by Kay McKenna
“They don’t invite you?” He tapped the steering wheel with his fingers as he studied the road.
I laughed unwillingly at his question. My stepfather would never allow me to come along any trip. He despised me, but I would never tell Kevin why. I would never tell anyone why. “No,” I whispered.
“Well, lucky for me they didn’t invite you.”
His arrogance was back in full swing as he sat smugly in the driver’s seat, weaving in and out of traffic.
“Could you slow down please?”
“Oh, I forgot you’re like an eighty-year old. Sorry Miss Daisy, I’ll drive slower.”
The faint sound of Deck the Halls played through the speakers and I reached my hand to turn up the volume. “I love Christmas music, is this okay?”
“You love Christmas music? Why?” he scoffed.
“It’s always so happy and cheery. I don’t know, it gives me hope.”
“Hope for what?”
“This is the one time of year where people actually believe their life can change.” I turned to face him and the look on his face showed me he was definitely not a believer.
“Whatever you say.”
“Shut up. Can we not talk for the rest of the way there?” I crossed my arms over my chest as I sunk down in the passenger side seat.
“Sure thing.” He didn’t look at me and kept his eyes focused on the road.
When we finally arrived at his house, I took in a deep breath while I gazed at the scenery. The house stood strong and I could see a huge weeping willow tree. The leaves were bare on all of the other trees, but the willow drooped over barely touching the ground. The place was beautiful, and I stared to Kevin wondering how someone so awful could grow up here.
He parked the car, and I stepped outside and rushed up to the front porch. With the weather as chilly as winter in Alabama can be, I hopped from foot to foot trying to generate some body heat as I waited for him to retrieve the bags from the trunk of his car.
The front door opened and a beautiful woman with dark hair stood there staring at me. Her eyes were the same shade as the sky and beamed with excitement.
“Hi, I’m Abigail. You must be Holly, Kevin’s girlfriend. Come in Come in. We didn’t even know he had a girlfriend.”
I smiled as I stepped through the threshold of the two-story home. The smell of bacon filtered all around and I stuck my hand out to Abigail’s. “Hi, Nice to meet you.”
Abigail laughed off my hand, and pulled me into a big, warm hug. After she let go, I glanced around to the home and smiled. It was so cozy and inviting. I wish I could have grown up in a home like this. It had been my mother and I alone for so long after my father died. She would usually work two jobs and shuffle us from apartment to apartment. Once she met my stepfather, everything changed. My mother no longer had to struggle with anything. By that time, I was old enough to live on my own, and moved away once my stepfather became too much to handle.
Standing in the living room, I could see the kitchen in the back with a window to the outside. There were two red chicken coop barns out back and to my right, a staircase leading to the second floor.
Kevin stepped into the house and shut the door to keep the cold out. “Hi Abigail, where’s Brandon and Skye?”
“Brandon has her down in the chicken coop. They’ll be up shortly. Hope you two are hungry, I made breakfast.”
Kevin ran a finger down his stubbled jaw as he glanced at me. “Actually we picked up a breakfast sandwich on the way, but I can always eat a little more.”
I stood there, awkwardly as I tried to play the part of his doting girlfriend.
“We’re going to head upstairs and unpack,” Kevin said as he ushered me toward the staircase. Before we reached the staircase, a blonde haired woman came barreling down the staircase with a tall red-haired man following closely behind.
“Kevin, you’re here. How are you?” the blonde said with her arms out. She wrapped Kevin into a hug as she reached the bottom of the staircase.
“Amy, what are you two doing here? Hey, Dan.” Kevin released his hold on Amy and reached for the man’s hand.
Amy was brimming with happiness as her big blue eyes fell over me. The man, Dan was also smiling with his broad shoulders and grizzly red beard.
“Where else would we be? It’s Christmas, of course I’m spending it with my sister.” Amy turned her attention back to me, and smiled. She was pretty, and I could tell with one glance her and Abigail were sisters. Their blue eyes were identical, and I reached my hand out to her.
