by Tijan
The memories kept coming, and I remembered being a little girl. My mother had just read a book to me. I was the princess, and I needed to find my prince. She tucked me in bed, kissed my forehead, and said goodnight. I hadn’t gone to sleep, though. I crawled out and went to my window. As I placed my hand to the window, I closed my eyes and wished to find my prince. I wanted my own fairytale so bad, and I wished with all my heart. Something left my body. It sailed through the window, gliding seamlessly, and looked back once. My body remained in the room with my eyes closed so tight and my lips pursed together, sitting there in my pink princess pajamas. My blonde hair had started to grow, and it flowed over my shoulders, shining from the moonlight. I looked like I was praying, but then I looked back in the air, floating over the forests. I floated over lakes, over houses, over cities.
Then I went somewhere dark. I didn’t know where, but I grew scared. It wasn’t where I wanted my prince to be, and I tried to go back. I couldn’t. Something had taken hold of me. It clamped a hand on my ankle and drew me close. I tried to scream, but no sound came out. Then it pulled me tighter and looked into me. Red eyes pierced through me, and I felt something behind it. I tried to peek around him, but he wouldn’t let me go. He didn’t want me to see, so all I could do was whimper in his hold. Tears ran down my cheeks, I felt them on my skin, and knew I was crying in my own home.
“Dad, let her go,” a little voice spoke up.
I prayed he’d listen to him.
He did; he let me go. I flew back home, and when I slammed into my body, I ran to my bed and curled in a ball. I remembered closing my eyes and wishing that I would never remember that again—I never wanted to feel that terror again. I only wanted to be a little girl.
“Oh my God!” I curled my fingers into his arms. “That’s when it happened, when I didn’t want to be what I was. I wanted to be normal. That’s when I…”
Kellan kissed my forehead. “It’s when you created this.” His hand lifted up my sleeve and touched my tattoo. “This banded her inside of you, but she broke free tonight. That’s why the binding has changed. She’s separated herself from you, from your hold.”
My eyes bulged out when I saw the one silver line. It was at the bottom, separate from the rest that were now jumbled together. “I don’t understand any of this. This is all too much.”
Kellan lifted me and went to his bed. He lay down and pulled me back into his arms, then he rolled and propped himself above me, looking down. His finger traced the side of my face and trailed down my jaw, back up to the other side before his palm spread wide and he cupped my cheek, cradling my face in his hand. “That’s what I mean when I said that I came here for you. I’ve always been here for you. You made that spell that night, and you couldn’t see your parents any longer. You couldn’t even see your mother, even though she’s human. She frightened you too much because you always saw the demon that she loves. You saw that in her.”
“Gus and Vespar’s dad.”
He nodded. His eyes looked haunted. “For a while, you wouldn’t let yourself even see them. There was too much demon in them, but then I came. Your mother let me in. She knew why I had come. She knew what you had done that day and she blamed herself. She said she shouldn’t have read you that book, but she didn’t know it would bring you to me. Ever since then, I’ve been in charge of you. You’re mine, Shay.”
I drew in a shuddering breath, hearing his last words. “I am bonded to her.”
When I woke, I was in Kellan’s bed, in his arms. He had curled them around me and held me against his chest. The sheets had been pushed off to the floor, and our legs were entangled together, poking just over the end of the bed.
“I am bonded to her.”
I shivered as those words came back to me. He had looked at me, looking straight through me, claiming me when he said, “You’re mine, Shay.”
He seemed so angelic when he slept. His eyelashes were long, the tips resting on the skin underneath his eyes. Delicate. Then his cheekbones angled outward, drawing the eye to his lips.
I touched his lips and wondered what they would feel like.
Then I realized what I was doing—I was checking out my brother, no—he wasn’t. Clasping my eyes shut, I buried my head underneath the pillow and let out a silent groan. Too much had changed, and I no longer knew how I felt about anything, even Kellan who wasn’t really my brother, but something else entirely. It was too much, at least that early in the morning. Figuring I could sort through everything later, I knew a trip to the bathroom was more pertinent, so I slipped out from underneath his arm.
I took a moment to breathe once I had closed his bathroom door. So much had happened, too much. Looking up, I gasped when I saw my reflection. My hair had been black before, but it was a light-colored brown now. Streaks of blonde had appeared, and my mouth fell open when I fingered through the strands. Then I felt my cheeks. A blush seemed to have permanently appeared on my face. My skin tone had been pale before, and it was now a golden tan with a slight pink color over my cheekbones.
Suddenly, my arm started to burn, and I looked down to push up my sleeve. The silver line was still there, broken away from the other brown ones. I couldn’t believe that it had changed, too, or maybe that was why all these other changes had happened. I traced the tattoo slowly, wondering what other events had changed because the messenger broke free from me.
Then a different thought crossed my mind. Why hadn’t Kellan said anything—when had he noticed my appearance changes? I turned, intending to ask him, when I saw something else in the mirror. My eyes widened, and I sucked in my breath. My green eyes were no longer green. They had a smoky color to them now. The green was still there, but in the background. I shivered, feeling spooked.
