“Hey, Reyes,” Melody Ann called out, walking toward him with the camera. “Carmina says you cuss too much on social media.”
“Yeah?” Dominique Reyes called back. “Fuck Carmina.”
“What did you just say?” Carmina heard Danny say, and her head whipped around to see him belligerently confronting Dominique Reyes. Danny was standing in front of Tom, who was sitting on a bench in the back of the room staring at her accusingly. She looked away, guilt eating her up inside.
“I said fuck Carmina,” Reyes replied, speaking slowly. “You got a hearing problem?” The whole room erupted as Danny launched himself at Reyes and the two slammed into the lockers behind him.
Melody Ann gasped and shut off the camera, shoving Carmina toward the door. “Shit,” she hissed. “I did not mean to start that.”
“What the fuck?” Carmina heard Cass Zielinski bellow across the room. She looked over her shoulder and saw guys peeling Danny off Reyes, who was cursing a blue streak and calling Danny every name in the book.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Tom snapped at Danny, tossing him back against a locker. Half the people in the room stared in shock. Tom just didn’t speak like that.
“You heard him,” Danny said, rubbing his jaw, where Reyes must have gotten in a punch. “He disrespected her.”
“He disrespected her?” Tom asked angrily. “And you didn’t yesterday?” Carmina closed her eyes in horror.
“What happened yesterday?” Melody Ann whispered to her. Carmina shook her head and backed toward the door.
“No, I didn’t,” Danny said angrily. “Get your shit together.”
“You’ve got no right to defend her,” Tom said, shoving Danny back into the lockers.
“Motherfucker’s got anger issues,” Reyes yelled out from behind the players holding him back.
“You didn’t defend her,” Danny said accusingly, ignoring Reyes. “Were you just going to sit there and let him say that shit? He disrespects the woman you’re sleeping with and you don’t call him out?”
Carmina felt every eye in the room turn to look at her. She was staring at Tom and Danny in horror. Not only had she screwed up her life, she’d screwed up theirs. They’d been best friends until she came along. She turned and ran out of the locker room.
Carmina grabbed her purse from her desk as soon as she got back to the office. Buster immediately got up and came to stand by her side. She grabbed his leash and was heading for the door when Melody Ann stepped inside and closed it behind her.
“Hold it right there, buster,” she said. Then she looked down at Buster. “You, too,” she told the dog. She looked back up at Carmina. “Was there something you forgot to tell me?” Carmina shook her head.
“Okay,” Melody Ann said, nodding. “I get that. Your personal life is none of my business. But it seems to have had a teeny, tiny impact at work today. So maybe we should talk about it. If you want.” She looked at her watch. “Because we have maybe fifteen minutes before Sam arrives. Maybe ten, depending on how fast someone can get out there and tell him what just happened.”
“Am I fired?” Carmina asked tiredly.
“Fired? Are you kidding? No,” Melody Ann said. “You didn’t do anything. If those jerks can’t keep it together, that’s not your fault. Sit.” She pointed to Carmina’s desk chair. “Pet Buster. And tell me what’s going on. Quick.” She checked her watch. “Eight minutes if my estimate’s correct.”
“I have sex issues,” Carmina admitted, blushing. “Tom is trying to help. We are sleeping together, but we’re not together.”
“Sex issues?” Melody Ann asked, pulling up a chair. “Treat me like a doctor. I’m kind of freaky in bed. Maybe I can help you.”
“I’m not into girls,” Carmina said. “Sorry.”
Melody Ann laughed. “Me, neither,” she said. “I just meant advice.”
“Oh. Okay.” Carmina took a deep breath. “I can’t come. Couldn’t come. Not with Tom, either.”
“Wow,” Melody Ann said. “I think everybody comes with Tom. That’s hardcore. And Danny? How does he fit into all this? How did he disrespect you?”
“He didn’t. We had sex. It was…” Carmina searched for the word. “Unexpected? Not planned?”
“Spur of the moment,” Melody Ann said. “Got it. And Tom found out?” Carmina nodded. “So Tom clearly thinks you’re together, but you don’t.”
“What?” Carmina asked, shocked. “No.”
