Her eyebrows hit her hairline, but she otherwise didn’t say a word, just settled in on top of the zipped together sleeping bags like he’d asked. “Now what, Mr. Bossy Pants?”
“Don’t pretend you don’t like me like this. We both know how wet your pussy gets because of it.”
She bit her lip, her eyes burning with hunger.
“Not botherin’ to deny it, huh?” he asked, tossing his sweatshirt into the corner where a groggy CB immediately curled up.
Kenna lifted a shoulder. “Kinda pointless, don’t you think?”
Considering he could see just how much she loved it as he stripped her of her bottoms, leaving her bare for him, he’d have to agree.
“Tell me the truth, Kenna.” He wrapped his hands around her thighs and tugged her toward his mouth. So close, but he didn’t put either of them out of their misery. Not yet. “How much have you thought about me lickin’ this pussy while I’ve been gone?”
“Hardly at all,” she said too quickly, her voice breathy.
“Liar.” He blew over her clit, making her thighs twitch under his hands. “Tell me, and I’ll give it to you.”
I don’t—” She cut off when he ran his nose along the crease where her leg met her torso. “Oh God. Um…”
“How much?” He repeated the move on the other side, his nose caressing her skin, while his mouth actually watered at the thought of tasting her again.
Reaching down, she clutched his head, attempting to direct him where she wanted, though he didn’t budge. On a groan, she said, “All the time, all right? Every damn time. Happy now?”
“Immensely.”
And then with a hum of satisfaction, he settled his mouth over her, licking and sucking every bit of her up until she was a writhing, incoherent mess beneath him. Until she came, his name on her lips while her clit pulsed against his tongue and her walls squeezed his fingers.
“Goddamn, I love how you taste,” he said, licking straight up her center again. “You’ll need to figure out your own breakfast tomorrow, ’cause I’m havin’ your pussy again.”
Kenna breathed out a laugh, her body limp under him even as he rid them both of their remaining clothes. Then, once he’d sheathed his cock, he settled between her spread legs, not taking an ounce of this for granted.
He’d spent a grand total of actual years in a myriad of godforsaken places, dreaming of being with Kenna again like this. And now that he was…now that he was settling between her thighs, her heaven-sent pussy opening up for him and sucking him in like it was the only home he’d ever known…the only home he’d ever need? He’d spend the rest of his days thanking everything in the world that she’d allowed him to be with her in this way again. Had allowed him inside her again—not just her body, but, he hoped, her heart.
They rocked together, their bodies in sync in a way they’d never been before. Throughout their history, they’d had sex, and they’d fucked, but this was something else entirely. He wasn’t even sure he had a name for it. All he knew was he never wanted it to end.
And as she came around him, tugging him into blissful oblivion with her, he vowed to do whatever he needed to make sure she felt the same.
Mac couldn’t think of a better weekend she’d had. She’d been outdoors, soaking in all Mother Nature had to offer and challenging her body, all the while hanging out with her best friend. A best friend who kept handing out orgasms like they were candy.
And there was no question anymore—he was still her best friend. How could he not be with the kind of history they shared? He still understood her like no other, not even Willow. Still supported her like no other. Still saw her like no other.
So, really, it was no surprise she’d fallen head over heels in love with him. Again. The bastard. And now she had no idea what she was going to do…what would become of them.
Because the fact of the matter was, Hudson was leaving…and soon. She didn’t even know where he was stationed right now, or where he’d be heading on the deployment his commanding officer had called him about, or when that would be happening.
The thought of him in a foreign country, taking on enemy fire, made her so nauseated, she worried she might actually throw up the breakfast Hudson had made for them—and, no, it hadn’t been her.
“I had fun with you this weekend.” Hudson hooked an arm around her neck, tugging her into his side to plant a kiss against her temple.
“Me too.” She looked up at him, hand resting against his stomach as she managed a smile, even though her insides were in knots.
