborn sonofabitch like that.”
“God,” she whispered. “I hope so.”
They heard his pipes an hour later. Jolene, Jordan, Pappy, Dewey, Reaper and other members of the unit rushed outside. They saw him pause at the gate and rip something down then watched as he drove up to where they stood.
