by P. C. Cast
It was totally awful.
I so didn’t know what to do.
And I swear I heard Aphrodite snorting off in the distance.
“Hey.” I sat next to him and awkwardly patted his shoulder. “I know it’s terrible. You guys were really good friends.”
Erik nodded his head. I could see he was making an effort to get himself under control, so I sat there and babbled while he sniffed and wiped his face on his sleeve (eesh).
“It really sucks. Jack was too darn nice and sweet and young and everything to have something like this happen to him. We’re all gonna miss him so much.”
“Neferet did this.” He spoke quietly, and I saw him glancing around like he was scared of being overheard. “I don’t know how. I don’t fucking even know why, but she did it.”
“Yeah,” I said.
Our eyes met.
“Are you going to do something about it?” he said.
My gaze didn’t falter one little bit. “Absolutely everything in my power.”
He almost smiled. “Well, that’s good enough for me.” He wiped his face again and ran a hand through his hair. “I was leaving.”
“Huh?” I said brilliantly.
“Yeah, going. Leaving the Tulsa House of Night for L.A. They want me there—in Hollywood. I was supposed to be the next Brad Pitt.”
“Was?” I asked, totally confused. “What’s stopping you?”
Slowly, Erik raised his right hand and held it, palm out, toward me. I blinked several times, not really understanding what I was seeing.
“Yeah, it’s what you think,” he said.
“It’s Nyx’s Labyrinth.” Of course I recognized the raised sapphire-colored tattoo that filled his palm, but it was like my mind was having a hard time catching up with my eyes, and I wasn’t getting it until Aphrodite’s voice came from behind me. “Oh, for shit’s sake! Erik’s a Tracker.”
Erik’s eyes shifted from me to Aphrodite. “Happy now? Go ahead and laugh. You know this means I can’t leave the Tulsa House of Night for four years—that I have to stay here and follow a damn essence and be the asshole who is there when every kid for the next four years is Marked and finds out he might or might not die, but for sure has to change his life forever.”
There was a moment of silence and then Aphrodite said, “Is that what’s bothering you? That you’re the new Tracker and it’s a tough job, or is what’s really bothering you that you have to put off Hollywood for four years and in that time there’s sure to be ‘the next Brad Pitt’?”
I whirled around and faced her. “He was Jack’s roommate! Do you remember what it’s like to lose a roommate?” I saw her expression shift and soften, but I just shook my head. “No. You and Darius go on. I’ll follow you.” When Aphrodite still hesitated I spoke directly to her Warrior. “As your High Priestess I’m commanding you. I want to be alone with Erik. Take Aphrodite and meet me at Jack’s pyre.”
Darius didn’t hesitate for another second. He bowed solemnly to me, then he took Aphrodite by the elbow and literally pulled her away. I sighed deeply and sat down next to Erik on the bench.
“Sorry about that. Aphrodite means well, but like Stevie Rae would say, she’s not very nice sometimes.”
Erik snorted. “You don’t need to tell me that. She and I dated, remember?”
“I remember,” I said quietly. Then added, “You and I dated, too.”
“Yeah,” he said. “I thought I loved you.”
“I thought I loved you, too.”
He looked at me. “Were we wrong?”
I looked back at him. Really looked back at him. Goddess, he was hot in a seriously Superman/Clark Kent kind of way. Tall and dark and blue eyed and muscly. But there was more to him than that. Yeah, he was controlling and arrogant, but somewhere inside him I knew there was a really, really good guy. I just wasn’t the right girl for that guy.
“Yeah, we were wrong, but that’s okay. Recently I’ve been reminded that it’s okay not to be perfect, especially if you learn from your mess-ups. So how about we learn from ours? I think we could make better friends anyway.”
His gorgeous lips turned up. “I think you might be right.”
“Plus,” I added, bumping him with my shoulder, “I don’t have enough pretty straight guys as my friends.”
“I’m a pretty straight guy. I mean, a really straight guy who is also, as you say, pretty.”
“Yep, you are,” I said. Then I held out my hand. “Friends?”
“Friends.” Erik took my hand in his and then, with a rakish smile, he dropped gracefully from the bench to one knee. “My lady, let’s always be friends.”