He took the opportunity to press his lips against hers. And just like every other instance, it took no time for him to have her face cupped in his hands, his tongue invading her mouth, and his body flush against hers. She both loved and hated how he seemed to get hard the second he was in her vicinity.
How was she supposed to get anything done other than, well, him when he was so obviously as starved for her as she was him?
CB—living up to her name—started barking at their feet, and Mac pulled away with a laugh, Hudson with a groan. He rested his forehead against hers and closed his eyes, blowing out a frustrated breath.
“Tell me her name doesn’t fit,” he said, his voice full of gravel.
She laughed, continuing on the path once Hudson released her. “No argument from me.”
He reached down to scoop up CB, irritation written all over his face. “I can drop you at the shelter anytime, you know.”
But Mac could see it was all an act in the way he nuzzled CB even though she smelled like a dumpster. In the way he continued holding her as they hiked down, conscientious of the dog’s little legs and how much work she’d already done out here before they’d found her.
And then Mac remembered their conversation last night—how Hudson didn’t want to drop CB at the shelter. That thought had buoyed her hopes, but she hadn’t been able to focus on it—not when he’d dragged her into the tent and done unspeakable things to her.
Now, though, her wheels were turning, her mind playing out a scenario where he didn’t send CB to the shelter and chose, instead, to let her stay with him…because he was staying.
The thought carried her all the way down the Ridge, until they finally passed through the tree line to where his truck sat parked where they’d left it. She’d just worked up the nerve to ask him if that was what it all meant when her phone started buzzing in her pocket, an avalanche of notifications blowing it up.
Her heart leaped into her throat when she realized that while she’d meant to send a text to Will about staying an extra night, she’d gotten distracted by the hottie standing next to her. God, she was an idiot—Will was probably worried sick about her.
She pulled out her phone at the same time Hudson reached into his back pocket for his own, his attention immediately focused on what he saw there.
“My momma,” he said, holding up his phone.
Mac swallowed as she glanced at her screen, seeing a mix of missed calls, voice mails, and texts—and not just from Will, but from multiple people in her family, as well as Avery—the list stretching the entire length of the screen and then some.
The ridiculous number of texts all amounted to call me, so she did, starting with her mom, though all it did was ring until finally clicking over to voice mail.
“Momma,” Hudson said into his phone, his brow furrowed as he listened.
Mac was already calling Will, her heart beating too fast, though she didn’t know why. As the phone rang in her ear, Hudson’s gaze snapped up to hers, and something in the look he shot her had the bottom dropping out from her stomach, sending a wave of panic through her. Something was wrong—she knew it. Could feel it in her bones. And no one was answering their damn phones.
“Mac!” Will snapped, both irritation and relief in her voice. “Where the hell have you been?”
“Campin’…remember? With Hud?”
“You were supposed to be back yesterday!”
“I—we…” She cleared her
throat, swallowing down the lump that had formed there. “We decided to stay an extra day. I meant to send you a text, but—”
“You should’ve called! Rory was ready to call in a search party and only relented when I told her about your trainin’—sorry, the cat’s outta the bag on that. And huntin’ you down was the last thing we needed to be worryin’ about now.”
“What’s—” Mac swallowed down the sudden flood of moisture in her mouth, her stomach churning in a way that had nothing to do with her breakfast. “What’s goin’ on? Everyone’s been callin’, and I tried to get ahold of Momma—”
“It’s Daddy,” Will interrupted, her voice tight with emotion. “We need you here, Mac. He had a heart attack. He’s in surgery right now.”
MAC SAT SILENTLY in the truck as Hudson shot worried glances her way. She’d stopped trying to pretend she was okay, because what was the point? He could see right through her anyway.
His hand hadn’t left her knee the entire ride, even when CB had attempted to get him to pet her. He’d held steadfast, and it was the one thing in Mac’s life she was thankful for right now because it kept her grounded when it felt like everything was falling apart around her.
