She caught a glimpse of him next to David at their table. It was a shame that the bridal party was seated at a long table at the front of the room because that meant she didn’t get to sit next to him—something neither of them had realized until they’d arrived at the reception. But watching him up there with his brother, each with a smile on his face as they laughed with one another, made the fact that she was sitting in a sea of strangers a little more tolerable. Especially since she did have Jace, Aly, Gabe, and . . . whatever Gabe’s date’s name was. And if Ben could try to have a good time, so could she.
“So how do all of you know David and Natasha?” she asked the couple sitting beside her.
The woman, who reminded her of a younger Bette Midler, spoke first. “I’m Carol. I’m Natasha’s advisor for her doctoral program.”
“Oh wow!” Ryan hadn’t even realized that she’d never asked what Natasha did. “What program is she in?”
“Medical physics. John is actually one of her professors,” she added, pointing to the man seated next to her.
Ryan introduced herself to them and tried not to act as impressed as she was by Natasha’s career path. Though she’d heard of medical physicists, Ryan didn’t think any actually existed in real life. As far as she was concerned, they were akin to unicorns or Big Foot.
“What about you? How do you know Natasha and David?” John asked.
“Oh, I actually don’t . . . know them well, at least. I met them a few days ago. David’s brother is my boyfriend.”
“The hockey player,” the woman said. It wasn’t a question, which made Ryan think that clearly Natasha had talked about Ben.
Ryan nodded, not that the comment warranted a confirmation, and leaned back so the server could take her salad plate away and set down her entree. She made small talk with the others at the table until there was an announcement that it was time for the toasts.
Ben got up, buttoning his jacket as he walked on to the dance floor and faced the newly married couple. He removed a paper from his inside jacket pocket and unfolded it. He stared down at it for a moment without speaking and then raised his head to look at Natasha and David.
“I had a speech planned,” Ben began. “But I don’t really feel like it’s fitting anymore.” He folded up the paper neatly and returned it to its place in his pocket. “It was too generic. And there were some jokes in there that I didn’t even understand. But I guess that’s what I get for searching the internet for best man speeches.”
Natasha smiled and shook her head good naturedly.
Ben took a deep breath and when he released it, he seemed to relax. His rigid shoulders fell a bit as he slid one hand into his pocket. “I think I’m just going to try to speak from the heart even though I’ve never been great at expressing myself through words. I know there are millions of them . . . or maybe even billions to choose from, but I can never seem to find the right ones.” The audience let out a chuckle that sounded as nervous as Ryan was sure Ben was. She assumed that his composed exterior wasn’t representative of the way he felt inside.
“David’s always been the better communicator. He was captain of the debate club in high school, wrote for his college newspaper while he was at Hudnell. Come to think of it, he was also the bigger nerd.” David and Natasha both laughed out loud, as did much of the room. “Anyway,” he continued. “I remember when we were little and David would do something to make me mad, I would hit him. Actually, I did that when I wasn’t so little too.”
Ben paused and took a breath, and Ryan looked over at David, who was watching Ben intently.
“Our mom was always telling me to use my words, and I remember thinking how crazy that was because my fist was so much stronger than my vocabulary.”
That comment earned another laugh from everyone. Ryan looked to Beverly, whose eyes seemed to glisten as she watched the interaction between her sons.
He cleared his throat before continuing. “I never thought I’d be standing up here as best man giving a speech at my older brother’s wedding. David and I have had our share of differences over the past decade or so. Some of you already know that, but I’m sure that most the people sitting in this room have no idea what I’m talking about.” Ben looked at his mother, and Ryan could see the warning in her eyes. Ben was going to endure Beverly’s wrath if he put any more of their family’s business out there, especially during David’s wedding.
“If you don’t know what I’m talking about, you’re not missing much. The story itself isn’t all that exciting,” he said. “It’s what happened after that that’s worth telling. Because if you want to know what a good love story is, take a look at the couple who got married here today.” He gestured to Natasha and David. “Anyone who knows them can tell how in love they are. And I couldn’t be happier for them. So please join me in raising your glass.” He nearly jogged over to where he’d been sitting and grabbed his champagne flute to hold it in the air. “David and Natasha, I wish you many years filled with love and a lifetime of happiness together. You both deserve it.”
The guests all took a sip from their glass and applauded. As Ben sat, Ryan could tell he was relieved that the spotlight was off him. Renee gave her speech next, and once dinner was served, the night passed fairly quickly. Ben was more fun on the dance floor than he was off it. Somehow he seemed lighter than he had since they’d gotten to Connecticut. It made her wonder what happened between the brothers. “So you and David . . . ?” she asked, pulling her head off Ben’s shoulder so she could look up at him as they danced slowly.
“We’re good, I think.” Ben nodded, like he was assuring himself as much as he was her. “Or it’s the start of ‘good’ at least.”
Not knowing what else to say, she said the only thing she could think of. “I’m happy for you.”
And as she rested her head back against Ben’s chest, he whispered, “Me too.”
