by Jaci Burton
She started to speak but Sam placed a finger against her lips, silencing her.
“Don’t say anything, it doesn’t require a reply. I’ve wanted to tell you for some time now, and I know this isn’t the most romantic place to do it, but I feel it and it’s out there and that’s all you need to know.” He took her chin in his hand, raised her face up to his and planted a kiss on her lips so gentle and sweet it almost made her cry.
Then he smiled at her. God how she could get lost in that smile.
“Go do what you need to do. You’ve got a very busy day. We’ll have time later to talk. Oh I forgot,” he added with a huge grin, “Break a leg tonight, babe.”
He’d put it out there. And she would too. Then they’d talk, decide what was going to happen next. She vowed to tell him tonight what was in her heart. As she watched him walk away, she whispered, “I love you too, Sam. God help me, but I love you too.”
* * * * *
The play was a huge success. It was a perfect July evening, a slight breeze keeping everyone cool.
Having the performance outside at the local park provided enough space for everyone to attend. And, Jordan noted from the size of the crowd, surely the entire town had been present for Magnolia’s first community theater event.
They laughed, they cheered, and the cast received three curtain calls. The music was superb. The Magnolia orchestra, a ragtag team of anyone in town who could play a musical instrument, didn’t miss a note and accompanied the singers to perfection. If she didn’t know better, she could have sworn she was witnessing a Broadway event.
Okay, maybe she was a bit prejudiced since she produced and directed it. But judging from the number of people who came up to congratulate her, she wasn’t the only one who thought the play was a success.
Jordan leaned back against one of the trees at the far end of the park near the back row of chairs, watching the interaction of the cast members with the crowd.
She had to laugh at their antics. One would think Hollywood had descended on Magnolia as one by one the members of the play came out to greet their adoring public. They signed autographs, even if it was for their own friends and neighbors.
Despite her reservations, she’d done it. Had produced and directed her own play. Granted, a small-town venue, but successful nonetheless.
“I’m so proud of you, baby,” a husky voice whispered behind her. She turned and smiled as Sam took her in his arms. “You were great.”
Wrapping her arms around his waist, she laughed. “They were great. Not me. Wasn’t it wonderful?”
“You’re wonderful. You’ve made every single person in this town happy. Are you aware of that? They’ve wanted this for years, and never could get it off the ground. Until you came here and took over, and brought the people of Magnolia the culture they’ve been craving.”
“Oh please,” she said, although she could feel the blush heating her face. “It was just a little play. A bit of entertainment for the Summer Festival. Really no big deal.”
Sam shook his head and turned her around to watch the crowd milling about the cast. “You underestimate your talents. It took a lot to put on a production like this. That was a professional job. You should be proud of yourself.”
Sighing contentedly, she nodded. “I am proud. Thank you, Sam.” She pulled his arms around her and leaned against his chest.
“By the way,” he said as he watched the stage with her. “Did you know that Joshua Miller of the Lincoln Sentinel was in the audience tonight, taking pictures and making notes for an article he’s going to publish in the paper?”
“Really?” The Lincoln Sentinel, while certainly not the New York Times, was still a large newspaper by many cities’ standards. Jordan wondered why the paper would be interested in writing up a review of this small-town play, although she did remember that Joshua was raised in Magnolia.
Looking over her shoulder she eyed Sam suspiciously. “You called him didn’t you?”
His eyes widened in disbelief. “Who? Me?”
“Don’t act innocent with me. You called Joshua and asked him to come up and review my play didn’t you?”
“Maybe. But I didn’t tell him how to react, or what to write. No journalist with any integrity will write anything other than their own opinion. You know that as well as I do.”
“Well, did he say anything about it? What if he hated it? Oh how could you do this to me?”
Sam laughed at her. “Stop worrying. He told me he loved it. Said it was as professional a production as one could see outside of a major city or Broadway show. He was very impressed with your abilities, and he’s going to write that in his review.”
Jordan beamed. Okay, maybe it wasn’t Broadway. But she couldn’t care less. This was a talented group of people, they all worked very hard, and were deserving of all accolades they received. She was proud of what she had done. And enjoyed every minute of it.
“Thank you.” She turned and pressed her lips to his in a warm kiss. “I don’t want to appear ungrateful, it’s just that I hadn’t expected this.”
“Sometimes life is full of surprises, and we actually end up wanting what we least expected.”
That statement certainly had multiple implications.
“Sam, about what you said today—”
“Not now, babe,” he said, kissing her forehead. “Your adoring public awaits, and I’ve monopolized your time long enough. Go, do what you need to do, and we’ll have time to talk later.”
She couldn’t recall ever having had this much fun. After Sam left she wrapped up a few things, talked to some of the audience members who wanted to congratulate her, and was interviewed by Joshua Miller.
Sam was right. Joshua was very impressed with the production, and was sorry to hear that it was only a one-night event. He suggested she put on some encore performances, since his paper was circulated to many of the local towns, both large and small, and there was a dearth of decent plays for the communities to view. He was certain her show would generate a lot of interest and bring people in from the surrounding areas.