Though her daddy’s initial treatment had begun at Havenbrook General, they hadn’t had the proper equipment or staff to deal with the kind of complications he had, so they’d had to transport him via ambulance to the nearest large hospital. That meant she and Hudson were headed to Memphis.
They’d only stopped in Havenbrook long enough to drop off CB with a bewildered but rolling with it Caleb, Lilah standing right by his side, and briefly explain the situation before they were on the road again. They hadn’t even bothered to change or get different clothes, which meant they both looked like they’d spent the past two days hiking and smelled like they’d danced around a bonfire for just as long.
While she couldn’t stop the ball of unease from tightening in her stomach, she took comfort in the fact that Hudson hadn’t asked if he should come, or if she needed him. He’d simply done so, as if it were a foregone conclusion he’d be by her side.
She couldn’t have been more thankful for his presence, because without it, she was sure she’d be tunneling even deeper into her self-loathing, and she didn’t know how much further she could go.
“Who has two thumbs and is gonna go down in history as the worst Havenbrook daughter ever?” she asked, then pointed to herself. “This girl. I honestly didn’t think I could fail any harder at being a Haven, but I guess that’s what I get for bein’ cocky.”
“Hey,” Hudson said, his tone harsh. He squeezed her knee until she looked over at him, his gaze bouncing between the road in front of them and her. “Knock it off. You’re not allowed to do that to yourself—not while I’m around. It was shitty timin’, and that’s it. None of this is on you.”
She huffed out a humorless laugh, resting her head back on the seat and closing her eyes. “I certainly didn’t help matters, though, did I? Makin’ everyone worry and wonder where the hell I was. If I was safe. They needed to have their focus on Daddy, and instead, it was split.” She turned her head toward him. “And you mean to tell me you didn’t feel like the worst kind of son when it was your momma in the hospital and you were halfway around the world?”
“’Course I did. It fucking killed me. All I wanted to do was mow down every obstacle that stood between me and home, but I couldn’t. That’s life, Kenna. Even if we’d come back yesterday as planned, none of this would’ve changed. Your daddy still would’ve had his heart attack. He’d still be in Memphis in surgery. You bein’ there wouldn’t have changed any of it.”
“I know… But maybe I’d’ve gotten to talk to him,” she said, her voice watery. “Tell the big idiot that I love him.”
She rolled her lips between her teeth, forcing back the tears that threatened to spill over.
“Ah, baby…” Hudson interlocked their fingers and brought her hand to his mouth, brushing his lips against her knuckles. “He knows.”
She nodded, desperate for his words to be true. She didn’t exactly have the best relationship with her father—though, to be fair, none of the Haven girls did. He was overbearing and condescending and antiquated. A chauvinist in every sense of the word. He held views that Mac didn’t, actively roadblocked the things she fought for and believed in with her whole being.
But he was still her daddy, and despite his many, many…many flaws, she loved him.
“Thank you,” she said softly, hoping to saturate the two words with as much feeling as was filling her chest.
“Don’t thank me for doin’ this, Kenna. I’m here because I want to be, and because I—” He cut off suddenly and shook his head, his left hand tightening on the steering wheel.
She held her breath, desperate to know what he’d been about to say and hoping he’d pick up right where he left off. Had he been about to tell her he loved her? And if he did, what would that mean for them?
Instead, he said, “And the next time I hear you say this is your fault, I’m gonna remind you exactly why this whole thing lands squarely on your daddy’s shoulders. He’s an adult who knew the risks and chose to ignore them. That’s on him, not you.”
Feeling an odd sort of disappointment that Hudson hadn’t said what she thought he might—though she had absolutely no right to—she sank back into the seat and closed her eyes, knowing the last thing she needed to be focusing on right now when her daddy was lying in a hospital was her and Hudson.
At some point, they must’ve pulled up to the hospital, and she must’ve stepped out of his truck. Must’ve even managed to walk the distance between the parking lot and the ICU waiting room, because suddenly her sisters were there—all of them, even Nat—crushing her between them in a hug, her arm still hanging behind her because she couldn’t seem to let go of her grip on Hudson.