“Hi, I’m Holly.” Just like her sister, she laughed at my hand and wrapped me into a hug. Kevin was busy talking to Dan, as Amy and I embraced.
“Holly, sorry. This is Dan and Amy. Dan and I used to work together,” Kevin said.
“Yeah, until Kevin left us for bigger and better things. How’s the new job,” Dan said.
As I stood there watching everyone chatting away one thought occurred to me, with Amy and Dan here- where would we be sleeping?
“I’d like to freshen up, which room is mine?” I asked.
“Just up the hall and to the right, you two will share Brandon’s old room. Amy and Dan are in the other room.” Abigail’s finger pointed in the direction up the stairs and I stared at Kevin. My heart stammered, wide-eyed I tried to breathe.
“Okay great.” Kevin didn’t skip a beat, and started to make his way up the steps as Amy and Dan walked off into the kitchen.
“We’ll be down in a little bit for breakfast,” Kevin shouted off to everyone as we ascended the staircase.
As soon as we entered the room, Kevin shut the door. I stared around and noticed the one full-sized bed, sitting center in the room. “Uh, no way are we sharing the bed. I thought we were getting our own rooms?” I grabbed my bag from Kevin as he threw his bag on the bed.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know Amy and Dan were coming. I’ll sleep on the floor.” His eyes were dark as he rifled through his bag.
“On the hard wooden floor? Are you joking? This isn’t turning out well, maybe you can make up an excuse to take me back home.” I thought about it for a moment, but I really needed the money. I couldn’t let Kevin take me home, and I let out a slow breath.
“Listen, I’m sorry. We will make this work.” Kevin’s eyebrows scrunched together on his forehead, and his chocolate eyes stared right through me.
“Well, don’t get any ideas.” My mood was sour and I tried to make myself relax. I would need to get into the part of playing the girlfriend, but I couldn’t seem to lighten my mood.
Hauling my bag onto the bed, I took out my clothes while putting them away in the closet.
“Listen, we need to practice,” Kevin said as I finished putting away the last of my clothes. Dressed in jeans and a light blue sweater, I crossed my arms over my chest.
“What do you mean? I already said no touching or kissing.”
“I know, but come on. There has to be a little touching, like if I put my hand on your shoulder or something.” His jaw ticked as his presence made me nervous.
“Well, then just do it, we don’t need to practice.”
Kevin stalked closer to me, and reached his hand to touch me, and I flinched. He dropped his hand to his side, and caught me again with his big, brown eyes.
“See, I can’t have my girl disgusted by my touch.”
“I’m sorry, I don’t know. I guess I wasn’t expecting it.” We stood close, maybe a little too close and I could smell his scent falling off him. Dark woods and a smell unique to him made me dizzy as he stared to me, questioningly.
“See, we need practice.” His words came out slow and deep as he closed the minimal space between us. He lifted his hand and brushed it along my cheek. The moment his hand made contact, my chest constricted no longer allowing air any passage to my lungs.
Holding my breath, I gazed into his eyes as he gently rubbed his hand down my face. The heat from his hand shot through my body, and I shook my head. Breaking the mag
ic spell he had me under, I backed away.
“Sorry,” he mumbled with a deep voice.
“For what? No, it’s fine. Okay enough practice for one day. I won’t jump if you want to place your hand on me. Just try to keep your hands to yourself.” I shook the shivers from my body as my cheek missed the warmth from his touch. This was crazy. The moment passed, buried deep in my chest to never resurface ever again. It couldn’t, whatever cosmic force was present, it was now banished and the feelings of loathing toward Kevin returned.
“Are you ready to go downstairs, Holly?” he asked.
And then one word brought it crashing back around me again, Holly, my name fell from his lips laced with meaning and understanding. Hearing him say my name sent chills everywhere, but I shook them off with a smile. “Sure.”
We both moved toward the door and bumped into each other as we both grabbed at the handle.
