“You won’t tell him your address?” Gabe asked. “That’s gangsta.”
Ben rolled his eyes, and Ryan let the comment go without a response because she didn’t know what to say. They played two more rounds, after which it became clear that Ben and Ryan were completely incompatible as far as teammates went. Even Gabe and Serena outscored them eighteen to six. Aly and Jace seemed poised to take their Taboo-playing skills on the road. They finished with twenty-three points.
They hung out a little while after the game ended, but Ryan’s head wasn’t in it. Granted, she doubted Ben’s parents were going to challenge them to a game of Taboo at the wedding, but their lackluster performance didn’t bode well for how convincing they were as a couple.
When they finally left, the atmosphere between them was thick with discomfort. They’d hardly said anything to one another during the first ten minutes of the ride. So when Ben pulled over onto the shoulder, parked the car, and twisted to look at her, Ryan expected him to call the whole thing off.
What she didn’t expect was for him to say, “Move in with me.”
Chapter Thirteen
“I’m sorry, what now?” Ryan asked, sure she’d heard him wrong.
“We may literally be the shittiest Taboo players on the planet.” Ben sighed heavily and rubbed a hand over his face as if this news was sincerely devastating.
“Yeah,” she replied, drawing the word out in hopes he’d explain why that mattered.
“Gabe doesn’t even know that girl, and they kicked our asses.”
It started to dawn on Ryan what Ben was getting at. “We don’t know each other that well either. And it’s only a game. I’m sure there are plenty of couples who’d do as badly as we did.”
Ben’s unimpressed stare told her he thought she was full of shit. And maybe she was. But she couldn’t understand why he looked like he’d been sentenced to the guillotine. “I think you’re overreacting. I highly doubt your parents are going to bust out board games to test our compatibility.”
“It’s not that. Like you said, we barely know each other. We’re never going to be able to pull this off if we don’t spend more time together.”
Ryan snorted a laugh. “How’d we jump from more time to every waking hour?”
“Roommates learn things about each other faster than normal friends. You’ll see my quirks firsthand. It’ll be like dating hide-and-go-seek.”
“More like Russian Roulette, because one of us would definitely kill the other.”
“Will you think about it?” Ben asked. They stared at one another for a second, and Ryan saw the pleading in his eyes. She wasn’t sure why this was so important to him. Any of this: the insistence on taking a date to the wedding, the desire to fool his parents into believing he was in a serious relationship, the need to hire a professional even though he had to know women who’d do it for far less money, or none at all.
But she also couldn’t ignore the fact that she liked Ben. And because of that, she realized that what was important to him had somewhere along the way become important to her too. So even though she knew what he was asking was ridiculous, she found herself unable to refuse it outright. “Okay. I’ll think about it.”
He let out a deep breath as though a battle had been won. “Thank you,” he said before turning to look at oncoming traffic and pulling back onto the road.
They drove in silence for a while before Ryan felt the need to disrupt it. “Tell me something about you no one else knows.”
“Did we drive onto the set of a romantic comedy?”
“What?” Ryan asked, feeling her face scrunch up in confusion.
“That’s the kind of question people ask each other in sappy movies.”
“Yeah, well, asking a stranger to move in with you sounds like something from a horror movie, but you don’t see me giving you a hard time about it.”
Ben smiled. “You’re definitely giving me a hard time about it.”
“How?” she squawked.
“By not simply agreeing to move in.”
“You’re annoying,” she muttered.
“Can that be the thing no one knows about me?”
Ryan glared at him, which he must have sensed because he turned briefly to look at her before bursting out laughing. “Okay, okay. Let me think.”
He was quiet for a few minutes, which made Ryan think he was never going to answer her. So she used the time to study him instead. Everything about him screamed of his confidence as he drove. The way his hand was casually draped over the wheel, how his seat was reclined slightly so he relaxed back into it, the way his head bobbed a little with the soft music that played on the radio. The only thing that belied that calm demeanor was the way his focus darted continuously from the windshield to his rearview mirror, back to the windshield, then to his side mirror. Though he may seem to be driving on autopilot at first glance, Ben was intensely focused on his task.
Ryan found herself drawn to that dichotomy. The guy who could in one moment be the epitome of a self-assured man and then become almost hesitant and insecure in the next. It gave him a realness that Ryan hadn’t encountered in many men in her life. Despite the fact that their entire arrangement was a lie, Ben wasn’t in and of himself a liar. It was almost startling for her to realize that she trusted Ben. The fact that he was a good guy almost seemed to ooze from his pores. It was that innate goodness he had about him that had caused her to agree to this whole ridiculous ruse to begin with. Ben would never hurt her—at least not intentionally. Of that she was certain.
But did that mean it was a good idea to take this even further? To move in with him? To completely upset her life—unimpressive as it was—to spend more time with someone who was trying to more expertly construct a lie so he could save himself some grief from his family? Someone she was insanely attracted to but who would always think of her as an escort? And would she be able to maintain her own lie while getting to know him better?
The questions swirled in her head, making her so distanced from the moment, she almost didn’t hear him when he finally began talking.
