“Bar fight,” Scotty said. “It was my fault. I started it.”
“A bar fight…”
“Look,” I said. “Some asshole sucker punched me right in the nose. That’s why I look bloody. But I’m fine.”
“He threw a ball at a guy’s head,” Scotty said.
“A ball?” Julia asked.
“Pool ball. We were at Anthony’s.”
“Are you drunk?” Julia asked me. Before I could answer, she walked right up to Scotty and put a finger to his nose. “Are you drunk?”
“No,” Scotty said. “I swear.”
“We’re not drunk,” I said.
“So you were at Anthony’s… not drinking?”
“Dude, you’re busted,” Scotty said.
“Busted, huh?” Julia asked me.
“Not busted,” I said. “Shut up, Scotty. Shit. Sweetheart, we went to blow off some steam. It’s been a long week. That’s all.”
“You went looking for a fight,” Julia said. “Are you serious?”
“I went looking for the fight,” Scotty said.
“Scotty, go home,” Julia said. “Please, just go the hell home.”
Scotty looked at me and showed his hands. “Sorry, brother. Should have just fought for money. Could have gotten another necklace or bracelet to smooth it over.”
As Scotty laughed back to his truck, I gritted my teeth.
I was going to have no choice but to kill Scotty.
Julia tilted her head. “What did he mean by that?”
“Nothing.”
“Jett… what the hell was he talking about?”
“Sweetheart, what are you doing here?” I asked. “I mean, not that it’s a bad thing.”
“I got out early and decided to surprise you. I guess I’m the one getting the surprise.” Julia fumbled in her bag. She lifted the necklace I got her out of the bag. “How did you get this for me?”
“I bought it.”
“How did you get the money for it?”
I shook my head. “Don’t do this, Julia. I worked to get you something.”
“You asshole,” she said. “You fucking fought people to buy this for me?”
“No,” I said. “I fought people to keep the lights on in my place. Because my other money was used to buy that for you.”
“Same thing!” Julia yelled.
She slammed the necklace to my chest and turned to rush inside my place.
I went after her and she closed the door on my face.
It pissed me off, such a stupid move, making me take that extra second in life to open a door that was just open.
“Why does it matter?” I asked her.
“Because I hate that fighting stuff,” she said. “And you knew that. You said you weren’t going to do that anymore. You lied to me.”
“I didn’t lie,” I said. “I never once said I was going to give it up.”
“But you stopped.”
“Because I didn’t have to do it.”
I put the necklace on the counter.
Julia shook her head. “And if something happened to you during a fight… because of a necklace?”
“Nothing happened,” I said. “Stop thinking that way. Why can’t you just be in the present?”
“Oh, I’m in the present, Jett,” she said. “I’m looking at the present. You have blood on your face and your shirt. Do you think you look cool? Do you think you’re all tough now?”
“What about you?” I asked. “Do you feel cool and tough right now? Acting like this? Treating me like this? I went out with Scotty. He’s having a bad week, like me. I was worried he was going to go over the edge. So we went to Anthony’s.”
“And you just picked out some random people and said let’s fucking fight them, Scotty man…”
I smiled. “Scotty man?”
Julia grabbed a spoon off the counter and threw it at me.
She swiped her hand across the counter to get the necklace.
“I hate you,” she said.
She took off again, darting toward the back of the house and out the back door.
“Dammit, Scotty,” I growled as I went after Julia again.
There was this thing about Scotty… where he didn’t think. He didn’t use his damn brain. And, yeah, I was well aware it was all my fault. But still… dammit, Scotty.
Julia was on the move, racing down the beach.
I had to sprint after her to even stand a chance to catch up to her.
“Julia, will you wait a damn second?” I called out.
She stopped and turned, her hair whipping around her face. She pushed her hair out of the way.
She was really that pissed off at me.
“What can you possibly have to say right now?” she asked.
“I don’t know,” I said. “I just wanted you to stop and breathe for a second. This is crazy.”
“Crazy? Yeah, this is crazy.”
I closed in on her. “Sweetheart, look at me. Can you just see it through my eyes for a second.”
“And what does that mean?”
“I know so much about you,” I said. “But there are things I don’t know. I never intended to meet you and fall in love the way I did. But it happened. And it’s by far the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me in my life. You saw something you wanted. I saw the look in your eyes. And I was going to find a way to get that for you.”
“You’re literally blaming me for this, Jett.”
“No,” I said. “I’m not. I wanted to get this for you. I wanted to make it something… I don’t know, Julia. I thought we could talk about this ten years from now and laugh. That I was so crazy in love with you I fought for money to buy you a necklace. My way of proving my love…”
“Proving?” Julia asked. “Proving would have been to be honest. I told you how much I hated that stuff. How scary it is. How dangerous it is. One punch, Jett. One damn punch and you…” She swallowed hard. “You could get hurt for good. Or killed. And at the same time, you hit someone one time you could hurt them, or kill them.”
“Is this how you’re going to live your life?” I asked.
“What?”