“Yes,” Melody Ann said firmly. “That was jealousy, plain and simple.”
“I came with Danny.” Carmina bit her lip after blurting out the confession.
“Whoa,” Melody Ann said, leaning back in her chair. “And Tom knows. Shit.”
“Yeah,” Carmina agreed.
“First, respect for nailing two of the hottest guys on the team,” Melody Ann said. “From one woman to another, not as your boss.”
“Gee, thanks,” Carmina said sarcastically.
“Don’t knock it. There are girls out there dreaming about it.” Melody Ann took a deep breath. “So, do you want to be with Danny? Since he apparently has a magic dick?” Carmina laughed and then covered her face with her hand.
“It wasn’t that,” she said. “It was…he treated me like a woman. Not someone with brain damage, or someone who might break. You know? He wanted me. Me. It wasn’t about helping me, or pitying me, or therapy, or any of that. It was a fuck. You know?”
“Oh, I know,” Melody Ann agreed with a knowing smile. “Caveman, me want stuff, huh? And that did it for you?” Carmina shook her head. She wasn’t getting it.
“No. Not how he did it. Why. See?”
“But Tom clearly likes you,” Melody Ann said. “I don’t think it’s just about helping you or therapy or whatever for him, either. And Danny seems pretty confused, too. What are you going to do?”
“Hide,” Carmina said, nodding. “Yep. Hide.”
“Carmina!” she heard Sam bellow down the hallway. She hunched her shoulders and closed her eyes, wishing she could start hiding right then.
Chapter 16
“You son of a bitch,” Sam said, pushing the apartment door open and shoving Tom back against the wall in the same motion.
“I really, really like her,” Tom said earnestly. “I mean it, Sam. And if you’d just talk to her you’ll understand what’s going on.”
“I know what’s going on,” Sam said. King and Jane walked in behind him, and Jane closed the door while King pulled Sam off Tom.
“Okay,” King said. “We agreed there’d be none of that.” He started walking into the living room and he took Sam with him without much effort. Even though Sam was a damn big linebacker, King was the biggest guy Tom had ever met. Like three Dwayne Johnsons in one.
“Where the hell is Smith?” Sam snarled. “He’s the one who’s going to get a punch in the face.”
Tom sat down dejectedly, sighing. “I know how you feel. But the truth is, that’s not being fair to him or to Carmina.”
“What the hell were you thinking, announcing it like that to the whole locker room?” Sam demanded, gesticulating wildly in the middle of the room. King sat down on the couch next to Jane, watching him.
“I was upset,” Tom said, laying his head on the back of the chair. “You know, because she got off with him and not me.”
“Don’t say that shit to me!” Sam yelled. “She’s like my sister. Do you want some guy talking about your sister that way?”
“I don’t have one,” Tom told him, lifting his head up. “But, yeah, I see your point. Sorry. Let me rephrase. I’m upset because Danny worked for her and I didn’t.”
“What is this, grade school?” Sam asked incredulously. “Grow up! She just got a job there. Now all the guys are going to see her and they’re going to know she’s sleeping with both of you.”
“So?” Tom asked. “Jane’s sleeping with both of you and we all know it.”
“Yeah,” Jane said wryly. “What’s wrong with that?”
“That’s different,” Sam said.
“Why? Because it’s you and Jane and King, and not me, Carmina, and Danny?”
“Holy shit, are all three of you sleeping together?”
“That’s none of your damn business,” Danny said from where he stood on the other side of the room, his arms crossed and feet spread like he was bracing for a blow. He’d just come out of his bedroom. “But for your information, no.” Sam made a move toward Danny and King rose from the couch to intercept him. Sam stopped on his own.
“He’s right,” Jane said, standing up. “It isn’t any of our business. And for the record, I was against this visit.” She threw her hands up in the air. “Carmina is an adult and she deserves some privacy.”
“Carmina can’t handle this right now,” Sam said. “She just got a job, which you two dumb fucks have probably ruined for her. Do you know how hard it is for her to get a job with her condition? Do you? She’s trying to get her life under control.”
“No, she’s trying to get it back to normal,” Tom said, standing up and angrily confronting Sam. “Which is different. Stop handling her with kid gloves and trying to run her life for her.”
