Kevin Hays sat in the middle of the stands. You had to give the kid credit, he was fully invested. Scott held my elbow as we climbed the stands. Did he think I was a clumsy idiot? “Relax Katie, he’s a gentleman. It’s not all about you”. I thought.
I sat between the both of them and tried to concentrate on the game. Occasionally my shoulder or knee would brush against Scott sending an electric charge throughout my body. He had to be aware of what happened. How could he not be? I mean it was like the ozone layer was set on fire whenever we touched.
Mattie started at point guard and controlled the game like a small general. Kevin couldn’t stop smiling and was her biggest cheerleader. Every time she scored all three of us would stand and yell “Go Tigers, Go Mattie”. She’d look at us and sheepishly smile while trying to hide a flaming red face.
The game went well and I had a great time. Kevin got Scott to do the three person wave. Some of the others bystanders thought we were crazy. I didn’t care. It was fun not being invisible.
The Tigers won by twenty points, thanks in large part to Mattie. The teams ran off to the locker rooms after the final whistle. There was a momentary awkwardness as I tried to figure out what I was supposed to do next. Did I wait to congratulate Mattie? Did I leave? Kevin saved me by announcing his attention to wait.
She ran from the locker room a few minutes later. Her wet pony tail hopping back and forth and a huge grin plastered across her lips. She gave Scott a hug then turned and hugged me, thanking us for coming. Letting go she made a move as if to hug Kevin but thought better about it and pulled back. “Thanks for coming. I was surprised to see you guys here. Your cheers were driving the other team crazy.”
Kevin kept his smile and fought to hide his disappointment as he stuck his hands in his back pockets.
Another awkward moment settled over us until Mattie asked her brother, “Are you taking me for pizza like you promised.” Scott smiled and nodded.
“What kind of pizza do you guys like?” Mattie said to Kevin and I. “I prefer just extra cheese, Scott likes them with everything. Please help me here; I never get it my way.”
My heart skipped and I shot a glance towards Scott, did he mean for us to tag along or had his sister just put him in an untenable position. His face was its normal impassive, emotional blank face. He was impossible to read and it drove me up the wall. The man didn’t let anything come across. Not unless he wanted you to know.
He shifted from foot to foot and said, “You can get what you want when you start buying. But with the four of us, we can probably get both.” His smile at Mattie’s glowing response said how much he loved his kid sister.
I hesitated at his truck. Mattie opened the door and motioned for me to sit in the middle. I would be squeezed next to Scott. My heart got a lot of exercise thinking about it. I slid in while Kevin jumped in the bed. I know he wasn’t supposed to sit back there. It was one of those rules that people around here ignored. The cops didn’t enforce it because they thought it was a stupid law. They’d all grown up doing the same thing.
The faded paint of Scott’s black and white F150 made it appear older than him. For all I knew it might have been. The insides smelt like old leather and fresh hay and all Scott. I wanted to sink in and never leave. The engine sprang into a deep rumble when he turned the keys. He shifted into first gear and his hand accidently touched my knee. My leg jumped and hit the radio. The music shifted from classic rock to a country station.
Mattie laughed. “No one’s allowed to change the station,” she said, shaking her head. “It’s all he ever listens too.”
My brow raised in a questioning look. Obviously this was a sore point between them.
“It was the last station dad had programmed in.” He said shooting Mattie a withering stare.
I regretfully moved my legs out of his way. I’m sure there is a rule somewhere that says you’re supposed to stay out of the driver’s way when he shifts gear. It was a rule I desperately wanted to ignore.
We piled out at Joe’s Pizzeria, the best and only pizza joint in town. Mattie punched Kevin’s shoulder for some reason then ran inside to pick the best spot. Kevin of course pretended to chase her. When I looked over, Scott frowned and shook his head at their antics. “What?” I asked.
“I don’t know if I’m ready for her being interested in boys.”
“She’s fifteen, believe me, she’s been interested for a while.”
“I know,” he said continuing to frown. “But this is different.”