“Okie dokie,” I said, kinda breathlessly, ’cause, well, no matter how much I loved Stark, Erik was seriously hot and a super good actor.
He bowed and kissed my hand. Not in a creepy I’m-trying-to-get-into-your-pants way, but in a real old-school-gentleman way. Still on his knee, he looked up at me and said, “You have to say something tonight that gives us hope and helps Damien, because right now lots of us are just floating out there wondering what the fuck—and Damien is seriously not doing well.”
My heart clenched. “I know.”
“Good. No matter what else, I believe in you, Zoey.”
I sighed. Again.
He smiled and stood up, pulling me up with him. “So please let me escort you to this funeral.”
I took Erik’s arm and stepped into a future I couldn’t have begun to imagine.
* * *
It was an awesome, sad, incredible sight. Unlike the last time a funeral pyre had burned for a vampyre at the House of Night, the entire school was there. Fledglings and vampyres made a huge circle around a benchlike structure that had been built in the very center of the school grounds. I could still see the charred grass that bore witness to the fact that not long ago Anastasia Lankford’s body had been consumed by the Goddess’s fire in that very same place. Only the school hadn’t come out to witness and show respect for her then. Too many of them had been under the control of Kalona—or just downright scared. Tonight was different. Kalona’s control had been broken and Jack was getting a Warrior’s sendoff.
My eyes found Dragon Lankford even before I looked at the funeral pyre. He was standing behind Jack in the shadow of the closest oak tree. But the shadows didn’t cloak his pain. I could see tears falling silently down his chiseled face. Goddess help Dragon, was my first prayer of the night. He’s such a good man. Help him find peace.
Then I looked at Jack.
What I saw made me gasp and smile through my tears. As was traditional for vampyre funerals, he’d been wrapped, head to toe, in the traditional vampyre shroud, but Jack’s covering was purple. Super shiny. Super brilliant. Super purple.
“She actually did it.” Erik’s choked voice came from beside me. “I knew purple was his favorite color, so I went to The Dolphin at Utica Square and bought purple sheets. Lots of them. Then I told Sapphire over in the infirmary to wrap Jack in them, even though I didn’t think she really would.”
I turned to Erik, went up on my tiptoes, and kissed his cheek. “Thank you. Jack would absolutely love that you did that. You were a good friend to him, Erik.”
He nodded and smiled but didn’t say anything, and I saw that he was crying again. Before I could join him and bawl so hard I couldn’t possibly be mistaken for anyone’s High Priestess, I looked away from him and my eyes found Damien. He was on his knees at the head of Jack’s pyre. Duchess was sitting beside him and his chubby cat, Cammy, was curled up mournfully between his knees. Stark was standing next to Duchess and I could see that he was petting her and murmuring to the dog and Damien at the same time. Stevie Rae was next to Stark, looking super miserable and bawling steadily. Aphrodite stood at Damien’s other side, with Darius right behind her. The Twins were to her left. And from each side of my group of best friends, the entire school stretched in a quiet, respectful circle around the pyre. Many of the fledglings and vampyres, including Lenobia and mos
t of the other professors, were holding purple candles. It didn’t seem like anyone except Stark was talking, but I could hear lots of sobbing.
Neferet was nowhere to be seen.
“You can do it,” Erik whispered.
“How?” I barely spoke the word.
“Like you always do—with Nyx’s help,” he said.
“Please, Nyx, help me. I can’t do this on my own,” I whispered aloud. And then Professor Missal was there, ushering me forward. So, moving with what I hoped were the confident strides of a grown-up real High Priestess, I walked directly to Damien.
Stark saw me first. When his eyes met mine I didn’t see any hint of jealousy or anger, even though I knew Erik was walking right behind me. My Warrior, my Guardian, my lover, stepped aside and bowed formally to me.
“Merry meet, High Priestess.” His voice rang over the school grounds. Everyone turned to me and it seemed, as one, the House of Night bowed, acknowledging me as their High Priestess.
It gave me a feeling like I’d never had before. Professors, vampyres hundreds of years old, and the youngest of fledglings were all looking to me—believing in me, trusting in me. It was as terrifying as it was awesome.