“Why do you think she moved down here?” Sam asked. “She needs me to run interference for her, that’s why. She’s not ready.”
“She moved down here to get away from her family, who were suffocating her,” Tom told him. “Don’t make the same mistake.”
“What?” Sam asked, confusion on his face.
“She told me that she came down here because she needed someone who understood what she’d been through and who could help her be normal again. That was supposed to be you.” Tom pointed at Sam. “But you’re doing the same shit her family was doing, being overprotective and trying to make her decisions for her. That’s not what she needs, Sam. She needs you to support her, not take over her life.”
“How dare you tell me what Carmina needs,” Sam said, anger making his voice shake. “You weren’t there. You don’t know shit.”
“Have you tried talking to Carmina?” Tom asked. “Have you asked her what she wants?”
“She wants you, dammit,” Sam said. “She said some shit about wanting to be treated like a woman and she has needs and…I don’t know. Fuck. I panicked.”
“I’m sorry,” Danny said. He sat down at the table, still on the other side of the room. Tom felt that distance like a punch to the gut. Danny looked defeated and bitter, like the Danny they’d all met months ago. “I didn’t think about any of that. I just saw her and…and she was into it, and my brain short-circuited. Fuck.” He looked away. “I swear I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. I stayed away from her. I did. For a long time, even though there was something there. Right? But she and I made that choice. It’s not Tom’s fault, and it’s still not your business.” He glared at Sam. “I’m not going to talk about it with you anymore. This is a conversation we need to have with Carmina. Not you.”
“He’s right, Sam,” Jane said firmly. “Which is exactly what I told you.”
There was a knock on the door and they all turned to stare at it like the Grim Reaper was behind it. It was King who finally went over and opened the door. Carmina walked in and looked around at all the guilty faces. She focused on Sam.
“I told you no,” she said, frowning. “Leave.”
“You also said you’d been avoiding Tom’s calls because you didn’t want to deal with them,” Sam snapped. “So I’m trying to deal with them for you.” Tom’s heart sank.
“Out,” Carmina said. She turned and opened the door. “Leave.”
“Car,” Sam said, clearly trying to placate her. She just as clearly wanted none of it. She held up her hand.
“Stop.” She pointed out the door. “Go. King?”
King got a firm grip on Sam’s arm and ushered him out, Sam blustering all the way. Jane stopped to kiss Carmina on the cheek. “Call me,” she said. Then she closed the door, leaving Carmina, Tom, and Danny staring at one another.
“Can we talk?” Carmina asked. She smiled bitterly. “Or try to.” She walked over and sat down on the couch, facing Tom in the big lounge chair. She pointed to the other end of the couch. “Danny. Please.” Danny looked like he was going to refuse, until she said please.
—
Danny slowly walked over and sat down, keeping his distance. Carmina took a deep breath and tried to concentrate, despite her nerves. “We need to talk.”
“No kidding,” Tom said. She looked over and he was staring out the window, avoiding her gaze. He ran his hand over his face. “I’ll start.” That surprised her. She nodded, then realized he wasn’t looking at her.
“Okay,” she said. He turned back to her and she was upset by the sadness she saw in his face.
“I’ll bow out,” he said. “I know Danny’s better for you, after what happened yesterday morning. But I am sorry I wasn’t the one to unlock it. I wanted to be. You know that, right? It bothers me, that it was him and not me. I mean, I know we said neither of us wanted to go there right now, but I flat out lied. I did.”
“Tom,” she said, gripped by a longing so intense it stole her breath. “I lied, too,” she whispered. “I wanted it.” She reached for his hand and he took it, rubbing his thumb over the back of her hand.
“Well, that makes me feel marginally better,” he said, but she knew he was lying again.
“Hold up,” Danny said, standing. He paced over to the windows and faced them. “I’m not in the running here. What happened yesterday morning…that was a one-time deal. I thought I made that clear.” That would have mortally embarrassed Carmina if Tom hadn’t been holding her hand. He gave her courage.
“I know,” she said. She’d decided on the way to their apartment that she would be honest with Danny. She owed him that much. “I took advantage of you. I’m sorry.”