“You live in this world of… something happens and you have to relive it in your mind ten different ways. But it already happened, sweetheart. It’s done. You can’t go back.”
“But you can think about it for a second, Jett. Maybe make sure it doesn’t happen again.”
“I know you hate the fighting thing,” I said. “I get that. I told you before it’s a reminder of where I’ve been in life. Where I am now. Where I want to go. Next time I buy you something, sweetheart, it won’t be like this.”
“I don’t want anything else from you, Jett,” she said.
“Oh?”
“I thought we were better than this.”
“Than what?”
“This,” she yelled, holding her hand out with the necklace in it. “This. I’ll always look at this and see you lying to me. Seeing you putting your life at risk for something so stupid.”
“So now the necklace is stupid?”
“It’s a necklace,” Julia said. “It’s not worth your life. It’s not worth any happiness either. Happiness would have been you with me instead of secretly fighting. And how stupid am I? I touched your face and knew you had fought. And I told myself it was okay. I thought about everything. Like you said, a reminder, right? It’s all just a reminder. But you dragged me into the middle of it. And I say fuck that. I want no part of it.”
I nodded. “Right. You want no part of it. You can’t handle everything about me then, sweetheart. But I’ve taken on everything about you. The way you’re acting right now…”
Julia let out a loud - and fake - laugh. “So it all comes back to being my fault. Real nice, Jett. Throw that guilt around like it’s free to give.”
“You don’t want to talk about tonight,” I said. “The truth of what happened with Scotty.”
“I don’t give a damn about that. Or Scotty
. And you’re seriously going to do what he says? He can’t count to five using his own fingers. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a great guy and all, but-”
“He has nothing to do with this,” I said. “You know what? I wanted to fight. I wanted to go and fight someone. And make money at it. I wanted to give you something because of that. So we could have a story. And tonight? I was in a damn mood and it felt good to do that. You want to act like this, sweetheart? Then enjoy.”
“Yeah, fuck you too, Jett,” Julia said.
She threw the necklace to the sand.
Then she stepped on it.
I laughed.
Wrong move.
Julia walked by me.
“Wait a second,” I called out.
I grabbed the necklace off the sand and looked back at Julia.
Then without hesitation I threw the necklace as hard as I could into the ocean.
“Problem solved,” I said.
“Hope it was worth it, Jett. I’m leaving.”
“Go home and run all your scenarios through your head, sweetheart. I’ll be right here living in the present.”
Julia wiped her eyes. “Yeah. The present.”
She walked away.
And I didn’t go after her.
I stood there alone in the present.
Which was a terrible reality.
I just lost Julia.
Chapter 18
THEN
Julia
Another night and I sat up in bed, hugging a pillow like I was thirteen and just found out my boyfriend kissed another girl at the Friday night football game under the bleachers while I was getting water and popcorn.
My heart felt ripped into pieces.
It was one of the only times that I could hear Aunt Bea’s voice telling me I was too young and it felt that way.
I finally threw the pillow off the bed.
Jett was wrong.
That was it.
If he wanted to go do that stuff, then he could find someone else to deal with it.
It didn’t matter that I met him at a fight.
He knew I didn’t want to be there.
And even then… he swooned me without telling me he was there to fight.
Stupid jerk…
‘You know, smoking is a bad habit, sweetheart.’
I turn my head and have every possible insult locked in my head. But I’m speechless. He’s tall. He’s beautiful. His jaw is so square. And his eyes are dark and scary yet inviting… I forget how to breathe. I forget my own name. I…
I blink a few times to regain my composure.
He’s in jeans and a black t-shirt, leaving way too much for the eyes to look at and plenty more for the imagination.
I remind myself I’m here with my boyfriend.
But I sort of forget his name too.
Kyle. Ken. Kenny. K… Kinney.
That’s right! That’s it!
I’m here with Kinney.
My boyfriend.
‘Can I sit down?’ he asks me.
I nod.
I still haven’t spoken to him.
I’m giving myself away here that he’s the hottest guy I’ve ever seen and my body and heart are suddenly more confused than the first time I got my period in the middle of English class.
He sits down on the rock that’s big enough to hold six of us, yet he sits so close to me, our elbows touch.
I’m dying.
I’m literally going to die.
I look at my cigarette and hurry to take a drag.
‘I guess you don’t care then,’ he says.
I blow the smoke and look at him again.
I really need him to look ugly now. I need him to have like a three pound wart sticking off his cheek.
But he’s so…
‘Mind if I have a drag?’ he asks and takes the cigarette from my hand.
‘You just said that’s a bad habit,’ I whisper.
He smirks at me.
Okay… I’m either officially dead or I’m going to run away with this guy and marry him tonight.
‘It’s a terrible habit,’ he says. ‘But it’s so fucking good.’
‘I’ve been trying to quit,’ I say.
‘Oh yeah? Why?’
‘My boyfriend doesn’t like it,’ I blurt out.
I gasp.
My face turns red.
Like I’m ashamed that I have a boyfriend.
Which I kind of am though.