“Sorry,” we both mumbled to each other.
He stepped back so I could make it through the door, and then followed closely behind me.
5
Kevin
As we stepped into the kitchen together, the room buzzed with energy. I tried to push the feeling of the moment with Holly upstairs. Her skin was soft under my fingertips, and her deep blue eyes were fixed on me, and I lost myself for a moment in them.
I wouldn’t lose focus again like that. This girl was a nightmare, and I tried to remember that.
Brandon was by the kitchen sink, with my niece in his arms. Stopping for a moment to watch how he held the baby with such love, I sighed briefly.
“Are you okay?” Holly whispered beside me.
“Would you look at that?” I pointed my finger in the direction of Brandon and Skye.
She turned to me after she stood for a moment staring at them. “I take it that’s your brother.”
I turned to face her as everyone in the kitchen busily set the table for breakfast. Her big, blue eyes stared up at me, and I didn’t think I’d ever seen anyone with eyes so deeply blue and big before. Her eyes were a sharp contrast to the pink lips on her face.
“Yeah,” I breathed.
She plastered a smile on her face and turned toward everyone in the kitchen. “Does anyone need any help?” She walked away from me, and I made my way over to Brandon.
“She’s gotten so big,” I said, reaching out to hold my baby niece.
“Nine months old, but she’s a feisty thing. Just like her mother.” Brandon’s green eyes caught Abigail’s across the room and they shared a sweet moment between them.
Skye was placed in my arms and her light green eyes, the same as Brandon’s shined back at me. She was such a cute child with a light pattering of dark brown hair across her head. Chubby cheeks, soft skin, and all the love and attention she needed.
She smiled to me, and I kissed her cheeks. Holly came up alongside me, and smiled to the baby grabbing her tiny hand in hers.
“She’s so cute. Do you think you’ll ever have one?”
Her question caught me off guard and I turned my lips into a frown. “No, I don’t think so.”
Being here was harder than I thought. Realizing how much I had shut out the world the past few months, I sighed and handed the baby back over to Brandon.
He placed her in a highchair, and we all sat around the table. My heart felt heavy for the first time since our arrival at the thought of my mother not being able to join us. I closed my eyes as I sat there, and felt a warm tingle across my thigh. My eyes shot opened and I glanced down noticing Holly’s hand on my leg.
“Are you okay?” she whispered, leaning in close to my ear.
“Yeah I’m fine.” I grabbed her hand to take it off my lap not able to handle her touch, and returned my focus back on everyone smiling around the table.
The conversation was light as we enjoyed breakfast. Abigail was a good host as she laughed with her sister, and fed the baby.
Brandon occasionally stared at her, and he appeared happy. I took in a deep breath as my heart opened to him more, and the thought of his happiness made me smile.
It wasn’t very long ago when my brother and I wanted nothing to do with each other, and always competed in life. We still had so much to learn about each other, so much to mend.
Brandon called my name from across the table, and I shook away the memories. “Yeah,” I said.
“We were asking what you wanted to do today. I want to show you all of the improvements I’ve made on the farm. It’s been so long since you’ve been here.” Brandon said.
“Sure, I’d like that. Holly, did you want to come along,” I said as I turned to her.
Abigail cut in, “No, she can hang with us.”
Holly smiled and faced Abigail. “I’d like that.”
I smiled as I felt of course she would rather hang out with anyone other than me. We continued eating as soft Christmas music played in the background and I chuckled to myself as I remembered Holly saying she loved Christmas music. What kind of person loves Christmas music? She always seemed happy, but a small part of her appeared troubled, especially when I mentioned her mother. I wondered what the real reason of why she wasn’t with her family this holiday season, and I sat there lost in thought for a moment.
After breakfast was cleaned, Brandon and I put on our winter coats and stepped out back through the kitchen door.
The clear fields of grass were now covered with crops and I turned to Brandon. “What are you growing here?”
