“I’m not going to last,” Connor finally admitted when Zane’s next stroke was torturously slow and too shallow. He expected some crass remark about his staying power but what he got was a firm hand closing around his balls and drawing them down and away from his body. Zane’s thrusts increased at the same time but his grip on Connor had effectively taken away his body’s ability to give in to the release he craved with every cell in his body.
“Zane, please,” he whispered as his fingers dug into the bedding. His ass felt like it was on fire as Zane began to hammer into him but the pleasure began to zing through him and spread to his limbs. He tried locking his elbows but his body refused to cooperate and he dropped his chest to the bed. Zane’s free arm snagged him around the waist to keep his hips in the air. A tremor of fear went through him as he realized he had absolutely no control over his body or its reaction but then Zane was leaning over his back.
“I’ve got you, Connor,” he murmured against Connor’s neck and in the same instant he released his hold on Connor’s balls and gripped his cock instead. Between Zane shuttling in and out of him and his rough fingers dragging up and down his dick, Connor was a goner within seconds and he tried to stifle his scream against the blanket. A hoarse groan followed but Connor barely heard it as his own body jerked and convulsed and moan after moan fell from his lips. He felt his semen hit his stomach and even his chest as wave after wave of pleasure consumed him. Zane’s slick body pressed his all the way down onto the bed but Connor welcomed it because the feel of Zane’s heavy pants was the only thing keeping Connor from floating off into oblivion. Zane’s breath blew across the back of his neck and it took everything in Connor not to turn his head and beg Zane to kiss him. Minutes passed – he had no idea how many – and then Zane was shifting off of him and pulling free of him. Connor’s body was still too drained to move so he just lay there as he listened to the sound of Zane moving around. He heard what sounded like water running in the bathroom and then more movement. But when he heard footsteps move past the bed, Connor forced his eyes shut because the last thing he wanted was to watch Zane leave the room. But he still heard it and when the door snicked shut a moment later Connor wished like hell he could have found a way to drown out the sound so that he could have stayed in his blissful world for just a little longer.
***
Connor took his time going up the few stairs that led to the first floor of the house. His leg hurt as usual but since his body, and especially his ass, were still tingling, he barely noticed the pain. It hadn’t taken long to get cleaned up and out of the motel room but he’d managed to just miss his bus so he’d had time to sit at the bus stop and revel over what had happened in that dim room. He’d been so distracted that he’d almost missed the next bus and then his stop ten minutes later. His phone had rung almost a dozen times but he could tell by the ringtone who it was so he’d ignored it. Even now as he searched out the key for his apartment, the phone began to ring again. He knew at some point he’d have to answer it or it would go on all day but he still wasn’t ready to leave the little cocoon of peace in his mind and return to the real world.
His encounter with Zane had been everything he’d hoped for and more. Sure, the beginning had started off kind of rough and he’d had his freak out moment when he’d realized Zane was going to see his leg, but the end result had been well worth it. And even if it was just a great fuck, so what? He finally had some answers about himself. Maybe he wasn’t some sex god in bed, but maybe it hadn’t all been his fault either. How many years had he spent thinking that sex just wasn’t his thing…that he wasn’t wired like everyone else? How many times had he watched a partner walk away from him with a smile of satisfaction while he’d felt nothing but emptiness? And why the hell had he let someone like Jason Sutter make him feel less than human?
Connor’s thoughts were interrupted by the door on the other side of the porch opening.
“Connor, my boy, I thought that was you.”
He smiled at Mrs. Finney and turned away from his door. She was standing in her doorway in her pink housecoat that was zipped up to her neck and hung well below her skinny knees. She had on a pair of stockings that looked like they were about to fall down around her ankles and her matching pink slippers had some type of flower embellishment on them. She had her cane in one hand and he blanched at what he saw in her other hand. He’d completely forgotten about the condoms he’d accidentally left at her place but seeing them piled up in a coffee mug that said, Kiss Me, I’m Irish on it had him stammering to find words. And to top it off, he could see the big bottle of lube he’d also forgotten about sticking out of the pocket of her housecoat.
