“Does that mean you don’t want to do this?” Danny said, his voice flat. “That sounded like a goodbye.”
“I’m not good with words,” she told him. “I’m trying to say that I want to. I want you. Both. But I come with a warning label.”
“We should all have a warning label,” Danny said, heaving himself up to his knees. “What we just did probably broke some laws, not to mention a few codes of conduct.” Carmina and Tom both laughed.
Tom climbed off the bed. “Shower time. Then bedtime. Tomorrow is another day.”
“Another day to break some laws,” Carmina teased.
“Break the rules,” Danny added.
“We’re Rebels,” Tom said with a shrug. “It’s what we do.” He leaned over and picked Carmina up in his arms as she laughed, and he headed for the shower, Danny following behind.
—
Carmina walked quietly through the dark living room heading toward the kitchen. She could see Danny highlighted by the refrigerator light as he stood there staring into it. She was pretty sure it wasn’t hunger or thirst that had him up at three a.m., however.
“Looking for something?” she asked quietly as she came to a halt in the kitchen doorway. She didn’t want to crowd Danny, literally or figuratively.
Danny jumped a little and looked over his shoulder in surprise. “Couldn’t sleep,” he said, closing the refrigerator door and plunging them back into semidarkness. “Sorry if I woke you. Is Tom still asleep?”
“I think so.” She moved into the kitchen, got a glass from the cabinet, and filled it at the sink.
“You’ve got something on your mind,” Danny said, leaning back against the counter. He was wearing a pair of boxer briefs and nothing else. Carmina was pretty sure Danny knew how that would affect her.
“So are we going to do this?” she asked casually, trying to keep the tension out of her voice.
“This?” Danny asked in confusion.
“You, me, Tom,” she clarified.
“I thought we settled that earlier. Unless you’re having second thoughts.” Danny’s tone was neutral.
“No, not me.” She set her glass down. “You know how I feel about both of you. But this is new for you. The you and me part. The you and Tom part, too, I guess.”
“Not going to lie. I’m a little freaked out by that.” Danny blew out a breath. “I mean he’s Tom, right? And we’re close as brothers. But brothers don’t do that shit. So what I feel must not be like that. It’s like…something else.”
“Boy, you are having a hard time with it,” Tom said from the kitchen doorway. “I love you. But you’ve known that for a while, haven’t you?”
“You’re awake,” Carmina said. “I’m sorry. That’s probably my fault.”
“Nah,” Tom said. “It’s Danny’s fault.” He turned back to Danny. “You didn’t answer.”
“Yeah,” Danny admitted reluctantly. “I knew it. I just didn’t want to admit it or go there.”
“Well, we went there.” Tom nodded. “Now is the time you tell us how you feel.”
“I thought I just did,” Danny said defensively.
“Right. Something else, not brothers,” Tom summarized. “That clears it right up. What about Carmina?” Carmina tried not to feel let down. Danny had been closed off for years. He wasn’t going to just throw open the doors and let his emotions fall out now.
“I care for you both a lot,” Danny said, sounding uncomfortable.
Carmina picked up her glass and stared at Danny over the rim as she took a sip. “That is the most pathetic declaration of love I have ever heard,” she finally said. “But I’ll take it.”
“Good,” Danny said with obvious relief. “I’ll work on it. I promise.”
“Love is a scary thing,” she said, setting the glass down again. “I know. I’ve kind of been freaking out about it, too. It’s a ton of responsibility. I’m still not sure I’m ready.”
“You’re both thinking about it the wrong way,” Tom said. “It isn’t something to be scared of. There are no expectations or responsibilities that come attached to my love or yours. It just is. It’s how I feel and it’s going to influence everything I do with you. But ultimately, it’s about me, and not you. I love you whether you love me back or not. It’s a gift. See? So don’t feel obligated to return it, or pressured to feel it.”
They stood there like that for a few seconds, each one isolated in their respective corner of the kitchen. When Danny spoke first, it surprised Carmina.
“Today, when I walked away from Peltz, I realized that I owed it to you,” he said to Tom. “You’ve taught me how to trust over the last year, how to open up and let someone in. And you made me part of your life, too. You made me part of something bigger—a friendship, a team—and I didn’t want to lose that. Hating everybody and everything was exhausting. I didn’t want to go back there. That means something, right? No one else could make me do that before I met you.” He turned to Carmina. “And because of him I was able to let you in, too. And I discovered that I have a lot to give. You’ve shown me that I’m more than my past, good or bad, and that it takes more strength to move on and live again than it does to retreat into that ball of hate. I want to be that guy, the one who walked away from hate. Because I was walking toward this.” He rubbed the top of his head self-consciously. “I think it’s pretty rare for people who want what we do to find each other, you know? I don’t think that’s something to throw away.”