How had I missed that the first time?
Shaking my head, not feeling good about any of it, I returned to the room, but found that Kellan had gone downstairs. Fine—I headed to my room instead. But when I got inside and changed into a white tank top and blue jean shorts, someone knocked on my door. It was a tentative knock, and I knew who that was. Opening my door and finding Gus on the other side, looking a little sheepish, I knew my guess had been right.
She hadn’t talked to me since yesterday at the lake. From the hesitant look on her face, how she had both of her hands wrapped in the white afghan shirt that hung on her, I was guessing she still didn’t want to talk to me.
“This is going to be good,” I mused, moving out and holding the door wider for her.
She came inside slowly and sat on the edge of my bed.
I turned and regarded her. “What’s up, Gus?”
Her eyes had been looking around my room, skirting around, but then she looked at me and gasped. “Your hair!” Bolting to her feet, she lifted some in her hand. Then she looked at my arm. “Your—what is this?”
I shook her off. “It’s nothing, just a tattoo. Why’d you come up here?”
“I…” Her eyes were transfixed on me now, but she closed her mouth and shook her head. “Oh. Okay. Uh… I was wondering what you think Kellan is going to do?”
“About what?”
“About the messengers coming and what happened with Dylan. Plus, with Kellan making everything how it was before.”
“Except for Leah. Her life is worse now.”
Gus shrugged. “At least she didn’t lose her parents.”
“At least she had parents before—”
“Who were horrible to her,” she whipped back at me, glaring. Gus stood, her shoulders rigid, and she took a deep breath. The anger clung to her, but she tried to control it. When she had, she asked further, “Do you know what Kellan is going to do when the messengers come?”
“I don’t know.” And I didn’t. “Have you ever dealt with a messenger before?”
She swallowed tightly and shook her head. “No. You?”
Yes. But I shook my head. “No.”
“I bet Kellan has. He’s the most powerful, except you, but do you think—?” She
looked up, hopeful.
“I can’t control my powers.”
The hope vanished, and she hung her head again. “I suppose. Vespar’s worried. He doesn’t want to say anything, but I can tell. He doesn’t even want to go mess with some humans. I thought it’d be fun, maybe make him feel better. But he said it’d make things worse since Kellan warned us not to do anything.”
I nodded. “That’s a smart move.”
“I just…” She sighed, biting her lip and then crossed her arms over her chest, hugging herself. “I don’t know what to do. I’m scared, and I’m worried about Vespar. You don’t think… Do you think we’ll survive this? Maybe we should run?”
“If Kellan thought we should run, he’d tell us. He hasn’t said anything about that, though.”
“Yeah, you’re right.” Then she looked up again, but her eyes skimmed over me as she kept looking around the room. “I made some food. Do you want some?”
“Sure.” I frowned as my sister left with a little bounce in her walk. She seemed more carefree, as if she’d unloaded some of her worries on me. I had no idea how that happened, but it was Gus. Sometimes, my sister didn’t make sense to me, what she thought or felt even. What I do know was that she’d go straight to Vespar and tell him about the change in my looks. He’d, in turn, go to Kellan and ask what they meant, why I looked different. What Kellan would say was a mystery to me. I only knew he wouldn’t give them the whole truth, but some of the truth. Or he might give them a complete lie, but I’d follow his lead.
Then, as I went downstairs, I saw both of the twins at the table with our esteemed older brother, who lifted his eyes and scrutinized me for a moment. I felt him searching inside of me, but then he looked back at his fruit, dismissing me.
Vespar’s eyebrows twitched when I sat across from him, but he didn’t say or let any other emotion slip out. His eyes only slid to Gus’ who gave him a grin in turn. And to this, he rolled his eyes, shaking his head, and went back to eating his toast.
“Coffee, Shay?” Gus slid a cup across the table to me.
I reached for it, surprised at the gesture, but it was knocked over when Kellan jerked the table, moving his chair closer to it.
“Hey!” I cried out.
Kellan shrugged. “Sorry.”
Vespar frowned for a split second, but then he stood and grabbed the coffee pot. “I’ll pour you another one, Shay.”
“Actually, I was going to take her into town. We can pick up some more there. That stuff smells foul.” Kellan stood and took my elbow. “Come on, I have an appointment with the principal. We’re all going to be homeschooled for the rest of the year.”
“We are?” Gus sounded surprised. “Can you just do that?”
“When I get him in his office alone, yeah, I can. He won’t even know he’s signing the papers until they’re already processed. Mom and Dad called ahead on our behalf anyway.”
“Where are they, anyway? I haven’t seen them this morning.” Vespar leaned against a counter and slid his hands into his front pockets, looking casual. His eyes weren’t, as they seemed to study every word and action from Kellan.
“I told ’em to leave. They aren’t safe here.”
“And we are?” Vespar stood now with his hands still in his pockets.
Kellan moved so I stood slightly behind him and Gus stood also, slower. She was in the middle and glanced between her two brothers uneasily. Then her eyes shifted to mine, and I knew she was asking me what was going on. I shrugged. It was between the guys, not us.