“I almost didn’t go pro,” he said.
Her head whipped toward him, and it took her a second to process that he was telling her something no one else knew. “Why not?”
He shrugged. “Wasn’t sure who I wanted to be.”
* * *
Ben couldn’t believe he was telling her this. He’d never told anyone else that he’d almost given up the sport he loved, and he wasn’t sure why he was telling Ryan now. He could’ve made up anything, but he found himself wanting to be honest with her.
“My parents came to every one of my hockey games growing up. I was dedicated to it from the beginning, and they thought it was teaching me strong values. They also liked how good I was at it,” Ben added with a smile. He’d almost forgotten there was a time his parents had been proud of how well he played the sport. Not that they weren’t proud of him now, because on some level he knew they were. But it was a different pride. Not as pure as it had been when he was a kid.
“When scouts started coming around when I was a teenager, my parents put their foot down. College was non-negotiable. I know they hoped I’d fall in love with a major, and maybe a girl, and decide to go down a different path. When I talked about playing professionally, they were fairly . . . dismissive of it. Like it was a phase they were only tolerating because they were sure I’d grow out of it.”
“That’s so strange to me. I feel like most parents would be over the moon if their kid could go pro.”
“My parents are academics. They can appreciate the commitment it takes to get to that level, but they can’t quite get past the fact that I am getting my head bashed in on a regular basis. In their minds, they were raising future doctors or lawyers. Instead, they got a guy who’s probably doing irreparable damage to his body. It comes from a place of concern. I do know that. But it still sucks to not have them solidly in my corner.”
“So you were going to give it
all up to make them happy?” Ryan asked, bringing the discussion back to what had started it in the first place.
“I owe them a lot. They worked so hard to give us the best life they could. It made me feel like I owed it to them to repay them for it.”
“What changed your mind?”
Ben smiled with the memory. “Gabe, actually. He ran to the apartment we shared when we were seniors all excited. The Phoenix Sun Devils had drafted him, and he was so happy, talking about how lucky we all were because we were going to get to do the things we loved most. It made me realize I was going to have to choose what I loved more.”
“Hockey or making your parents happy?”
Ben glanced over at her. “My parents or myself.”
A slow smile overtook Ryan’s face as she reached over and squeezed his thigh. “For what it’s worth, I think you chose correctly.”
“Me too. But it also means I don’t want to add insult to injury, you know? I may not have made them as supremely happy as I could have, but I can give them the small things.”
“Like settling down with a nice librarian?”
Ben laughed, and he was damn thankful to Ryan for lightening the heavy mood. “Yup,” he replied. There was more to it. Jesus, there was so much more to it his chest almost ached with the withholding of it. But that wasn’t a story for tonight. In all honesty, it wasn’t a story he was likely to ever share with her.
“I get it,” she added.
They were quiet for the rest of the drive, but there wasn’t any tension between them. It was peaceful driving through the city with her, enjoying her presence beside him. She called for a cab when they got close to Ben’s place, and it was waiting for her when she arrived. He pulled up behind it so she could hop out.
She unbuckled her seatbelt and looked over at him. “Despite our epic defeat, I had fun tonight.”
“Despite my freak-out, I did too.”
She smiled at him before opening her door and climbing out. But instead of closing it, she leaned her head back in. “I can be ready to move in whenever you want me to.”
Ben couldn’t have kept the smile off his face if he’d tried, but before he could reply, she spoke again. “But I think we should maybe keep it professional. If we’re going to be convincing, and I’m not going to break under the pressure of lying, we should try to minimize distractions.”
“I’m distracting, am I?”
Ryan rolled her eyes. “You know you are.”
“You’re proposing a sex ban?”
“That is the least hot way you could’ve phrased that. But yes.”
He wanted to argue with her, but knew it probably was for the best. He already knew they were compatible in bed. They needed to work on their compatibility out of it. “Deal,” he replied.
“Sweet. Call me tomorrow, and we’ll figure out the details.”
“Will do. And thank you.”
“Don’t thank me yet. You may be ready for the loony bin after living with me.” She gave him one final smile before closing the door and getting into her cab.
Ben drove into the parking garage and pulled into his spot, thinking about how he was about to have a woman living with him for the first time in his adult life. And how much he was looking forward to it.
Chapter Fourteen
“So you asked her to move in with you? Out of nowhere?” Jace asked as his pool stick made contact with the cue ball.
“Pretty much, yeah,” Ben replied. He nestled his beer bottle between his legs on the stool, his thumb scraping at the label as he watched Jace play by himself. He took a quick look around the Players’ Club. Mike Tarino, the club’s owner, nodded to him when they made eye contact. Ben nodded back.
“What’d she say?” Jace asked as he circled the table looking for his next shot.
“At first, she stared at me like I’d lost my mind.”
“Have you?” Jace asked.
Ben shrugged. “I figured that after getting slaughtered at Game Night by a couple who barely knew each other, maybe we needed to do something to speed up the getting to know each other process if my parents are going to buy us as a couple.”
“Dude, I’m pretty sure winning Taboo isn’t a requirement for dating someone.”