“Mrs. Finney, I’m so sorry-” he began to say as he hurried across the porch to her side of the house.
“Extra-large,” she said with a wide smile, her ruby red lipstick making her lips look thin. He’d never asked her age but he guessed her to be in her late seventies. She was a tiny thing, made smaller by the slight hunch to her frame. “Good for you.”
Connor smiled as he accepted the mug. It was good for him. Zane hadn’t been a jumbo but the extra-large condoms definitely would have been the way to go.
“New man?” Mrs. Finney mused. “Because that nasty boy couldn’t have been more than a small.”
Connor laughed at the description of Jason. To Mrs. Finney’s credit, she wasn’t far off. “The fudge was delicious,” Connor hedged. He pulled the empty plastic baggie from his hoodie and held it up. He’d ended up eating all of the candy while waiting for the bus.
The distraction worked because Mrs. Finney clapped her hands together and then reached out to take his arm. “Come, I’ll get you some more. And you can tell me all about the new man in your life,” she said happily. “Oh, and don’t forget this…probably good you got the big bottle,” she said as she handed over the lube. “Extra-large and all that,” she added with a chuckle as she disappeared into her apartment. Connor shook his head and followed her in.
Chapter 4
“Zane, hold up!”
Zane flinched at the familiar voice but stopped halfway down the courthouse steps and waited. He forced himself to turn and saw his former lover hurrying down the stairs after him.
“I’m kind of in a hurry,” Zane muttered as Declan reached his side. He started walking down the steps again but wasn’t surprised when Declan kept up with him. “What are you doing here?”
“Had to testify in a pre-trial hearing,” Declan said. “Saw you leaving Judge Sumner’s court.”
“Bail hearing.”
Zane cast a quick glance at Declan and was surprised by how good he looked. Not physically because the detective had always been a looker. His rugged features and heavy build had been the first things that had attracted Zane to him. But those hadn’t been what had had Zane zeroing in for the kill when he’d noticed the other man sending him furtive glances last year during a deposition. No, now he looked emotionally content…and lighter than Zane had ever seen him. Guilt shot through Zane and he quickened his pace.
“You have time to grab some coffee?” Declan asked.
“Not really,” Zane said. Declan was the second to last person Zane wanted to be seeing right now.
“It’s kind of important,” Declan said.
Zane finally skidded to a stop and whirled around. “Look Declan, I ended it, okay? Connor’s a big boy and knew the score, so you and that big ass boyfriend of yours can just back off!”
Zane turned to go but Declan grabbed him by the arm. Zane quickly shrugged him off.
“Zane, I just wanted to talk to you about maybe volunteering at a friend of mine’s foundation…they help kids from the street and it would be nice to have a lawyer on hand for the kids who’ve had run-ins with the law.”
Zane stiffened and took a couple of steps away from Declan. He absentmindedly tugged at his tie and then finally loosened it. “Yeah, sure, just send me the information,” he said softly.
“Zane, you sure you don’t
have time for coffee?”
***
Zane’s fingers trailed up and down the smooth cup as he stared out the coffee shop window. What had he been thinking to agree to Declan’s invite?
He glanced at Declan who was watching him curiously. They’d been sitting at the wobbly table for almost five minutes and the other man hadn’t said a word – he just watched him with knowing eyes. That shouldn’t surprise him since he’d seen Declan in action during suspect interrogations. They guy was quiet and methodical in the way he pulled out information piece by piece from an unsuspecting target.
“I heard you made Lieutenant,” Zane finally said in a lame attempt to stall. “Congratulations.”
“Thanks,” Declan said.
“How’s Ren?” Declan’s harsh features softened at the mention of his lover and Zane felt a pang of envy go through him.
“He’s good. He’s working with Dom and Vin while he tries to figure out what he wants to do.”