Chapter Thirty-Two
“Okay, everyone. This amazing night is coming to a close, but I’m going to play one more slow song for you. Let’s get everyone out on the dance floor with our bride and groom,” the DJ said into the microphone.
Ryan and Ben were sitting at her table with Jace, Aly, Gabe, and . . . dammit! Ryan still hadn’t caught Gabe’s date’s name. Ryan watched the other couples stand and then noticed Ben doing the same.
“May I have this dance?” he asked.
She smiled and put her hand in his outstretched one. They made it to the dance floor as James Arthur’s “Say You Won’t Let Go” began playing. “I love this song,” Ryan said as Ben drew her closer.
“Me too,” he whispered against her hair as they began to sway together.
The words of the song infused every fiber of Ryan’s soul. When he sang about how the woman he met made him feel like he was enough, Ryan closed her eyes and let the words become her truth. Because Ben had made her feel that way from the beginning. He’d never made her feel less than because he thought she was an escort. Ryan was pretty sure he actually thought more highly of her than he should.
The words talked about the man pulling the woman closer, and Ben’s arms hugged Ryan tighter. It made her feel safe and wanted.
The song continued to say the words Ryan was afraid to give her own voice to. How the singer loved the girl, but he was too afraid to show her, afraid of what letting go would mean for him. How he needed her, but he couldn’t let her know how deep his desires ran.
Ryan had been running from these feelings for weeks. She’d known they were there, but had actively tried to avoid thinking about them. Because thinking about them would make her acknowledge them, and acknowledging them would make it all real. But what they had wasn’t real. Was it?
As the beautiful voice filled the room, asking his beloved to never let him go, Ryan looked up at Ben. Even in the dim room, she could see the way his eyes blazed. There was no missing the intent look on his face as he stared at her. She moved her hand to cup the back of his neck and rubbed soft circles there with her thum
b.
He then brought a hand up to touch her cheek. And as the singer sang about wanting to be with the woman he loved until they were old and gray, Ben pulled Ryan into a kiss that said everything they hadn’t been able to. It was gentle yet unyielding, passionate but with a clear intent. This kiss was a promise—a promise that there could be more. That their story didn’t have to only be about a hockey player and an escort. It could be about Ben and Ryan. And that would be more than enough. It would, in fact, be everything.
They kissed until the song ended and the lights grew brighter. Everyone else had fallen away, and it was only them, still swaying to music only they could hear.
A clatter of dishes brought them back to themselves, and they slowly pulled apart though Ryan kept her eyes closed. Because if she was dreaming, she didn’t want to wake up.
“I think the wedding is over.” Ben’s breath ghosted over her sensitive lips as he spoke, and she had to bite back a moan. “We should probably go back to our room.”
That idea had Ryan’s eyes shooting open. “Yes, we should definitely do that. Right now.” Her entire body was aroused as goose bumps spread over her skin. She could feel the wetness between her legs, and the thought of Ben touching her there made her shiver.
Ben didn’t respond. Instead, he grabbed Ryan’s hand and pulled her toward the exit.
“Shouldn’t we say goodbye to your friends and family?” she asked.
Ben released what sounded like a growl before pulling her over to his brother and parents, where they said such a quick goodbye Ryan nearly got whiplash.
“That was kind of rude,” Ryan whispered when Ben led her away.
Ben stopped abruptly and turned around, causing Ryan to bump into him. And the impressive bulge in his pants. His voice was husky when he spoke in her ear. “Do you feel what you do to me?”
She nodded, too breathless to respond.
“Then you understand why I have no intention of having a long conversation with anyone right now.”
“Yeah, I think I get it,” she murmured as her eyes locked onto his lips and she ran her tongue over the bottom one of hers.
Ben groaned. “If you don’t knock that off, we’re not going to make it upstairs before I’m inside of you.”
“Jesus Christ,” she whimpered as he again began pulling her toward the exit. They all but ran onto an elevator, where they were stuck with some of Ben’s extended family who must have somehow missed the sexual desperation that was radiating from them because they insisted on making small talk on the way up. Finally, Ben and Ryan arrived at their floor, and Ben grunted a goodbye before leading her into the hallway and to their room.
Ben fumbled with the keycard, but once he got it open, he hustled her in, threw the keycard in the general direction of a table, and then pinned her against the door. “I can’t . . . I don’t . . .” He took a deep breath and started over. “I need you.”
Ryan let a smirk slowly roll onto her face. “You’ve got me.”
* * *
Ben felt like he was going to ignite into flames. Part of it was probably the way the fabric of his tux felt against his raging hard-on as he walked to the room, but most of it was because Ryan was under his skin. Like she’d burrowed there and made herself at home. It was a feeling he was surprised to find he loved. And it made him want to protect her, support her, claim her.
He let the entire length of his body press hers into the door so she could feel all of him. “I’m not going to be able to be patient,” he told her as he nipped and licked at her jaw.
“Good,” she replied, panting.
He moved down to suck on the soft skin on her neck. “I’m not going to be able to be gentle either.”
She moaned as he sucked. “Don’t want you to be.”