“Says the guy who won.”
Jace looked up at him and smirked before taking another shot.
The sound of balls clacking loudly against each other filled Ben’s ears as his mind drifted to Ryan and how much he owed her for doing this for him. He wasn’t stupid. He knew a lot of the draw was probably the money. But he also felt like she was doing it for him too. Maybe thinking that way made him delusional, but he couldn’t help how he felt.
Jace cleared the table and stood up straight, holding the stick beside him with the end resting on the ground. “Come on, play a game with me.”
“No. I can’t take losing again to you this week.”
Jace snorted. “You’re such a baby.”
Ben chose to ignore that. “Torres should be here soon. He’ll play with you.”
“Nah, physical therapy always makes him bitchy,” Jace said as he hung up his stick and sat beside Ben. “So what was the deciding verdict? She moving in?”
“Yup.”
Jace’s brow shot up. “Really?”
“Why do you sound so surprised? I can be quite persuasive.”
“That sounds . . . oddly sexual.”
Ben laughed. “Fuck off.”
“But really, how’d you get her to agree? She didn’t even want you to know where she lived, and now she’s willing to move in? That’s kind of weird.”
Ben didn’t want to get into how he’d cut himself open and let a bit of his soul bleed out. Especially since the reason he’d told her had nothing to do with convincing her to move in. That had happened to be a happy byproduct.
He had to admit, the thought of living with Ryan was a little thrilling. He’d so rarely been reckless in his life—unless you listened to his parents who thought his entire adult life had been punctuated by one reckless decision after another. It felt good to be impulsive.
“Do you need help moving her in?” Jace asked.
“She said she didn’t need help. But she plans to bring her stuff over tomorrow.”
Jace’s eyes narrowed as his forehead crinkled, but he didn’t say anything.
Rolling his eyes, Ben said, “Say it before you explode.”
“I just . . . remember when you told me not to play around with Aly’s feelings?”
“Yeah. But I’m not leading her on or anything. I’m paying her for her time, for Christ’s sake.”
Looking at him for a second, Jace finally said, “It’s not her feelings I’m worried about.” Jace stood. “I’m gonna get another beer. Want one?”
Ben shook his head. Jace walked toward the bar and started a conversation with Mike, for which Ben was grateful. He needed a second alone to mull over Jace’s words. Because while his first instinct was to laugh off what Jace had said, part of Ben couldn’t quite bring himself to do so.
* * *
Ryan sat on the floor as she folded her clothes and placed them into her duffel bag. She heard Camille come up behind her.
“You do know you can stay here as long as you want, right? I know my couch isn’t exactly home sweet home, but I bet it’s a lot more comfortable than a coffin.”
Ryan laughed. Camille had been saying things like that since Ryan had told her about Ben’s invitation. If it could really be called an invitation. It had come across as more of a business proposition, which was good. Their situation was complicated enough. They needed to be honest about where they stood with one another. “He’s harmless.”
“That’s what they said about Ted Bundy.”
Ryan set down her shirt and turned so she could look at Camille. “I appreciate that you’re worried about me. I really do. But I promise you that I know what I’m doing.”
“It’s not what you do that concerns me. It’s what he might do.”
Ryan smiled slightly as she shrugged. “I can’t do much more than promise you he’s a good guy.”
Camille sighed. “I know I’m being annoyingly overprotective. But . . . you don’t live around here for as long as I have without seeing some bad stuff. So you need to promise that you’ll check in and I’ll back off.”
Ryan’s first instinct was to point out that she’d seen her own fair share of bad stuff. A lot of it in her own home. But Camille’s concern was endearing, and it caused Ryan to smile more fully. “I promise.”
“Okay.” She started to walk away but didn’t get far before she spoke again. “So don’t forget to call me regularly, including updates from the wedding. And maybe you could give me his name or address. You know, in case I don’t hear from you and need to send out the National Guard.”
“I’ll have to check on the address thing. But I’ll figure out some way for you to track me down, okay?”
“Okay,” Camille said, looking somewhat mollified.
Ryan turned back to what she was doing, but after a few seconds, Camille spoke again. “For what it’s worth, I’ll miss having you here, and you’re welcome back after your time with him is done.”
Tears pricked at Ryan’s eyes. When was the last time someone said they’d miss me? She took a deep breath in an attempt to rein in her emotions before she swiveled around to face Camille again. “It’s worth a lot. And I’ll miss you too. But now we get to graduate from roommates to good friends. We’ll still see each other.” Ryan doubted she’d be moving back in with Camille, since she’d have plenty of money to get herself a place to live after all of this. But she was telling the truth when she’d said she wanted them to remain friends. Ryan had learned that good friends were hard to find. And even though she and Camille hadn’t gotten extraordinarily close during their time living together, Ryan realized that she did trust Camille to be there if Ryan needed her. And it was a kindness that Ryan would gladly repay if the need ever arose.
Camille looked a little doubtful, but said, “I’d like that.” She gave Ryan a tentative smile before heading to her bedroom and closing the door.
The Proposition Page 10