Zane nodded. He’d never met Ren’s older brothers but he’d heard of the security firm Dom and Vin Barretti had founded together. It didn’t surprise him in the least that Ren was still adjusting to civilian life after being in the military for so long.
“And the other one?” Zane asked.
Declan chuckled. “Jagger’s good too.” Declan took a sip of his coffee. “How long do you want to keep tapping around this?”
“I already told you Declan, I ended it with Connor. There’s nothing else to discuss.”
Zane let his fingers drum along the top of the scarred wooden table as his eyes studied the various carvings that covered the tabletop. Most were just initials but some had hearts etched around them along with the obligatory Cupid’s arrow. He nearly snorted at the idea that the act of carving one’s initials into a piece of wood could somehow cement the bond between two people.
“Then what about us?” Declan said.
That snapped Zane out of his reverie and he looked up. “Us? There is no us.” he said hoarsely.
Declan smiled patiently. “Take a breath, Zane. I was referring to the way things ended.”
“Things ended exactly the way they should have. You got the happily ever after you wanted, right?”
“I got what I needed,” Declan said.
“Want, need, what’s the difference?” Zane said in irritation. “You were a good fuck, Declan. One in a long line of many.”
“And Connor?” Declan said.
“Also good.” A knot formed in Zane’s stomach as he spoke the words but he forced his eyes to hold Declan’s.
But to his surprise Declan just laughed. “You and Jagger are so much alike.”
That was the last thing Zane expected to hear and it just pissed him off even more. “I’ve got to get back to work,” he snapped and stood to go.
“He came to me. Asked if I trusted you.”
Zane stilled but didn’t turn to face Declan.
“For whatever reason he needs you, Zane. From what I saw that day in the bar when Jason went after him, you aren’t completely unaffected either.” Declan fell silent but Zane couldn’t force himself to turn around. And he couldn’t force himself to move forward either.
“You gave me what I needed, Zane. At least in the beginning when we met. I used to think maybe I gave you what you needed too, but the more I think about it, the more I realize maybe that’s not the case.”
“What difference does it make?” Zane asked quietly.
“The difference is that maybe I can be one of the things you need now…a friend.”
Pain erupted in Zane’s chest and he actually rubbed his hand over it before he realized what he was doing. “Send me the information on your friend’s organization,” he finally said before he quickly hurried from the shop.
***
Connor reached for the curtains on the motel room window and drew them closed. He’d managed to beat Zane this time around which meant he had time to contemplate the sensibility of his decision. It had been nearly two weeks since he’d last seen Zane. He’d gotten Zane’s blow-off text the day after their encounter and the crushing disappointment he’d felt had been overwhelming. There’d been no point in responding since he’d already guessed the reason behind the message – the sex for him had been mind-blowing but his assumption that it had been just as monumental for Zane had been wrong. Hell, apparently it wasn’t even good enough for Zane to waste his time on until he found himself a new fuck buddy.
So why the hell had a tingle of excitement gone through him when he’d seen the message from Zane telling him to meet him at the motel? Was he so desperate that he’d take Zane’s callousness in exchange for phenomenal sex? Hadn’t it been similar thinking that had gotten him mixed up with Jason and had kept him in the relationship far longer than he should have been? How many times had he tried to convince himself that Jason’s cruelty was better than being alone?
Connor shook his head at his own stupidity and grabbed his phone out of his pocket. He typed a quick message and hit send and then headed for the door. But before he could reach for the knob, he heard the click of the lock disengaging and then Zane’s large frame was filling the doorway. His phone was in his hand and the screen was lit up. Connor could see the text he’d just sent on the screen. Fuck you.
Zane didn’t speak as he stepped into the room and slammed the door shut. The sound of the deadbolt engaging had Connor taking a few steps back but he knew that the tremor that went through his body wasn’t from fear. Zane was on him in two steps and Connor’s back hit the wall a moment later. Zane’s hand was wrapped around his throat but his hold was light…gentle almost. A thumb rubbed over the pulse in his neck and Connor bit back a moan. He reached his hands out to shove Zane away but his fingers refused to heed his instructions and began pushing Zane’s jacket off his shoulders instead.