“It’s the organic feed for the chickens, and of course Abigail has a small garden of some vegetables off in the corner of the plot.”
Things had changed since I’d been gone, and I was so proud of Brandon. “Brandon, you’ve done a great job here.” I frowned momentarily but Brandon picked up on it.
“Is everything okay?” His blonde hair was highlighted by the sun as it tried to break free from the cloud coverage above.
“Yeah, I’ve just had a couple of shitty months since Vivian and I broke up.”
“But, now you have Holly. She seems great, so far. I’m happy you’ve found someone. How did you two meet?” Brandon asked.
“She’s been my neighbor for some time now, and one day I finally asked her out.”
“That’s great, I can’t believe she said yes to you,” Brandon said, laughing.
“Hey, what’s that supposed to mean?” I shook my head.
“Nothing, I’m just busting your chops. Even though you’re my older brother, I still worry about you.”
“Don’t, I’m fine.” I said as we ventured into the chicken coop. My thoughts drifted to Holly and I wondered how she was getting along with the girls back at the house.
“So, George has been coming by a lot to help as well,” Brandon said, breaking me from my thoughts.
“Sabrina’s father? How is he?”
“He’s fine. I invited him and his wife for Christmas dinner.” Brandon finished showing off a few minor improvements he made as we walked around.
“What did you get Holly for Christmas?” he asked.
Shit. Would I need to get her a present? The thought had never crossed my mind. I would look like a jackass if we all sat around Christmas morning and I had no gift for her. What does she even like? I could get her a new pair of slippers, she was definitely in need of a new pair.
“I haven’t given it much thought yet.” I blushed, and ran my hand down my jaw.
“To be honest, we can go out in a few days and shop for the ladies. I haven’t gotten Abigail anything yet either.”
“Are you fucking kidding me? I thought for sure you would have some major romantic gift that would make the girls swoon, and make the rest of us look like assholes.”
We laughed as Brandon ran a hand along the back of his neck. “With the farm and baby, I haven’t had time to even think about a gift.”
“Yeah, but you love it right?” I asked.
“I couldn’t be happier.” I could see it in his eyes as he smiled at me. Happiness.
I grinned to my baby brother, and raised my hand to pat him on the back. We headed across the lawn to the shed and garage as he finished showing me around.
After a while, we headed back into the house as the afternoon sun warmed up the air just a bit. It was still chilly, but not as bad as the morning had been.
When we walked inside, Holly sat at the kitchen table with Amy and Abigail. Skye was seated still in her highchair and the ladies sipped coffee.
Laughing and joking around, I caught Holly’s eyes and smiled. I glanced around and asked, “Where’s Dan?”
“He ran to the store for a few items we need for dinner,” Amy said.
Brandon leaned over and kissed Abigail on the head, and I felt I should show Holly a little affection as well. I didn’t want to kiss her, she definitely made it clear she didn’t want that. So I leaned in, resting my hand on her shoulder as I smiled to the ladies.
“So, we officially love your girlfriend,” Abigail said, beaming brightly.
“Oh is that so?” I asked, chuckling.
“Yes, so don’t screw it up.” Abigail stood from her chair and went to get a towel off the kitchen counter to wipe Skye’s mouth.
My fingers jerked across Holly’s shoulder as my hand trembled from touching her. Her shoulder tensed and I dropped my hand to my side as I stood behind her chair.
“Holly, want to take a walk? I can show you around.” I placed my hand back on her shoulder, and felt her soft blonde hair under my fingertips. I moved my thumb in lazy circles over her, grabbing a few loose strands in between my fingers.
“Sure.” She bounced up from the chair and my hand fell.
“Have fun you two,” Amy and Abigail called from their seats.
I waved as I showed her out the backdoor. We walked down the steps of the back porch as she wrapped her sweater tighter around her.
“Did you want to head back inside and grab your coat?” I asked.
“No, I’m fine. It’s too cold to not wear it, but too hot to wear it. Don’t you hate that?”