“Don’t you ever do that again, Mac,” Rory said, her voice stern but quavering, like she was on the verge of crying. “You had us all worried sick. And in case you haven’t noticed, we have other things to be worryin’ about right now.”
Mac pulled out of the group hug and looked into Rory’s eyes, seeing the sheen there, and felt her mouth dry up. “Daddy?”
Rory pressed her lips together, her eyes filling even more, and Mac looked to Will or Nat for answers, both of whom wore tired, weary expressions.
“He’s in surgery right now,” Will said. “CABG they called it—coronary artery something or other.”
Mac swallowed down the lump in her throat. “Open heart surgery?”
Will nodded sagely, squeezing Mac’s hand that wasn’t still encased in Hudson’s. “Momma brought him to the ER Saturday mornin’ ’cause of chest pains. They ran some tests and admitted him almost immediately because of the blockage. He, um…” She brought her hand to her temple and closed her eyes before blowing out a breath and shaking her head. “I honestly don’t remember a lot of the details because the past two days have been a blur. But they transferred him here last night, did a whole bunch more tests, and decided he needed surgery ASAP.”
“How long’s he been in there?”
Rory glanced at her watch. “About five hours.”
Mac closed her eyes and exhaled. She’d been having sex with Hudson on the forest floor without a care in the world while her daddy went in for life-saving surgery. While her momma and sisters and gran sat with the weight of that on their shoulders.
Almost as if Hudson could read her mind, he squeezed her hand and gave a sharp shake of his head when she looked back at him.
“The surgeon said it could take seven or more hours,” Rory said, “so we’ve got a bit yet.”
“Okay.” Mac couldn’t ask what she really wanted to know—what were the possible outcomes of this surgery? How likely was it that her daddy would come out of it okay? What she wouldn’t give to hear his disapproving tone as he reprimanded her one more time. “Where’s Momma?”
Her sisters split apart and gestured down t
he hall toward a bland waiting area where her momma and gran sat, their heads resting against the wall behind them, eyes closed, hands clasped together between them. Surrounding them were Nash and Finn, both men with their long legs sprawled out in front of them, their arms crossed over their chests, heads tilted at odd angles as they slept.
“How long have y’all been here?” she asked.
“Since last night. We followed the ambulance up here. Sean’s out of town, but thankfully the girls are stayin’ at the Waverlys’ house until I get back home.” Rory lifted her chin in Nat’s direction. “Then Nash ran and picked up Nat from the airport a couple hours ago.”
Mac wrapped her arm around her younger sister and tugged her into her side, pressing their heads together, not even realizing how much she’d missed her until this very moment. “I thought you were supposed to be in Morocco.”
Nat waved a hand in front of her. “Meh, Morocco can wait. I knew y’all’d fall apart without me, so I postponed my shoot and hopped on the first flight I could get.”
They all must’ve been exhausted, especially her momma. They’d been here, pacing the halls of the hospital and worrying themselves sick. All while Mac’d been having sex in a tent with her non-boyfriend and worrying about watching a damn sunrise.
Even with Hudson’s reassurances in the back of her mind, she couldn’t stop the thoughts from bombarding her, every one of them boiling down to the fact that she’d managed to fail at being a daughter, and all she’d had to do was show up.
“Someone better tell me something to take my mind off all this nonsense.” Nat huffed and crossed her arms, leaning back into the uncomfortable chair. “Isn’t it just like Daddy to ruin a perfectly good trip home?” It was obvious she was trying for snideness, but the wobble in her voice meant she didn’t quite pull it off.
They were clustered in the waiting room where they’d been for the past three hours, save for the short break when Finn, Nash, and Hudson had gone to grab everyone something to eat. Momma and Gran had only managed to nibble, most of the food going cold and uneaten in the takeout containers.
Captain Heartbreaker (Havenbrook Book 4) Page 16