She hadn’t thought about that before. What would happen if she started a real community theater in this town? What would that mean to her, both professionally and personally? Did she want to stay, or did she want to go back to New York?
Before, there had been nothing to keep her in Magnolia. Now things were different.
Sam told her he loved her. Her heart still soared thinking about it. He loved her. And she loved him, although she had yet to tell him.
As she waited for Sam, Fred and Lois Tanner approached.
“Jordan, it was wonderful,” Lois exclaimed. “You must be so pleased.”
“I am, Mrs. Tanner. Thank you both so much for coming.”
Lois looked surprised. “Why wouldn’t we come? We have to support our son’s girlfriend, after all.”
Girlfriend. Sam’s girlfriend. Even his parents saw them as a couple. She couldn’t hide the smile on her face.
“What are you planning to do now? Stay in Magnolia, we hope.”
Lois voiced what Jordan had been thinking for some time, and yet hearing it made it seem real.
“I don’t know yet what I’m going to do. But I’m giving it some thought.”
Never one to pass on a matchmaking opportunity, Lois asked, “And are some of your thoughts about our son?”
Hesitating only a moment, she surprised even herself when she answered. “Yes ma’am, they are.”
Lois hugged her, and Jordan felt an outpouring of maternal love she’d never felt before. Tears stung her eyes as she thought how nice it would be to have a mother.
“Can I ask you a question?” Lois asked.
“Of course.” Jordan sensed it was going to be a serious one.
“How do you honestly feel about Sam?”
Well, that put it right out there didn’t it? But it didn’t bother her at all to answer.
“I’m in love with him, Mrs. Tanner.”
The
smile on Lois Tanner’s face lit up the night sky. “Oh, honey, I’m so happy to hear that!” She crushed Jordan to her in an even bigger hug, and then reached into her purse for a hankie to dab away the tears. “He needs someone like you in his life. You’re the best thing that’s happened to him in a very long time.”
The tears threatened again, but she kept them at bay. “Thank you, Mrs. Tanner.”
Fred placed a hand on her shoulder. “He’s a good boy, Jordan. You won’t be sorry.” Winking at her, he added, “My son’s a very lucky man.”
After they left, she tried to keep her feet planted on the ground, but it was damned hard when she felt like soaring through the air. Not only did she have a man to love, and who loved her back, but his parents liked her too.
What would happen if she stayed? The idea didn’t send her into a panic as it would have a month ago. In fact, remaining in Magnolia seemed more and more appealing each time she thought about it.
She would be giving up her career in New York, though. And her dreams. What about those? Her plans to open her own theater were so close to coming to fruition now. Could she really walk away without giving it a try?
Maybe Sam could come with her to New York.
No, impossible. He’d never do that. Why would he want to live in a big city, when he hated big cities?
Damn. She had a lot more thinking to do about all this. The last thing she wanted to do was let the excitement over the play’s success here cloud her logical thinking processes.
One step at a time.
And speaking of that first step, where was Sam? He was supposed to meet her back here about thirty minutes ago and hadn’t shown up. She was actually getting excited at the thought of staying in Magnolia and couldn’t wait to talk to him about it.
Figured, Mr. Always Prompt would pick now to be late. Rather than continuing to wait, she decided to go find him.
And when she did, the first thing she’d tell him was that she loved him. Then she’d tell him she was thinking about staying, and see how he felt about it. The geography of it all they’d figure out later.
She wandered through the maze of rides and carnival games set up at the end of Main Street. The double Ferris wheel loomed high above the steeple of the First Church of Magnolia, and screams and squeals could be heard emanating from several of the more daring rides interspersed throughout the carnival. Children with sticky cotton candy and caramel apple fingers raced through the walkways adorned with carnival hawkers beckoning players to try their luck to win a prize.
It would be fun to walk through the game booths with Sam. Maybe he’d even win a stuffed animal for her. She giggled at the thought of her and Sam walking hand and hand together, playing games and eating junk food until they were sick. Maybe they’d even ride the Tunnel of Love, a perennial favorite among the teenagers in Magnolia.
And that’s how Jordan felt right now. Like a teenager. Only this time, the man of her dreams wasn’t just a case of unrequited love. This time he was real.
Reaching the end of the row of rides and booths, she spotted Sam tucked into a corner of one of the buildings. He appeared to be talking to someone, but it was dark and she couldn’t see who it was. Although she hated to interrupt him if he was talking business, she walked closer to get his attention and let him know she was there.
The sudden shock of what she saw numbed her immediately. Her heart pounded furiously and tears began to form in her eyes. It couldn’t be. Oh God, not this.
Sam was leaning into the doorway, his back to her. Draped all over him was a petite blonde Jordan didn’t recognize, her arms wrapped around his neck. Now that she was closer, the streetlight illuminated the couple. The woman was looking up at Sam with a fierce expression of desire.
The present mixed with the past and she was ten years old again, watching her father in the arms of another woman, her mother holding her hand and yanking her along so that she couldn’t see.
But she’d seen. And she’d heard their arguments later that night when they thought she was asleep. The same argument she’d heard time and time again. Her mother’s sobbing voice begging her father not to see that woman again. Her father laughing, saying he’d do what he damned well pleased.