Do not ever forget this feeling, the Goddess’s voice sang through my mind. A true High Priestess is humble as well as proud, and never forgets the responsibility that being a leader entails.
I stopped before Damien and bowed to him, fist closed over my heart. “Merry meet, Damien.” Then, not caring that I was deviating from the vampyre funeral etiquette text that I’d read on the plane, I took Damien’s hands and tugged, so that he stood up. I wrapped my arms around him and repeated, “Merry meet, Damien.”
He sobbed once. His body felt stiff and he moved slowly, like he was afraid he might break into a zillion pieces, but he hugged me back really hard. Before I stepped away from him I closed my eyes, centered myself, and whispered, “Air, come to your Damien. Fill him with lightness and hope, and help him get through this night.” Air responded instantly. It lifted my hair and wrapped around Damien and me. I heard him suck in a breath, and when he exhaled, some of the terrible tightness went out of his body. I stepped back and met his sad eyes. “I love you, Damien.”
“I love you, too, Zoey. Go ahead.” He nodded toward Jack’s purple-shrouded body. “Do what you have to do. I know Jack’s not really there anyway.” He paused and choked back a sob and then added, “He’d be glad it’s you, though.”
Instead of bursting into tears and falling to the ground in a soggy puddle like I wanted to, I turned to face the pyre and the House of Night. I drew two deep breaths, let them out, and with the third I whispered, “Spirit, come to me. Make my voice loud enough for everyone to hear.” The element with which I have the closest affinity filled me and strengthened me. When I began speaking my voice was like a beacon from the Goddess, and it echoed with sound and spirit over the school grounds.
“Jack isn’t here. In our minds we all understand that. Damien just said it to me, but tonight I want you all to know it.” I could feel everyone’s eyes on me, and I spoke slowly and distinctly the words that were Goddess-touched as they came to my mind. “I’ve been to the Otherworld and I can promise you that it is as beautiful and amazing and real as your hearts want to believe. Jack is there. He doesn’t feel any pain. He’s not sad or worried or scared. He’s with Nyx in her meadows and groves.” I paused and smiled through the brightness of tears. “He’s probably frolicking gaily in those meadows and groves.” I heard Damien’s surprised giggle echoed by a few of the fledglings. “He’s meeting familiar friends, like my Heath, and probably decorating like crazy.” Aphrodite snorted a laugh and Erik chuckled. “We can’t be with him right now.” I looked at Damien. “It’s hard. I know it’s hard. But we can be sure that we’ll see him again—in this life or the next. And when we do, no matter who we are or where we are, I promise you that one thing about our spirit, our essence, will stay the same: love. Our love lives on and will last forever. And that’s a promise that I know comes straight from the Goddess.”
Stark handed me a long wooden staff that had something sticky wrapped around the other end of it. I took it, but before I walked to the pyre my eyes found Shaunee.
“Will you help me?” I asked her.
She wiped away her tears, faced south, lifted her arms, and in a voice magnified by love and loss, she called, “Fire! Come to me!” The hands she held up over her head glowed as, with me, Shaunee walked to the head of the giant pile of timber on which Jack’s body lay.
“Jack Swift, you were a sweet, special boy. I’ll always love you like a brother and a friend. Until next time I see you, merry meet, merry part, and merry meet again.” When I touched the end of my torch to the pyre, Shaunee flung her element into it, instantly setting it to light with an otherworldly glow that shimmered yellow and purple.
I’d turned to Shaunee and was opening my mouth to thank her and her element when Neferet’s voice pierced the night.
“Zoey Redbird! Fledgling High Priestess! I ask that you stand witness!”
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Zoey
I didn’t have to look hard to find her. Neferet was standing on the steps of Nyx’s Temple, off to my left. As everyone turned to whisper and stare at her, I felt Stark move to my side, so that it would only take one quick motion for him to come between Neferet and me. I was also aware of Stevie Rae. Suddenly she was there on my other side, and from the corners of my vision I could see the Twins and even Damien. My circle of friends surrounded me, letting me know wordlessly that they had my back.
When Neferet began to walk toward me I automatically began centering myself. I thought, She must have gone totally, utterly insane to ask me to perform the funeral and then attack me in front of the entire school. But sane or insane, it really didn’t matter. She was evil and dangerous and coming against me, and I Was Not Going To Run.