“He’s a good guy, she’d be lucky to get him.”
“No guy’s good enough,” he said pulling the door open for me. “But your right, he is a good guy, she could do a lot worse.”
Mattie and Kevin were sitting next to each other in a back booth. Their heads together as they fought over the best crust. I guess I had to sit next to Scott. Correction got to sit next to him. He always made me feel tiny and feminine.
This had sort of turned into a double date. Mattie’s face glowed with pleasure and I wondered if she’d set this up on purpose. Was it her way of spending time with Kevin or was she trying to set me up with Scott. My stomach started revolving like an old fashioned record when I thought about her doing that. He wasn’t ready, and was most definitely not interested in dating me. Besides. I didn’t date. Rule number one, don’t get involved. Remember?
A thousand thoughts flew threw my brain. I was so lost in my own little world that I didn’t see the waitress approach. She flashed Scott a smile and I wanted to rip her lips off. What, was I invisible? Hold on Katie, I thought. This was not the way things should be going.
Pulling myself together and ignoring the electric buzz coming off of Scott. I focused back on the others and got Mattie into a discussion about the game.
The pizza was great and the conversation better. Unlike the cafeteria. It was nice to be part of a group. Is this what normal people felt? I liked it, the laughter, the warm feeling of belonging. They’d welcomed me and treated me as if I was normal. I’d never let them know the truth; I couldn’t stand the idea of them being disappointed in me.
Those thoughts led me into thinking about the man next to me. I knew I didn’t have a chance in him being interested in me. But still. I fanaticized what would it be like for this special man to find me special. For a short while I forgot about my past, the pain and shame were washed away and I felt wonderful. Life was great.
There is a rule, I think they call it Murphy’s Law. Things that can go wrong will go wrong. That was my life to the ninth degree. We had almost finished when the door opened and the leaders of the popular clique entered. Laughing and joking like they didn’t have a care in the world. John and Nicole were holding hands. She’d dressed in skin tight jeans and a low cut top. A fashion statement that only a few girls could pull off, unfortunately she was one of them. Gina looked gorgeous as always. A classy skirt and sweater set that enhanced her perfect figure.
I snuck a peak at Scott to see how he was taking her entrance. He didn’t see her, his eyes were totally focused on Danny. The group noticed us and froze in place. They had a hasty conversation before selecting a booth as far away as possible.
Mattie stopped talking in mid-sentence. The light hearted, happy feeling had been washed away as if someone had dumped a bucket of cold water over everything.
We finished up. Scott left a generous tip and paid the bill at the cashier while the rest of us made our way outside. I hung back. No way would I leave him in there alone. He cast a glance back towards them then joined me at the door. Flashing me a smile, trying to reassure me that everything was okay.
Clouds had moved in while we were inside, casting everything into gray shadows. A cool wind ruffled my hair. I was glad I’d pulled back. There were some benefits for using barrettes.
We didn’t make it all the way to his truck before the restaurant door slammed open. John and Danny rushed outside followed by the two females of the evil quartet.
“Where you going b
astard? Running away again.” John yelled across the parking lot.
Scott slammed to a halt and hunched his shoulders as if someone had shoved a knife into his back. My heart raced and my hands got all clammy. Why couldn’t they leave us alone? I prayed that Scott would keep going. That he’d shake it off and ignore them. We were all getting so good at ignoring them. But no, he couldn’t do that.
Kevin jumped out of the back of the truck and Mattie joined him as they walked toward us to help. The fearsome foursome continued towards us from the other side. Four on four I thought. I knew who I’d attack if necessary. Gina Woods was going down if I got the chance. I wouldn’t mind leaving scratch marks across that flawless face.
Look at me, I thought. Two weeks ago I was invisible. Working very hard to stay that way. And now I’m thinking about pulling some girls hair out at the root.
Kevin stepped up to stand on the other side of Scott and Mattie filled out the end. Scott looked at Kevin and shook his head and let out a little short laugh. A scene from the movie O.K. Corral flashed through my mind. We looked like a bunch of cowboys facing off. I had to stop from chuckling. It was all so stupid.