“Right now, I think we’ll be fine, but we’ll see once the messengers arrive.” Kellan shifted his hold on my elbow and urged me upstairs. “Go get your stuff. We gotta go now.”
As I darted upstairs, I knew something had just happened between Vespar and Kellan. What it was, I had no idea, but when I grabbed my purse and bag, everyone was quiet as I got back downstairs. Kellan gave me a closed grin and held open the door. “Come on, sis. It’s my treat at the coffee shop.”
I ducked under his arm, and as he let it go, I heard Gus mutter inside, “I want to go for some coffee.”
“Shut up,” Vespar snapped at her. And then the door closed, shutting out anything else he might’ve said.
“Come on.” Kellan took my elbow again and led me to his car. Once we were inside, I asked him, glaring, “What’s with the manhandling? I can walk all by myself, you know.”
He glanced at me from the corner of his eye, but didn’t respond as he drove onto the street and headed toward town. After a few more minutes, I asked again, “What’s going on? What just happened back there?”
He grimaced, watching the street. “No one but you drinks coffee. You don’t think it’s odd that he made a pot? Just for you? He gave that cup to Gus. He wanted her to offer it to you.”
“What are you saying?”
“What did Gus say when she went to your room?”
“Nothing. She asked what you thought we should do about the messengers. She said that Vespar was worried.”
“Vespar’s more than worried. He’s already figured out his plan, and that’s a sacrifice. He wants to give you up, saying that you did everything.”
“What?” My mouth fell open.
“I heard him planning it this morning.”
“He was planning that with Gus?”
“She doesn’t know. She went upstairs to distract you, make you think they’re going to do what we want, but it’s not true. He sent her up there to say that to you, but she doesn’t know why. Gus is left in the dark, but I heard his thoughts. It’s what woke me up.” Then he grimaced. “And he’s scared about your appearance. He doesn’t know what it means, that you look different, but he’s worried that it’s because of your powers. You might be more in control of them.”
I swallowed tightly, feeling betrayed. A whirl of emotions was going through me, but I asked, dumbfounded, “And what about you? Doesn’t he think you’d be mad about me?”
“He thinks I’ll miss you, but I’d understand in the long run. He also thinks it would impress me, that he thought of that on his own. He thinks he would save us from the messengers.”
“What an idiot.”
Kellan grinned, but then sobered. “He suspects that I knew what he was doing. I didn’t want you to drink the coffee, and normally I wouldn’t care. Vespar’s not stupid. He’s now more worried than before since I went against his plan, either by accident or on purpose. If it’s the latter, then he knows I chose my allegiance.”
“And it’s not with him.”
“Exactly.” Kellan took my hand as he pulled up outside of our school. “I want you to stay in here.”
“Why?”
His eyes shifted past my shoulders, and he nodded in that direction. “Because you have a visitor.”
I looked over and saw the painter. He stood in the shadows of some trees on the edge of our school’s lawn. As Kellan got out and headed inside, I followed suit but went the opposite direction. When I drew closer, I saw the painter was in a hooded sweatshirt with it pulled over his head. His eyes were so bright, trying to look inside of me, but he remained where he stood. His hands, like Vespar’s, were also stuffed in his front pockets. He looked casual, but the tension was thick around him, clinging to his form.
I stopped just before him, unsure what to say.
“She got out,” he spoke first.
I nodded and gestured to my arm. “The tattoo changed, too.”
“Your messenger side is powerful now, almost more powerful than your human side, but she’s quiet. Why is she quiet?”
“I have no idea. I’m still adjusting to being a hybrid and all these new changes with having a messenger inside of me.”
“She’s a part of you; she’s just been separated because that’s what you wanted. You didn’t want to be intertwined with a messenger so you separated yourself from her. You’ve given her an altogether separate personality because of it. It’s not right, to have something inside of you that you can’t cont
rol. And you don’t control her. You know that, right?”
I gulped. Control her? I didn’t even know she had a different personality. “How do I do that?”
“Stop denying who you are, for one. As you become more familiar with your messenger side, you’ll become more whole and her personality will become meshed with you. It’s the only way you can control her, if you take control of yourself.”
It made perfect sense when he said it, but doing it was a whole different story. “I’ll get to working on that then.”
He frowned and jerked forward, but stopped and slammed back against the tree. “I’m sorry. I reacted, and I shouldn’t have.”
“What?”
“Nothing.” He looked away and hunched his shoulders forward. “Does Kellan know what you are going to do when your father comes to town?”
I swallowed tightly. My throat felt like bark had grown inside suddenly. “I haven’t told him that information yet.”
“You should. You have to. He needs to know. Otherwise, everything might be ruined. You might be ruined.”
Riddles. Everything was riddles. “Yeah, okay. I’ll tell him.”
“I mean it, Shay. Kellan has to know. He’s bonded to your human side. He’s been able to control his demon side because of it when he’s around you, but if your father arrives, and he’s not prepared, his demon might react too strongly. Someone will die, someone