She couldn’t breathe through the intense pain crushing her heart. She tried to suck in air but couldn’t manage a complete breath. Her stomach ached and her legs trembled so violently she was afraid she’d fall.
Unable to move, she watched as the woman pressed closer to Sam. She could clearly see her raise up on her toes, her red-painted lips parting as she readied for a kiss.
How could she have been so stupid as to believe Sam could have genuine feelings about her? He was a man, and a man would say and do anything, including lie.
Jordan felt sick, her agony so acute that physical pain pummeled her stomach. Heaving a choked cry and gasping as she sucked in enough air to move, she whipped around and fled.
* * * * *
Sam turned at the sound of Jordan’s cry and watched her hurry away. He started to go after her, but his ex-wife held tight to him, refusing to let go.
“Dammit, Penny, I’m not going to tell you again to get your hands off me!” He peeled her hands from around his neck for the third time, finally forcefully pushing her away.
Penny affected a pert pout to her overly painted lips as she held on to Sam’s wrist when he would have walked away. “C’mon honey, you know you want me. You always wanted me before. It can be good for us again, you’ll see. Just give me another chance.”
Glancing desperately at Jordan’s retreating form, knowing what she must be thinking, Sam had neither the desire nor the inclination to continue the conversation with his ex-wife. He had, in fact, been trying to extricate himself from her clutches since she’d cornered him ten minutes ago, giving him her sob story about how much she missed him and wanted him back.
The last person he’d ever expected to see in Magnolia was Penny.
“Look,” he said impatiently as he jerked his arm away from her. “We’re divorced, which is what you wanted. You don’t want me, you’re just flat broke now and you know I have a successful business which you think you can cash in on.”
Not believing the shocked look on Penny’s face, he continued. “I feel nothing for you; you wasted your time coming back here. Now I want you to listen to me carefully because I’m not going to say this again. You repulse me. Get the hell out of my life and stay there!”
Without a single backward glance in his ex-wife’s direction, despite her crocodile tears and wails, Sam turned and ran off to catch Jordan.
Jordan furiously tried to wipe away the tears that spilled freely as she ran behind the storefronts of Main Street, not wanting anyone to see her crying. She quickened her pace even further when she heard Sam call her name. Try as she might to outrun him, he soon caught up and forced her to stop.
“Jordan, wait!” Sam turned her around to face him. “I know you saw that, and it’s not what you think. Let me explain.”
Angry with Sam and furious at herself for her stupidity in caring for him, she said, “You don’t owe me any explanation. What I saw was perfectly clear.” She tried to walk away, but he held her firm.
“That woman you saw me with was my ex-wife, Penny. She came to town today and claimed she wanted me back. I hadn’t even seen her until right before you walked up and found her arms around me.”
“Great.” She couldn’t hold back the choked, desperate laugh as she gave up fighting the tears, letting them roll down her face. “I hope you two will be very happy together.”
“I don’t want her! I want you, Jordan, and I think you know that. I love you.”
She hugged her arms to her stomach, trying to control the rising nausea. “So you said. But then you’d say anything to a woman you were sleeping with, wouldn’t you? You’re no different than my father!”
“That’s not true and you know it! I’m nothing like your father, just like you’re nothing like your mother.”
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“Right. Nothing like my father. Except in the morning you tell me you love me, and by evening your hands are all over your ex-wife.” She pushed him away as he tried to touch her.
He blew out a forceful sigh. “That’s not the way it was at all. She found me and said she had something important to discuss with me. I foolishly agreed to hear her out, and then before I knew it she was all over me, pushing herself against me and telling me how much she missed me. I never had my hands on her, except to peel hers off me.”
As much as she wanted to believe him, she couldn’t. Men like him were liars and cheats, and would never be satisfied with one woman. She should have known better. Love was a fantasy, that unattainable thing you read about in books but doesn’t exist in real life.
She should have known this would happen, would have been better off to keep her distance from Sam. Instead, she’d allowed herself to fall in love with him, and, just like her mother, the man she loved had broken her heart.
Only unlike her mother, she’d never beg. She’d never stay with a man who couldn’t keep his zipper closed whenever he was out of her sight. Without trust, they had nothing. And she didn’t trust Sam at all.
She needed escape, and she needed it now.
“Jordan! Jordan I’m so glad I found you!” Mavis Riley said breathlessly as she stopped in front of Jordan and Sam. Fortunately it was dark and the woman didn’t notice Jordan’s red-rimmed eyes or the tears still staining her cheeks. “I’ve been looking all over for you tonight. We got an offer on your house. Full asking price, and they want to buy it immediately!”
She looked at Sam, who was watching her expectantly. Turning to Mavis, she lifted her chin and nodded. “Accept the offer. Sell the house immediately. It’s time for me to get back to New York, anyway.”
Mavis thanked her and hurried off. Jordan looked at Sam, a hollow emptiness in her stomach. She felt raw, used, completely exhausted.
Sam looked pained. She wasn’t buying it for a second. He was probably thrilled she’d be leaving, figuring he’d accidentally blurted out the whole “I love you” thing and was glad she wasn’t going to hold him to it.