John made a move towards us and my stomach brought me back to reality. This could get really dirty real fast. I found myself holding my breath waiting for Scott to react.
“John, what would you have done if you’d found Nicole with her feet in the air and Danny buried between them?” Scott said as if he really wanted to know.
John’s face turned white. He looked like he’d been doused with a fire hose. All the steam had been let out. He hesitated a moment and said, “I wouldn’t have ruined our season, man.”
“Doesn’t that make you feel special,” I said to Nicole, loving the way her face scrunched up as if I’d slapped that silly smile right off it. John looked back at her then at Danny. I could tell he was real confused.
Gina’s face was lit up like a Christmas tree, the thought of boys fighting over her had animated her like she was on fire. It bugged the hell out of me, this was all her fault. She’d ruined a lifelong friendship. Destroyed the schools chance for football glory. And demolished Scott’s heart.
My insides hardened into a rock, it’d been a long time since I’d hated someone this much. But I also realized that there wasn’t a thing I could do to her that would make her feel as bad as she’d made everyone else feel. Imagine going through life like that, so self-centered that nothing could affect you.
The tension had been let out of the situation. Scott’s question had taken the steam out of John and Danny wouldn’t make a move without his backup. I needed to get everyone out of there before he changed his mind. “Come on you guys, I’ve got to get home,” I said.
Scott seemed to accept it and walked with us back to the truck. I could feel the cold stares boring into our backs. There weren’t any more snide comments though. Scott’s question had changed things.
We dropped Kevin off first. He hopped out and came to Mattie’s window. She rolled the window down and smiled at him. He stuck his head in and thanked Scott for the pizza, assuring him that the next time the food would be on him. I thought how smart could you be. He was already laying the ground work for next time. Scott chuckled and said “Sure, anytime.”
Kevin turned back to Mattie with a huge smile. “Thanks for asking me out Mattie, I had a great time.”
Mattie’s smile dropped as she choked on a reply, sputtering and hemming. Seeing her discomfort made Kevin’s smile grow even more. Then he shocked all three of us by leaning in and kissing her on the lips. It wasn’t a long wet sloppy kiss, but definitely long enough for her to pull away which she complete did not do.
Mattie froze in place, her face in shock while Kevin sauntered across his front yard like a man who’d just conquered Mt Everest. Slowly her face split out in a huge smile to be replaced by a deep frown.
“What’s wrong,” I asked.
Her frown had changed into an angry scowl. “He finally kisses me and it’s through a car window and right in front of my brother. That’s not how I imagined my first kiss would go.”
Scott and I laughed. She was really upset. I leaned over and whispered. “Other than that, how was it?
She thought for a moment and then smiled again. “Good, very good.”
Chapter Seven
Scott
There should be a rule that little sisters don’t grow up. No it should be a law or something. Kevin and Mattie’s kiss the other day was bugging me to no end. I tried shifting my mind away be thinking about my ex best friend.
Today at lunch I actually felt sorry for Danny. Before Kevin and Mattie had joined us, Katie caught me staring at the lovely couple. I couldn’t avoid it. They drew me like moths to a flame.
“She’ll be pregnant before graduation,” Katie said with a raised eyebrow, daring me to contradict her.
“How do you know,” I said. Surprised at how little her statement hurt.
“She has here claws in too deep. He’s her path out. I bet she’s mapped out four years at college then on to the NFL. What’s worse, she thinks she deserves it all.”
I laughed, “Boy, she’s in for a rude awakening.”
“What do you mean,” Katie said.
“He’ll never make the NFL, he’s not good enough and isn’t willing to put in the work necessary. He’s always been surrounded by a very good team. Always been a big fish in a very little pond. I don’t think he’ll start at the college level, let alone make the Pro’s.”
Katie shook her head as she watched them. “I want to be there when she finds out.”