His hands moved to her breasts and massaged them roughly over her dress as his mouth moved to her shoulder and sucked hard enough to leave a mark. Her hands brushed over his hair and tugged as she arched at the contact.
Moving his hands to her back, he dragged the zipper on her dress down and let it fall to the floor. He also made short work of her bra and thong, finding himself supremely turned on at her being naked while he was still fully clothed. His fingers drifted down her body until they found her ass, and he kneaded the toned flesh there for a second before hoisting her up.
She wrapped her legs around him as he carried her to the bed. He dropped her onto it before whipping off his jacket and then sprawling on top of her. Grinding against her, he didn’t move to free his aching cock from his pants. Ben needed something from her first.
“Please,” she moaned. “Oh, Ben, please.”
That was what he needed. Needed her to be as hot for him as he was for her. Needed her to want him as badly as he wanted her. And then maybe, just maybe, he could convince her to keep him.
He kissed down her body slowly, untying his bow tie along the way. When he reached the apex of her thighs, he popped open the top few buttons of his shirt. He didn’t want anything restricting him.
When he licked over her clit, she nearly bucked off the bed. Her fingers found their way to her nipples, pinching them as he continued to flick at the most sensitive part of her. Ben could taste her arousal on his tongue, and he reveled in it, dove in deeper get more of her in his mouth.
He let one hand drift down to his cock, and he palmed it through the zipper before working to free himself. Jerking himself slowly, he continued to tongue fuck her with abandon.
“Oh my God,” Ryan moaned as her body constricted. He felt her convulse around his tongue, her entire body seeming to clench in on itself before relaxing again. Her heavy breaths made her chest rise and fall rapidly.
Ben stood and watched her spread beautifully for him on the bed as he stripped out of his clothes, grabbed a condom, and rolled it on. Climbing on top of her, he kissed her deeply before lining himself up and pushing into her. He held himself up on his forearms, his face hovering directly above hers.
Her fingernails scored down his back as he pumped wildly. His release had been within reach since they’d walked in the room, but now he was torn between hurtling toward it as fast as possible and dragging this out, because this was by far the best sex he’d ever had and he didn’t want it to be over.
The walls of her pussy were wet and tight after her orgasm, and Ben found his thrusts stuttering. It felt too good for him to hold off. He consoled himself with the knowledge that they could have this again and again. Because he was sure as fuck not letting her go.
Sweat trickled down his brow as he felt a tingle travel up his spine. Then, suddenly, the tingle turned into lightning, and he was coming, pumping into her as she quaked under him from a second orgasm. He snapped his hips a few more times, letting his cock wring itself dry. Then he lowered himself down so he could kiss her again, not yet wanting to pull out of her and lose the connection they’d shared.
They kissed lazily as the exhaustion of the day caught up with them. He finally dragged himself away from her long enough to get something to clean them up with. Then he climbed into bed and pulled her to him.
She settled against him and sighed happily. It was then that he realized that they’d shared virtually no words since they’d found their way to the bed. Ben knew they had things to say, but for now, the actions had been enough. There’d be time to talk tomorrow.
Chapter Thirty-Three
Bright light streamed into the hotel room, casting an angelic glow around Ryan as Ben lay beside her with his head on his arm, staring at her. Watching someone sleep had never been his thing before, but he’d developed quite a habit of watching Ryan. Probably because he never tired of looking at her. Her dark hair was resting at odd angles around her head, and she hadn’t quite gotten all her eye makeup off before falling asleep the previous night, but none of that detracted from the sight in front of him. If anything, her realness made her more appealing.
He lifted his head slightly so he could see the clock on the bedside table behind her. It
was a little after nine. They needed to be at his parents’ for brunch at eleven. Ben knew he should wake Ryan up so she’d have ample time to get ready, but he didn’t want to leave the cocoon of perfection they’d created in this room. The real world was overrated.
Ben let out a deep sigh at the thought of having to move, which caused Ryan to stir. Her eyes opened slowly, and once they focused on him, she smiled. “Hey.”
“Hey.” Ben briefly wondered why they never came up with anything more creative to say to one another, but Ryan’s moving closer to him and dropping her head on his chest made all coherent thought disappear. When she was touching him, all he could do was feel. Which was probably why the next words from his mouth came out all wrong. “We need to talk.”
Ryan’s body tensed atop his. “Okay,” she said cautiously. “About what?”
“This.” He tightened his arm around her. “Us.”
“Is there an ‘us’ to talk about?”
“I want there to be.”
He felt her relax into him again. “Okay. You want to talk now or when we get home?” she asked.
Trying not to let the excitement he felt at hearing her call his place “home” ooze out of his skin, Ben kept his voice neutral. “Since we have to be at my parents’ in about an hour, we should probably wait until we get home.”
Ryan made no attempt to move. “Sounds good.”
They lazed around for another half hour before getting ready. They did so without much talking—the atmosphere around them saying more than words ever could. They drove over to his parents’ hand in hand as Ryan sang along with the radio and Ben pretended to find it annoying. They ended up only being about ten minutes late, but judging by how many cars were in the driveway, they were still among the last to arrive.
The Proposition Page 21