“Then let’s not throw it away,” Tom said.
“I’m ready to try to make this work. So far, honestly, this love thing is a lot easier than the hate thing,” Danny agreed.
“Okay, that means something,” Tom said, sounding choked up at Danny’s confession.
“Yeah, it does,” Carmina said, a little shaky with emotion. “And I want it, too. I do. This, I mean. I want it to work. But”—she turned to Tom—“I get what you’re saying. It doesn’t have to go anywhere. It doesn’t have to work out. Because the love is here and it just is.” It felt like a huge weight had just fallen from her shoulders. That’s where she’d gone wrong with Richie. She hadn’t been able to just accept the love they shared. She had treated it like a burden, instead of a gift. She wasn’t going to do that ever again. And she knew Richie would approve. “I’m going to accept it and see where it takes me. My life has been one challenge after another the last few years, and I feel like I’ve been a taker and not a giver. It’s kind of nice to be the one to give for a change, and to know that I can do it. So, yeah, the way I’m feeling right now, that’s love. And it is selfish. It makes me feel good.” She grinned. “It makes me feel very good. So, I can do this. Totally.”
Tom laughed. “Okay then. I guess we just became a thing. The three of us.”
“Don’t expect me to be all up on you in public,” Danny warned, glancing between them. “I’m not there yet.”
“Me, neither,” Carmina said. “Been there, done that. Didn’t work for me.”
“I can see I’m going to have to work on the fun factor,” Tom told them. “First, our media name. Dantomina? Tominadan? Cardantom?”
“Oh, hell, no,” Danny said, grinning. “De la Smith Kelly.”
“De la Dantom,” Carmina said. She was already thinking about what photos to post on social media. “I’ll try it out tomorrow. It’ll be a huge distraction from the rumble in the jungle yesterday. Or today. I’m all confused. What time is it?” She looked around for a clock, frowning.
“Way too late or way too early to be having serious discussions,” Tom told her. He grabbed her hand. “Let’s hit the hay. I need sleep. You two are going to wear me out.”
“We’ll try to pick up the slack,” Danny said drily from behind him. Carmina reached back and snagged his hand as they headed for the bedroom.
“That’s the spirit,” Tom told him. “I can’t misbehave alone.”
“I have a feeling we’re all going to earn a few misconduct penalties,” Danny teased. He stepped
up next to Carmina and slid his arm around her waist. His warmth seeped into her side as Tom’s warm, rough hand cradled hers. For the first time in a very long time, Carmina didn’t feel alone. She knew everything wasn’t perfect. There were rough patches ahead—with her recovery, over what had happened with the Rough Riders, and the public reaction to their new relationship. She didn’t care about any of that. Not when she had some seriously dirty misconduct on her mind.
For my husband, who believes in me. Every. Damn. Day. I love you more than words can say. And that’s a lot for an author.
Acknowledgments
I’d like to thank the entire team at Penguin Random House and Loveswept for making me look good on a consistent basis. My editor, Junessa Viloria, is amazing and supportive and all the wonderful things you need an excellent editor to be. Sue Grimshaw and Gina Wachtel have been in my corner since my first Loveswept book, and their support means the world to me. Thanks also go out to the Penguin Random House art department for such amazing covers and to the marketing department for always having my back and working tirelessly to promote my books.
Thank you to my critique partner and football expert, J. D. Allen. Without her, this series might never have become a reality. My marketing guru, Kimberley Rocha of Book Obsessed Chicks Promotions, has been incredibly helpful in so many ways. And last, but so very important, thank you to the Kaniacs, my street team and readers who inspire me to keep writing every day.
BY SAMANTHA KANE
Birmingham Rebels
Broken Play
Calling the Play
Jacked Up
Misconduct
The Saint’s Devils
The Devil’s Thief
Tempting a Devil
Devil in My Arms
SAMANTHA KANE lives in North Carolina with her husband and three children—two boys and one girl. With a master’s degree in American history, she spent seven years as a high school history teacher before becoming a full-time writer and mom.
samanthakane.us
facebook.com/SamanthaKane.author
@skaneauthor
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Misconduct Page 26