“I wouldn’t want to be in Danny’s shoes for anything.” I said with a shudder. Thinking about what kind of hell Gina would make of his life made me shiver as if someone had walked over my grave.
“Do you mean that,” Katie asked in surprise.
“What, that I’m glad not to be in his shoes. Yes, I guess I do.”
“Sleeping with Gina Woods. I thought it was every boys dream.”
“Yea. Well, I’ve grown up a lot in the last couple of weeks. You know, -- I don’t think I even liked her, I wanted her. Don’t get me wrong, I liked the way she made me feel, like I was important. Maybe as if I was a little better because I had Gina Woods as my girlfriend. You know?” She nodded in understanding. “But we were never friends. Do you believe that? We were with each other for six months and I can’t ever remember asking her to help with something. Not like she’d have given it. I can’t even tell you her favorite desert.”
Katie stared at her half sandwich the entire time I rambled. I could never tell what she thought. She looked up smiling and said, “Mine’s cheesecake, just in case anyone ever asks.”
Chuckling, I started in on my second burger.
“Six months, -- and you guys never –“Katie asked, her face growing an attractive pink shade of embarrassed.
It took me a moment to understand what she was asking. My back went up, where did she get the right to ask such a personal question? She got the right by standing next to you for a month while you went through this crap, I answered myself and shrugged my shoulders. “A gentleman doesn’t talk about a lady, but since she’s no lady, why not. No, never.”
Katie’s eyebrows rose high on her forehead in surprise. I guess she hadn’t believed the rumors and needed me to confirm them.
“Don’t get me wrong, there were –times—before Gina, girls who were willing, well, a girl anyway.”
“Who,” she asked with a mountain of interest in her eyes.
“I can’t believe I’m talking about this stuff with you. No, I’m not going to tell you. She is a lady, and deserves my discretion.”
“Hmp, Tell me if I guess.” She paused for a second and looked the popular group over. “Nichol, no she’s been with John forever and you’re not the poaching kind. I know, how about Janice Cooper, I here she’s always willing.”
“Put the claws away Katie, they’re unbecoming.” She flashed me a smile. “You don�
�t know her, she graduated before you got here. What about you, are you going to tell me about your love life.”
It was like I’d hit the off button. The color drained from her face and she stared at her lap. Shaking her head she mumbled something about having to go. She stood and was half way across the room before I could register what was going on. She almost ran Mattie and Kevin over in her efforts to get away.
Mattie looked after her and then back at me. “What did you do now!” she demanded.
“I don’t know Mattie, but whatever it was, it was pretty bad.”
Another rule I’d make would be that girls as sweet and cute as Katie should never be hurt. Nobody should ever be hurt like that. I don’t know what happened but it was bad. It wasn’t some simple heart break. Something had scarred her to the core.
Sometimes she’d look off into distance, her face scrunched in pain. I’d try to pull her out of it but could never make her forget entirely. The only time I’d come close was at Joe’s Pizzeria. She’d been so happy. Her smile were priceless. It made me want to get it back somehow.
.o0o.
Katie
New rule Katie, I thought as I rushed for the girl’s bathroom. No joking with Scott about his love life. Better yet, no talking with Scott period. My heart raced out of control and my eyes threatened to explode into tears. How could I let this happen? He must think I’m crazy. No, I just confirmed I was crazy.
The door couldn’t get out of my way fast enough as I slammed into it. The jibber jabber of the occupants came to an instant halt when I rushed in. Their eyes as wide as coffee cups and smiles as big as snakes when they saw my distress. I didn’t care what they saw or what they thought as I crashed into a stall and threw up my lunch.
So much for being invisible. I couldn’t believe I’d allowed myself to get into this state. I’d lost situational awareness as the military geeks said. Scott had been so cute when I teased him, my insides had gotten all mushy when he talked about himself. The fact that he might ask me questions had never crossed my mind. For a moment we’d been normal teenagers teasing each other. The next moment my guts had been torn out as visions of my hell had flooded through me.
Certain Rules Page 5