Something hit the floor and Connor looked down to see Zane’s phone on the dingy carpet, the message still visible. He felt fingers working his pants open and he let out a guttural sound as his cock was enclosed in a hot, tight grip. After that, he lost all sense of everything but the feel of Zane stroking him and then working his hoodie and shirt off and pushing his pants down. And then he was being turned around so his chest was pressed against the wall and Zane’s leg pushed between his to force them farther apart but he could only move so much since his jeans were wrapped around his ankles. The feel of cool air on his hole should have had him protesting but he let out a ragged sigh instead as a slick finger probed him. A heavy hand clamped down on his shoulder as the blunt finger was pushed into his body and he barely had time to process the intrusion before another finger was added. And then the fingers were gone and Zane’s whole body pressed against his, the fabric of his clothes scraping over Connor’s skin. He registered the sound of foil tearing and he tried to prepare himself for what would come next, but all his mental preparation went to hell as ecstasy rolled through him when Zane thrust into him.
***
Zane buried his face against Connor’s shoulder as he surged into him all the way to the root on his first plunge. He managed to search out Connor’s hands where they were pressed against the wall by his sides and he quickly grabbed them and intertwined their fingers. As he slammed into Connor again, he raised their joined hands and pressed them against the rough surface of the textured wall on each side of Connor’s head. He knew he was being too rough but the combined anticipation of being with Connor again, along with the text he’d received seconds before he’d opened the motel room door, had his whole body contradicting his brain and he couldn’t stop rutting into Connor like a wild animal. He let out a muffled shout as Connor suddenly tightened around him and he knew he wouldn’t last long. He managed to drag one hand free of Connor’s hold, though he highly suspected the other man didn’t want to release him. But since he knew this was likely the last time he’d get to fuck Connor, he was going to make sure it was a moment that was burned into Connor’s memory forever.
“Yes,” Connor whispe
red harshly as Zane dragged his hand up and down Connor’s dick. There wasn’t much room between his hand and the wall but it was enough for him to alternate between merciless tugs and agonizingly slow twists. He circled his thumb over the slit on the crown and then pushed gently into it. Connor swore loudly and Zane did it again at the same time that he changed the angle of his hips so his cock would rub over Connor’s gland. Zane still had his head pressed against Connor’s shoulder and he got to glimpse Connor’s eyes flying open at the exact moment Zane nailed his prostate. No sound fell from his open lips but the shock in his eyes was enough for Zane to know Connor was exactly where Zane wanted him to be. He slowed down his thrusts and his drags on Connor’s dick but made sure to hit Connor over and over in the same spot and every time he did, Connor’s eyes glazed over just a little bit more. He loved the feel of Connor completely at his mercy but it was knowing that Connor trusted him so completely that had something inside of his chest swelling - it was the same thing that had happened after their first time together. It was the reason he’d left Connor without so much as a goodbye that day. But hell if he was going anywhere this time. He’d fuck Connor into a coma if he had to – at least long enough to set things straight.
Zane increased his pace as his own body started to draw tight and he began slamming into Connor again and again as the pressure in his balls intensified. Connor began grunting with each stroke and then Zane heard him whispering his name. Seconds later he felt Connor’s body began to spasm against his and the cock in his hand jerked over and over. The feeling of Connor’s release dripping between his fingers had Zane coming hard and he ripped the hand he still had entwined with Connor’s free and clamped it down on Connor’s shoulder to hold him place as he humped into him as jet after jet of semen shot from his body and into the condom. Even after every last drop left him, his body continued to convulse and Connor jerked beneath him each time his cock pulsed inside Connor’s channel. It was several long minutes before he finally slipped free of Connor and he wasn’t surprised when the other man whispered, “Get the fuck away from me.”
Freeing Zane (Barretti Security Series, Book 4) Page 5