I mean, look at this… Kinney drags me to a fight. An actual fight. Where two guys are going to hit each other. That’s his idea of fun. Because he wants to look cool in front of all the other baseball players. It’s so fucking dumb. He’s so fucking dumb. I’m going to dump him soon. Maybe right now. I can ask this hot guy to sit for a minute while I go tell Kinney everything I hate about him and break up with him.
Then I can rush back here and kiss this hot guy in a way that I’ve only seen in the movies.
Yeah, ‘those kinds of movies’ …
‘Boyfriends are the worst,’ he says.
I laugh. ‘Oh yeah?’
He hands the cigarette back to me. ‘It’s not my business to say anything, sweetheart, but nobody should tell you what to do. You’re not stupid. I can tell. You know smoking is bad for you. But sometimes you need a little bad to balance out the good.’
I’m beyond melting as this point.
I’m goo.
Like gum on a sidewalk when it’s one hundred degrees outside.
My bottom lip is tingling, fantasizing about this guy kissing me and biting my lip.
My toes curl.
Who am I right now?
‘Who says I’m good?’ I ask.
‘I can tell. You don’t want to be here, do you? Watch a bunch of fucking idiots throw punches at each other for money. Sounds so stupid.’
‘Right?’ I cry out.
I’m in love.
Boom.
I smoke my cigarette and smile.
I don’t have to hide so much suddenly.
I mean I will still have to spray myself and eat a pound of mints before finding Kinney again. He knows I smoke. He knows I hide it. He tells me to hide it because it’s gross.
‘Where’s this boyfriend at?’ he asks me.
‘Why?’
‘Is he fighting?’
‘Kinney?’ I ask and laugh. ‘No.’
‘Not a fighter, huh?’
‘This is really dumb… you even said it.’
‘It’s the worst,’ he says with a grin. He leans toward me and bumps his shoulder to mine. ‘Enjoy your cigarette, sweetheart. And then smoke another. Maybe pick a fight too.’
‘Yeah? Want me to fight you?’
Ohmygod, I’m flirting. I have a boyfriend and I’m flirting with another guy. I’m seriously the worst human in the world right now.
And I don’t feel guilty about it.
So that makes it worse.
Ohmygod…
‘Fight you?’ he asks. ‘I think you can take me in a second. Just looking at those eyes of yours… you’ve already won.’
My chin quivers.
I want to kiss this guy and then cry and thank him for making me feel pretty.
He touches my hand and curls his fingers around it, making my hand into a fist.
I make a noise in my throat and I hope to everything he didn’t hear it.
I’m so pathetic right now. In so many ways.
He moves his hand from mine and lifts my fist to his cheek.
He pulls it back an inch and then hits his cheek with my fist.
He puts his head back.
His Adam’s apple is so…
I whimper under my breath.
‘You win,’ he whispers. ‘Knock-out punch.’
He looks at me and winks.
Then he stands up.
‘Where are you going?’ I ask.
‘Miss me already?’ he asks.
‘What if I do?’ I ask.
He puts his hand out.
/>
I instantly touch it.
Kinney is somewhere nearby.
What the fuck am I doing?
‘You’ll see me soon enough, sweetheart,’ he says.
‘Oh?’
‘Get close to the front,’ he says. ‘I’m going to end this one quick so I can come back here and talk to you some more.’
‘Wait… you’re fighting?’
He laughs. ‘Yeah.’
‘You said…’
‘I know what I said. I meant it. But I’m still fighting. Hope you’ll cheer me on. I’ll be looking for you the entire time. And if I take my eyes off the fight I could get hurt. You wouldn’t want that, would you?’
My jaw drops.
I don’t know what to say.
He laughs again. ‘I’m Jett. In case you feel like screaming my name tonight. I’m sure that’ll help me too.’
He pulls his hand away and walks away.
I can’t stop staring.
He pushes through the crowd to go into the spot where the fights happen.
Then about two minutes too late I find my voice again.
‘Jett… my name is Julia… and I think I just fell in love with you.’
* * *
I had crazy dreams all night.
Jett sitting with me on that rock. Smoking. Flirting. And then he jumped off the rock and disappeared into the night.
Then in the next dream I was walking down some street. With normal looking houses. Like a calm and quiet neighborhood. I had no idea where I was.
And then Jett poked his head out of a second story window and called my name.
I woke up before I could speak back to him.
The urge to look up the meaning of the dreams bothered me all morning.
I worked at the bakery in a daze.
Like a low and thick fog surrounded my head and that was that.
Even with the bakery buzzing with customers, my mind couldn’t stop thinking about Jett.
Everything I had put into place for Aunt Bea’s place was exploding.
In a good way though.
By ten we were selling out of baked goods.
It felt like every two minutes I had to make more coffee.
People were asking about the coffees and the flavors. And they were asking about the baked goods.
I couldn’t remember the last time I saw Aunt Bea so comfortable and happy as she worked. Talking to everyone. Laughing. Telling stories.
HIDDEN CREEK THEN: a hidden creek high novel Page 15