So her next words shocked me almost as much as what she began to do.
“Hear me, Zoey Redbird, Fledgling High Priestess, and bear witness. I have wronged Nyx and you and this House of Night.”
Her voice was strong and clear and beautiful, and it seemed to make music in the air around her. In the tempo she was creating, Neferet began to take her clothes off.
It should have been embarrassing or uncomfortable or erotic, but it wasn’t any of those things. It was simply beautiful.
“I have lied to you and to my Goddess.” Her shirt came off, fluttering behind her like a petal falling from a rose. “I have deceived you and my Goddess about my intentions.” She unwrapped the black silk skirt she was wearing and stepped out of it as if it were a pool of dark water. Completely naked, she walked directly up to me. The purple and yellow flames of Jack’s pyre flickered against her flesh, making her look like she, too, burned, only without being consumed. When she reached me she dropped to her knees, threw back her head, and opened her arms, saying, “Worst of all, I allowed a man to seduce me away from the love of my Goddess and her Path. Now here, bared to you, our House of Night, and to Nyx, I ask to be forgiven for my wrongdoings, for I find that I cannot live this terrible lie another moment.” As she finished speaking she lowered her head and her arms and then formally, respectfully, deeply, Neferet bowed to me.
In the complete silence that followed her pronouncement my mind whirred in a cacophony of conflicting thoughts: She’s pretending—I wish she wasn’t—it’s because of her that Heath and Jack are dead—She’s a master manipulator. Trying to figure out what I should say—what I should do—I looked around, helplessly, for some clue. The Twins and Damien were staring openmouthed at Neferet, totally shocked. I glanced at Aphrodite. She was staring at Neferet, too, but the look on her face was open disgust. Stevie Rae and Stark were both looking at me. Ever so slightly, without saying a word, Stark shook his head once, no. I looked from him to Stevie Rae, who mouthed two words to me: she lies.
Hardly breathing, I glanced around the circle made by the House of Night. Some w
ere looking at me questioningly, expectantly, but most of them were gawking at Neferet in awe, openly sobbing with what was obviously a mixture of happiness and relief.
At that moment, one thought crystallized and sliced daggerlike through all of the others in my mind: If I don’t accept her apology the school will turn against me. I’ll look like a vindictive brat, and that is exactly what Neferet wants.
I had no choice. All I could do was react and hope my friends trusted me enough to know that I could tell the difference between truth and manipulation.
“Stark, give me your shirt,” I said quickly.
He didn’t hesitate. He unbuttoned it and handed it to me.
Being sure my voice still carried the power of spirit with it I said to her, “Neferet, for myself I forgive you. I never wanted to be your enemy.” She looked up at me; her green eyes were absolutely guileless.
“Zoey, I—,” she began.
I spoke over her, cutting off the sweet sound of her voice. “But I can only speak for myself. You’ll have to seek the Goddess for her forgiveness. Nyx knows your heart and your soul, so it’s there that you’ll find her answer.”
“Then I already have it, and it fills my heart and soul with joy. Thank you, Zoey Redbird, and thank you, House of Night!”
There were murmurs all around the circle of “Thank the Goddess!” and “Blessed be!” I made myself smile as I bent and wrapped Stark’s shirt around her shoulders. “Please, get up. You shouldn’t be on your knees in front of me.”
Neferet stood gracefully, and put on Stark’s shirt, buttoning it carefully. Then she turned to Damien. “Merry meet, Damien. May I have your permission to send my personal prayer for Jack’s spirit up to the Goddess?”
Damien didn’t speak. He just nodded, and I couldn’t tell through the sadness and grief on his face whether he believed Neferet’s show or not. She continued to act her part perfectly.
“Thank you.” Neferet stepped closer to Jack’s fiery pyre, put her head back, and lifted her arms. Unlike me, she didn’t amplify her voice. Instead she spoke so softly that none of us could hear her. Her face was tilted just right so that I had a perfect view of it. Her expression was serene and sincere, and I wondered how it was possible that something I was sure was so rotten inside could have such a gorgeous outside.