“I…what?” Danny said, sounding confused. “Isn’t that my line?”
“No.” She shook her head. “I’ve wanted you for a long time, and when you came in, when you looked at me like that, I took advantage. I didn’t tell you the whole story.” She took a deep breath. “I used you.”
“Carmina,” Tom said quietly. “Don’t.”
“He deserves the truth, doesn’t he?” she asked him. “He is still your friend.”
“He’s still my best friend, if he wants to be,” Tom said, glancing over at Danny. “I only fight with my best friends.”
“You need a new rule book,” Danny told him flatly. “Best friends got each other’s backs.”
“Hey, I pulled you off Reyes. That has to count for something.”
“You should have helped me kick his ass,” Danny grumbled. He dropped into a chair by the window. “What is this truth you two keep talking about?”
Tom squeezed her hand reassuringly. “He is my best friend,” he told her. “He’ll understand just like I did.”
“Since the war, since this…” she said, and pointed at her head. “I can’t. You know. Come.” She wrinkled her nose in mortification.
“Go where?” Danny asked in confusion.
“Not go. Come.” He still didn’t get it. “Sex,” she added. She looked at Tom.
“Orgasm,” Tom told Danny. “Until yesterday morning with you she hadn’t come since…” He looked at her questioningly.
“Three years,” she admitted.
“Shit,” Danny breathed out. “Seriously?” She nodded. “Why me?” he asked, a hand on his chest, incredulity in his voice. “It was quick, hard. Jesus. Now that I think on it, it wasn’t very good. I mean, it was a quickie.” It was his turn to wince. “I’m really sorry now.”
“You don’t get it,” Tom said. “She didn’t come with me.”
Danny stood up and paced again. “How can that be? Everyone comes with you.”
“That’s what Melody Ann said,” Carmina told him, nodding.
Tom looked irritated. “Look, I may have gotten around a little in the past few months—” Danny sn
orted at the understatement. “But,” Tom continued, “I’m not in triple digits yet. Less than a year ago I’d only slept with one person in my life.”
“Really?” Carmina asked in surprise. “You’re really good.”
“Thanks,” Tom said. “But not good enough, apparently.”
“I didn’t bring my best that morning,” Danny said defensively. “It was early.”
“Got it,” Carmina said, biting back a grin. “Quickie.” She gave him a thumbs-up.
“Car.” Tom slid to his knees in front of her and took her hand in both of his. She reared back a little in surprise. “If he’s out of the running, I want back in. We’ll figure it out. Please? Just give me a chance.”
“Why?” she asked, genuinely puzzled. “I’m all messed up.” She blew out a breath. “Words fail me. All the time. When I’m nervous. Or sad, or angry, or just because. I’m probably always going to need Buster.”
“You didn’t bring him tonight,” Tom pointed out.
“I know that sometimes I use him as a crutch,” she admitted. “I didn’t need him here. I had you guys, and Sam and King. Jane. My support group. Right?” She looked over at Danny.
“That I can do,” Danny agreed with a relieved sigh. “Don’t get me wrong. You are an amazing woman, and if I was looking for someone in my life like that right now, I wouldn’t be bowing out. But I’m messed up, too.” He pointed to his head. “Up here. I have some things I’ve got to take care of before I can move on. And you don’t need my shit on top of yours.” He groaned. “That didn’t come out right, either. I can’t seem to say the right thing around you.”
“Welcome to the club,” Carmina said drily. Tom laughed and scooted closer so he could wrap his arms around her.
“How close can I get while I’m supporting you?” he whispered into her ear. She glanced over at Danny. He was watching them with an indecipherable look.
“I guess we can try pretty close,” she told Tom. Tom felt so good pressed against her. But she couldn’t tear her gaze away from Danny. She hadn’t forgotten her fantasy about the two of them. But there was no way that could happen now, right? She looked away from Danny and wrapped her arms around Tom, burying her face in his shoulder. This was what she needed. Someone who believed in her. But a small part of her would miss the way Danny had treated her this morning. Which was all kinds of fucked-up. But then, she already knew she was fucked-up, right?
Misconduct Page 11
